The Vibration of a Control Freak and How to TRANSCEND it and TRUST the Universe
In this self‑help video Aaron Doughty explains why people become control‑freaks, how that pattern originates from past experiences of powerlessness, and how the ego’s drive to survive creates a vibration of control that oscillates between pain (when lacking control) and pleasure (when exerting control). He shares personal anecdotes—most notably his childhood under an over‑controlling ex‑step‑mom and his transition from a 9‑to‑5 shoe‑selling job to full‑time YouTube—to illustrate the pain‑control loop. Aaron maps this dynamic onto a hierarchy of vibrational states, from low‑frequency emotions (fear, survival) through mid‑frequency willingness and ego‑driven willpower, up to high‑frequency love, joy, peace, and enlightenment. Using a diving‑mask analogy (the ego as a scuba mask that supplies survival oxygen but should not be mistaken for the diver’s true self), he shows how over‑identifying with the ego leads to “cracking” the mask and suffering. The solution he proposes is heightened awareness of ego‑driven control, challenging the underlying belief‑systems, and consciously surrendering to the present moment and the higher self. He emphasizes stepping into the unknown, cultivating patience, and practicing a 21‑day “trust the universe” meditation to rewire the energetic field. The video’s purpose is to help viewers recognize unconscious control patterns, release them, and align with higher‑vibrational states through trust and surrender.
Chapters
This video, I'm going to show you the vibration of a control freak, show you how to transcend it, and reveal to you the illusion of the ego's sense of control. Welcome back to another video. My name is Aaron and I help people expand their consciousness. Now in this video, I'm going to be showing you the vibration of a control freak, showing you why you may be a control freak or you know someone that's a control freak. And when I say, and I do this video, just know I am somebody that definitely has gone through periods of where I like to control different aspects of my life. And there were many things, and you know, I went from somebody that was working a 9-to-5 job I wasn't passionate about to becoming successful on YouTube doing what I love. And there's been moments where I realized that at that moment I decided that I had to have this insane willpower, and the more I could control of everything, the better. Now I've learned a lot through this process. I'm not completely be, um, just go with the wind type thing. There are moments of when I go back and forth with this, but I've learned a lot about my own vibration in relation to being a control freak or, you know, controlling different aspects of my life. And even, you know, trying to help other people. There's been times where I'm like, oh, I want to help this person better their lives and, and trying to help them too much rather than letting them go through their own lessons. And sometimes I think a lot of us that are going through the spiritual awakening process will try to help people so much. And sometimes that kind of backfires on us because then we overextend ourselves. And by trying to control, we end up having them resist because whenever, whenever you're trying to control something, there's normally a rebellious type attitude. And I know that that's how it was with me. Now, the vibration of a control freak. Let's first off understand that we have our Ego right here. Now what happens is at a certain point in our past, our lives, if you consider yourself to be a control freak, someone that is controlling situations, trying to control outcomes, if that's the case for you or someone you know, that at a certain time in your past, you felt like you had no control, or let's just say, let's put on this, but no control. There was a certain point in your past when you had no control or you felt out of control. And when you felt out of control, you got pain. So for example, that was me. I had my ex-stepmom in my life between the ages of 7 to 15 years old. And in that period of my time, I didn't have much control over anything. I was being completely controlled by my ex-stepmom. My brother and I weren't allowed to go out and have friends. We were many times locked outside of the house and there were just chores and things that we had to do for 8 or 9 hours at a time. We'd be drinking water out of a hose. We weren't allowed to eat the kind of food that would sustain us. We were given a TV dinner at night and a bowl of cereal in the morning. We were both very skinny for being, I was 14, you know, at the end of it, I was 14 years old. My brother was like 11 and we had no control and that no control brought us pain because it was, we were completely controlled. Now the thing is, is in the moment of our past, we had no control. We got pain. Then what we did is we made a choice and that choice was after that pain that I'm going to control. So make it a choice to then con— control. So then what happens is we start to control different aspects of our life. So for me, for example, I eventually came to this conclusion, uh, when I was working that 9 to 5 job selling women's shoes that I wanted to do and be a full-time YouTuber. So I made the choice to completely start to control my willpower, to assert myself and to do what I'm passionate about and to really just become— I like, there was no other option. Like, I'm going to do this. And then guess what happened? Then I started to get pleasure I started to get pleasure with having control. So it's either these two things or a combination of both. You either get pain from having no control or you get pleasure from having control. So what happens is at a certain point in our past, this was decided, maybe at an unconscious level, we're not completely aware of it. And then what happens is there's a certain level of sense of I am in control. Just say I am, and it's the ego saying it though. The ego saying it because if the ego wasn't there to say that, then there'd be that no control, which would be the pain. So it's almost like the ego has to step in and at a certain point, this is how it works. Now, the reason I'm sharing this is because when we understand that this is why we're the control freak, we can then realize that there's no longer a reason to feel threatened. That past thing with my ex-stepmom's over. I don't have to assume that reality's always gonna be like that. I now am a full-time YouTuber. I do what I love. I don't have to assume that I'm gonna have to work a 9-to-5 job that I hate again. This is my reality now. So the threat is gone. However, there is a certain level of this control freak that is still there. Now let me show you another example and vibration of the control freak. Now this, I like using these. Let me know, like this video if you like these charts, by the way. I haven't done one of these charts in a while. Okay, I'm gonna do two. I haven't done them in a while, but actually I feel like I explain things very differently when I have them than when I don't, 'cause it's almost like I'm able to put it in my own, I'm able to like see it in my own mind as well. So we have the levels of consciousness here. Now at a certain level, let's say we have the fear, we have the lower vibrational emotions, right? Then eventually we have, let's say, willingness. We have love, joy, peace, enlightenment. So these are the different levels. Now what happens is when there was a certain level of no control, there was most likely negative emotion. So there's negative emotion there. That negative emotion caused us to feel that lower vibrational energy. Maybe it was the fear, maybe it was feeling like you couldn't survive and understand The ego's job is simply to help you to survive. That's it. The ego's job is to help you survive. And I have an analogy that I'm going to share with you in a minute as well for that. I'm going to write that here so I don't forget. Okay, so, so willingness right here. Now the willingness is that of, of the ego in a way. It's the willpower, the willpower to go in a certain way. So that is something that then gets to be built. So when we associate pain with not having control, we start to build control in our life, which is when we start to get pleasure. The realm of, I would say, the ego is the middle levels because even the intellectual ideas, the intellect of reasoning, which is like your beliefs create your reality, the reasoning, is building up the ego and the willingness, building up the ego and building up the ego to then move in a certain direction. In general, when we're in lower vibrational emotions, maybe what we need to do sometimes is to actually start to not to develop the ego, not to identify completely with the ego, but to let the ego in a way start to have more responsibility, start to have a little bit more because then it brings you out of the lower vibrational emotions. A lot of getting from the lower vibrational emotions into the mid vibrational emotions is about taking responsibility, which means the ability to respond, responsibility. So it's about getting to these mid levels of vibration. Now the thing is, is then to get from the mid levels into the high vibrations, you actually have to let go of the ego. You have to surrender the ego. So it's almost like there's a loss of ego and a loss of power in the lower vibrational emotions. Because we don't feel like we're worthy. And then we start to develop the control, we start to develop the ego, start to go in a certain direction, we start to have reasoning, the intellect. Then we're in the middle where we're building up the ego, and then we have to let go of the ego to get into the high vibrations. So the reason I share this, because now we can kind of see that we may build up the ego for a certain level of success, but then create things for us or help us in this process. Now here's the analogy, and I know my spelling's a little bit off. I haven't done one of these in a while. So this analogy I got from Bashar. If you guys haven't checked out Bashar, he's awesome. And this analogy has to do with understanding a diving mask. So imagine that we have a diving mask. Now imagine in the higher dimensional realms, let's get a little esoteric here. Imagine the higher dimensional realms. You have a higher self in the Law of One. They say your higher self is mid-sixth density. It's a little more esoteric there for you. And that's the Law of One material. You can check that out, the raw materials. Now what happens is we are in, let's say, the higher self or in the mid-sixth density. We project our consciousness here and think of it as our ego, like a diving mask. Let's say this is like some type of diving mask. Like that's our head or whatever. That's the diving mask though. Now the diving mask and the job of the diving mask with the, um, the scuba, you know, the snorkeling, the snorkeling, the snorkeling equipment is to help you to survive. You're underwater right now and you have this scuba mask or this snorkeling mask that gives you air so that you can survive. Now that's the job of the ego to help you to survive. Now what happens is as we go down into the murky waters, We then start to assume that our mask and our scuba snorkeling is us rather than knowing that we are connected and it's a tool. It's something we use to survive. We start to identify with the snorkeling scuba mask and equipment that's supplying us oxygen, that's helping us to survive. And what happens is then there's times when we start to then think that the scuba snorkeling mask is us. And we may even go into murky waters. Things may get a little bit scary, but rather than trusting the process, we try to remove, we try to remove it in a certain way. We end up cracking it because we mess around with it too much. And the point of that is that then trying to thinking that this is supposed to guide us. This is not supposed to guide us. The snorkeling mask does not guide us. The higher mind guides us. We can trust in— we can trust in the process of us directing where we need to go through our higher mind and trust that the ego would do its job to help us to survive. But the problem is we then get into the murkiness when we start to assume that the scuba snorkeling mask, whatever we call it, is meant to help direct us in our life. So that's when pain starts to come. That's when we may get a little bit antsy. We may start to move it around and then crack it. And then we're supposed to get up very fast, but we're a little bit too deep. And if we were to do that, it could be very painful and it could be very dangerous. So the moral of this is understanding that this scuba snorkeling mask thing is just to help you survive. The sense of control, and look at this from the past, and when we decided we got pain from no control, is our ego is trying to survive. This is all about survivalness. And trying to survive. When we realize that the ego is just doing its job to helping us survive, we can then realize that what got us there isn't gonna get us to the next level. And that's what I've been learning lately. What got me to where I'm at today is not gonna get me to the next level. I have to let go of that control, bring a little more grace into my life, trust the process. So the vibration, I mean, think about this as well. So if we have the ego, and the, the sense of control freak. Think about if we have all of these rules, which is what a lot of times the ego does, is the ego is reinstating rules. I have to use many different papers because this paper is really thin and I have the other paper I'm going to put on for tomorrow's video. It's way better. So rules. So the ego has many rules when it's a control freak. It says people need to act this way. People act a certain way. It needs to say that things, how I want it to happen, how I want, in the way I want. So all of these rules. Now imagine the more rules you have, the less you can feel positive emotion. If your rules are people have to treat you a certain way, people need to take their own initiative in their own life. You need to have things be a certain way on the outside, which is then projecting out your own happiness because things need to happen on the outside a certain way for you to internally be happy, then all of these rules end up causing us to stay in the lower vibrational emotions. So the key to this whole process and everything I'm sharing with you today is simply becoming aware of it. Awareness is normally 95% of the process. Because now that you could see that you may have just had this meaning, this time that you decided this is who you were, that's what then kept you in that lower vibrational emotion. But then now that you can see that this is outdated, and now what you can do is you can focus on other things. What is the solution to this? What is the solution to this? Become aware of it every time the ego is trying to assert its own dominance, becoming aware of any time the ego is trying to control things and then stepping back and then saying, it's okay, I can trust this to work out the right way. Challenge that belief system as well. Challenge the belief that comes up, goes, oh, it's supposed to happen this way. I've been doing this recently and it does work. It really does. All you have to do is observe these things as it comes up, to observe the ego sense of control, and then to be okay and to understand this as well. Magic happens. A lot of times people can— that have this control freak mentality or trying to control things are afraid of new things and of trying new things because it's less certain. Now the thing I'd encourage you to do is to step into the unknown because in the unknown is where magic happens. The only thing you're gonna get in more of the known is more of what you already expect. If you step into the unknown, what you're gonna get is you're gonna get something that you wouldn't expect. You, your brain will not know where to go and how to control the situation. And if you could simply observe it and allow it to be there, you'll find that then you have more power. So the purpose of this video is knowing that you can focus more on surrendering to the present moment, surrendering to it and trusting it. One big lesson for me in my life too is patience. When you're trying to control things, you're normally not a very patient person. I'm in this Airbnb right now, and I want nothing more than to be in this house that I'm getting ready to move into within the next week. And I'm waiting for the tenant moved out. Tomorrow he's turning the keys, and I have to wait for property management. Things aren't happening as, as fast as my control freak mind would like it so that then I can start working and have a better background for these videos and be in the house. I've been traveling for 3 months, so part of me really wants to get to the house. By the time you see this video, I'll probably already show you that house on Instagram or something. However, it's about surrendering and trusting and understanding this idea as well. What if the higher mind, the higher self, could bring things to you in even a more amazing way if you would just let go of trying to control it? Because it's almost like the ego's insisting this is how things have to happen, and the higher self's like, I could show you something way more amazing that you wouldn't even expect if you just let go of the reins. But what's happening is you are set on your ways and as you sit on your ways, you're making this little, this little box for yourself. This is the way things are. But you see, the key to this is trusting, letting go, and knowing that you, if you actually realize that you're getting pain from this beliefs, you're getting pain from these rules that are giving you reasons not to feel happy, that keep you trapped in lower vibrational emotion, you can then see what you're doing in a new way. So this video is specifically designed to help you to see what was unconscious. And when you develop and you become more aware of this, this is where the power really is. The power is in this awareness and in this ability to realize that this is the key to the process. It's letting go of control, is surrendering to the present moment. It's knowing that things are good the way they are. I do have a meditation that's on trusting the universe that will help to wire in this idea, this concept. I recommend you listen to it for 21 days. Watch how your life begins to change. You'll literally change your energetic field as you do it, and it will help you to do that. So with that being said, I hope you enjoyed this video, but as always, peace, much love, and namaste.
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