if you attract toxic people WATCH THIS

The people you surround yourself with affects you at a very intimate energetic level. The people around you, you are absorbing their belief systems, you're absorbing their sense of self-esteem, you're absorbing some of their habits, even the way they view you, the way they view themselves. And until you become aware of how your friends, family, and the people around you are affecting you, And until you become aware of how you can tune to your own energy, you will feel like you are a leaf in the wind around that of these people. You may find yourself attracting toxic people into your life over and over again, asking yourself the question, why do I keep attracting this? Surely something with my energy isn't the reason they're coming. And in this video, I want to show you how to stop attracting toxic people into your life, how to stop feeling guilty around leaving people your life that aren't serving you, how to know if even the people in your life are not adding to your own energy and in a way weighing you down, and how to finally start to find the people that will really resonate with you at a very deep level. I was reading the book last night called Letting Go by Dr. David Hawkins, and in it there's a chapter that's called The Company You Keep, and it talks about the story of this woman who went through a divorce and And what she did is that she then went to a group where she could feel like basically express her emotions. And it was a group of other divorced women. Now, what she found is by being in this group with other divorced women who had very negative, in a way, bitter perspectives of the masculine and of men in general, what ended up happening is she felt blocked. She felt stuck. She felt like, I went through this divorce and I want to heal, but I'm around people that have this very negative view on relationships. Relationships, this negative view on men in general, and she couldn't attract good people into her life, and she couldn't attract men into her life that she really resonated with at a deep level. Well, one of the things that she eventually found is she left that women's group with bitter women that were basically mad at men, and she then went and she started being around people that had healthy relationships. She started being around people that elevated her own energy, and what she found was that in a very short period of time, She met people in her life that she resonated with at a deeper level, and she attracted a relationship with someone in her life that she has a very deep relationship with now. Now, that story is very much a symbol for what we go through in our own lives. I noticed when I had a 9-to-5 job selling women's shoes, I mainly hung out with, guess it, other people that will— not just people that sold women's shoes, but I hung out with other people that worked 9-to-5 jobs they didn't like. And we would, in a way, rationalize I said, man, I have this manager I don't like. I have to go to the work here. I wanted vacation time, but they didn't give it to me. And what ended up happening is I was in a way locked in a certain reality, surrounded by people that also didn't like their jobs. Funny enough, I also would only date women subconsciously that work 9-to-5 jobs they hate because I worked a 9-to-5 job I hate. And by the way, I know people that work 9-to-5 jobs that love their job, that meet and are in relationships with other people that do what they love. This is more of a reflection, but in my life, I have recognized that the people surrounding me are reflecting something back to me. And many times they may be reflecting back to yourself energies that in a way you've simply decided to familiarize. And I've also had it to where I attracted people that reflected a certain childhood dynamic back to me. Like for example, some of you know the story if you know my channel, but the ex-stepmom energy, she was in my life from 7 to 17. in all of my videos, by the way, I used to say 7 to 15. Found out when I went to my dad's in Vegas recently, it was 17 years old when the divorce happened. And basically, I realized that the story in my mind was different than even what was actually happening. However, funny enough, I would attract people into my life even after she left my life at 17 to reflect back that controlling dynamic. And I was always fighting for my freedom. And one of the reasons we tend to attract toxic people into our lives is because toxic people in our lives feel familiar. They feel familiar. And if toxic people in our lives feel familiar, what I wanna encourage you to ask yourself was, was there an energy from your childhood that maybe was toxic that was familial? Familial, which is similar to the word family, right? Familial, family. Familiar. We're in a way trying to recreate the similar dynamics from our childhood, and unless we learn the lesson, we will continue to do so. And the lesson that I had to learn, and I could tell even my dad had to kind of learn it, still maybe going through the process of it, because it is what happens is you get people that are empaths, people that can feel other people's energies, and what they do is they may attract people into their lives that are narcissists, controlling, manipulative, One has a false sense of self that is overt, controlling, and manipulative, and the other one feels super sensitive. And one of the things is, is that may feel familiar to be the empath that is around other people that have this very strong false sense of self. And you may be, what are narcissists teaching empaths? You could say empaths are teaching narcissists how to be more empathic and loving, which of course might be hard, and some of the research shows that it's very rare. That narcissists actually, you know, depending on the level of course as well. But what can empaths learn from narcissists? The toxic side of narcissists. Empaths get to learn boundaries, how to set boundaries, how to say no more, how to stand up to the energy. There are certain people in my life that I can recognize have come into my life that have literally shown me this is how you create boundaries. This is how you stop feeding into their reality. And you also wanna become aware of the payoff to some of this toxic energy as well. Now, a payoff is something we do that we believe we do, and we're not recognizing we're getting a certain payoff about it. A payoff is like a win, even though it might be toxic. So for example, an empath may be able to fix a narcissist and hold so much space for a narcissist and not even realize they're abandoning themselves to do so, but what are they getting out of it? I get to fix the narcissist. I get to be there for them. And if I can fix them, 'cause I'm probably trying to fix my dad or my mom in some way, then I can finally feel whole and enough. So we project that onto other people and we keep them in our lives because there's this codependent energy of fixing people. Are you someone that fixes people or that believes you need to fix people? And subconsciously, could there be a deeper core there where you're trying to fix someone because there's a certain, a certain level of worthiness you're trying to prove. Sometimes we are trying to prove our sense of worthiness by fixing other people, and what we don't realize is that it's not our job to do so. So when it comes to attracting and the company you keep into your life, you may say— this will be hard to hear— you may say, well, I don't know, why do I keep attracting toxic people? Why do I keep attracting toxic people? And the reason is because there's a certain little part of you that has normalized toxic energy, either the toleration of it, tolerating toxic energy, or the drama of it. And that's the part you want to look at because you will continue to attract people into your life to reflect back the unconscious and subconscious suppressed energies that are inside of your body. And the reason they're coming into your life is for you to become aware of what that energy is, and maybe even to say, no more, no more of this. I'm not dealing with it anymore. It is not my job anymore. So the people we attract into our life many times are there to reflect something back to us. Now, when I forgave my ex-stepmom back in 2012, a manager that I had in my— working at Nordstrom's in women's shoes got fired within a week or two of me forgiving her, of me stop playing. I stopped playing the victim is really what I did. And think about it, even for empaths or people that can feel other people's energies. I can feel everyone else's energy, it's not fair, this isn't everybody, I'm not saying this is you, but there's a lot of people, it's almost like I'm a leaf in the wind. And one of the biggest shifts in consciousness you'll make towards your power is when you shift out of victim mode and the payoffs for being in victim mode, payoffs for me back in the day, oh, I didn't have much of a childhood, there's always a controlling person in my life I have to fight against, this is all subconscious. But you stay in victim mode. When I forgave my ex-stepmom and I stopped being a victim, that manager left my life within a couple of weeks. Even if that manager didn't get fired, I would have had more self-worthiness, more self-respect to leave, to like leave a job that I had for 5 years if I didn't agree with the energy anymore. So a huge part of understanding why we attract toxic energy into our life is because there's a certain way we have tolerated toxic energy from the past. If you tolerate toxic energy from childhood or from familiar childhood dynamics as a kid, you might find yourself tolerating toxic energy from other people. So one of the most powerful things to become aware of is where is this a familiar pattern of my past? Where is this a familial pattern of my past? And looking at that and seeing, is there a way I can start drawing my own sense from within? Is there a way I can start tuning to myself and knowing that if someone else has a problem, if I set boundaries with someone else, that's their stuff to deal with, not yours? There's this interesting book I've been reading. It's called The Courage to Be Disliked, and it's about something called Adlerian psychology. Now, Alfred Adler was a psychologist that's considered one of the grandfathers of psychology. Along, among Freud and Carl Jung. And one of the things he talked about is this idea called the separation of tasks. Now the separation of tasks is that basically all interrelationship dynamic, all problems are interrelational problems, interrelational between people. And basically what it has to do with is understanding that you have your tasks, it's called the separation of tasks. You have your tasks that you're meant to deal with. That is how you feel about yourself. That is what your passion is. That's with you being yourself most authentically. And then what someone else wants from you, someone else's recognition or someone else's approval, if you want it from them, it is not your task to get their validation or their approval. That is their task. Trying to manage their task, you have 10 friends and they all have a different perception of you, you might find yourself trying to, you have to literally have a different frame of reality for every friend that you have. Think about the weight and the burden that that carries on your shoulders. It's a lot. But what you can realize is that it's not your task to actually get their validation or approval. In the past, you may have thought that that toxic energy was your thing to fix or your thing to come around with. Just because as kids, we're very slow to think that there's something wrong with mom and dad or their energy is toxic. So we internalize it. We say there's something wrong with me. So what we're really avoiding is we're avoiding the shame. We're avoiding the energy behind not wanting to feel not good enough. Instead of not feeling not good enough and feeling the rejection, what we do is we say, I'm gonna change my center of frame and I'm gonna get everyone else's validation or approval. And then we abandon ourselves to do so, not recognizing that it's not our job. Now in the book, one of my favorite quotes recently I've read, it says freedom is the courage to be disliked. Freedom, I mean, I guess it's the title of the book, but true freedom is not whether everyone likes you. The true freedom is whether you can be yourself and someone can dislike you and you're even okay with that. That's freedom. But a lot of us are familiarized and have tolerated and normalized not being free. So if you want to become free, One of the things you wanna become aware of is what are the payoffs you're getting from maybe staying in the victim mode of the childhood pattern dynamics and of trying to heal because the truth is we attract people into our lives as lessons until we get the lesson. They're a lesson and you will, there's this book called 10 Signs, 10 Rules of Life. One of the first rules is like, you will have a body. One of the other rules is like, there are lessons. The lessons never end. That's another rule. People are mirrors of you. That's another rule. And what happens though is there's lessons. People sometimes are in our life as lessons. And if you don't learn the lesson, you continue to attract it. Just like when I was 17, my dad divorced my ex-stepmom. I attracted a controlling girlfriend in my life for 4 years. I broke up with her. Within that month, I got transferred to a better shoe department with the same manager. That same type of manager as my ex-stepmom, controlling, manipulative, similar energy. I didn't get the lesson yet. You might attract emotionally unavailable people in your life. Now the thing that's hard to see this though is there's a certain normalized, tolerated toxic energy inside the body that is attracting these people. And my question to you is how long until you learn the lesson? You learn how to the separation of tasks of only dealing with your own energy and not making it your responsibility to get other people's approval, validation, or to fix them? And is there maybe a codependent energy there where if I can fix you, you're never gonna leave me? If I can fix you, it's like I'm fixing my mom or my dad. And if I fix you, you'll meet my needs like mom and dad couldn't. But the problem is that you normally attract people into your life that reflect back the energy of that lack because that energy was active. So what you wanna do is focus more on breaking down that belief system because ultimately it's a belief. It's a belief that is rooted in that the external has what I want or need. The external has that of validation, approval, and safety. And once you realize that what you're really avoiding is a certain level of shame, of believing I'm not worthy, I'm not good enough. It's like the fear of rejection. But a huge part of this healing comes when you can actually have the courage to leap into the rejection, knowing if you do get rejected, it has nothing to do with you. It has nothing to do with you. I've had experiences in my life where certain things happen. I've had even, even at live events and things like that, where there's a certain energy that I could go in and be like, oh, maybe this specific thing happened because of some energy from my mom's lineage of the family and all of this stuff. And maybe it's like something I need to fix within myself. But then there was an eventual understanding that, oh, that's just not my stuff. Not that it's my mom's, but in the sense that like maybe if somebody else had a certain type of experience or sometimes people that watch my content, they might believe I'm their, twin flame or something like that, and I'm just not coming around to the fact that we're twin flames. I know this sounds ridiculous, but I'd be like, why does this keep happening? Why do people— why are some— every now and then there'll be someone that's kind of obsessed with me. I think there's something wrong with me or something I'm not doing right. So the energy from my mom's lineage of family— but I realize I don't have to live up to that expectation of like always having to hold that projection. It's like, that's just their own stuff to deal with. Probably honestly, it's their stuff with their own mom and dad familiar dynamics that they're projecting onto me because I seem like an authority. We tend to treat people that we view as authority in a similar way that we may get weird around people that are, that's of like the energy from our parents. So understand that this energy that I'm talking about right now, this toxic energy that we may attract in other people. Now, until you draw boundaries, like think about belief, think if you have friends and they're all overweight and then you wanna go get in shape, just from being around them, just from like anytime you go to the gym and they see you going to the gym, they may judge you. I'm not saying you don't have to like be a victim leaf in the wind and like, oh, they're judging me, I can't go to the gym. You can hold your frame, But you want to start asking yourself, who am I surrounding myself with? Because one of the best ways to really elevate your vibration is to get around other people that have a certain vibration, that are focused on the same type of growth as you. One thing I'm going to be doing soon in my new community, it's completely free, is I'm going to be doing a raise your vibration protocol for raising your vibration. You're going to learn the frame technique, and also it's a community of other high vibe people. So if you do want to join that, I'll go and link it in the top of the description box below. You can join that group. I also do workshops and free meditations in there as well, like live meditations, tapping into the group energy. But in general, a huge part of this process of transformation is understanding, one, that there are other people like you, but there's a toxic energy that has been normalized and tolerated, and you will not make room for them until you become aware of that energy and let it go. And part of this too is understanding that you can use your friends as a reflection for where you are. I have many friends, some of which I'm still close to, friends from high school. I see them every now and then when I go to Vegas and I love it. However, I had a certain like pattern of when I, before I got on YouTube in 2017, I, before that I was smoking cannabis. I was hanging out with friends and partying every now and then. And then I committed to YouTube videos. And then there's this other part where we may be afraid of leaving our friends behind. And I had that. And I remember I had to say no to hanging out with friends because I had to make videos. But I had it real every time I made a video, it reaffirmed my new way of being, my new identity. But sometimes people are afraid of leaving people behind. So this is my live event recently I ran in Austin and someone raised their hand and said, you know, I'm afraid of this, this new empowering path of mine. I'm afraid because I might leave my friends and my family behind. And the thing that we come here to learn as spiritual beings is we come here to learn unconditional love. And the thing is, is if we're afraid of losing, remember, it's not your job, the separation of tasks, it's not your job to help your friends or family accept you as you move into your power, to try to get them to come along. They could choose to come along or to elevate their life, or they could choose not to. That's completely up to them. But what you wanna become aware of is the energy that you're embodying and the energy behind how they're being because their energy and their beliefs of you and how they see you may be projected onto you. Now what if they, by you playing small and being afraid to lose them, what if also that's just an excuse to get you to not take action? But what if you being afraid of branching away from them is actually enabling them to continue to hold a certain expectation of you? Like if you have parents that control and want you to do something specific, like go to college and do this and that, what if by you going along with it, even though it's not what you really want to do, you're enabling them and robbing them of the lesson of learning how they could love you unconditionally. They can love you for you being who you actually came here to be. I know when I got on YouTube, I knew kind of my dad, my dad was supportive, but also subconsciously I know he wanted me to go to college. He's like, you're so smart, you go to college and get a degree. And I went to college for a couple of years. Like, this isn't me. And I knew I was kind of, I was kind of letting him down in that way, but I had to do this for me. But funny enough, now that I'm not even now just because of my success, but the more he saw how passionate I was and the more things started to grow for me, now he sees my level of abundance I live in and now he respects it. He's come around. Not everyone will come around sometimes, but understand what is the alternative? What is the alternative? Are you going to live your life forever tuning to what everyone else wants you to do? Would you rather do something you don't love but get everyone else's approval, or would you rather do something you don't love, get everyone else's approval, but not be happy with your life? Or would you rather be happy with your life, not get everyone else's approval, but at least be yourself? I would rather have the second one. I would rather be doing what I love, and people may not approve of it. I might not have as much, uh, people liking me, but I'll be doing what I love, and that's what matters to me. Now, funny enough, when you do what you love and you're happy with who you are, you will attract other people that do what they love and are happy with who they are, and they will resonate with the deeper core of who you are, which leads me to my next point. If you want to attract high vibrational people into your life, you must first have that of the most authentic version of you activated inside of your body, which means be you, the real you, not the you that's playing small, that maybe is in the victim mode of a 9-to-5 job you hate. Start being the you that is empowered. Have the courage to be you. Have the courage to be disliked. Have the courage to set boundaries. Courage is the key to you really shifting into this new version of you. And until you have the courage, you'll stay in that box. You'll stay surrounded by people that are reflecting back an old outdated dynamic of who you are. I started doing my passion, I started doing what I love. It was still even maybe a year before I met my best friend Victor, for example, who is also on YouTube. My channel started to grow on YouTube and then I reached out to other YouTubers. I'm like, man, I don't know anyone else in Vegas. He didn't live in Vegas. But funny enough, I reached out to this guy and I'm like, hey, I like your videos. And part of what he talked about too, you want to know one of the ways I connected to him is he had one video where he talked about the hermit phase of awakening. And he talked about the story of where he was in like Sedona and he went to a psychic in Sedona and he had his kids and his family and he thought that the psychic was gonna tell him to move to Sedona. And the psychic actually said, no, you need to actually go back home to Michigan, get your stuff together and actually start grounding yourself. Not what he wanted to hear. But he went through this phase of feeling kind of lonely, and it was like that hermit phase, and that, that stuck with me so much because I also went through like a hermit phase of my own awakening where I felt alone for a long time. Like, where's my high vibe friends? For a long time I blocked myself because I thought there's no one else like me, I'm higher vibrational than everyone else, which is spiritual ego. And instead I let that go, and then I started to connect with people in my life in a deeper way, even at my 9-to-5 job. But then when I started being myself on YouTube, I started growing and then I reached out to a few YouTubers and Victor reached back to me. He's like, oh yeah, I've seen your channel. So let's get on a phone call and connect. And then we started talking about business and YouTube and stuff. And then a month or two later, we just kept talking on like we— and we eventually got on a weekly phone call. And then eventually he came to— he came to Vegas from San Diego. He moved to with his family and we went to like this Bashar conference and then we connected. We made a YouTube video together and from that point He ended up moving to basically Vegas. And then that was like the best friendship started. And then from there I become really close to his wife. His family's like my family. And it's become like, and then there's other friends in my life that are a reflection of the same kind of energy that I'm talking about. It all comes though from committing to this new version of you, committing to looking at the payoff and the toxic energy that has been tolerated from childhood and knowing that the things other people may reject or may demand of you, that's their stuff to deal with, not yours. Creating that separation between self and other, which is what it's called, the frame technique. So like I said, one thing I will be doing soon is in that live group, I'm gonna be doing a whole frame technique course that I'll probably put, that I'll just put into a course for free, show exactly what to do with guided meditations. I'll go ahead and link that below. And then also, if you want to check out a video that's on the frame technique that goes really deep in the whole process, I'm gonna go ahead and link that video right here. Welcome to the frame technique meditation and activation. This very well may be one of the most powerful meditations you ever do in your life, and I say that with the emphasis on consistency to this practice. This isn't necessarily meant to be just a meditation. You