Aaron DoughtyAwareness Mastery, Awareness Mastery, Awareness Mastery, Awareness Mastery, Awareness Mastery, LLC · Spiritual Teacher and Educator

If you miss toxic people...

19 Sept 2025 · 1 min

Watch on YouTube

0:46

In this short monologue, Aaron Doughty explores why individuals may find themselves longing for people who were actually toxic. He argues that the longing is not for the person themselves but for the familiar emotional patterns and energies associated with them, which often stem from childhood conditioning. When a relationship feels familiar—such as feeling constantly on edge or walking on eggshells—the brain interprets that as a normal way relationships work. Consequently, people may miss the feeling of those patterns, not the harmful behavior. Doughty emphasizes that unprocessed childhood energies are reflected back in adult relationships, leading to a mistaken belief that the toxic person is missed, when in fact the underlying pattern is what is being yearned for.

Chapters

Why do I miss people who were toxic for me? Often what happens is even if someone was toxic to you or there was a toxic relationship there, if that was something that was familiar to childhood or something that was normalized, you may think or believe that that energy is how relationships and connection works. So what you'll sometimes think is that I miss that person, when in fact what you might miss is you might miss what you felt around that person, even if what you felt around that person was let down, like you are on eggshells, et cetera. So people are reflecting back to us whatever energies may be unprocessed from childhood, but also what energies are familiar to childhood. So think about it like this, you might not just miss the person, you might miss the pattern.