The #1 Hidden Block to Attracting More Love, Money and Abundance (how to remove it)
In this video Aaron Doughty explains that the primary obstacle preventing people from manifesting love, money, and abundance is a mental construct he calls the "story gap" – the narrative we tell ourselves about why we are not already living our desired reality. He argues that our inner self‑image, formed by past experiences and core wounds, drives a belief‑feeling‑thought‑action‑result loop that keeps us stuck. Drawing on Psycho‑Cybernetics, quantum physics, and Dr. Joe Dispenza, he describes how limiting beliefs (e.g., unworthiness, abandonment, distrust) create a self‑fulfilling reality. Doughty illustrates the concept with personal anecdotes about his 9‑to‑5 job, a conflict with his assistant, and childhood trauma from an ex‑step‑mom, showing how the need to be right reinforces old stories. He emphasizes that awareness of these stories is 90 % of transformation and recommends meditation (inner‑child, self‑image, love meditations) as a practical method to rewrite the narrative and align with the desired version of oneself. The video concludes with a call to download free guided meditations and a teaser for a related video on letting go.
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This video is going to address the number one block that most people have in their lives that are keeping them from really stepping into a new version of themselves. One of the quotes that I heard a long time ago that I found to be true is that in life, you don't necessarily get that which you want, but you always get in life a reflection of who you are being. And this explains a lot because whatever we want, we automatically lack. If I want that over there, I'm saying that over there isn't here. If someone really wants a relationship, it's because they're not in a relationship. If somebody wants to be doing what they love full-time, it's because they're not already doing it. Now, the key to transformation that I have learned that has completely transformed my own life is what I'm going to be sharing with you in this video. The number one block to you stepping into this new version of you, and step by step how you can do it that will completely transform your life the way that it had been mine back in 2017. And in this video, I'm going to show you exactly how to do that. I'm going to be sharing with you that block, what is called the story gap. I call it the story gap, and this is something that I've learned not only from my own experience but from reading different personal development concepts and mixing it also with spirituality. There's a book called Psycho-Cybernetics. Psycho-Cybernetics is a book that was written by a guy that was a doctor for that of plastic surgery. And he noticed that anytime his clients would come and they'd get something on their face fixed or on their body fixed, unless they changed their inner self-image, they would not feel any different or many times they wouldn't even think that they look different because what he realized is we all have an inner self-image. This inner self-image is on autopilot and every single one of us are living in alignment with this inner self-image. We are thinking equal to that self-image. We are feeling emotions equal to that identity, that version of us, and we are taking action equal to that version of us. Now, the missing key and the block for so many people is that they're focused on thinking, they're focused on what they wanna create in their life. And even, you know, over here, this is how reality works. This is something that you could study many ancient texts for this, but our beliefs create our reality. Whatever you believe to be true is being reflected back to you. So this right here is the cycle. We have belief, whatever we believe to be true, then creates that and generates a feeling Based on that feeling, we then feel and think thoughts that are equal to that feeling. Those thoughts then may propel us to take action or not to take action, which then gets us a certain result, which then fuels and reaffirms the initial belief. So if we believe that we're not worthy to live our full-time, like maybe to live and do what we love full-time, we may then settle for a reality where we are working a 9-to-5 job we hate. That's what I did for like 10 years. Or it's a job I hated. I thought similar to that reality, I felt emotions similar to that reality, and I took action similar to that reality. How'd I take action similar to that reality? I went to a job. I went to the 9-to-5 job every 5 days a week, and I bitched about it, I complained to my coworkers and friends that I didn't wanna be there, but my reality was directly equal to that. So the key to changing your reality is becoming aware of your beliefs and the blocks that people have that keep them are what keep them in their current reality. Now there's something called the story gap. And I believe that if you understand this one idea, this will completely change your life and it'll show you the missing key to why you may get the same results over and over again. You ready for it? All right. So this is it. The story gap. The only thing that is holding you back from experiencing your dream reality is the story that you tell yourself about why you aren't there already or why you're not worthy of it, or that pretty much the story that's keeping you in your current reality. Now, here's something I've learned from Joe Dispenza. Here's something I've learned from other ancient teachings is that there's an infinite number of potential realities that exist. This is what quantum physics shows us. There's infinite potential, and that means there's many different versions of you. There's a version of you that's already living in your full-time job that you love, or working for yourself. There's a version of you that's already in a happy relationship. The only reason that's not a part of your reality is because that's not part of your story. That is, the story that you currently have is keeping you locked in your current reality. So the story that you might have may be, and why do we keep on and hold onto these stories? Because these stories are very familiar. They're very comfortable. And even though, and sometimes I think as well, it's like those stories help us to feel right. They help to justify our own past, to justify why we are where we are. When I had that 9 to 5 job, I told myself that story, like I don't wanna be working here, but I am working here. I would rather be doing what I love, but I got like almost fueled and in a way, like by being angry about it, it was justifying why I was where I was. And also there were some positive payoffs. Anything we do is 'cause there's some sort of payoff. One of the dirtiest payoffs is the need to be right. We wanna be right. I just experienced this actually just a couple of minutes ago with actually my assistant. She does a great job at what she does and she takes care of so many different levels of my life, you know, my personal life and, you know, so I can focus on my business and stuff like that. But one thing she takes care of is she takes care of and she pays my bills and all that. She makes sure that like everything's taken care of because at one point I like, 7, 2012, I went through a spiritual awakening and I became very kind of ungrounded and my credit got completely tanked because I was becoming so spiritual that I thought money and everything just doesn't matter, right? So for 7 years my credit was like screwed and then I got on top of everything and now I have like amazing credit and everything. But basically one thing that my assistant does is she makes sure that all my bills are paid. Well, these last like week, I've gotten like 2 or 3 different like notices that there's something that like needs to be paid or something like that. Some bills, I just moved into this new house, like some bill that needs to be paid. And I get from that, seeing those things, I got triggered because I'm like, wait, you're supposed to be taking care of this. And I kind of came at her like, you're not doing this, you need to do it. If you're not gonna do it, I'm gonna do it. I was kind of a dick about it. And I realized that What was happening is I was being stubborn as well. She actually did do it. For some reason, they sent the notices like this is the last attempt or something like that, even though it was on autopay. It was like this weird thing. But I could tell that I had this addiction to being right in the situation where I was like, I shouldn't have to like see these second notice things and stuff like that. Are you doing your job correctly? And even though I know she is doing her job correctly, it was an interesting thing, but I could tell. That I wanted to be right, 'cause she kind of got triggered and was like, "Hey, before you blame me for this, like ask me or something," you know? So there's this interesting thing between us, but what I realized for myself was that I was, I'm addicted to, in a way, being right, and also maybe even addicted to an old story. And I'll talk about this in a minute, an old story that comes from childhood. Because back in childhood, I always had somebody, my ex-stepmom, at least from 7 to 15 years old. And many of you know the story, but she was very manipulative. She was very controlling. She was like, I couldn't really trust her. There was no way I could trust her. And I think what happens is I developed a story that said that I can't trust people. I have to do everything myself if I want to be taken care of. And therefore there's like a block there when it comes to trusting people. So it's an interesting dynamic that I'm realizing in my own life in some ways that I have to become aware of and I have to let go of the payoff of being right because that payoff to be right will keep us in a reality that is unpreferable. And I've had experiences even over the last year where I've hired people to work on my house that something happens and it's like I couldn't trust them or, Even something just recently, I had my windows tinted on my car and this guy came and did it. He did two, he did my two cars. I have two cars and he did one car, did it well, had him do the second car. When he did it, he put, I have this like gym sticker. This is the sticker that gets me into the gym parking lot here in Austin. And he left the sticker on and tinted over it. And I'm like, what the hell? Like, why did— I need to put the registration there. Like registration in Texas goes on the front windshield. And I need to get him to redo that. 'Cause for some reason he put tint over a sticker, a temporary sticker. And there's this guy ended up freaking out on my assistant and stuff like that because we asked for him to come and redo that part of it. And it was this interesting thing where maybe I had this belief that I can't trust or this belief in like, that there's like that resistance that I have to deal with. And it's an interesting thing because there's, until that belief has changed, I'll continue to experience these little incongruities that are there. And the key to this is becoming aware of the belief, becoming aware of it. 90% of all transformation is awareness. It's awareness. I think I said that funny kind of. Awareness is 90% of transformation. Once you become aware of the old story, you then stop identifying with it as a part of reality. So instead of like, oh, I can't trust people, I have to do everything myself, or there's gonna be these hiccups that happen, instead of that story, it's like, can I let go of that? Even though that story may be very consistent from childhood. So the key to this is realizing as well that anytime we look at our stories from the past, What quantum physics shows us is that we take the memory out of our memory bank, we look at it, we change that memory, and we put it back in the memory bank. And by the time we've thought of something 1,000 times, 10,000 times, 20 times, whatever, we've changed it over and over again with a story. We overlay a story to actually what happened, and that story that we play over it then becomes a part of our identity. So part of, and most of our past isn't even actually what happened, is our story, our interpretation of what happened. And we know this too, because you could get some people that 10 people see a car accident and you could interview them immediately afterwards. You get like 10 different stories about what happened. Crazy, sometimes it's like the car came out of this direction and then somebody said, no, it came out of this direction. It's like, it's crazy how much our own experience of reality. We develop these stories that then keep us tracked into similar patterns. Why? Because we want to be right. There's reasons, and that keeps us entrained in this reality. But this is the thing to know, and this is a lot of what Dr. Joe Dispenza talks about. The past is not equal the present. We are living in our past. And really what we're doing is we're living in the old meaning. We've given things meaning in the past. I'm not worthy of a loving relationship. Maybe that first loving relationship was our relationship with our parents. Someone's going to abandon me. I can't trust. And those beliefs are on autopilot. And what happens is because they're on autopilot, it keeps us trapped in that old past reality. The past does not equal your present. The past isn't even really a thing that exists. There's many, there's an infinite number of pasts that you could connect to. And that's why one of the most powerful things you could do is to learn meditation, which isn't really something you'd learn, it's just something you, you be present to the moment, you become aware of the stories that you're telling yourself, the stories that you have in your life that are keeping you trapped in your current reality, and then you make a choice and you start to be a new version of you, a more authentic version of you. That's it. That's as simple as transformation is. Become aware of the story. There's a gap between the current story you're telling yourself to the belief and the reality you want to live in. But you have to become aware of that story first. And you have to be aware that most of us are living in the past because we're living based on old meanings. There's a meaning we have to the past. There's a meaning we have to who we are. And most of us, by the way, there's core stories that we have. And most of the core stories we have are one of three different stories, either the abandonment wound. We're afraid people are gonna leave us. We're afraid that if we're not good enough, that people may leave us, or we're afraid of being rejected. That's also a part of the abandonment wound. Some of you may be people pleasers. If you're a people pleaser, a lot of people that go through spiritual awakening are people that are considered empaths. They can feel other people's energy very strongly. And one of the reasons they've done that is because it's a form of survival mechanism. Most likely when you were a kid, if you're an empath, you went through some type of trauma or some type of experience where you gained survival and safety off tuning to someone else. And if you could then get their validation or their love or their approval, then you would feel safe. But it's literally looking on the external for something that can only be found on the internal. And a lot of times people that have the abandonment wound abandon themselves in the process of making others happy. Why? Because when they were kids, it's like, it's okay if my needs aren't met, as long as I make mom or dad happy, they'll give me validation and then I'll be okay. So in relationships now, they will abandon themselves to get validation or approval to then feel safe and happy when the key is actually to stop abandoning the self and to start in a way giving yourself that validation. There's the worthiness and shame wound where we think we're broken. We have this belief that there's something wrong with me. I had to shed that. A lot of it can also be tied to this as well, but worthiness, if we believe we aren't worthy, then we'll find somebody in relationship that reflects the fact that we're, or the fact, the belief that we're unworthy. And then the last one's can't trust, having to control everything in our life. Those are like the 3 core wounds. A lot of times people will see a parent that cheated on someone else, someone broke trust with them, somebody abused them. Sexually, physically, and then it's like, I can't trust. And that will then cause, not like, when I look at me not being able to trust, I can see that it probably had to do with the ex-stepmom quite a bit of it. Some of it could be because my dad allowed my ex-stepmom in my life and didn't protect my brother and I. There could be that, you know, I love my dad, but I can definitely say I had that passivity. And that passivity, by the way, for my dad comes from his own abandonment wound from his dad who was an alcoholic. Who wasn't really there. And my dad is a strong people pleaser, nice guy. So anyways, the thing that I would focus on instead, and I'd highly recommend you look into, is who are you being in this present moment? Who are you? Do you believe that you are your past? That— because these things are what keeping you inside that reality. And if you didn't know as well, I have 3 free meditations. These are the most powerful meditations that I have. They're completely free. You can go to aarondoughty.com/free or click the link below. They're the inner child meditation for healing the core story, the self-image meditation for changing your self-image, and a love meditation for feeling self-love. These are meditations, some of which have over 4 million views on YouTube. These you can listen to, no ads or anything. And all you do is you go to aarondoughty.com/free Check those out, download them, listen to them for 21 days, watch how it begins to change your life. And this is really the key of what have changed my life the most over, you know, I had to let go of having ADHD, the story I told myself about having a lot of energy and ADHD, the story about my painful past, and it kept attracting women into my life that were similar to that past that I left. Once you change your stories about who you are, you can then be the version of you that is empowered. And that's really what changes everything. If you wanna learn the 5 secrets to letting go that will make you attractive AF, that's this video right here. Highly recommend that you watch it 'cause it'll help you with what you learned in this video. The less attached you are, the more attractive you are. People are attracted to somebody that is in their own frame and doesn't need you.
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