Stop WANTING: How to LET GO & receive more (Works everytime)

When you let go or you surrender, is that giving up something? A lot of times with surrender, people are like, well, surrender sounds like I'm giving up. Sounds like I'm quitting. When actually what you're really giving up is you're giving up resistance. You're giving up the pressure. You're giving up this belief that you must control outer reality rather than allowing things to naturally happen. Now, I was thinking about this because when you think of surrender, right, you think of like someone's waving the white flag and it's like, it's giving up, you're giving up. I surrender, I surrender. And it's like, oh, that's bad. But would you think of surrendering to the divine, like surrendering to God, waving the white flag or whatever, if you trust the other side of the fence, it's a different energy, isn't it? Like if you were to trust God, the universe, or the divine, it's not a this versus them type thing like it is when you think of like in some type of war or something, it's like waving the white flag, I give up. Instead, what you're giving up, you're waving the white flag, you're looking over to the divine, God, the universe, and what you're really giving up is you're giving up resistance. You're giving up the pressure and the belief that I need to do this all by myself, which is interesting because most of the times when you are in a flow state, what are you controlling? Nothing. You are not in control when you are in a flow state, but at the same time you are in control. It's a paradox because you can trust the flow state. So really, when it comes to surrender and letting go, and why when you surrender and let go, things can come to you easier than ever, and also you enjoy the process, It's really about learning to trust the unknown. Does this make sense? Someone says it's hard to give up resistance when you've spent so many years resisting. Is it? I want to challenge that. Is it hard to give up resistance, or is it that you're in the autopilot mind with resistance and and you have a story that the resistance has to be there for you to feel a certain way. So what really you're working on letting go of is first off, the belief that resistance is hard to let go of. You have felt, here's the tricky thing, you have resistance in your life because it feels familiar. Isn't that funny? And also kind of like make you angry. Understand it's just a story. What if that resistance was in the background for so long that it's easy because now you know what that result gets you because you have so much evidence and experience of what resistance does. So it's easy. Like, understand that your beliefs about letting go impacts your ability to let go. Your beliefs about whether beliefs are easy or hard to change will go into your beliefs being easy or hard to change. Your beliefs about the process affects the process. Don't you see? So understand that first off, look at your beliefs about change. Look at your beliefs about attachment. Look at your beliefs about the autopilot mind. Every moment you're a new you. Don't you know that? It's like, no, I've been practicing this story for so long, and because of what I went through when I was younger, and because it feels familiar, I continue to recreate it over and over again. Okay, you can do that. You do that for as long as you want. There's no pressure here. There's no sense of control, like you have to stop living your story. Yeah, it's harder to hold on than it is to let go. That's a good point. You know, I used to say this story and I used to share this, like before I went full-time with my, and quit my 9-to-5 job selling women's shoes. It's like to live under the surface in a job that you don't like and to pretend like everything's okay is actually harder than just making a choice to do this completely new thing, to put yourself out there and to start taking action in this new way. Now, one is more of a jolt to the energy field until you get into the, until you make it familiar. But on the other side of it, The other one just stays under the surface forever. It's like when you think of someone, for example, that is a people pleaser and underneath the surface there's tension all of the time because they're not expressing themselves. But then what happens is you could say, well, there's gonna be tension when you start to express yourselves, but then that tension goes somewhere. It's not under the surface. So really when people pleasers say they don't like tension, they're lying. They like tension so much, they familiarize it so much, they keep it under the surface everywhere they go. So the key is like, do you want to express it and let it go? It's like, well, I've always known this. What if you express, what if the stories you have about the expression is just a story? Like often people will be like, well, if I express myself, then I need to, what's gonna happen if I express myself is all of these negative dominoes are gonna fall down. How do you know that? What if you express yourself and you respect yourself more? What if you express yourself and it weeds people out of your life that don't resonate with the new version of you? What if you express yourself and people have a breakthrough or they realize how you're actually feeling? Look at that side of it. But people say, oh, I just don't— if someone else feels tension, that's subconsciously my tension. Is it? So understand that a lot of this, of what we're talking about, is awareness. And a lot of this is about understanding that the more you are able to embody this new you, that is, you make it natural. Here's another thing too that will really help many of you listening. Whatever goal, thing you want, first off, you want it because of an emotion of how you will feel. Let's first off, let's just put that out there, okay? There's a belief that if I have this thing or if I do this thing, then, "Ah, I'll feel good." Okay, that's the belief. But actually, when you realize you can fall in love with the process of who you are becoming, that's when things really begin to shift. Focus on the, almost the identity, but you want that identity for it to be natural. Like, understand that by the time you have all the abundance you want, It's not going to be this awesome thing on a pedestal. It's going to be normal. It's going to be natural. But what happens is many times people will want something and they will think and believe that this thing is going to bring them eternal happiness. And because of that pressure and because of that lifting up of it, you create energetic distance from it. So you want it to be natural for your identity. Like me traveling the world, running live events, living in nice places, getting to choose where I live, it's natural for me. Like back in the day when I worked my 9 to 5 job, I would see the lifestyle I have now and I'd be like, oh my God, that would be so incredible. Oh my God. But guess what? If I stayed in that energy, I would still be in that reality. Eventually you have to be in the energy of being. Does that make sense? So you're shifting it. You want it to be natural. So if you have a question, go ahead and put questions in the Q&A, the question thing below. You'll see a little question mark, click there, put a question if you have questions. Someone says, if you have debts, it's normal to believe that you'll feel better only when you have money. Yeah, yeah. And it kind of keeps you, it always keeps things in the future. It always keeps things in the future. Like that's something that I recently have become aware of is like owning houses and stuff, that's technically debt and it is. And one thing I've realized recently is I want zero debt. I think that in my mind is freedom, right? So I'm like paying off loans in bulk and like trying to like become completely debt-free 'cause it's like once I'm there, I'm gonna feel so free. But even then I catch, I'm aware that that is also a trap because one day they'll come when there's zero mortgages or anything and how different does it feel? It's like first off, feeling it inside of your body right now. Makes sense. Does that make sense? Let's see some good questions in here. Is the energy of being calm? I would say the energy of being is when you feel regulated in your nervous system. But it doesn't have to be calm, but it might be calm. There might be moments when you're excited, moments when you're in flow state, moments when you're in passion and people say that's not complete. Like, I think it depends on you accepting yourself where you are in the journey and accepting yourself where you are in different states. Does that make sense? Someone says, what technique do you recommend to use daily to work on not being a people pleaser? The technique that I recommend is you lean into tension because a lot of times what happens is people who have developed a mechanism to feel safe, that mechanism is they include and expand their energy field to include their environment. To include the people around them. And what they do is they then say that the emotions of what other people feel is what they feel because they're empathic. But what happens is that the pleasing part is they feel like if they please, then they are worthy. So very often people pleasers also believe that love is conditional and it is something that is earned. Let that settle in for a sec. People pleasers, even empaths, people that can feel other people's energies, very often believe love is conditional. It is something that is earned. And the condition to which love is earned is, am I easing the tension in family? Are you easing the tension? Are you pleasing other people in your life? Because if you're pleasing them, then they are approving of you. So that's what the belief is. It's literally a false belief, and this is an adaptive strategy you've learned as a kid in order to feel safe in the present moment. So what is the best medicine for you to work on daily to be a people pleaser? It's to lean into tension. It's to lean into expression. It's to lean into tapping into your body and asking, how do I feel about this? How can I express myself? That's where the breakthrough is, is when you stop seeing being assertive as bad. Stop believing that easing people's tension is your job. It's not your job. At a certain point in childhood, it's like you wore this hat that said like, I ease everyone's tension, all the tension in the family. And you started wearing that hat and you started going everywhere and you're like, who? Where is there tension? I don't want my friends to feel tension because love is conditional based on my ability to ease tension. So how can I ease the tension in your life? How can I fix you? How can I help, help enable you? It's really what it is. So understand that a huge part of the transformation for someone that is an empath or someone that is a people pleaser is realizing by pleasing other people, you are displeasing yourself. But also there is a payoff you get from pleasing other people. This is hard for some people to look at. What is the payoff you get? A payoff, like a benefit you get from pleasing people. You get to feel worthy, you get to feel validated, you get to feel like you help someone. There's a payoff there. That's why you do it. You get to feel good about yourself. See, I am a good person. I help people. I abandon aspects of myself to help people. But what you end up doing is you end up abandoning yourself in that process, and then you feel not pleased. So there's a martyrdom happening. So one of the biggest techniques I can recommend you do is you start to feel safe in your own body and you recognize other people's stuff as their stuff, not yours. And then when you see their stuff and they're feeling tension, you don't rush over to them to try to fix them because also by trying to fix them, you're implying they're broken. You're literally holding an image of them being broken into place and you're keeping them in that energy and you're doing a disservice to them. You want to empower other people to fix themselves because you fill up your own cup and you don't overextend yourself. Does that make sense? Feeling the separation. Now lean into tension. Lean into tension and lean into expression and realize it's not your job to mitigate other people's tension. That's one of the biggest breakthroughs. And see yourself also, here's another aspect of this, stop identifying as a people pleaser or an empath. And people say empath is a, empath can be a healthy trait. I'm not saying don't have empathy. I'm saying that very often the way people understand empaths is there's this like notion in the mind that an empath is someone that like feels people's energies so sensitively that they tune to people. I mean, that's like the extreme side of empath, I think. I think it's a natural ability that almost everyone has to be able to tune into other people. Almost everyone has, not everyone obviously, but nonetheless, the key is the balance of that. But when people say, that they are a people pleaser or that they are an empath, that is an identity that many people can get stuck in. How about the moment you stop pleasing other people and you stop making it your responsibility, your job, you're no longer a people pleaser. You're just a person whose job is not to please other people. You can, like, you can choose that. You can stop being that at any moment. The pattern may come back and you become aware of the pattern. So let go of the identity. Someone says, I am a self-pleaser. There you go. A pleaser. Pleaser is like a job almost. It's like a burden. It's like a responsibility. When you're present to the moment, you're not caught up. So how do you sign up? You just type in Shift and I'll send you the link. It's at 8 o'clock Pacific Standard Time, 11 o'clock, whatchamacallit, Eastern Time. Let's look at another question. What are your thoughts on timeline to manifesting the physical things? You know, it's interesting. I've made a lot of YouTube videos in the past on manifestation, and I do believe there's a correlation obviously between what you think and what you experience. And I believe that beliefs create reality, but I believe so much that what's more important is who you are being. It's realizing that the external physical things are a reflection of your internal state of consciousness and who you are being. So because of that, I lean away a lot. I don't even, sometimes I'm aware of myself, of how I judge myself for the kind of content I used to make. Like there's content that I used to make on YouTube that had certain, like very back in the day, like I'm talking, I've been making YouTube videos since 2017, but there's definitely like a judgment that I have towards like the past part of myself that I have to become aware of because then sometimes I'll see people in, I'll see people on like Instagram and stuff that reflect that energy back to me and I'll feel triggered. I'll feel like judgy. And one of the reasons I'm being judgy is because I'm judging my past self because I've been there. Like I've been in the past, I've been the person that went through a spiritual awakening that became very ungrounded. I've been someone in the past that focused on the whole starseed galactic thing, but no longer do I identify with that. And in fact, I see that I judge my past self for that sometimes because I feel like that was an ungrounded part of myself that I can see was looking for significance or to feel special, to feel like I had information other people don't have, or to feel like there's an awakening happening on the planet and so many people are still asleep. Look at all the sheeple walking around That's a way of creating grandiosity, being like, I'm better than everybody. All these sleep fricking people walking around in the matrix, NPCs. It's a way of experiencing grandiosity. Now I'm not saying that's what you're doing, this who's asking the question by the way, but what I'm saying is, so manifesting for me is like, I envisioned the part of me that was like, you're gonna manifest in 17 seconds or less because of the technique that Abraham Hicks talks about or some shit, right? But the way that I view it is like, I am a proponent of taking action and thinking and feeling it. I'm not saying don't visualize what you want. I'm not saying don't feel it, but also be the version of you now of what you want to experience in your life, but also not thinking that once you have the physical things, once you have the external manifestation, then life's gonna be perfect and you're gonna feel great. So I think for myself, so the timeline, okay, so like if you're focused on a timeline for manifesting physical things, it's like the timeline at all is focused on the end result, right? 'Cause it's like, how much time do I have to do this before I can have this? And then once I have this, then I'll feel happy. And what I'm saying is focus more on who you're being and get lost in the craft get lost into a flow state and focus on the presence, focus on the state of consciousness, and then what'll happen is time will go, time won't even be a thing. Like when you're in a flow state, time goes by so fast. You'll be like, oh, of course. And then it'll be natural for you. So my thoughts, so I know that was kind of a tangent, but yeah, sometimes I definitely judge, my past self. And if I'm aware that anytime I feel myself being judgy towards someone, that's like represents certain aspects that I've been, I'm aware that that trigger is happening in me. Does that make sense? But sometimes I think with mani— I mean, it isn't the most positive thing to talk about, of course, but when you think of manifestation, often when you think of spirituality in general, sometimes the thing that does trigger me is that it sometimes is a grandiosity play. It can be, not always. Like grandiosity in the sense like, I am so spiritual, I am so this. And I think what happens is, and I'm not talking smack on anyone specifically watching this, I'm recognizing this pattern inside of myself and especially in the past. but it's almost like in the past there was this part of me that was like a, almost like a significance wound where it's like, I wanna be seen. If people can see value in me because I can make videos that get hundreds of thousands of views and impact people in a positive way, and if my DMs could be flooded with people thanking me for making my videos, I will then be enough. But is it really enough or is it also looking like I wanna be better than people? But in spirituality, sometimes there's this like, I'm in 5D consciousness. All these people are asleep on the planet doing these 3D activities. The moment you get into 3D to 5D, like recognition, it's like higher vibration, low vibration. It's judgment. So I think a very powerful thing to do when it comes to spirituality is not to think in terms of hierarchy, which is funny, right? Because I have like a 3-day raise your vibration challenge. But part of raising your vibration is embracing and feeling uncomfortable emotion. It's not just thinking better thoughts. But also spirituality isn't, no one is high, it's not like, I think everyone's natural vibration is love, joy, and peace. And the attachments keep people kind of underneath the surface. But when you let go, you naturally raise back up. So no one technically at their core is higher vibrational than anyone. It's just some people may feel stuck, some people may feel attached, and that's what's keeping them in lower vibrational states of consciousness. Does that make sense? So anyways, like I said, like with this whole judging thing of spirituality, where I'm judging past versions of myself It's like, I also recognize it's all happening in me. Like the judgments I have are judgments I have because it's in my energetic field. I was talking to a friend about this recently that has a YouTube channel. And he said that sometimes when he's making videos, because for years he made videos that were kind of like all about a certain like astrology and certain things, it's like he feels resistance because he's judging his past self. So what I was helping him do was look at, do you feel drained making YouTube videos because there's a subconscious judgment onto your followers and onto the past version of you? Or are you just not passionate about it as much anymore? That's the self-inquiry. And what he realized is maybe if I think about this differently, I'll have more energy towards it. And there's just no pressure. Yeah, you just have to take off the pressure as well. See, I mean, I even judged this. I judged this question right now, which I'm aware is This energy's inside of me, right? But it says, is it really possible to attract a lottery win through feeling the winner? So this was a part of me back in the day where it was like, can you win things? Can you manifest winning the lottery? How cool would that be? But what I recognize is that I'm aware of that judgment inside of myself. But that also, my answer to that is if that's the question, that's the wrong question to ask. It's not the wrong question to ask, it's a legit question, but winning the lottery is like, what is the belief? Is the belief that when you win the lottery, what's gonna happen? Like that's the question you wanna ask yourself. Why do you wanna win the lottery? And do you really want to win the lottery? Question that. Because when people say they wanna win the lottery, okay, let's look at that. Like 80, 90% of people that win the lottery, go into debt, lose all the money, and go into depression or get addicted to drugs. It's like a majority of people that win the lottery. So do you really wanna win the lottery? And you say, no, Aaron, I'm gonna be that 10% that doesn't do it because I'm gonna meditate and all this stuff. Okay, whatever. But what I'm saying is one of the reasons people who win the lottery don't hold onto the money is because they haven't become the part of, they haven't become the version of themselves that it's natural for them to have that level of abundance. That what happens if someone from the hood or something wins $100 million and then everyone is reaching out to them for money, they probably don't know how to set boundaries. They probably feel like they don't deserve the money or they feel responsible for everyone in their family and everyone in their environment, in their neighborhood. So what do they then do? They then give it away. Maybe they don't have it. They maybe don't take tax, they don't pay their taxes on it and then they lose it. All right, so they haven't become the person where it's natural for them to have won the lottery. So when you become aware of that, it's like, what do you really want? Do you really want everyone at your doorstep? You would probably, if you won the lot, if you won $100 million or a billion dollars, you would probably be in like the Justin Bieber energy where like I imagine Justin Bieber probably has a hard time connecting with people because everyone that sees him does not see him. Let's all cry about it. But people don't really see him. They see what the symbol he represents. They see him as an opportunity. They see him as someone they can get a little bit of his attention and energy for. They see him as somebody they could probably pitch their business idea to. You see? Everyone wants something from him. So if you win the lottery, do you really wanna win the lottery? If you win the lottery, everyone probably is gonna want something from you. I could tell for sure the more successful I've become, the more almost acceptable it is for certain people to ask for things or to expect things. 'Cause you have this, can you just give to me? Do you really want it? Or do you wanna become the kind of person that naturally, like, here's one thing I recognize. If I would've won the lottery in 2016 before I went daily on YouTube in 2017, you wanna know one thing I'd almost guarantee you? I may not be making YouTube videos. I may not be doing my passion. Maybe there's a small, small chance that I would've won the lottery and been like, okay, this money is so boring. I just wanna do what I want now. Now I'm gonna go, just make videos and do live events? Maybe, but maybe not. So winning the lottery, do you really want to win the lottery? Maybe, maybe not. Maybe you win the lottery and then you say, no, Aaron, I'm going to be one of the 10% that doesn't get addicted to drugs. I'm going to be the— so I'm just going to set ninja boundaries. And the times people do okay when they win the lottery, by the way, is when they give their money to like a financial advisor or financial counselors or whatever to manage their money because they haven't become the kind of person that knows how to manage that. So they just give it to other people. They give it to someone that's professional at that. And then they kind of like give themselves only like, let's say they can afford $50,000 a month the rest of their life because of the money they've made. Then they're given that and then they can do whatever the hell they want with that. Someone says, how do you deal with family and friends that ask for money when they know you have money? So I've had to learn from this because it can be hard, especially like I'm the oldest sibling in my family. And there's been times in the past where I feel like it was my job to like help everyone in the family or kind of like fix certain situations. And what I've learned is that giving money does not fix situations. Empowering people to figure out their situations is more, it's like you can give someone fish or you can teach them how to fish. It's kind of like that example. Now, what you wanna be aware of within yourself is do you feel responsible for family and friends or guilty because you have money? Like all because you have money, does that mean that you have to like give it to everybody else? Is that what that means? Does it mean it's your responsibility to fix people in your life or to enable people in your life? This is a self-inquiry practice, by the way. I'm not telling you what the answer is, but I recognized in myself in the past, I was giving because I felt responsible and that would just lead to more and more of it. I was enabling a pattern. Instead of reflecting. So some people, if you don't give your money to family and friends and they expect you to do it because you have money, there will be some resistance there. But understand that that resistance is their resistance, not yours. If it's a conditional relationship where family and friends only really accept you if you are overgiving, or abandoning yourself in the process, then guess what? You're gonna feel like, like if that, then that's a conditional relationship. That's not even real love. And what if the real way you can love someone else is by empowering them and not enabling them? Makes sense? So how do you deal with them? You set boundaries if you need to. It's real simple, by the way. Anytime you're setting a boundary with someone, In your mind, there's this whole story. I'm gonna set this boundary, they're not gonna like it, we're gonna get into like an argument or a fistfight or some crazy story. And if you take away the story and somebody asks you for something and it doesn't feel authentic to give it or to go according to what they said, all you have to say is no. No, it's like one word, no. And then just remain firm in your frame and in your body. No. And what'll happen is stuff may come up for them. You just hold your frame and you're present. It's like really simple. But then the story is, I'm gonna say no and then I'm gonna feel a certain way. I'm gonna have to argue with them and then convince them. You don't have to do, you can just say no. You can say no with no explanation too. It's simple. So if you don't wanna play that game, you don't have to. You can just say no. So how do you deal with family that expects money from you when you don't wanna give it or you, you know, obviously you're asking for a question? You could just say no. Now, if you feel like you need to overexplain yourself, you need to explain to them, well, just so you know, I worked really hard for this and I have a thing in my life I'm focused on I'm trying to save and do that. You don't have to say any of that. You just say no. See, this is, this is another question that I judge, but I'm recognizing the judgment is in me, right? Someone says, Aaron, do you want to be a shepherd to and guide the lost sheep? 8 billion people, 144,000 shepherds, light starseeds, light warriors. That's what I was talking about earlier. The sheep of all the people that are asleep. I'm one of the 144,000 special lightworkers. I feel very special. So I don't buy into that ideology anymore. I used to though. Let me say this, I used to kind of be like that back in 2012, but now I, I do my best not to judge it because I recognize that I used to be there. But what I'm saying is is I don't have that perspective. Even a lot of times you can look at certain conspiracy theories and stuff. I try not to get lost down those because what happens is you get lost down those, what belief system are you developing about reality? I can't trust, all this crazy stuff is happening, and it kind of becomes a loop where it's, yes, I'm sure there definitely is some conspiracy theories I think are true. Some of them that are just far out there, like the whole flat earth thing. For me, that's kind of far out there, okay? Sometimes you look at one story on Instagram and it'll just bring you a whole bunch of others. And there's like people that have whole Instagram accounts about like the ice wall, 'cause there's an ice wall and there's like, we're being kept from understanding that beyond the Arctic, there's like green pastures and there's an ice wall. And I'm like, I watch this stuff 'cause it looks like it's something from Game of Thrones or something like that, like the ice wall from Game of Thrones. But then I realize people are serious about it. And I'm thinking, what kind of portal did you go down when it comes to the YouTube algorithm? Because the YouTube algorithm is you pay attention to it and then it'll send you more of whatever you're focused on. So people, I think, just get caught up in these things and then 6 months later they're like, the ice wall, we gotta make it beyond the ice wall. And that becomes like the life purpose is making it beyond the ice wall. And I'm saying this right now, maybe I'm judging it a little bit, But there are people that really believe this. There's probably people listening to this right now that might comment and be like, screw you, Aaron, flat earth is real. Okay, personally, I think you just got caught up in a— it's good to question reality, I guess. I'm not saying it's bad. I'm not— I'm not saying it's bad. It's good to question reality. But I'm just saying, to each their own. But what I'm saying is, what was my point with that? Kind of went on a tangent. But once again, it's the idea is that like people are asleep, the world is messed up because we've been held back from the understanding that we live in a petri dish or something, you know, like These, these come with these theories are like these beliefs that like everything is screwed and it keeps people in like a very much a kind of almost a victim consciousness. Let's see. Hmm. So anyways, I have a session here in about 10 minutes with my shadow work coach. So anyways, the Miami live event is February 22nd, 23rd here in Miami in Coconut Grove. And, uh, If you want to join, the word is Vortex, V-O-R-T-E-X. There are both virtual tickets and in-person tickets. In the future, by the way, I may not be doing as many virtual events with the in-person tickets. I'm going on tour soon. I'll be doing 1-day events, 2-day events, and different, you know, as I go on tour. However, they probably won't be virtual. So if you do want a virtual ticket at a 2-day experience, there will be a lighter version of breathwork. There will be a lot of live hot seat coaching, taking a life of their own. You can respond VORTEX for the in-person Miami event or the virtual tickets. There's virtual ticket as well. And other than that, I think that is it for now. Um, I'm gonna get ready for my next call. If you want me to do more lives, let me know. What you can do is you can screenshot this and you could post on your story and tell me what you thought of this live. Was it fun? Was it insightful? Was it triggering you? Is there, what's going on, huh? What are you feeling? Anyways, other than that, I think that's it for now. I'll talk to you on the next one. As always, peace, much love, and namaste. I'll come to Europe eventually. Now, if you wanna learn step by step how to apply the frame technique to feel safe in your own reality, to feel confident in your own frame, then I show step by step in a free YouTube video how to apply the frame technique. It's a guided meditation process where I explain it along the way. It's a meditation that is very easy to do, requires no meditation experience. So if you want to check out that video, I'm gonna go ahead and put the frame technique right here. Welcome to the frame technique meditation and activation.