Watch This Before You Try to “Attract Love” Again...

You will attract into your life the love you believe you deserve. But what happens when you believe you are not worthy of love? What happens when you believe you keep attracting people into your life that are toxic, or you keep attracting people that don't treat you the way you want to be treated? Could it be that there is a subconscious block inside that may be familiarized since you were a kid that is literally blocking you from experiencing that love in your life? And what if there were a few insight shifts you could have that would completely transform your energy, that would allow you to finally start feeling worthy, whole, and complete? What if there were a few simple shifts that would have you being good either way when it comes to even attracting love? What if you were able to recognize that other people in your life are simply a reflection of what's happening inside of here? What if there's a deeper realization here under this insight that will have you completely transform the way you relate to other people, the way that you relate to yourself, and the way that you relate to reality itself? Now, in this video, I'm going to show you this insight that will change everything for you. That will have you feeling more free, more permission to be yourself, that will have you recognizing that other people are playing out the energy dynamics from the past and how you can actually start to process that energy to feel more calm and regulated and safe. Understanding that safe is not an emotion, it's a concept. Understanding that worthy is not an emotion. Don't feel worthy. What does that even mean? I feel safe. I feel worthy. In this video, I'm going to show you how to transform your understandings of what this is and why this will completely free you and allow you to finally start feeling calm, regulated, and peace, to allow things to be what they are, which then means you're not trying to control, infusing resistance as a block to the love that can come into your life. So that's what you're going to experience. It's a live that I did on Instagram where I got into a flow state talking about this question that came up. You're going to see me riff on it and get into this insight that I think is so powerful that you need to hear that will really transform the way you view you, yourself, and reality. So let's get into it right now. Someone says it hurts to hear you attract the love you think you deserve. Because it makes it feel like it's my fault that I've attracted men who hurt me. I didn't ask for that. Why is it always my fault? Why did it— why is it always my fault? Interesting question. And there are different layers there too that can be looked at in the question itself. So on one hand, you attract the love you deserve. You believe you deserve. So it's not— so here's the thing. Here's something that might help you. It's not that you just— you attract the love you deserve. It's that you attract the love you believe you deserve and you attract the love that you have familiarized. Because it feels like— and when it says it feels like it's my fault, well, part of the challenge with this is if we believe and we put the blame on other people, we remain in a perpetrator, victim, rescuer dynamic. We remained in the codependency triangle. So what happens is other people are the ones that are the people doing that to you. So it's an energy dynamic that might feel familiar. And one of the things is, is if we outsource that and say it's their fault, not mine, We don't take responsibility for our patterns in the equation, which our pattern in the equation might be that it feels familiar. We enable it. We put up and tolerate people that act like that. And until you realize that, you will stay in that energy of powerlessness. So one of the steps of empowerment is realizing that this might feel familiar to be in that dynamic. It might feel familiar to be in non-reciprocal relationships. It might be what you know. And when we talk about deserve, the way that I view it, it's more for me, the way that I view this is a little different than the stereotypical way that like people will talk about it because they say it's all about you want to feel worthy, right? When you feel more worthy, you'll attract more love. Once again, we get to the same idea of safety. Where is safety in the body? Where is the emotion of safety? And we say, well, safe isn't an emotion. It's something you just feel. It's calm. Might be regulated nervous system. Well, the same thing with worthy. What does it feel like to feel worthy? Once again, worthy is a concept. I am worthy. I am worthy. I am worthy. What does that even mean? So what I say is I have kind of a different perspective on this. And that is that we are both not worthy and worthy at the same time. What I mean by that is you could say, I am worthy. I am worthy. I am worthy, which is normally what people do who actually feel not worthy. Because if you feel worthy, do you have to say, "I am worthy, I am worthy, I am worthy"? No. Do you think people that are like, you say, "Okay, I'm gonna do affirmations 'cause I wanna be rich." Do you think rich people go around doing, "I'm rich, I'm rich, I'm rich, I'm rich"? No, they don't. They don't sit there and say that as affirmations that have to reaffirm it. It's just, it's natural for their identity. But if you feel not worthy, you might think that you need to continue to say, I am worthy, I am worthy, I am worthy. But that only infuses and refuels the feeling of not being worthy. Does this make sense? So it could be that because you're trying to attract the love you deserve, you believe you're not worthy. And the key is you want to feel worthy so that you can attract the love. But by trying to feel worthy and by thinking of affirmations, it's actually infusing the resistance of the shame that is there that says I'm broken and there's something wrong with me. So something to realize, one thing I found very empowering is I am both worthy and not worthy at the same time. Everything just is. Everything exists. Exists. You exist. It is. It's— this is almost like a deeper level of consciousness that in a way is kind of lightly connected to like Eckhart Tolle's teachings on like enlightenment. Everything just is. You just exist. You are. You are not more worthy than anyone else or less worthy than anyone else. That is actually freeing. Now, to the ego, it wants to feel pride. It wants to feel better than other people. And that becomes a prison. So what I'm saying here is you can continue to play the game of you need to attract the love you deserve. But then I feel like it's my fault and it's their fault. Why is it always my fault? That's a certain energy, a certain game that you're playing. But what I'm saying is instead of— if we can accept that we are both worthy and not worthy at the same time, we can be more free because then we're not playing that game. We're not trying to prove ourselves to anybody else. So this for me was a liberating idea when I first learned it and I started to embody that and realize that if I could just accept myself more, be aware of my patterns, be aware that what you might be attracted to is actually the energy that brings up that where you're trying to prove yourself to other people. But really it's not about trying to be more worthy. It's about processing and feeling the shame that is there that says I'm broken or something wrong with me. So it's more of just a letting go of not worthiness than feeling more worthy. Does that make sense? So when we start getting into fault, whose fault is it? The fault is a story. It's also a story. Like I'm thinking of Eckhart Tolle and kind of like some of his teachings now that we just kind of had that thread, right? Of talking about like the is-ness, right? And I remember one time he was being asked about betrayal He said somebody came up and was like, someone betrayed me. And he sat there for a minute. He goes, whoa, betrayal. Someone betrayed me. Sounds so heavy. It's a story. They say, well, the story is true, but it's also a perspective that carries a lot more weight than just the isness of what it is. So when we say it's my fault or their fault, there's a story that's tied to that. That story might feel familiar. So the difference of this, though, is really becoming aware of where there might be an opportunity to feel the unfelt emotions of the past that are there that say, I'm not worthy. The shame, because the shame hides in the dark. Doesn't wanna be seen. So instead, what the shame wants to do is say, I'm worthy, I am worthy, I am worthy, and then I won't feel this. But actually acceptance of that thing can be very transformative. And then becoming aware of where the stories are. Now, if you were to dive deeper with this, do you have stories about mom and dad and love between mom and dad that was there or not there? And do those stories play themselves out in your dating relationships? Because that many times is what feels familiar. What we normal— what was normalized as a kid becomes what we tolerate as an adult. Does this make sense? Think about that. The energy that was normal when we were a kid, whether love was available or not available, whether we had to prove ourselves to be worthy, whether we needed validation and approval in order to feel good enough or in order to feel love. If we needed to be perfect, whatever the conditions were as a kid to receive love may have been the energy dynamics where then we attract people into our life that we tolerate that energy with because it feels normal, it feels familiar. So a big part of the freedom of this is being aware of the pattern, allowing yourself to feel and recognize the story of it. And then maybe making the choice to let go of that story if you want. Someone says, how do I stop craving my avoidant ex's attention? Interesting question. So you have an avoidant ex and you want their attention. Now the thing that you want to look at here is what is the part of you that is craving attention from the ex. Because sometimes what people think is they think you think you want your avoidant ex's attention. That's what you think you want. But there might be an inner child part of you that wants your attention and you might not be given it. So what it does is you're not giving it to your inner child. It's unprocessed energy that was normalized in childhood. So now that little inner child part of you is looking out to the world and fixating on one person that might not be giving you attention. Now, you want to know the weird payoff here? You might actually like and get off on the payoff of trying to get— like, if you can get your avoidant ex's attention, then you'll have completed and gone back to the primordial home of what was familiar when you were a kid. So you might not actually want your ex's attention. It might actually more so be that what that attention means to you, what that attention might mean to you is validation, approval. You are enough. You see the difference there. So one of the ways you can stop craving your avoidance attention is by being aware that it's not just about the ex and the story you give to the ex. Has more to do with what that ex represents to you as a pattern that might feel familiar to childhood. You may get to keep playing those same familiar dynamics out over and over again. People say, I, I, they want their specific person back, the SP, which is actually a specific pattern that you're just used to and familiar to. But when you start giving your own inner child that attention, you'll find that once you start giving that inner child attention, they may crave less attention on the external from other people. And what's funny is if that ex just turned to you and was like, you know what, I choose you, you're amazing, blah, blah, blah, blah, you may then not even be attracted. Think about that for a minute. How many times in a relationship, in a certain type of dynamic where there's this energy, avoidant anxious attachment style, and you say, I want this person, this person's looking away, I want them, I want them, I want them. And then the moment they look at you, you go, ew, and you look this way. So you say, how can I stop craving my avoidant ex's attention? You literally may only be attracted to that ex avoidant because they're looking over there and you want them to look at you. And that's what feels familiar. And the moment they start looking at you, you think, that's all I want them to look at me. The moment they start looking at you, you're gonna get weirded out and look this way. And you might keep playing this pattern out. This, this person is not what the addiction is to. The pattern. It's the pattern. Do you see how true is that for those watching right now? That, that's the— that you say, I want it, I want it, I want it. You get a little bit of it and you say, and you go the other way. So basically people, like I was watching this movie on the flight yesterday coming back. So I just got back from Europe, 5 weeks away. I watched this movie that I think is one of my new favorite movies. It's called The Life of Chuck. It's called The Life of Chuck. And it's like a Stephen King book, I guess, that was turned into a movie. I thought it was incredible. But one of the ideas in the book is that in between your head is basically the universe. And think about it for a minute. Literally, over the course of your lifetime, you will go— I just got back from Europe. I was for 5 weeks, I was in Europe and there's all these memories and these people that I met, these memories, this live event that I did, all of these things that happened that are now kind of stored in my mind. And over the course of my life, even because a lot of this movie was about like death, life and death and meaning of relationships. And stuff like that. But by the end of our life, it's like a whole entire universe was created inside of our head through different experiences we had with other people and memories. But often what happens is we believe the universe is out there. So we try to change out there, not understanding that the universe is all happening in here. Like even the light that we experience is reflection. Though our brain, everything that's happening is being processed inside of us. So even the other people that you meet, that you can feel and have such a visceral feeling of like who they are and self versus other. At the fundamental core, it's all like a reflection of the one. I know this is kind of a deeper idea that I'm riffing on right now. But that means, like, if you believe that people aren't to be trusted, if you believe that all men are this way, all women are this way, whatever you believe to be true, it's like reality is reflecting that back because the universe is all within our interpretation. Does this make sense? But when we try to change the outside, we create a lot of resistance because then that also comes with control. We try to control, and control creates resistance. Interesting, right? So a big part of freedom is realizing, I think, we kind of summarize a lot of what we've been talking about. Love, joy, and peace is who you naturally are. It's your natural base point. Shame, fear, guilt, anger, and lower vibrational emotions are attachments that we have to past experience. And what happens is the unfelt emotion might be stored inside of our nervous system, our bodies, but also to come with it, stories, stories and beliefs. And if the universe is all happening here and over the course of our life, we go to different spots on the planet and we meet different people, we have different memories. It's still all happening inside of our consciousness, inside of our brain, our mind, like it's It's very liberating. And at the same time empowering, because we're the ones generating the meaning. But a lot of getting into love, joy, peace and is-ness, which is kind of like we talk about shame, fear and guilt, or they talk about not even shame, fear and guilt, but like, I want to feel worthy or safe concept. It's not an emotion. The isness of what things are. Presence. It's a level of consciousness that's very different than trying to prove yourself to be worthy, trying to attract love. Whose fault is it? The stories are where you can begin to get free, and the stories have in it charged emotion. Does this make sense? That's why a lot of the coaching that I do, it's about nerve somatic experiences of feeling into what's coming up for you and then accepting that emotion instead of trying to change it. And then becoming aware of what beliefs might be on autopilot that are causing that to be felt. And how you can become free by simply letting go. Now, for those of you that haven't heard as well, I am doing something starting on November 3rd to basically showing like my coaching style, showing like how I coach people. It's for both coaches and aspiring coaches that want to go full time with their purpose and want to learn a process that they can use with their clients to get them powerful results. So it's either for new coaches that have never done it before but feel a calling to this kind of work or coaches that want to take their stuff to the next level. So if that's you, you can respond CCA. It's just the letters CCA. And you could just comment CCA for the magic. It's literally a $2,000 course for free. And then you go through it. It's a 3-week process. It's not for people that just want to, like, watch videos. It's for people that actually go through the process. There is an application process for it. So you do apply, but today or tomorrow is the last day of people from my audience getting moved to the front of the list to be approved for it. After that, it's going to like the public and stuff like that. So it's people from my audience will get first dibs on getting approved for it because it's a $2,000 course for free. And then yeah, basically you're going through as a beta, beta launch, beta, be the first to go through it. And it comes with live hot seat coaching, meditations, breathwork. Curriculum each week that's Unleashed. Anyways, if you're interested in that, you'll see it there. But yeah, a lot of what I talk about is around everything we're mentioning. It's, it's around being present, not trying to change to get away from where you are, feeling the unfelt emotions from the past. But to feel more worth— like worthy and safety is a concept. And what a lot of times we might actually be looking for is to feel calm and regulated, to feel present to what is. Because if you think about it, people that aren't calm and regulated, there's a feeling normally that they need to control the environment. 'Cause someone could hurt them. This could happen. This could happen. So they're in survival. There's not an acceptance of what is or a trust in what is. So it's really about a trust in the present moment. It's about a calmness in the present moment. So understanding that love, joy, and peace is your natural energy. It's who you really are. That when it comes to the lower vibrational emotions of attachment, that we're attached to. That's what keeps us in that stuck energy. And when you let that go, you become free. That's where everything can begin to shift. So you don't have to have affirmations that bring you up here. It's more about being aware of the attachments that are holding you back. Now, one of the most powerful meditations I have on my channel that literally has almost 3 million views that will show you how to release this energy and how to feel in this love, joy, and peace that you naturally are is a meditation on raising what is called your dominant vibration. It has to do with letting go of this to allow yourself to be who you naturally are. Do this meditation for the next 21 days. Read the comments to see what's possible and watch what happens.