Aaron Doughty explains how childhood family conflict leads us to build protective masks that hide our authentic selves. We adopt people-pleasing behaviors to seek safety and approval, trading genuine expression for acceptance we think we need.
our authentic being of who we really are is love, is passion. But what happens is, at a certain point in our past, we may have experienced some form of tension in the household, and then we decided, I need to wear a mask. The choice was, if I wear a mask, subconsciously, then I will get approval, I'll get validation. Somehow my need will be met if I wear a mask. So imagine that over here we have mom and dad. Imagine mom and dad are fighting. Imagine there's tension in the household, and there's a part of us, our little self, that's sitting there, and it's like, why are mom and dad fighting? So then we Well, maybe if I wear this mask, what I can do is if I wear this mask, then I'll ease the tension in the family. If I become the people pleaser and what I do is I go over here and I try to please mom or please dad, then what'll happen is I'll mitigate the tension in the family and then I can feel safe and I can relax. So what we do is we decide that in order for us to feel loved, in order for us to feel safe, in order for us to feel seen or validated, there's a belief that I must wear a mask and that this mask that I wear is going to get me the love, the approval, the validation, etc.
If you can see this, you're about to become so magnetic you are unrecognizable
