How to detach yourself and still get what you want

You can have anything you dream of as long as you don't want it. Now think of even the visualization process of creating what you quote unquote want. When you visualize yourself receiving what you quote unquote want, you never receive, you never imagine yourself at a car dealership behind a 3-inch panel of glass just wanting the car, just sitting there, you're visualizing it. You never visualize yourself wanting the car, wanting it and really imagining and wish it could be yours. Just like when you're visualizing attracting love, you're not imagining yourself looking outside your window at nighttime thinking, I wish I had my soulmate here. When you visualize, you don't think of the want, you think of the receiving of it. Now, what a lot of people do when you think of this, think of it like resonance. You get what you are a resonant match to in reality. So when people imagine what they want to create, they end up creating a dissonance when who they are being is the person that is wanting. Because realize the version of you that has attracted love does not want to be in a loving relationship, they are. The version of you that is the most abundant version of you does not want more money. That version of you is feeling it is natural to be abundant. So when you think of vibrational resonance, understand the thing you must really embody is matching the energy to where it is natural for your current identity. Because anytime you make something very important, you put it on a pedestal and you really hope it happens in a certain way and you create a ton of resistance. And understand that the version of you that is the most successful is also the version of you where it is most natural. And the name of the game here when it comes to desire is understanding that whatever you look for is immediately further away from you. I cannot tell you how many times in coaching or my 21-day challenges, people want to attract love and they're doing everything they can to attract love. They're going out to the parties, they're getting into the unknown, they're going out to like get-togethers, yoga classes, putting themselves out there, smiling at people. And so often when I tell people and I give them the advice, as I say, just completely let it go. Just stop trying. Just enjoy your life. Don't focus on that area of your life where there's all that resistance. I'm not saying don't avoid or don't like get, you know, don't like embrace the intimacy blocks or whatever it is if your deal is like meeting people. What I'm saying is just let go of the outcome. Because really what this whole video could be about too is just letting go of the attachment to outcome. Because you can do something because it's what you enjoy, or you can do something because of the result you wanna get. And when people are doing things to get what they quote unquote want, it is a means to an end and they stop enjoying the process. So when somebody goes on a date and they're like, is this person my soulmate? Are they gonna be the person I'm with forever? They put all this pressure on it and they create resistance and they then rob themselves of not being in the moment. And then they block the actual love from coming into their life. Like you are more magnetic the more unattached you are because you are more present to the moment and just enjoying the present moment. So instead, if you focused on having fun, enjoying aspects of your life, filling up and fueling the joy and the love and the connections already in your life, you might find that you are more magnetic and that you are more likely to attract love. But the more somebody stays in the wanting vibration is the more they will stay in the lacking vibration. 'Cause understand whatever you want is whatever you are energetically saying, I lack, I lack. It's a different radio station. It's interesting when you think of a radio, you know that the frequencies are everywhere. Like if I were to take a radio and go to this side of my room and play 97.5, I could hear it. Then I could go to the opposite side of the house and put on the radio at 97.5 and I would still hear it. But what a lot of people do is they will play 95 point whatever, 1. It'll be the vibration of lack. And then they'll say, okay, when I go to this part of the house, I will feel natural or I'll feel love. But they go to that part of the house and they continue to play the radio station of lack. And they say, you know what? It's probably because I'm in this side of the house and I need to go to the other side. I need to go actually outside the house and maybe to the pool or this thing over here or the street. So then they bring the radio dial and they go all the way out there because that is the solution to the problem. And then what they do is they tune the radio to 95 and they still feel lack. I'm still listening to this radio station. Now the challenge is that you're going with the radio to different places thinking you're gonna hear a different radio station. The challenge is not where you are. The challenge is the station you are tuned to. So if you were to instead stop trying to tune to that same station and instead of trying to go somewhere else, thinking when I have the loving relationship, when I have the abundance, when I have this, then I'll tune into the love. You must first tune to the love frequency. You must tune to the frequency of being it. And tuning to the frequency of being it is about embodying the energy and understanding that this is an inside-out job. This is not conditional on your location. It's conditional on just your energy. And that's why when you lack, lack, lack, lack, you just experience more lack no matter what you do, no matter who you talk to, no matter what, or job opportunities you go after. That's why even more powerful than any of this is letting it be natural and tuning to a new frequency, knowing you must give yourself the resonant emotions that you're looking for. So if you're trying to attract a relationship or you're trying to attract abundance, what is the emotion you would feel if you had the ideal relationship? What is the emotion you would feel if you had the ideal job? Maybe the job was a representation of freedom. Maybe the loving relationship is a reflection of connection, of feeling companionship or feeling seen and heard. Where, well, where else in your life can you start feeling those emotions now? Because when you start to embody the frequency of it by appreciating where it already is in your life, you may not have the ideal perfect job, but you might be able to at your lunch break. That's why I remember when I had my 9 to 5 job, on my lunch break, I felt kind of trapped having that 9 to 5 job. But on my lunch break, I would go to that of a little cafe, sit down, watch YouTube, or read and eat my food, normally Chipotle. And I would just do that. And I would appreciate that hour. And then eventually what I realized is that I could bring that into other areas of my life and appreciate that even when I wasn't working, I could focus on making videos and I had the freedom to do that. You can give yourself the emotions you wanna feel with your focus. And if you're focusing on lack and you're focusing on wanting, there's a needy energy that believes that once it changes the location with the radio, it's gonna feel differently. It's not gonna feel any different because you need to change the frequency that you're tuned to, not the location of the radio. And the tuner on the radio changes When you change your focus and you change your meanings, your beliefs. See, right now you might believe that the relationship or the money is the solution, but because you believe that, you desire it. You're looking for something external. And one of the most powerful things that you can do is actually to bring it back down and questioning that belief anyways. I know there's been times where I desire certain level of success and then maybe I get that level of success, but then I'm extremely busy. I was looking at other people that had a certain type of business and I'm like, I remember thinking even last year, I was like, I need to be running live events a lot. I see Joe Dispenza and these other awesome like teachers doing that. I wanna, I'm inspired. So what I did is I started running a whole bunch of live events. I did like 2 or 3 live events in like a 2-month period. And the way that I was running them and what I realized was even though I was doing that, it was a lot of energy to run live events and to be figuring all that out. And I'm still running live events, but what I realized is I was putting this pressure on myself. And when I got everything that I thought was the solution, What I realized was that I was trying to, in a way, put all this pressure on myself and I was creating a lot of resistance, but I wasn't as happy as I thought I was gonna be. And at that time I was also like, I'm gonna stop making YouTube videos. The next thing for me is just live events. It's the new me. But what I realized is that that was me trying to take the radio somewhere else instead of me tuning to the vibration of me adding as much value as I can and then letting it naturally go within the rhythm of what I am passionate about doing, which means doing a live event when I feel like it, not pressuring myself to do a whole bunch all at once, and actually recommitting back to YouTube because that's where kind of I realized that once I had enough energy and my energy wasn't going towards all these other things, I had energy to put into YouTube. So it's interesting. And sometimes I think people that are trying to attract love or become more successful, sometimes it also might be a distraction from you putting your energy into other areas of your life that could be growth. But a huge component of this is, are you attached to the outcome? 'Cause what do you believe the outcome's gonna get you? And then they end up robbing themselves 'cause they're not enjoying the process along the way. Now, this is where you also begin to look at your own self-image. What is your internal self-image? How do you see yourself? Because when people would ask me in 2017, when I first got on YouTube and I was like 6 months in of making daily videos and I was full-time, they'd say, how are you able to make videos every single day. And it wasn't like I consciously was like, I am a YouTuber that like has the willpower to make videos every day. It was just as I did it every single day, it became a natural part of my daily habits. And it just became a natural part of my identity. I make daily videos on YouTube. I didn't have to think about it. People would ask me that. I'm like, I don't know, I just do it. I just, I am it. Like I don't, it's easy. It's only hard if you look from down, from a different perspective and you're like, oh my God, that would be so amazing. Like anything that you fit into your 24 hours in a day that you do repetitiously becomes easier and easier. So when you're talking about resonant frequency, you wanna look at the things you're also doing 24 hours in a day. What are the things you do every single day that shifts your vibration? One of them, that has been the most powerful thing for me to really shift is using meditation. Meditation is the thing that energetically vibration allows you to shift. And then you also, something I've been doing more recently is you want to see yourself as that version of you and even carry yourself as that throughout the day. Just knowing, it's almost like a knowing that this is who you are now. Not the knowing of the, oh, this is the lack version of me that wants it. No, I am it. When you are it, you naturally take action. You eventually slip from the wanting into the intention. This is like, well, there are people that want things, that get things, Aaron. They want it and they get it because they move out of wanting it and they move into being it. They move into taking action. Action will mitigate and balance that out. When you're taking action, you're not necessarily wanting it, you're being it. But you can, instead of want, want, want, want, and sometimes people I think are addicted to wanting because of a childhood energy where it just felt natural and familiar to want, to want if your needs weren't met. Maybe it felt normal to want, to want mom or dad to be different. Maybe there's beliefs there too that mom or dad wasn't able to meet your needs. So there's a wanting. And there's a story that then gets projected over all the partners and friendships you have. This is why this can be so powerful to look at. Now that meditation I was talking, I have a 10-minute meditation, it's free. It's not on YouTube or anywhere, but it's free in my new community called High Vibe Tribe. It's a free community. There's a meditation under High Vibe 101. It's a $1,000 course I give away for free inside there. And in there, you'll see under the daily meditations part, their daily, under meditation section, there's a daily meditation that's 10 minutes long. That meditation you could do every single day to visualize that version of you and to feel as if it's this reality now. You must feel gratitude and like it's natural for you. That meditation is in there. You can check that out by clicking the link pinned to the top or in the description box. But understand that this is something that shifts the more that you let go of wanting, let go of the desire. Let go of believing that's gonna complete you. That's the codependency you're literally breaking. And a way to break that is to become aware that you've been attached to the outcome, that you're good either way. Use this as well. I'm good either way. Whether it happens or whether it doesn't happen, I'm good either way. It's not apathy. It's just knowing you, are good either way. Like whether you bring the radio over here, you bring the radio over here, you're good either way. 'Cause you can tune to the vibration of what you want, of not what you necessarily want, but of what you are, what you choose, of what you intend. And that will change so much in your energy. So the next time you're wanting, understand that wanting is a vibration of lacking. And instead focus on being it, focus on taking action as it, see it as natural for your identity. Don't be focused on believing in the outcome of believing that's gonna make you happier. Understand it doesn't matter where you bring the radio, you just have to tune to the frequency and give yourself permission to feel more of that in the present moment right now of whatever emotions the thing you want will bring you. Because ultimately everything in our reality is based on meaning. What do we believe to be true? Beliefs create reality. You give something the meaning that you don't have it and that it's a very important thing, you will put it on a pedestal. Now, if you do want a meditation that will help you to see things as more natural, I do have a self-image meditation. It's one of my most powerful meditations. It's either in High Vibe Tribe or I'll put the YouTube video that has it right here as well that you can watch. Listen to this meditation for 21 days and watch what happens. This video, I'm going to be sharing with you a powerful meditation for transforming your self-image.