DO THIS EVERYDAY To Start Manifesting LOVE Into Your Life!

In this episode, I'm gonna show you step by step exactly what to do every day so that you start manifesting love into your life. These are gonna be ways of removing the blocks that are holding you back. These are, a lot of times we're blocking ourselves and we don't even know it. It's an energy field thing. We're repelling love or we can't even view opportunities that are already in our life because of our vibrational state and the way that we're showing up. In this episode, I'm gonna show you exactly what I did that completely shifted my life, that allowed me to attract love. And I'm gonna show you exactly what you can do so that you can do the same. Welcome back to another episode on the Aaron Doughty Podcast. Now, on this episode, we're gonna be going deeper into understanding the step-by-step practical sides of what to do to attract love. Now, the funny thing is that when we talk about attracting love, Everything on the outer reality is a reflection of the inner reality. So in order for us to be magnetic or to feel attractive, the key is to first off be in our own energy and to feel that way. We must feel attractive, we must feel magnetic, we must have that sense of self-love because then that emanates off of us and then it attracts to us different things that are in vibrational resonance. Now, getting even deeper into what we're talking about today, there's 5 main things I wanna share that I did that were practical that I did every day that started to transform my life when it comes to understanding this whole attract love thing. Now, the first thing that I did that I think also many of you may find blocks with unless you let go of is this one thing. Now, realize what you put out is what you get back. I didn't realize this at the time, but one thing I was doing is I was judging other people. I would have this, I was either judging the woman I was dating or I'd have many reasons in the mind why things wouldn't work out. So it's like I was, it would almost already failed before we even went on dates because I had like all these judgments. And this is what I found. I found that because I had those judgments, when I would then go on dates with people I was dating, they'd also have judgments or subconscious judgments about me. So it was this interesting thing. And I had so many reasons for this. My buddy, I remember my buddy Matt always telling me, he's like, "You were like the ninja at talking yourself out of love." And I was like, "What do you mean?" And it was funny before I was successful and when I was living at my dad's house, my excuse was I'm living at my dad's house. I'm, you know, working this 9 to 5 job I don't like. Then I started going on YouTube and then it's like, well, yes, I do what I love and I make YouTube videos and I work full-time at it, but I still live at my dad's house. And then I moved outta my dad's house and I moved somewhere else. And then there were other excuses. Then it was, I live with, I have roommates. There's no way I can date, you know, I have roommates. How could I bring someone over? And it's like, I have other roommates here. I have other people. And then there was just always a deflection mechanism that I had. And then it got to a point where I had a block around that of, I was then like, well, now that a relationship was gonna get in the way of my success, that's what I believed, and even dating. And then after that, I started making money and I started becoming successful. I'm like, well, when I date now, people are gonna want me 'cause of my money. So no matter what it was, there was some type of deflection mechanism there. And this is what that really was. The judgments were there to keep me single. The judgments were there to keep me single 'cause single meant safe. And that's what I want you to become aware of. What if this whole list thing that you have, you have lists of like, oh, the guy has to be this and then this and he has to do this for a living and all these things were ways of guaranteeing that you would not have to go through your own intimacy blocks. A way of guaranteeing that you don't have to get into the unknown. Because what our ego does is our ego wants us to stay safe. And sometimes staying safe means if we have a belief that says that all, you know, this is something I become aware of, by the way. I have this belief that people are trying to take advantage of me. Why? I don't know, maybe between 7 to 15 years old, having the ex-stepmom in my life and her taking advantage of both my brother and I in the sense that we were always, being treated bad, we weren't allowed to have, we had no freedom, we were always given rules. I now have this thing that I become aware of, and mainly with money, I have this belief that like with money, even with friends and stuff like that, that people wanna take advantage of me. And I could see that it's like one of my core stories. And I even look at my dad, for example, my dad had my ex-stepmom in his life who is not my, you know, real mom, so I don't have to ever talk to her again, but I've seen her make my dad's life pretty challenging. She lied about her income and stuff. She owns a business, so she lied and said she only makes like $20,000 a year. So my dad's had to pay her a very high amount for alimony and stuff for my sisters, who that is their real mom. And I could just tell they've been through a lot of, there's like a lot of like thing, like it just, she's made my dad go to court so many times. And my dad's playing out a specific archetype in a specific role. but now even I look at my dad's challenge with love and he has the same thing where he's like afraid people are gonna take advantage of him. He's also, I could just tell he's kind of afraid of women just in general. Like he wants to date and stuff, but he's afraid that if he does, he's gonna like, it's gonna make his life a living hell or something. So it's like he's got his foot on the gas and then at the brakes at the same time. But I could see that in my own life, I had these subconscious beliefs and a lot of like attracting love, it's bringing the shadow into the known. Out of the unknown into the known. So for me, the biggest blocks with love, especially, you know, my whole love life changed at the beginning of this last year, within the last 12 months of me recording this. And one of the main things, and that's what I'm sharing in this whole episode, is the first step and also the most powerful one is to stop judging, to let go of your list, and to open up. Your heart. This was the key. This was one of the things that changed everything for me, is I actually began to open my heart and I stopped negating and like talking myself out of like opening myself up to love and intimacy. And I started opening up my heart, not only to other people that I was dating, but also to myself. Because there was an inherent shame that I felt. I felt like there was this belief, remember the subconscious is running most of our life, there was this belief that said that I'm like shame, that I'm not worthy. How could other people really love me when I'm not worthy? Why am I not worthy? Because when I was a kid, this happened, this happened, emotionally unavailable this, emotionally whatever. And we come up with these stories to these meanings that then remain on autopilot. So I had my heart closed to myself. I wasn't allowing myself to really open myself up to other people that I was dating, and therefore I felt like I was in a little box. And I was safe in that box, but I started opening up my heart and I started like going out on dates and I started like, I stopped judging. And I'm not kidding you, within like a couple weeks, everything changed. I had all these stories and these blocks just around dating in general. And I realized that it was just these self-fulfilling, there was just these stories I was telling myself. And it was these stories that said that I'm not good enough. And it was subconscious, but it was like, and on paper I had people that were all on my ass, friends, and they're like, what do you mean? You should have no blocks whatsoever. Which even then made me feel worse because they're like, you have all of this stuff. And you know, I like, they're like, you have this clout. You have this, you have that, you have abundance, and you're having trouble? And I'm like, yeah, there must be something wrong with me. And then I would feel even worse about it. I was living in Sedona at the time, and I remember I was just feeling like blocked. I didn't know what to do. But then I started opening up my heart and I stopped judging, and I stopped talking myself out of intimacy and stopped talking myself out of dating. And I had all these rules, like if they knew who I was, was from YouTube or something. If I'm meeting spiritual, if I was gonna date spiritual woman, there was somewhat of a likelihood that maybe they've seen my content or something like that, just 'cause it's kind of a niche, you know? Not being egotistical and saying, of course everyone's seen my content, but that was kind of like, but then I had this rule that if they knew, then it was weird. And oh man, it was just so challenging. But then I opened up my heart. And when I started opening my heart, I started dating, and then I had all these options. I stopped judging. And then that's when I met Heather. And when I met Heather, it was like an immediate connection and it was immediate, like, which leads me to my second point. The second thing that I had to do, the second thing, and I especially had to do this with Heather, is I was very clear and I was very vulnerable with her. The vulnerability was something that I used to shut out where I wouldn't be vulnerable in my life. And because I wasn't being vulnerable, it was like women wouldn't know where I stood with them because I wasn't showing intent. I wasn't showing what vulnerability is, like the ability to show how you really think and feel. And I was ashamed. It was almost like I was also ashamed of my own sexuality. And there was, I got like different, I got different levels of this. I'll share a story with you guys about this as well, but the nice guy and the people pleaser. So the second step to this is vulnerability, being able to show sexual intent. And an example of this as well is that my dad's going through the same pattern because my dad was friends with somebody that like he knew from work or something like that. He started like wanting to date her and she came over to have whiskey and they're like talking and stuff. But then he goes to make a move on her and she's like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, what are you doing? And my dad felt super bad. He's like, whoa, I didn't realize that I was doing something wrong. But I knew what he was thinking because I used to also be the nice guy. In his head, he was like, oh, here's my moment. Here's my moment to show sexual intent and to show vulnerability. Now that we're at the house and we're drinking the whiskey, oh, here we go. Mwah. Like that. And she's like, whoa, what are you doing? Where did my dad go wrong with this? He wasn't showing that intent from the very beginning. It wasn't authentic from the very beginning. It became this thing where it was like, we're friends, we're talking about work, all this stuff. I'm very nice. My dad's very fun. He's very nice. But then all of a sudden he's like moving into like this next thing Aaron Doughty was like, "Hello, look at." And then he's feeling blocked. "Why am I blocked?" is what he's wondering. "What'd I do wrong?" I'm like, "Dad, you should have been showing the intention from the very beginning." That's what I had to learn to do. Because once somebody puts you in a certain bucket in their mind, you kind of stay there. This girl, this chick that he was working with, is probably like, "Oh, he's a friend." Boop, friend bucket. It's hard to go from the friend bucket to the romance bucket. In the same way, like for a guy, maybe it's hard to go from like, the sex bucket, if that's all the relationship is, into like the relationship bucket or something, you know what I mean? So it was interesting, but I could tell that that vulnerability there, that the nice guy people pleaser is afraid of their own sexuality. They're afraid of their real desires being shown because they don't want to be rejected. So vulnerability and the thing that you can do every day So first off, open your heart, stop judging. Second, vulnerability, showing more of your vulnerability every day. This is a way you're being, this is a value system as well. What do you value? If you value other people's opinion, what other people think of you, then maybe you stop yourself from being vulnerable. But the thing that I had to do is, especially with Heather, from the very beginning, we were like DMing each other on Instagram. She also does what I do, so that kind of helped buffer the whole like, YouTuber dynamic thing. No, it didn't like have any idea of who I am. But then what I did is I was very clear when she was coming, she was like coming to Sedona to meet me, 'cause we knew each other online for years, 'cause she also has an Instagram, YouTube channel and stuff. And I was just very clear with her. I was flirting with her and showing her that I had intent and not just talking about spiritual concepts with her. We're not just gonna do some Pleiadian activation thing. It's like, no, this is like, that was my intention with her is like showing sexual intent, showing that I was attracted to her. And then when she came to the house, I remember she came to my house. I first met her, it was like 11 at night because she was driving. She drove like 12 hours, like, I don't know, she drove like 8 hours from San Diego. She gets there and immediately there was like this dynamic where her and I were like touching each other and just like, there was obvious sexual polarity there. And there was flirtation there and then like going back and forth, but it was like, It's very obvious from the very beginning. There was no question, no doubt in the mind that like, oh, does this guy just wanna be my friend? And that took, by the way, for me a couple times, like even going on different dates and stuff where I had to like get it and prime myself to not have that shame of like showing my true emotions or like my true desires of like what I really wanted to do, being upfront. And a lot of times, even with my dad, by the way, I told my dad, if when she, when he got rejected or whatever, when he was like going in for the big move, sometimes that's even not a shit test, but that's sometimes what they call it is like a shit test. But it's like, depending on how he responded to that, I think he could have actually used it in his favor. But if he was like, oh, I'm sorry, I didn't recognize that. 'Cause leading is a masculine thing. And like, that's what I was doing with Heather from the very beginning, leading. Her and I have very strong sexual polarity because I'm leading the whole damn time. So for my dad, it's like if he were to stand in that tension, 'cause that's the thing people pleasers and nice guys are afraid to do is they're afraid to stand in tension. But if he were to switch that, it would change, like, you know, he would embody it differently. Now, another way that I became aware of this sexual shame, I was in Tulum. I was in Tulum, this restaurant, this hotel called Nomaday. It's like this trendy place. And this is like when I lived there in 2019 or something like that, or 2018, end of 2018 or 2019. Anyways, I was in Tulum and I was going to the bathroom and the bathrooms were co-ed and they were like these, there were these bathrooms with like a sink and then there were like 6 stalls and it was co-ed, men's and women. And then there were these stalls and there was like music playing, it was kind of loud. And there were people apparently in the stalls and I could hear people's voices so that I knew that there was somebody there. And there was this guy that was like the dad, right? The dad that was kind of to the side. And I went and I realized that there was no way to know if somebody was in the stall or not. So what I did is I had this thing where I went over and I couldn't, basically what happened is I go and I couldn't figure out who was in what stalls, but I figured, oh, if I can just push open the fucking door, then nobody's in the stall, right? Well, what happened is I pushed open a door and then there's like some, there's some chick in there, there's a girl in there. And I was like, holy shit. And I didn't know that there was someone in there. I didn't know what that, like, there was no, Even if it's explaining right now, I'm getting frustrated just even explaining this story because it was so, the guy, basically there was a dad there that got super like angry and shameful at me. He's like, what are you doing? He's like, why are you trying to go in there? I'm like, well, it's a fucking bathroom and I have to take a piss and there's no way to know whether the, like there's someone in there or not. She should, oh, what it was is there was a way for her to lock the door. There was a way to lock the stall. The stall wasn't locked. So I went to the one that I thought was empty and I opened it and then there was someone in there. I didn't see anything. It was like, you know, I couldn't give a shit about any of that. Like as if I would even want that. But he was so triggered that I opened up the door and then his daughter was there or whatever, but she should have locked the fricking, if she would've locked the door, that would not have happened. But the way he responded was really shameful. He was like, what are you doing? Like, there's my daughter's in there, blah, blah, blah. And it was this big deal. And I felt so much shame. "And I was like, well, she should have locked it. But then I just realized, like, in that moment I felt so powerless. Like I did something wrong. I shouldn't have done that. And I didn't, like, anybody could have made that mistake because the chick didn't lock the door. Your daughter didn't." And she was like, I don't know, his daughter was probably like 17, 18 years old. It's like, she didn't lock the fricking door. She would've locked it, it wouldn't have happened. But anyways, I digress. That made me aware of how much shame that I had because I felt I wasn't in my own power. I could have easily just stood up to this dude and be like, "Dude, she should have locked the fucking door. This is your fault. Maybe teach her how to lock the door." Nothing, not that it's your fault. I'm not trying to revert the shame back onto him. But that made me aware of that sexual shame because just in the sense that there's a lot of shame there because why did I feel so guilty and so bad about that? You know what I mean? But also at the time that I was still working through the nice guy stuff. So it was like, I didn't want tension. I didn't wanna be in the tension of somebody that was mad about something that I accidentally did. In a place where like, you know, somebody could have done something to refrain it. But it's an interesting thing. Like, that was an interesting dynamic. But becoming aware of the shame was a key for me. And also just showing my actual, not accidental, you know, around like opening up a bathroom door to somebody that didn't lock it, but more so even just like in dating, actually showing sexual intent. So that's another aspect of something. It's, you know, there's a lot of stigma in the dating industry or just like, you know, attracting love and stuff when it comes to like playing games, right? I was watching an interview the other day of Pete Davidson. I just find him a fascinating character. And somebody said, why are you so good with chicks? You know, he's dating Kim Kardashian, he's dated Ariana Grande. And you know what he said? He said, you know, I just don't play those fricking games. You know, you have these games where like someone's supposed to text you and then you're supposed to like pretend for 3 hours you're doing shit. And then you're supposed to text them back. He's like, I'm just like straight up front and just real and honest. And in the same way, it's like vulnerability is honesty. It's like, oh, it's like the ability to show yourself and to not be shameful of it. There's this big thing playing games, texting at this amount of time, all this stuff, that's all manipulation. And if you lead with manipulation, you're either gonna attract manipulating people or it's gonna be built on this like inauthentic vibe. So one thing you could do every day is be vulnerable, be vulnerable and like show your true self. Now for me, the third thing was key. The third thing you could begin to do every single day is let go of neediness. And to let go of neediness, it means letting go of shame. Neediness says, I'm not complete, I'm not whole enough already. And a lot of my like anxious attachment style I think came from feeling emotionally abandoned when I was a kid. So I had this needy energy where there's something wrong with me because this person's not paying attention to me, they're not emotionally present. Oh my God, there's something wrong with me. And oh, then I had this core belief that I'm not worthy. And then I'd go out and attract people that also were emotionally unavailable because guess what? That felt familiar. That felt like childhood. It felt like I was going to the primordial home. And here's the crazy thing. We will fight and argue to keep reality in a toxic way. I have a friend right now that's going through this where she's like releasing a guy that's obviously trauma bonded to her. And she's going through this process right now of releasing the addiction, being honest that neediness, wanting and needing validation, approval, or someone else to complete you is an addiction. And a lot of times what we're actually addicted to is we're addicted to the old story. My friend has a story that she's too much. She's too much and people can't handle, and guess what? She had that same pattern dynamic with her dad. Her dad thought she was too much. She felt, maybe her dad didn't even think she was too much, but maybe she just felt too much. I'm not worthy, I have too much emotion, this is how I am. And then what happened is she felt shame. I'm broken, there's something wrong with me. She also felt like her dad wasn't choosing her, so she attracted a guy that's not choosing her. And then it's like, there's like this addiction to it that she's becoming aware of and she's letting go of. But that addiction is because it feels so damn familiar to dad. I've had times in my past where I feel like I'm not also being chosen or I feel like someone's emotionally unavailable and I could tell I'm fighting for it because it feels so familiar. And if I could just fix the person that feels that like emotional unavailability and I could get them emotionally available and if I could like, just fix them and help them, then they would finally love me and I would finally be enough. Just like my friend, I can tell she thinks if he would just choose me instead of choosing all these other chicks that he's like dating on the side or whatever, then I would finally be enough. I would be like, I validate, it's a validation trap. That's what neediness is, it's a validation trap. And the key to getting rid of that validation is understanding your own values. When we were talking about a little bit earlier, if you value what other people think about you over yourself, then you're gonna need their validation. Probably as a kid, you had to tune yourself to your outer environment to get the validation of other people in order for you to feel safe. And now what you're doing is you're looking for validation from other people so that you could feel safe. but you can feel safe by validating yourself and knowing and raising your values. We have an order of values in our life that we're unaware of. These values are like virtues we live by, and within these values are the beliefs. And if we value what other people think of us over our own, then we will live in that way. What I had to do is I had to value authenticity and vulnerability over caring what people thought and over significance. And as I changed that, everything in my life began to change. So the thing that you can do every single day is become aware of the neediness and start to change around the values and live according to the virtue of vulnerability and authenticity. And what that looked like for me is that looked like me catching myself when the neediness would come up. And that would mean that I would then be in my own frame. And as I would do that, it was like everything would begin to change as like a reflection of that. So that's another thing that you wanna do is let go of all that. Now, the other thing I wanna mention too, just in general, is one thing that you must do to attract love is you must let go of the past. There's probably one person, maybe you fantasize about them, maybe it was a relationship you were in or you're not in anymore, the more energetic space you give to that, the less energetic space you have to allow something new in. And that was something that was absolutely key, key for me. In the beginning of this year, I had to completely let go of my ex in order for me to then move on. And I had to make a conscious choice to do that. And it was one of the most challenging choices I've ever made because it was like I had to really get to the core of my core wound and I realized that that core wound stemmed actually back to childhood. And I had to, the releasing the shame bit was realizing that my parents' emotional unavailability growing up was their stuff, not mine. I didn't have to internalize it anymore. Even my ex-girlfriend's stuff was like her stuff, not mine. And we're all working through our stuff at different levels. There's not right or wrong, but I had to realize that the energy that I was playing with, I could stop internalizing it thinking I didn't, It wasn't like, I'm not worthy. Even my friend that's going through this trauma bond breakup thing, I can tell that she's realizing that, oh, the fact that he's not choosing her does not mean that she's broken. That's his stuff. He's looking for validation from other chicks or whatever. That's his stuff, not hers. It doesn't mean she's not worthy. It's to stop internalizing that, but also to let go of the past. And the next thing, that will completely change your life and help you to attract more love into your life has to do with frame, being frame of being in your body and leading in your own life. If you're not doing what you're passionate about, you'll probably find somebody else that is also not doing what they're passionate about. Anytime I had a girlfriend when I was working a 9 to 5 job I hated, the girlfriend, you best betcha, was working a 9 to 5 job she hated. And then as I started going full-time on YouTube, guess what? I started dating, the woman I dated after that was somebody that was doing what they love. And even now, my girlfriend Heather, she does what she loves. She makes videos, she makes music, she does what she loves, and I do what I love. And it is a perfect balance because it's always a reflection. So the thing that I would recommend you do is you start to get in your own frame and you start— one of the most attractive things you could do is to be in your own frame. And to be in your own frame means you're going after what you're passionate about. You have a vision for yourself. Whether you're a masculine or feminine energy, having a vision for your life, having a vision for yourself, going after your passion, stepping into the unknown is attractive. And the more you do that, the more you're going to then find that synchronicity in your life begins to unfold in a very magical way. I've seen many people who, like my, I have a buddy of mine who, I think I shared this in a prior episode, but he loves playing hockey. He started dating somebody that he's now married to, but He, in the beginning, he was struggling with sexual polarity. And the reason was he had all these things he loved doing when he was single. He loved going out and hanging out with friends. And then he had this pattern where then sometimes he would, you know, make her the centerfold of his life. Like she is the North Star and he would stop, he stopped playing hockey. He stopped doing what he's actually passionate about. And then he was having polarity issues. And then when I was talking to him, I was like, dude, go do what the hell you're passionate about. It is, you are more attractive to your girlfriend when you play hockey, I guarantee it. Because he loves hockey. Not just 'cause, oh, he's carrying the archetype of a hockey player. No, he loves hockey. He's doing what he loves. He's leading, inviting her to his hockey games or whatever. Another thing I was recommending he do is like lead and like, it was funny though, one time he tried doing this 'cause he already had a frame with this girl. You know, he's obviously married to her now, but he already had a frame that like she, I think, would choose like where they ate and stuff like that. I was like, dude, like text her, like lead and tell her where you're taking her out to. Say, hey, we're going to sushi, we're doing this, we're doing that. And he told her and he said, okay, okay, babe. It was a big thing for him probably. He's like, we're going to sushi, put on the sexy dress or something like that. I'm gonna be at your house at 7 to pick you up. And he tried that. And then she goes, actually, I think I'm not really in the mood for sushi. Can we try this place? And she like diverted the leading. He tried though, he tried, you know? But that's why it's so important that you start it from the beginning. You know, like I'm lucky because with my girlfriend, I get to lead and she just like is able to be like, you know, it's just the dynamic is much cleaner because I started that from the very beginning. Let's go do this. I remember even showing her my house and like holding her hand and pulling her and going to other parts of my house, like showing her in the living room. And like, I remember just leading. It's just like how you do one thing is how you do everything. But being in your own frame is key. You only are trying to find meaning in your partner, you will find that what happens from that is like you put them at a pedestal, you end up being needy, you end up making them more important to where they feel that repelling energy. So you wanna like also have other shit going on in your life. That's another very important part of this process. Now, the last thing I want you to become aware of is, it's a book I'm reading right now, it's called "The Gain, Not the Gap" or something like that. But you wanna be in the gain, not the gap. This is very important because what this means, the gap is where you are to where you wanna be. If you're single, you want the relationship and because you want it, you feel like you lack it. Now, one thing you wanna do is you wanna feel more so and focus on the gratitude that you have in the present moment. Focus on what's already going well in your life. Focus on the family members and the friends you already have. As you're focused on the gratitude for the love that's already in your life, maybe even with an animal, you then are feeling that self-love attraction is even easier. The other thing I'd recommend you do is every single day, you focus and you reframe your own insecurities. Reframe your own insecurities. What that looks like is like, if you're, you know, very insecure about a freckle, like see it as that's what makes you unique. I've showed many examples of this in prior episodes before, and it has to do with just owning it. You just own it. My dad right now, he's got a little bit of a gut and he's like very self-conscious. I'm like, Dad, if you owned that gut, it wouldn't be an issue at all. It's just that you feel like you feel the gap of like, oh, I'm 15 pounds heavier, the whole 19 pounds, whatever. What I would recommend is owning it, focusing on what you're already grateful for, focusing on your own self-love, on what you appreciate about yourself, cultivating that energy from the inside out because that energy emanates out And what happens is as that energy emanates out, people are then attracted to you. That is the most, like the most powerful thing that you could do for this whole entire process. So for this, there are 5 secrets that will help you to become more attractive. It's one of the most powerful videos I've made as of lately. It'll help make you more magnetic. These are things that I've learned in my own energy dynamic process. Check that out here. Click this video, watch it, it'll change your life. People feel what you feel about you. The energy inside of our bodies are contagious and based on how we feel about ourselves, that energy is being emanated out and other people are responding to us based on that energy.