Watch her heal her inner child and become FREE in 29 minutes

We might have an angry inner child that's like, I didn't have the love expressed in childhood. So there's an angry inner child on the inside that we can call our shadow. But here's the thing. What if we were like, how do I get rid of an angry inner child? How do I get rid of it? Doesn't it sound— do you see the energy? You guys are right. The key is to love it. But are you loving it by trying to get rid of it? Anything you try to get rid of amplifies. If you try right now not to think negative thoughts or you try to control your thoughts, you wanna know what's gonna happen? Lots of thoughts are gonna come up, tons of thoughts because you're trying to control, right? So what if you could witness that inner child part of you? What is a dark aspect maybe of an inner child or a dark aspect of the shadow that you might feel kind of uncomfortable with? What is maybe the emotion rooted in that? And let's take a deep breath in. Any time we're trying to get this information inside of our subconscious, we take a deep breath because when we stop breathing, we lock in, we lock in and we hold ourselves back. So what would you say is if you were to like kind of bring to mind right now something as an aspect maybe that you kind of resist integrating or you kind of judge? This negative aspect of my shadow, I don't like it, I want to get rid of it. What would it be?

Honestly, the first thing that comes to my mind is the trust that I had in other people. Yeah, that was me trusting all the time people that were always hurting me. It wasn't just about like my mom, but it was also about other people. So I, I disliked the fact that I trusted people.

Yeah.

And so when I try to trust, I get angry at myself because it doesn't feel right. Yeah.

Yeah. So when you're tapping into— good job on breathing, by the way. Let's give it up for her. Thank you for sharing that. Thank you for being vulnerable. Because I imagine there's also people in the crowd, unfortunately, in our collective consciousness, this is a common thing. This is something my mom went through. And I became aware in a breathwork ceremony about energy that was stored inside my body connected to my mom because another woman in breathwork was releasing energy. And it was very powerful and a lot of emotion came up and it was mine, but not mine. It was very interesting. It was connected to my family lineage. In a way, if we look at this, the trust, is there a judgment based on the trust that is connected to feeling naive?

Yes.

So is that what you say? The naive?

Yeah.

And what is the choice then made? Would you mind holding it up just a little bit?

Sorry.

It's okay. So would you, what is the, Is the belief— what is the belief then around that? How about this? What is the belief protecting you from? What emotion?

Crying. From like feeling, period.

Yeah, yeah. So if—

like I mentioned earlier, that, you know, sometimes if somebody just barely touches me like that, sometimes I'm just like, don't touch me, right? But I don't mean it, right? I literally want that connection, but I can't.

I don't— it's like, yeah.

I feel like I'm going back to that little child, like, don't touch me because you're gonna hurt me, or yeah, this is gonna happen. So that's what I'm struggling with, like, how do you love your inner child? Like, I can love my children, I gave all my love to my children. Yeah, but how do you love your, your own child? Like, how do you go back and save that child?

To the challenging— the challenging thing about this is that we all have an inner child that was doing the best they could who didn't know. How can we expect an inner child to know the intentions of an older man, right? So that inner child part of you that felt that way, we can judge it or we can think it's naive, but it was just doing the best that it could. It wasn't that part of you, it wasn't their fault. And very often when it comes to this childhood energy, we internalize it and think that it has something to do with us. I attracted this situation because there's something wrong with me. Does that resonate? Yes. Is there that?

I say that a lot to myself.

Yeah.

Even though I know it's not true, I still bring that in.

Yeah. So there's an aspect. So what do you think a breakthrough is maybe around this relationship with your inner child that could maybe allow them to feel seen, not judged? And how could you begin? 'Cause you're doing it, by the way, throughout this entire experience, she keeps breathing. Am I right? When you, let's give it up. So, and just keep that breath going. Now, when you, you're an adult now who has the body awareness to breathe into your body. So take a deep breath in. And right now, Feel the separation between you and me. Feel the separation between you and the people in front of you. Feel the separation between you and the walls. What do you feel happening in your body right now, just as you focus on the brim of your, your body versus these other things?

Actually, I felt like I was more in control of myself and I had more power.

When you just now doing that exercise? Interesting, because what we're learning to do is learning to trust our body. To put the pressure on a little kid to have the power to whatever happened with an older person, right? That's a big burden to put on a little kid. It's not that little kid's fault. It's not something that they did wrong. It's something that we can begin becoming aware of, of allowing ourselves to feel inside of our own body again. And being present, you can also be present with that inner child part of you. So let me ask you a question. If you were to take another deep breath in, close your eyes and let it go. And if you were to imagine that little girl in front of you, any age that comes to you, you just see what is she wearing? You could just, you don't have to say it out loud, but maybe, See what she's wearing. See what her outfit is. See how she is holding herself, her body language. See maybe how she feels. And keep breathing. Beautiful. Now, what do you notice about that inner child?

She's resilient.

Okay. How's she feeling? Is there—

She's happy.

She's happy. Okay. Let's go a little bit underneath that happiness. Because there's aspects of our inner child that we sometimes maybe don't wanna look at. It's easy to look at the happiness, but maybe we can actually see and acknowledge emotion inside that inner child part of us and just witness them. We don't need to fix them. It's okay to feel sadness. It's okay to feel anger. It's okay to feel whatever emotion comes up. If you were to give her permission to feel whatever's coming up. What comes up?

She wants to scream.

Yeah, maybe you let her scream. Yeah, maybe let her scream and just witness her scream. You don't have to go and fix her. You don't have to Coddle, you just be present with her and breathe with her. What's happening now?

She's calming down.

Mm. So in the witnessing of that part of you that was screaming, there's now a calming, a calming down that happens.

Like being noticed.

Yeah. Yeah. Now what if you close your eyes again and you imagine, let's imagine that part of you that was screaming and then what happens is she begins to relax. What happens when she's relaxing? Is there any other emotion that's coming up or?

Having a hard time seeing her relax.

Yeah. Was there something as a kid that would allow you to relax? I think a blankie.

I was asleep. They had me suck on my thumb.

Okay, well maybe imagine her sucking on her thumb.

I think I did that till I was 13.

Yeah.

Because every time I went there, that calmed me down. It's like the only thing nobody could take from me.

Right. Interesting. So if you imagine now that inner child part of you, the relief that they feel, is there anything, is there any message or anything they desire from you? If you close your eyes and see, what do you want? How can I be with you?

All I hear is that she just wants to be heard.

Yeah, that's beautiful. Is there anything she wants to say?

Well, she said thank you.

Okay, is there anything else she wants to say?

To listen to what you're saying.

Okay.

But no, she's like literally, she's just kind of standing there saying thank you because, um, yeah, she never got to scream. Like, yeah, so, because when she screamed, she always got in trouble if she did anything that was too hyper. I never could sit still.

Right.

And I like to talk.

Mm-hmm.

And they just kind of took that.

Yeah.

Didn't allow me— when I would speak, I would get in trouble.

Right.

I was always too much.

Yeah. Good job. She's still breathing. Yeah. Yeah. Well, maybe, maybe underneath that, if there's crying that comes up— but sometimes underneath screaming is crying.

Yeah.

You guys ever experienced that? You yell, you scream, and then that energy comes up.

Yeah.

Would you like to scream?

Haha.

How about this? Would the little— with the inner child part of you in the safe space of here?

Yes.

Like to scream?

Yeah.

And all of us witnessing are just observing. We're observing the aspects of ourselves that we never allowed to scream, because all of us have an inner child part of us that that wasn't allowed at certain points to feel anger, that wasn't allowed to express the tension that was going on inside of their body.

Or allowed to cry.

Or allowed to cry. So what if right now we open up the floor and we allow that little girl inside of you to scream and to release that emotion? And we're gonna be here just as empathetic witnesses. And whatever you release, Are you like screaming for real? Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's what I'm talking about. Just allow yourself. Allow yourself to take a deep breath in and you can just let it out. Present, not perfect. Yeah. Yeah, that was weird. Well, I'm gonna ask you one more time to do it again and to allow yourself— and allow yourself to even become aware of it inside, the inner critic that's like, oh, did I do that good? Or what about— we're all, we're all rooting for you. We're all allowed— we all would love to see you release that inner girl inside of you that wants to scream, that was never allowed to scream. And right now, if you were to take in a deep breath and on the out-breath, just allow yourself to let go. You don't have to hold it together anymore. Take a deep breath in. Yeah. And here's the thing too, the fear that comes up, it's okay. When fear comes up, You can feel the fear and do it anyways. It doesn't mean stop. The fear means you're on the edge of a breakthrough. You're on the edge of a release that's been stored inside of your body for years. So now, what if you were to take a deep breath in and just allow yourself to let go? That's okay. Aah! There you go. There you go. You see what's underneath that? Underneath that scream are beautiful tears. If those tears had a voice, What would they say?

Thank you.

Yeah.

And thank you for not judging me for letting things out that I just keep to myself.

Beautiful, beautiful. Let's give her a hand. Stay here for a moment. I just want to integrate this. So keep breathing. You're doing an amazing job. You are a symbol. Look at all these beautiful faces. Look how many people you've touched by feeling emotion. This, this is where power is. This is power. This isn't something to be avoided, shamed of. When you feel the fear, you still had the courage to express it. You didn't have to. I wasn't gonna force you to do it, but you had the courage inside of yourself to release it. And underneath that release, was it felt like some form— felt like something was releasing in your throat too. Is that true? What was happening in your throat when you did that?

We were just talking about my throat chakra earlier.

Yeah. Which is interesting. This pattern was literally lodged inside of her throat and she wasn't allowed to scream for who knows how long. You've held that scream in your body for a long time. Yeah. And it's been under the surface. Attracting to you situations that keep feeding the scream, frustrations and situations, memories even. The memories that you have from your past might be also being filtered through that unprocessed emotion. Does that land for anybody? What if the memories you have of your past are partially in the subconscious because there's this unprocessed energy in your body? Right? And as you're releasing it, she literally was grabbing her neck. Something was releasing from your neck, which is such a beautiful expression of us in this audience, us in this room, of being able to connect to that aspect of ourselves who did not allow ourselves to scream. Whether it was some form of trauma that was unjust when you were a kid, some form of abuse, whatever it was, it was not fair. We can't blame the inner child for the naiveness that they may have had, but the scream wants to come out. And what you just allowed yourself to do is beautiful by allowing it to come out. So if we were to take another deep breath in, I want you to acknowledge that what you just did as well is you began to embrace the darker part of yourself you didn't want to look at. You wanted to look at the happiness. You wanted to look at the good stuff. And where was the— where was the gold? The gold is in the thing that we were avoiding the most. And in the witness of 100+ people witnessing you in this beautiful energy of expression, you now have a reference experience, and every single one of you has a reference experience of someone coming up here and being seen an energy that normally we would hold back. Does that make sense? So we can say that it's uncomfortable to be seen and that fear may come up. We may feel afraid, but guess what? Do it anyways. Release the emotions stored inside of the body. Set a boundary if you need to. Express how you feel. Show vulnerability. Show your feelings. These are things that are uncomfortable when you weren't allowed to do it as a kid. So just kind of integrating and closing out this experience here today, what are ways in which you can allow yourself to be seen more? Is there anything you've been blocking yourself from actually being seen in day-to-day life that you could commit to that maybe is scary? But—

Well, I mean, I started doing my videos. That was scary enough.

Yeah. Interesting, right? This becomes a metaphor. The thing that you're avoiding, you're avoiding making content and your goal is to be a content creator, right? Your intention is to be a content creator. Where is that block coming from? It was literally in her throat. You expressed it. Yeah. And now you look much lighter, much more free. How many of you can feel a shift in her energy? Right? And the shift in your energy came Not from intellectualizing it and trying to figure it out. Not from waiting till it's perfect for you to make the content or waiting for the perfect buttery smooth voice to yell as loud as you can. It was uncomfortable. You're in a pressurized experience with 100+ people watching you and you did it anyways. Yeah, with the strangers. The strangers, but now they're no longer strangers. Yeah, hi. Because this is a, It's a beautiful reflection of what's universal to all of us, which is this energy that you're expressing today.

So that's the thing, is, you know, understanding that I'm not alone in a lot of things. Yeah, you know, you put yourself— you isolate yourself as if you are alone.

Yeah. And if you look out into the crowd, look at all these beautiful faces of emotion that has been a reflection of the energy you were able to release. So you're not alone. Not only you're not alone, but like you're here with empathetic people that feel the same way you feel. Yes. And how does that feel?

That feels good. I mean, it doesn't feel good y'all have to go through it, but.

Right. Well.

But it feels good to know that I'm not alone.

I bet it did. It maybe didn't feel good in certain definitions, but I feel like I see a lot of relief on people's faces right now through your expression. And moving forward, it's a powerful symbol that you were able to be vulnerable and express yourself and other people, it resonated with them at a deep level, not on a surface level, on a deep level. And that's a beautiful way to start to put yourself out there. Put yourself out there. You put yourself out there, you give people the opportunity to see the real you. You also give other people the opportunity to release and to feel what comes up in them through your expression. And it's no different when you start, when you commit to YouTube videos, you share your story and that becomes a beautiful reflection for everyone else that they can actually then find you because you're doing that work and you're doing that. A lot of times people will look at the people when they make a shift or they start to be vulnerable, they'll think of the people they may lose like friends from high school or family members that might judge. But they also don't look at all the people you could attract in that do resonate with you. Yeah. So that's an interesting thing to look at. It's like we focus on the side that like keeps us to stop, that makes us stop, right? We focus on the negative thing instead of focusing on the authentic thing that you will gain by being the real you. And what's interesting about myself is There was a while when I started to become successful on YouTube that I really craved my dad being proud of me. He always, like, he's a fire investigator. He's a very analytical person. It's interesting, I was talking to him for Father's Day the other day and he was talking, he was like telling me how he's a people pleaser. And he was like, I am a people pleaser. And he always says, this is who, it's just who I am. I've always been this way. And I was kind of working with my dad in my own like ninja way. I was like, so when did you decide that you were this way? So I don't know, I've always been this way, you know? And then I was kind of helping him look at other aspects of his life where he was kind of claiming his power back from his job, where whatever his job gives him to do, he does it. He's like employee of the year. And he just works, works, works, works, and like overasserts himself because he, someone has to do it and he just says yes. And what's interesting is looking at and kind of like helping him, I don't know, kind of helping him see it and kind of acknowledge where he could begin like setting boundaries was powerful. But the point I was going at with this is my dad, what were we talking about before? We were talking about, I was trying, yeah, right before.

The people pleaser, but how you're, This is the proudness.

Yes. Thank you. So the proudness was something that I would wish. Like, as my dad was watching me grow on YouTube, I wanted him to, like, acknowledge the success that I had on YouTube. I wanted, like, you know, it was an interesting thing where the more I didn't need him to be proud and the more I let go of needing that approval from him, and the more I accepted and I started to approve of myself, And I accepted that my dad might not understand what I do. He'd always tell me, and eventually he did, he would say it in weird ways, but I would think he really didn't mean it. He'd say, I'm proud of you, but I have no idea what you do. So I always say, I don't get YouTube, I don't understand it, but I'm proud of you. And he would say that, but I would still think he doesn't get, because he doesn't see me. Do you guys see? Like he's not seeing me. He's saying he's proud, but he doesn't see me 'cause he doesn't understand it. But then what I did is I started to see me. I started to accept. And also in a weird way, I started to accept my dad. I started to accept that maybe he's not gonna understand it. And then when I was on the phone with my dad and I would catch up with him, I would actually, not as a mechanism to control, to get him to be proud of me, but I would in a way ask him about his work, even though I've, you know, grew up with him. I know what his job entails. I'd be interested in him and what he was doing. Not as a, I just, it was literally just a thing, not with no motive. But what was interesting is as I began to accept him and as I began to become interested in him, he then started to be interested in me. And he was like, oh, where are you traveling right now? Well, what are you doing? It's cool. So what do you do at these live events? Like he started, it was trippy. So what was interesting is there may have also been a two-way mirror there with my dad. Or he may have felt like I didn't really see him too. Not that it's my job to be his dad. Like, I'm not saying it's anyone's role here, but it's interesting that if reality is a mirror, I started to, in a way, accept not need my dad to see me in a certain way. I started to see him and like just appreciate who he is at the level that he's at. I let go of the resistance and the need to make him proud. I started to accept myself. And as I started to let that go, I started to receive it, which was very interesting. Now I say that, and the key is not let's do it to get the result because then it's attachment to outcome. But what if there's an opportunity here to accept your parents and to accept them the way that they are without needing them to acknowledge maybe what they did? Of course, inner child-wise, you can go back and you can, you can do this inner work with yourself. But if you— there could be— the next step could be to look at that energy. Does anything come up for you as I say that right now? As maybe accepting that— is there some form of acceptance there that could be a breakthrough? Or maybe not. Maybe now—

I mean, yeah, I mean, I just— I kind of just separated myself from it, from all of that stuff, and just kind of leave it to them to get a hold of me or talk to me, right? You know, or if there's a family gathering, I'll show up. Yeah, but I mean, other than that, I just come to accept that this is who they are. And yeah, I mean, I will say my dad saw my— one of my journal prompts on TikTok, and he actually thanked me for it.

That's cool. Nice.

So I was like, well, at least I'm getting somewhere with him, right? But so yeah, I mean, I, I've learned to just accept them for who they are and yeah, and just kind of just let that energy be theirs and not, and not come into mine anymore.

Yeah. And one other thing I'll say about this too is a lot of times we're afraid of ruffling the feathers of our family because of their expectations of us. We're afraid of them and the judgments or them not accepting. At the same time, then what happens is we shut down our light because we want to make them happy. But what if something at a soul level they wanted to learn in this life was unconditional love? What if you being the real you gives them a reflection that maybe they don't like, but the aspect of them that doesn't like it is the ego aspect that's attached to being right and is attached to a certain expectation of you? Does this make sense? So whereas I see it happen a lot where people avoid the tension of their family or the, you know, certain cultures want you to get certain degrees, do certain things for a living, and if you don't do that, you're a failure. Yeah. But at the same time, you end up rejecting yourself, doing something you hate. And because you're in that energy, it doesn't feel good. But at the same time, what if the opportunity was for you to own that power, to give them that reflection? And what they do with it is not your responsibility. Do you guys see that? That's where the shift is. Yes. So your parents, not understanding you, that's their thing. That's not your thing to manage. Your thing to try to prove yourself, that's something for, that might be their thing to deal with because your job is just to be most authentically you. Yeah. Now there may be temporary readjustments made when you start being the real you between you and your family. There may be years where it's like kind of like that. But then what can happen is you can also start attracting people into your life that resonate with that courageous version of you. And as I've said, most of my deep connections in my life now are in my life because of the courage that I had to start making content and to kind of go against the grain of like, go to school and be a lawyer and all of these other things. So I wouldn't have the beauty of the connections I have if it weren't for that energy of not being afraid to just jump into that, to jump in that energy. And this is who I prefer to be. So we also tell ourselves like we want the approval of our parents, but it's like approval in general. It's like what if we can accept the disapproval and allow it to be there? It's only this thing if we, it's almost like the boogeyman only has power if you give it power and you believe it's there, right? But if you just, if you know that you can handle it, if you know that that's their thing to manage and not yours, And if you're just focused on expressing you, that's where you start to, in a way, create more safety in your body. Remember we were talking earlier, feel the separation between you and me? Now feel the separation between you and your family members. And watch how that exercise allows you to, doesn't mean you can't love them, doesn't mean you can't stay connected to them, but you might start seeing what's your stuff versus what's their stuff. And then as you create safety in your side of yourself, it won't be conditional on mom and dad's approval. Does this make sense? So really it all comes back to how we started this. It comes back to feeling inside of your body and letting that be the agency for you, letting that be what you connect to. So what's the big insight closing off this interaction today? What's the big insight that you're gonna carry with you? What's the message you wanna remember?

One, two, I'm gonna go out there and scream before I leave.

I love that. Yeah.

I think I'm going to take advantage of that.

I love that. Find a place to hike and just let it all out.

Yes, and just scream. Um, but I think it's the fact that I, I, well, I didn't expect for you to call me up here, but the fact that I did get up here in front of everybody and be myself.

Yeah, yeah, let's give her a hand for that. Yeah, that's beautiful.