Aaron Doughty explains how we absorb others' negativity by matching their emotional frequency, then shows how to stop. He shares a sales story where he shifted a complaining couple's mood by staying upbeat and playful instead of reacting to their complaints. The key: you control your own state, and the person with the strongest certainty shapes the whole interaction.
Welcome back to another video. My name is Aaron and I help people expand their consciousness. Now in this video, what I'm going to do is show you how you cannot let other people affect your energy so much, like how to stop absorbing other people's energy. Now I know that a lot of times this is something that's, you Easier said than done because people can say things like, oh, just don't let it affect you. Just don't focus on it. But really, what are some ways that we can think about ourselves to make it so that people don't have so much power over us and so that we can really just remain grounded into who we are? Well, what I want to do is share with you guys some of the experiences that I've had with this because to be honest, I mean, I've always been a pretty positive person in my life and a lot of times I can be very aware when I'm around people that maybe have like a more like negative mindset, I can feel like that heaviness kind of. Maybe you can relate in a way, like anytime you feel somebody that has like certain things they want to talk about that tends to like bring the energy down. I'm very aware of it and like I can feel it, but some of the things that I've been through that have made me kind of had this realization I'm going to share with you has made it so that when I walk around and I encounter people that may have like a negative type attitude or have that kind of energy, it doesn't affect me nearly as much as it used to. And I want to share that with you today. So the first thing I want to do is just kind of explain a little bit about the idea of what absorbing other people's energy really means, because it sounds kind of like esoteric, but it can really be something that's more practical. But let's understand it like this is how I think about it. When we think about like we're walking around I believe that the one thing that we have power over in our life is our own mind. Like, we have the ability to decide what things mean for us and what affects us. And with that being said, if we walk around and we see people that we label as negative, the idea is that if we let that energy affect us, it comes from matching the same state that they are in, or even more esoteric, matching the frequency of who they are being. And as we do that, that's when we then feel like that energy is absorbing into us and that's becoming a part of us. So really this has to do with understanding how we can remain in our own energy and be at the cause of things rather than the effect. And I'm going to share that experience with you. This is probably like 2 or 3 years ago, uh, working a sales commission job where, you know, I had to give customer service and With that being said, it was like me and another coworker were standing around. There was like no customers yet. And in walked these two people. It was a couple. The guy seemed like he had like more of a, uh, something he was mad about. And then the girl that he was with was like complaining about something. And when they started walking up, all of a sudden the guy next to me walked into the back because it was like he obviously didn't want to, you know, anything to do with it. So I was like, okay, you know, I'm in this situation, but I had like a little switch, like something clicked inside of me where I realized What if instead of going into this situation, instead of labeling it as negative and seeing that I just don't want to be in it, what if instead I allowed the moment to be, but also I chose to just remain completely in my own energy, like have complete control over my own state? So what I did was I was kind of like in self-amusement. I decided that I was going to kind of joke around in like a fun way, not take things too seriously, but also just remain present and grounded in that and not like let somebody else and like not let whatever they were complaining about become something that has like an overbearing over me. So what I did was is when we were interacting and like we first came up to me, we started talking, what I would do is constantly steer the conversation towards something that we could kid about, something about, you know, some like sarcastic comment or whatever it was. And what I did was is I just chose to focus on those ideas and to get like a light type feeling out of it. And when I continued to do that, eventually it was like they popped and they were also in that energy state as well. It was something that was kind of contagious. And in my videos I kind of talked about this before, the idea of the law of state transference, the idea that our energy is contagious to other people and more so important than just like the words that we say is the energy underneath the words. And I really just kind of toyed around with that idea. I focused on laughing, on having fun, and even though at first they were resistant to it, eventually because I remained grounded in it and I was more certain of it, it didn't have so much effect over them. You see, in a convergent— like an interaction with somebody else, whoever has the most certainty about something has the power. Their frame for how they think has power over like who is leading the conversation. Anytime we get into a conversation with people and we take the passenger seat, we don't necessarily steer the conversation. Not that we always have to, but we need to at least remain grounded in who we are. And then we begin to be at the cause and not the effect. And that situation actually turned out very well. It was like we had a connection. They ended up buying something and it was like it completely transformed the way that I thought because I realized that rather than being at the effect and going into the situation just kind of like assuming it was going to be a certain way, I changed the dynamic by changing my own state. Not changing their negativity or what they were doing, but by changing the way that I thought about it and not labeling the way they were being as negative in itself. So I think that's where the power really is in first off, not labeling the situation as negative, but then secondly, choosing to have control over how we feel, choosing to steer the direction of the conversation in a certain way. Sometimes I will be around people that have a more you know, negative things they're talking about, but I always choose to, in a fun way, choose to steer the conversation towards another topic or towards something that is lighter. And as I do that, that's my ability to then not resonate at the same level and state of being that they are by understanding that we have this power within us to decide what affects us. And if we choose to remain in the state that we are and we are certain that that's our state of being, we are then not absorbing other people's energy. So remember that that power is within you, and all you have to do is go into situations knowing that you're going to have the power over how you think and how you feel. And that as you go into the situation, don't be so quick to label the situation as negative. And from that point, you can then choose to allow the moment to be, to be grounded in who you are and you'll find that then people don't have so much power over you. And you can even apply this towards every other areas of your life. Be at the cause, not the effect, and watch how your life changed for the better. That's it for today. I hope you guys enjoyed this video. Feel free to like this video if you liked it, or you can even share it if you found it of value and you don't want other people to let their negative energy affect them. And other than that, as always, much love. I'll see you guys on the next vid. All right, peace. Bye-bye.
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