In this self‑help video Aaron Doughty explains that the single biggest reason people fail to attract love is the unconscious replication of parental and early‑life attachment patterns, which create limiting beliefs about worthiness and cause a low‑frequency vibrational state. He shares personal stories of growing up with an abusive step‑mom, parental divorce, and how those dynamics led him to repeatedly attract controlling or emotionally unavailable partners. By becoming aware of these inherited patterns, filling the internal void with self‑love, and shifting one’s internal frequency, a person can develop magnetic energy that naturally draws loving relationships. Aaron outlines practical steps: examine your parents’ relationship and your own childhood beliefs, recognize attachment styles (avoidant, anxious, codependent), set stronger boundaries, and re‑program self‑worth. He promotes additional resources—a free hour‑long Q&A with relationship expert Matt that delves deeper into attachment patterns, and a popular guided meditation designed to cultivate internal love over 21 days. The video concludes with a call to action to use these tools, subscribe, and continue the personal‑growth journey.
Chapters
If you find that you are not attracting love into your life, there's one main reason that is. And if you fix this one thing, or if you go within and realize this one thing, then everything begins to shift for you. It's like everything locks into place. You feel more in alignment and you naturally start to see a new reflection in your life. You have more magnetic energy. You find that you don't repel that which you want, you feel like you're also not so attached to the outcome. Like whatever happens happens because there's this trust within you. And in this episode or video, what I want to do is show you what that number one reason is that you're not attracting love and how to change around that energy dynamic so that in a way there's more magnetic energy there so that it comes to you. This was pivotal. This is key. This is what exactly, and what I did and was completely transformed my own life. Welcome back to another video. My name is Aaron and I help people expand their consciousness. Now recently I just got done doing a live Q&A with a buddy of mine who is a dating and relationship expert, and when we were doing this I had a lot of epiphanies about my own love life. I had a lot of epiphanies about myself, and a lot of this has to do with understanding a couple things about our patterns, understanding our patterns and our beliefs about our identity, about who we are. And we'll find that unless we check these things, these things remain on autopilot. These things remain, we continue to attract the same things over and over again. And many of you that know my story know that from 7 to 16 years old, I had the abusive stepmom in my life. Well, after that abusive stepmom left when I was 15 and my dad divorced her, I kept attracting the same type of person into my life, somebody that was trying to control me because that felt safe and familiar to me. I didn't understand that it was something I was doing unconsciously. So my first girlfriend was jealous and controlling. After I broke up with her, I had a manager that was that same personality as my ex-stepmom. After I did the inner work, she left my life, but there was still this certain, like almost narcissist, My ex-stepmom is a narcissist, is a narcissist. Luckily I don't have to see her anymore, but it's a similar pattern that kept reflecting itself in my life until I did what I'm gonna share with you in this video. So realize that all this comes down to this understanding as well. What we attract into our life, this is a funny thing. How can we attract love? Well, what we feel, what we think, our beliefs about who we are, is something we feel and then we are attracting in reality a mirror reflection of that. So you can't really attract the mirror into you. The key is to first off fill the void, fill the beliefs and the patterns and let go of the old beliefs and patterns so that you change your frequency. Realize there is a frequency where you are in a loving relationship. There's a frequency where you realize your own sense of self-worth and that vibrational frequency then has within it you tuning to a reality that has that as a natural reflection. So this is really about shifting our internal frequency to then attract love. Attracting love is not something— that's like the outside. I wanna attract that out there from in here, but really you're resonating at a frequency of love and then the outer reflection naturally reflects that. You see the difference? So when I looked at what made the biggest change for me, and what the epiphanies I was having with my own patterns and beliefs in relationships was me becoming aware of my own parental patterns that I had. Now, what we tend to do is we tend to recreate the parental pattern. So the parents, our parents growing up, how did we respond to our parents? What were the dynamics between our parents? What beliefs did we create about our parents that then we took on as our own that then was on autopilot. So what I did is there was a certain, you know, my parents divorced when I was 5 or 6. What I did is I took on certain patterns and I did my best to then in a way mitigate these patterns. It has to do with nurturing, has to do with masculine-feminine energy, has to do with attracting emotionally unavailable females into my life because of a familiar pattern that had to do with my ex-stepmom, that had to do with my parents. And that, and also having a strong feminine presence. So for example, my ex-stepmom was very dominant. She was very masculine. And I'd find that in my relationships, I would attract women that had a very strong frame in themselves 'cause that felt familiar to me. I was literally recreating my parental pattern, not even knowing it. And until I became aware of that parental pattern, it was on autopilot. Just recently, more than ever before, I've become more present. I'm sure you can maybe even feel it in this video. I'm more grounded than a lot of my other videos. I feel more present in my own energy. I'm not as caring what people think. That was a pattern that came from the parental pattern of being always in trouble, you see. So I was always kind of trying to be a people pleaser. Well, what I've recently done is I've become kind of like a dickhead, not in a bad way, but I've, I've obtained my own boundaries and I don't care what people think as much anymore at all. I'm more centered, I'm more centered in my own gravity. Because of that, I have more magnetic energy now. So the biggest thing that I'd like to encourage you to do is to look at your relationship with your parents and look at your parents' relationship with each other that they had. What are the beliefs and the patterns that you started to make about love? Is it that you maybe had an emotionally unavailable father? So now you tend to attract men that are emotionally unavailable. Same thing can happen with the mother. Could it be that you always had to prove yourself and that you've never given the validation from your parents? So now you find in love relationships, you're always trying to prove yourself. You're trying to see if you can give them a certain amount of love, then maybe you can feel worthy, whole, and complete. Do you feel codependent? In your relationships. Maybe you weren't given a certain amount of love when you were growing up, or your parents weren't able to be emotionally available for there. So that turned you into somebody that was searching for that love in the void. There was a void that was felt and you're trying to fill it with the relationship. You see, these are things to look at because the number one reason you aren't attracting love is because your patterns and your beliefs are telling you that you're not worthy, and you may be placing excess importance and excess energy on what other people think of you, on getting somebody else to come into your life, putting them on a pedestal. This is why the key is to fill the void with your own love and your own sense of worthiness. Now, something that, that live Q&A that I did with my buddy Matt was incredible, and it was one where there are a lot of epiphanies within myself. It was like about an hour long, and there were many people that also were having these big breakthroughs because he was showing the different patterns, the different parental patterns, the different attachment styles of avoidant, anxious, codependency, and it was making it very apparent to why these patterns may be in our own life. So if you want access to that, it's completely free. You can hit the top of the description box below. You can look at that training or watch that training, it's an hour-long training with my buddy Matt, but we go over all of this. But there was something that was very apparent to me is that all the outer reality is is a reflection. So the key is for us to then become aware of our own patterns, our own beliefs, and then we can literally change those patterns and beliefs by having awareness of them and then choosing something new. The next time you're on a date with somebody that's emotionally unavailable or somebody that's like trying to take your energy, maybe you can like have more boundaries. You can maybe see that pattern and then not go down, not, oh, like, oh, I'm attracted, this feels familiar, I'm gonna go for this. You could change that energy. So look at the parental, look at the parents that you had and the way of the dynamics of the energy and see what meanings you gave, how you took on that pattern and how that may be blocking you from feeling love or how that may have caused a void within you and then start to give yourself that emotion. And for more information on exactly how to do this or if you want to know what those parental patterns are and kind of get an inside look at that. You have the training below that Matt and I did, hour-long live Q&A that we did. It's a recording of that. It's a, uh, something that will show all of this to you and help you to move through it to become more secure so that you resonate with the frequency of love and then start to see that reflection on the outside. You'll see in the top description box below. Other than that, like this video if you guys liked it, subscribe if you haven't already. Um, there's also a meditation which is the most powerful meditation I've created. Created for attracting love. It's got over 2 or 3 million views and so many people claim that it's helped them to attract love. And really what it does is it helps you feel the internal love on the inside. All the outside is a reflection of the inside. Listen to that meditation for 21 days. Watch what happens. It'll be on the end card right here and in the top of the description box below as well. And other than that, I hope you guys enjoy this episode and I'll talk to you on the next one. Peace, much love, and namaste.
