In this motivational monologue, the speaker argues that setting personal boundaries and embracing vulnerability are the key actions that make a person more "magnetic"—i.e., respected, confident, and attractive. He shares his own struggles with people‑pleasing, childhood conditioning, and fear of rejection, then illustrates how these patterns repeat in adult relationships (e.g., a client’s narcissistic ex‑friend). He differentiates ghosting from a conscious “no‑contact” decision, explains why we gravitate toward familiar, often toxic, dynamics, and shows how awareness and the willingness to say no transform personal power. The speaker recounts several personal anecdotes—early YouTube hustle, a teenage rejection, and a pivotal conversation with a successful friend—to demonstrate how vulnerability leads to greater respect and success. Throughout, he promotes his paid community, Magnetic Mastery, describing its weekly live coaching, meditations, and accountability, and invites viewers to join via magneticmastery.com. The video concludes with a call‑to‑action to watch a related video on stopping people‑pleasing and becoming more magnetic.
Chapters
You will literally become more magnetic when you set boundaries with other people because boundaries, setting boundaries, the ability to say no to somebody else, the ability to say no to something you don't want to do means that you're no longer abandoning yourself. It literally implies that you value you. I know for a long time when I was learning how to set boundaries, I was so bad at it for such a long time. I would have people ask me to come over to do things, to go out, and I literally didn't even see it as an option to say no. And I could tell as well that I had this people pleaser mentality where when I would hang out with certain people, I would kind of morph into like whatever they would want me to be. I would be a certain way, I would show up a certain way, and it was very hard for me to say no. And the interesting thing is, is that what I was afraid to do is I was afraid to be the real me. I was afraid to be vulnerable and express what I actually wanted to do because I was actually afraid of rejection. I was afraid of being abandoned. I think a lot of times with people that have trouble setting boundaries is they're afraid of, of being abandoned. If they do set boundaries, they're afraid of really showing their true colors. They're afraid of showing what they really want. Now, I think one of the reasons this may be active is because as kids, we may have been patterned into not expressing our true needs. We may be used to, maybe you express to your mom or your dad what you wanted and you realize that when you did that, you got shamed, which means that you then thought there was something wrong with you. I was in yesterday with, actually today, I was doing a call with my Magnetic Mastery membership, which is like weekly coaching and accountability and stuff like that. And today's theme was boundaries. And I brought somebody on and she explained that every time she would express what she wanted, her dad would literally like shame her and make her feel like whatever she wanted was like annoying, didn't matter. And then she would internalize everything because she was in an interesting position where what she was doing is she had a narcissistic ex-best friend that was her friend like 9 months ago. She cut it off completely. And her question to me was about ghosting this person versus like going no contact. Like, what do I do now? Because that person, ironically enough, during the time on that call, that I was doing that call today, that friend tried calling her and she didn't pick up obviously because she was on the Zoom session. But what I explained is there's a big difference between ghosting somebody and going no contact. Ghosting someone is normally there's an energy that is afraid to show why you ghosted this person or you're afraid to show why you went no contact. Whereas if you go no contact, you can actually explain to somebody else why you're going no contact. Now in her situation, she had this narcissistic ex-best friend that she was like, she used to work with. And she explained this story about how she went to a club once and she got knocked out by some guy. And her friend literally was like, left her in the club, knocked out on the floor, left her. And she, and then later on was like mad at her because she ruined the night. And it was interesting because then eventually she realized that this friend, this narcissistic best friend that she had, one of the reasons she was attracted to this narcissistic best friend and then she eventually cut off contact was because she had a stepdad growing up that was very similar. And he would shame her for things happening to her instead of support her. And in a weird way, she may have felt comfortable with this ex-best friend because they did the same thing. There's something about it that felt familiar. Now, sometimes it's weird. We attract people into our lives that reflect back what we believe we deserve. So if you've ever attracted somebody that's a narcissist, it might be because in a way you put up with that kind of energy. Not only do you put up with it, but you might secretly kind of feel familiar with it. There's something about somebody trying to control you or somebody that's giving you all these like gaslight demands that feels kind of in a weird way safe. Safe a lot of times just means familiar from childhood. So one of the things that this woman was doing that was in Magnetic Mastery, she's realizing that she can actually be more vulnerable. And being vulnerable, the thing about being vulnerable is we believe if we're vulnerable and we express what we really want, we're afraid that we're gonna get shamed or we're gonna get in trouble or we're gonna get rejected or we're not gonna have approval. I will tell you from experience that the more vulnerable I have been, with friends and expressing my true emotions, the more I've actually been respected. I remember for a long time, one of my best friends, he's super successful, has like a huge company. I know, I remember for a long time, I would feel so kind of small in my friend's presence because I felt like there was, like, I just, I felt small and I felt like I kind of became a yes man for a long time. And eventually what I did is, I became aware of this pattern. And at first I got really mad at myself and I was like, why was I like morphing to everyone else's sense of reality? And why was I being this way? But then I eventually realized, I forgave myself first off for doing that. And then I made the choice. The awareness is the key here. My friend, the person in the Magnetic Mastery becoming aware that her best friend had a similar energy to her stepdad was like a big breakthrough for her, I could tell. Because then she realized it's not really about the best friend. It's about what, what about me lets this energy around and doesn't say no to it, right? So for me, for a long time, I would have trouble setting boundaries and I could just tell that I was becoming like a yes man to certain people in my life. And then what I did is I decided, you know what, I'm gonna start becoming more, I'm gonna start being more vulnerable. I'm gonna start sharing what I really think and feel. And I remember talking to one of my best friends and actually expressing to him how I felt. And I could just tell there was something that switched. I could tell he respected me more. I could tell that there was a greater sense of depth there, a greater sense of emotional availability and vulnerability. So I'll tell you from experience, not only did that help that, but it also helped even in dating. I remember when I started making this choice about myself, I then started— because as a nice guy people pleaser, I was so afraid to show the woman I was dating that I was sexually attracted to them. So I'd be in this like friend zone for like a long time. And then eventually I became aware of this pattern. I realized it's kind of a pattern that my dad had for a long time. And there's also, I had this memory of when I was like 13 years old and I asked this 18-year-old to dance with me at this like community park thing that I was at. And I was rejected. She was like, oh, haha. She had me dance with another like 13-year-old. But in that moment I made this meaning, I made this story that it's not safe for me to express my true desires. And actually what I did is I actually reframed that where I realized that I was a pretty fricking badass 13-year-old to go up to an 18-year-old to ask them out, right? So then I actually was able to reframe that past memory and I started to feel more confident. So in a weird way, one of the most powerful things you could do is realize that a lot of the things in your life that feel familiar are simply— are a lot of the things in your life and the relationships you have in your life are simply things that you believe you deserve because they're familiar energies that normally stem from childhood. And once you become aware of this energy, you can then do something about it. But if you're not aware of it, it runs you. Awareness here is key. And I will say from experience, even like when I first got on YouTube, for example, back in 2017, I remember my frame was kind of weak where anybody that like needed my energy, I would like morph and I wouldn't want the rejection or disapproval and I would go hang out, right? So I remember I have a group of friends that I would hang out with, drink, and it was a lot of fun. They're still good friends to this day. However, at the time, I remember I'd feel so guilty if I like said no to hanging out. But by saying no to that, I was able to say yes to my daily videos that I committed to. So realize when you say no to something, you're saying yes to something else. So by saying no to hanging out in those times, it allowed me the freedom to where then I started to create this amazing momentum on YouTube. And within 6 months, my whole entire life transformed, but I had to start valuing me and my mission. And maybe right now, are you centered on a certain direction with your mission? Are you centered on a certain direction with you living in integrity with how you prefer to show up in the world? Are you being the most vulnerable version of you? Because if not, then you might be tuning to everyone else's frame for safety. You might be tuning to everyone else's frame because this familiar energy that you're used to when you were a kid and realize that the more you become aware of this energy, the more you can then take your power back and then realize that a lot of the shit in your life that you've been internalizing, you can realize that there's their shit, not yours. That's their stuff. If your friends don't like it because you're focused on your vision or your purpose, that's called conditional love. Conditional. They are friends with you as long as you do what they want you to do. Because a lot of times growing up, we may have had love that was conditional with our parents. And they may have said, well, if you get straight A's, I'll love you. If you act this way, you comb your, you know, something I had to do for a while was tuck in my shirt and comb my hair because my dad's a firefighter. And that was, I guess, what firefighter kids are supposed to do. Then when I turned 15 or 16, I said, screw that. I grew out my hair a little bit. I looked like, what's his name, Jesse McCarthy or some shit. Jesse McCartney. I forget. Some like young pop kid like Aaron Carter or some shit. But anyways, I completely changed my look because all of a sudden I had all this freedom. But I realized that one thing I had to realize is that love is unconditional, that if your friends have a problem with that, that is their stuff, not yours, and that you don't really have to internalize it. And the more, even the more successful you become, I'll tell you, the more successful I become as I'm like walking around in front of my house, not that I'm trying to brag or anything, but the more successful you become, the more boundaries you have to have around your time. The more that you have to actually say no. Like I have, because I've been on YouTube for a while, I get like messages all the time from in my email, like, come on, come do this, come do this, come do this. If I said yes to everything, I'd have no time to do anything else. So part of having boundaries for me is having the ability to say no to things allows me to say yes to myself. It allows me to say yes to what I'm really passionate about. And the key is, is you think what's going to happen is you're gonna get rejected. But I promise you, when you set boundaries, you will actually get more respect. You will feel more empowered and you'll in a way become a boundary ninja for a while. You start saying like no to a lot of things, but then you realize eventually that this isn't about like saying external boundaries of saying no. It's about feeling safe in your own body. Because when you're safe in your own body and you're present inside your own body, you can then clearly see what's your shit versus what's other people's shit. And you don't have to internalize when other people get mad. And that was a theme of this Magnetic Mastery, the membership call that I do. I do it every Sunday-ish. Depends on when you're watching this. I might eventually change one of the days, but if you wanna join a community of like-minded people that are all focused on becoming their highest vibrational selves, every single week we go live. We do that of live coaching, we do live meditations, and we also do live accountability where we go into groups and we do group work of becoming vulnerable, transforming our life from the inside out. This has only been open for a couple weeks now, but if you want to join, now is the time to join. Go to www.magneticmastery.com. Join the highest vibrational community on the planet. Plan It, Raise Your Vibe every single week. These were inspired from my 21-day challenges where I've seen so many people transform, like 15,000 people have been through them. So I thought, what if we had an ongoing version of that, which is just a low monthly fee and you can cancel at any time. But anyways, you wanna check that out, go to magneticmastery.com. And then also if you want a video that is gonna show you exactly how to stop people pleasing, how to set boundaries easily, and how to become the most magnetic version of you, watch this video right here. The less you give a shit what other people think about you, the more magnetic you are. And it's an interesting thing because when you let go of giving a fuck, you will notice that people respond to you differently and that you're not attached to what other people say, think,
