Why NO Agenda Makes you ATTRACTIVE (Easily DETACH)

When there is no agenda or attachment to outcome, why is it that things tend to come to you easier than ever? And when you have an agenda or you have a certain expectation for how you want things to go, how you want people to respond to you, and when there's an attachment there especially, why is it that that creates resistance and it literally blocks the thing from coming into your awareness. These are subconscious things that when you become aware of completely can shift your energy dynamic. And think about it for a minute. The most magnetic people you know have a certain degree of non-attachment to outcome. They're not trying to control their being. They're present to the moment. And when someone is present to the moment, there's an energy about that because there's presence there. So anytime we are— have an agenda, and an agenda means an expectation to an outcome, an agenda means also for many people it's a coping mechanism from childhood that says, I will feel safe once I receive and get this thing. It's a control mechanism. It's a control mechanism that the ego uses to stay in familiar territory. And examples of this are very simple. One I've been using lately is like when you go into a store and you can tell that the person that works there really wants you to buy something. And what happens is if you walk into a store and it's like, hello, how are you? And you, there, you can tell that they're maybe seeing you as like a, almost like a notch of like making their sales day or something. And there are when you become aware of this, you can feel that energy. And when you switch the energy or when that salesperson switches the energy and they're there, they're still present, doesn't mean they're not present or they're not doing their job. It just means the energy from which they're doing it can switch, but there's a different agenda. Like if you imagine you go on a date with someone and there's a subconscious control mechanism there that's like, I want this person to validate me, I want them to choose me, et cetera, et cetera, there's an energy of resistance there. There's an expectation. You could even say there's a form of manipulation that is happening there. You're trying to get them to meet your needs. There's an agenda. And when you have an agenda for somebody else and someone else can feel that, What do we naturally do when we feel like we're being controlled? We rebel. So you could say that when there's an attachment to outcome, that literally blocks the realization of that thing. Energetically, subconsciously, it also blocks that person from giving you what they actually may have given you if that resistance wasn't there. Because if you think about it in the form of the 11 to 15 million bits of information that are around us, but we can only perceive of 100 bits per second, the 100 bits per second, it's literally like everything you want is already around you. It's just, you can't perceive it because you want it And because you want it, that's the 100 bits per second that's taken up your awareness. And want implies lack. So there may be people around you that would naturally validate you, but because you're not validating yourself, you can't perceive it because that's all people do anyways is they reflect back aspects of ourself. And when we're not attached to whether they do or not, that's where magnetic energy is. Does that make sense? You could even say the most powerful mantra that I've been sharing lately. You're good either way. You're good either way. You're good whether something happens or doesn't happen. You're good either way. It's a neutral thing whether it happens or not. Only the ego in survival believes that if it happens, then it can feel good. Does this make sense? So if you have questions, go ahead and put questions in the Q&A box. I'm gonna be answering questions. You can comment the questions and understand that the process, let's see what comes through, let's see the questions, but understand that the process of really what this is when it comes to agenda and attachment to outcome, it's a resistance from the present moment. It's a resistance to what it is and it's a belief that you have to control to feel safe. You see, how do you not get passive with being good either way? Well, the key here is not that you don't chop wood and carry water. It's not like I'm saying, yo, don't chop wood, don't carry water. Just chill, bro, it's all good. You're good either way. What I'm saying is you still chop wood, you still carry water. There's a saying that goes, before enlightenment, chop wood and carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. It's not that what you do changes, it's that the way in which you do it is what shifts. So passive, think about the question too. How do you not get passive? Who's to say that if you're good either way and not attached to outcome, that that means you're being passive? It's not active to desire and want and resist and attach. I can be good either way, whether great content comes from that 8 hours of speaking, 6 hours of speaking. If I'm attached to, I want to get good content, I am then in an agenda. I have an agenda and everybody in the crowd is a pawn to my agenda, which doesn't feel so good, right? So what happens is I've recognized through the past as well that the best content comes when I am intending to simply connect, add value, have fun, and be present. Do you see the difference there? But I'm not trying to manipulate everyone in the crowd to give me what I want. It's the same way if I had a 9-to-5 sales job and I was like, I go into work when I used to sell women's shoes and my intention was, I want to sell $5,000 of shoes today. I want to make more money. I want to, everyone that I help then becomes an agenda, part of my agenda towards me filling up myself and fueling up me. I manipulate it. It's a manipulative tactic. But instead, when I would go into work with the intention of helping or adding value or connecting with people or expressing my true self and being present, those were the best days anyways. Isn't that interesting? Same thing with doing live events. I can be good either way. Now this doesn't mean I'm being passive. I'm still showing up. My focus is on getting in a flow state, adding value to people. I would say it's a more pure intention that doesn't have so much survival ego energy in it. Who's to say that? Here's another part of the question. How do you not get passive with being good either way? Well, think about this. Is it passive if you are trusting the divine? And you are allowing yourself to still take action, but you're not attached to the results or the outcome. The ego believes— here's the question is coming from the ego, which believes it needs to control. It needs to stay in survival mode to be productive. So being good either way is about not being attached to outcome because you're honest with yourself You don't need to control the outcome. It's not your job. It's not your job. It's like Mac Dre, it's not my job. The context of that song, by the way, is very inappropriate for the context of what I'm talking about, but it's not your job, okay? It's not your job to control outcome. That's the new mantra. It's I'm good either way, or that's not my job. You look at like boundaries with other people, you're like, it's hard for me to set boundaries with other people because when I set boundaries with people, they feel tension or they might not feel good. Well, guess what? That's not your job. It's not your job to manage their emotions. That's not your job. Do you see the difference there? Yeah, you're good either way and that's not my job. Does that mean you're being passive? No. Remember, before enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. Whether I run a live event or not and I have an attachment to getting good content or how the content comes out, that's an agenda, that's an attachment to outcome. Creates resistance. Starts to feel like everyone's a pawn in my movie versus just showing up and being present. Different energy, right? How does bad people get what they want? Then they have an agenda. Um, you're not— see, that's not your job. That's not my job. That's not my job. I wish I could play part of this. That's very soft for you guys. It's so ridiculous. Um, so it's not your job. To manage what bad people do and what they want 'cause they have an agenda. The key is focusing on you. The key is focusing on what your intention is. It'd be like if I was like, it's also maybe a belief that other people have the power to control you, manipulate you, and like you don't have the awareness of that. But like if I'm, I don't know, let's see an example. I was a salesperson selling women's shoes and I have an agenda of helping other people. What about all the other bad salespeople that have an agenda? What about them? I don't know. It's not my job. That's not my job. So an agenda, you becoming aware of your own agenda. Yeah, exactly. And trusting the divine, trusting the divine. So What is the most powerful manifestation technique? I believe that manifestation is a— how do I want to say this? I don't really make manifestation content anymore. I don't. You might hear that and say, well, Aaron, but don't we create our own reality? No, you don't create your own reality. That's like saying, it's a different perspective that I'm giving here, okay? This goes under this idea and this analogy that I heard recently, I've been using a lot. Do you make a plant grow? Can you make a plant grow? Can you? You can water the plant, you can put it in the sun, you can sing to the plant, but can you make it grow? No, you can't. You don't make it grow. Let's be honest. God makes it grow. And when we talk about manifestation, what people want is they want the most powerful manifestation technique that their ego can use so that the ego can control reality. And if the ego can control reality, it can feel safe in what it believes is familiar. And what I'm saying is when you surrender to the divine or God and you are in alignment with who you choose to be, when you're following your purpose and your passion, when you're learning, 'cause here's the thing, if I give you the most powerful manifestation technique, which might shift, it's basically like, this is when you also get into quantum physics because manifestation technique is a mechanism to control reality and also it's like a permission slip that allows you to perceive of out of the 11 to 15 million bits of information around you, 100 bits per second is what you can perceive of. It's like I give myself permission to manifest and to think and to control, but it's like it adds resistance into the field. The idea is like it can be a permission slip for you to perceive of that. But what I'm saying is that when you surrender to the divine or God, more magic happens. Doesn't mean you don't have intention, doesn't mean you're not present in the moment, it's just coming from a deeper place. What I would ask you is the things that you want to manifest, what are you avoiding taking action with? What are you, and what emotions are you avoiding from feeling? There's the shadow work side of it. It's a more holistic view that I have. I'm not saying thoughts don't correlate with what you experience. I'm not saying intention doesn't influence reality. It does. But the level of consciousness that a lot of people come from when they're trying to manifest is this kind of like energy where it's like bypassing emotion, bypassing feeling negative emotion or shadow work. And I believe it's more holistic. Focus more on who you are being. Focus more on the energy of who you are being, your internal self-image, but being it and allowing God to flow through. Does that make sense? That's why I don't make manifestation content anymore because it's like, it comes from the ego's desire to control reality and its lack of trust in the divine, in God. That doesn't mean you don't take action. That doesn't mean you don't have intention. It doesn't mean you don't have goals. It's just that there's a new level of attachment to it where you're not attached in the same way. Does that make sense? And a lot of times people want the manifestation technique to escape where they are, and they want it to be really easy, like 6-minute abs or something. I'm not saying it can't— it has to be hard. I'm saying that focus more on the process. Focus on enjoying life until you get the manifestation. Does that make sense? So that's kind of my perspective about it. So yeah, there's more of like, I think it's also more of like a soul connection thing too. When in an interesting way, karma, I believe if there is karma, which I do think there's a balance in reality to like the actions we take and stuff, part of karma I think is connected to attachment. So one thing that I think keeps us in this realm reincarnating over and over again is a form of attachment. It's attachment to things, things we want, desire. So desire and attachment is the root of all suffering. It's something that Buddha said. And I believe that a lot of life, and why I'm passionate about talking about non-attachment or letting go, is because I think it's also the key to relieving karma. When you let go of all these things you're trying to control in reality so that you can control how you feel, and when you let go of certain desire, it's like you can then focus on God and the divine where more magic happens. For many people, I think manifestation is a way of not trusting the unknown because there's so much more clarity and feeling of, I can be safe if I can visualize it and then feel it and then experience it. I have all the steps along the way. It's very certain. I know what's going to happen in the future because I'm manifesting it now. Think about that. Isn't that interesting? So it's a way of robbing yourself from the unknown and the magic of God. What if that's what God is, by the way? What if what God is, it's just the unknown and everyone shields them from the unknown because of manifestation? I'm going to manifest what I want. I'm going to think about it. I'm going to think about it. I'm going to feel it. I'm going to visualize it and then I eventually experience it. This is how I stay in familiar energy. I am wiring it in, I'm wired it in. I know what to expect, I know what to expect. And you're siphoning out the unknown from reality. Like God is all around you at any given moment, just waiting for you to surrender, to allow the energy to flow through. But it's like, no, I will manifest it. I will think about it and I will experience it. I know, I know, I know. It's familiar, it's familiar, it's familiar. And then God and the divine is all around you and you're like, I can't see you. I'm only looking at my manifestation. So we rob ourselves of the divine, of the unknown. Yeah. So desire comes in faster when you have desire. Desire is an energy that can move things, but a lot of times the desire itself can then become the thing that blocks that thing from coming into your life. Like very often people, when do people find themselves in relationship? When do they attract love? Is it when they want it, they want it, they want it? Like Ariana Grande when she's like, "I want it, I got it, I want it, I got it." You know that song, "I Want It, I Got It." Imagine she's just like, "I want it, I want it, I want it, I want it, I want it, I want it." Desire, desire, desire, desire. No, eventually she moved into the energy of gotting it. She didn't want it forever, right? But a lot of times what people do is they want, so the wanting can get you the gotting, but if you stay attached into the wanting and wanting, the wanting, the wanting, which is what a lot of people do because it's a mental construct and they want it, they want it, they want it. When does it happen in relationship? A lot of times people attract love when they are not looking, they're surrendered. They're just being, they're having fun, they're in an experience. Like they're not trying to control something to work. It just kind of happens. It's surrender. Exactly. Does that make sense? It's like that staircase. Is that a sexy staircase? Oh my God, look at that staircase. I love staircase. Me too. How should the manifestation look like? You should think about it, you should visualize it, and it should look exactly how you think and visualize it because the unknown is scary. We don't want the unknown to come in through the back door. We don't want that. We want to manifest with our hands at the throat of the universe. Control reality, manifest it, manifest. Mani means hands, manifest it. Or you just let go and you focus on who you are being. You follow your passion, your purpose. You learn what you're meant to learn. I think a lot of times with manifestation too, what are you avoiding? Are you avoiding certain lessons? Are you avoiding feeling uncomfortable emotion that's coming up because you don't want to manifest something bad? If I feel shame or guilt or anger, I'm gonna manifest something bad. But if you would let yourself feel those emotions and be present with that part of you, you would then allow emotion to process. 'Cause here's the thing, here's the thing, you ready? A lot of times manifestation is coming from the conscious mind, which runs 10% or less of your life. So you can consciously think about what you want, consciously feel what you want, But 95 or 90% of your life is ran by your subconscious mind. So you can avoid the anger, the shame, and the guilt that's under the surface, but guess what? It's still there. And then you say, well, I'm consciously thinking about what I want, I have goals and all these things, but I feel blocked. It's self-sabotage. What you call self-sabotage is just the subconscious mind that's addicted to familiar. It's the subconscious mind of what you're not allowing yourself to feel. What emotions are you avoiding? And when you're trying to manifest, a lot of times you are maybe avoiding the present moment emotions that are there. Huh? What do you think? Yes? No? So this is why you might feel blocked. So how do you change your subconscious mind? Subconscious mind runs 90% of your life or more, probably 95%. And that's why a lot of what I'm talking about when I talk about focusing on the divine and God is it loosens up the ego's desire to control the 10%. Think about that. I want to manifest, I'm gonna manifest from an ego-conscious way, which only controls 10% of my life. Think about that. 5%, it's more like 5. I keep saying 10, it's like 5%. Like people are like, I want to manifest my dream life and I'm gonna do it by thinking, 'cause I like certainty. So I think a lot of times when people are really attached to manifestation, they're addicted to certainty and control. So I'm gonna think about it, I'm going to feel it and I will experience it. All along the way, I know what to expect. Boom, boom, boom. No room for the unknown. And also you have all this pressure because you've confused and started to believe that you can make a plant grow. You can't. You don't make the plant grow. You water it, you put it in the sun if you can, if it's in a pot or something, but you don't make it grow. God does that. You want to set the conditions up for the plant to grow. That's the only thing you have the ability to control. And you can set the conditions up to influence your subconscious mind by also surrendering the control over the 5% of the conscious. You believe your ego needs to figure it out. You let subconscious patterns keep you in the conscious. In beta, and those subconscious patterns might be people pleasing, trying to fix other people, control mechanisms you might use, which are all also people pleasing, fix-it patterns. These are all ways in which you try to control reality because the conscious part of you wants to stay in familiar territory to childhood. So one thing that I recommend when it comes, I'm a big proponent of Carl Jung talking about like inner child work and archetypes in our consciousness. Dream work is very powerful. However, when you think of your inner child, if you imagine your inner child is knocking on your front door, your inner child's at the front door and your inner child might be feeling shame, fear, guilt, or anger. And you open up the door, there's your inner child just looking up at you. And what do most of us do energetically to that inner child? We tell them to go away. We're ashamed of it. We don't invite them in and like nurture them. We say, I don't want other people to see you. You're kind of embarrassing. This needy part of you, this anxiety, I don't want to feel it. So I'm going to consciously control it and put you into the neighbor's house or over there off to the side. And we reject the inner child part of us. We reject the emotion that we could feel. And the thing is, is people then say, well, I learned a manifestation technique and if you feel negative thoughts and emotions, you're gonna manifest something negative and that you don't want. Well, guess what? You're gonna attract it anyways because it's 90% of your life is in your subconscious mind. You see? You see? It's gonna happen anyways. You just, it's like you're subconsciously, you're like subconsciously just not aware and you think you're controlling it. You're under the illusion that you're controlling reality because you're suppressing or repressing shame, fear, guilt, and anger that's coming up. And what I'm saying is accept it and invite it in. That inner child part of you may have never had closure, may have not felt validated, and the only reason you might be looking for validation on the outside from external reality, from other people, Instagram, et cetera, is because that inner child that is at the front door, you're not paying attention to and you're not validating. Just saying. If you were to validate that part of you, if you were to validate that part of you, you might not crave validation approval from other people, not nearly as much. And that's in your subconscious. Like this little thought experiment of asking yourselves, like imagine your inner child at the front door. What emotion haven't you allowed yourself to feel? You open up the door, there that part of you is. That's your subconscious connecting using your imagination to that part of you. That's influencing your subconscious mind. You can become aware of what your subconscious is telling you in the moment about your inner child of what emotions you haven't allowed yourself to feel. And what I'm saying is actually feeling those emotions is the gold. And you might say, well, manifestation says if you feel it, you're gonna manifest something bad. Okay, well, if you don't feel it, if you don't feel it, it'll be under the surface still attracting to you different people, different things that reflect it. You could say, well, okay, people pleasers wanna please everyone else except for themselves 'cause they don't think they're worthy of it. They may be avoiding tension. They may be avoiding stepping into their power. They're avoiding things by being people pleasers. Because they've made it their job to fix everybody else. They might feel good when they do that. There's these subconscious motivations. So you say, okay, I'm not gonna feel tension or negative emotions. Well, you're gonna carry it under you and you're gonna attract more and more people that test your boundaries. You're gonna attract more and more people that are hard to please. Why? Because you're a people pleaser and you like to play the game. What is the game? The game is I notice tension in my environment, which comes from a childhood pattern. And the game is how many of these tensions can I alleviate? So you go around like, I will please you, I will please you, I will please you. And then you do get a hit from it every time though. You get a little bit of like, ooh, see, I did a good job. Ooh, see, I did a good job. Ooh, see, I did a good job. And then now every of these people, they need me. Codependency. They need me. They're gonna keep me around. They're never gonna leave because who else would please this many people? That's a subconscious pattern under the surface. So you could say, I'm gonna manifest reciprocal relationships. You don't play the game of reciprocal relationships. Let's be honest. You don't. You like to play the game of imbalanced relationships. You say, no, Aaron, I don't like it. Yeah, you do. There's a part of you that does. There's a part of you, that's the hard thing to see. There's a part of you that gets something from it. The thing that you get from it is also the subconscious. I'm just trying to break you free. That's why we're not just talking about the conscious mind of manifestation, the 10%, 5% of life that you can control from the ego's perspective that just wants to survive, by the way. And what I'm saying is start to work with your subconscious because here's the thing about your subconscious, it speaks in symbols, it speaks in energy, And by imagining the inner child that comes in front of you when you open up the door, the emotion you're not allowing yourself to feel, you can become aware of this other aspect of you. Does it make sense? So basically what I'm saying is if you want to really transform your life, It's about realizing that embracing the emotion is powerful. And then also become aware of the ego's desire to control, the ego's desire to manifest, to think about what it wants, to feel what it wants, to then experience what it wants. And it's like, I control at every level of the process. I know what to expect and I can feel safe in that because in the scary unknown, which is where God is, but in the scary unknown, I don't, want the unknown 'cause in the past maybe something happened that came outta the unknown and now I'm traumatized from that. You're blocking God from coming into your life, the divine. You are. And what I'm saying is I'm just trying to break you free from the 10%, 5% of the conscious mind that's trying to control and create, believes it creates reality. See, I create reality. 5% of your conscious mind controls, that's it. There's like 5% of your conscious mind only controls 5% or has 5% influence. 95% of the influence is from your subconscious mind. That subconscious mind speaks in metaphors and symbols and inner child work allows you to connect to that energy to become aware of what's there. Meditation allows you to get into a theta state, which has much more impact on the subconscious mind. If you're in survival mode and you're in beta brainwave state, you're not going to— you could say, I create reality. No, you don't. You don't create reality. That conscious part of you wants to believe it creates reality because it doesn't trust the 95% of the subconscious and the 95% of the unknown. Doesn't trust God. And at the fundamental core, you can't make a plant grow. And because you can't make a plant grow, like, stop trying to play God. I create reality. Who is the I that creates reality? I believe that God is flowing through you, and when you are in alignment with a vision greater than yourself, when you have the intention of adding value, when you are present to the moment, you are allowing that energy to flow through and it is not you doing it. Not the you that you're talking about with the 5% ego construct that's trying to control reality. I'm just trying to break you free. That's all I want. I want you to break free. What is the control mechanism in your life that's predominating? People pleasing is a control mechanism. It's a mechanism you use to control tension in your life. And what I'm saying is become aware of that. Become aware of what you're doing. Be honest with yourself. You get payoffs from it. Just trying to break you free. It's just that those subconscious payoffs you might not be aware of until you maybe contemplate it. Just trying to break you free. If I could break you free, I will feel really good about myself. I will have done my job. There's no agenda, but literally you allow the divine to flow through you and you know God is what allows the plant to grow. The consciousness of the plant, like the divine, whatever you want to call it, but it's not you. And if you had the pressure, if imagine you have the pressure to keep all the, I make all the plants grow in reality. I have to run around, water all the plants. No, you don't. It just naturally happens. God also has clouds and weather and all of these things that happen in reality that you don't have to do nearly as much as you think. The only reason you think you make a plant grow is because you tear it out of the ground and put it in your house. 'cause it looks nice. And then what you have to do is you have to keep it alive, but you don't make it grow. It just grows. You're just trying to set up the conditions so that you can enjoy it in your house. Make sense? So what have we concluded so far? The unknown is where God is. The unknown is where all magic happens. The ego wants to control because the ego wants to stay in familiar energy. The subconscious mind controls 95% of your life. That's kind of like the unknown. The 5% of your life is the conscious mind. Most people want to manifest and they want to manifest because they want to think about what they want. They want to then experience what they want because they feel it and then they can experience it. Known, known, known. No room for the unknown. I just want to stay in what I know. I will think about it. I will feel it. I will then experience it. It's so certain. The 5% of the conscious mind is creating this. And then you realize, I'm not going to feel shame, fear, guilt, or anger. Instead, I'm going to put it under the surface. Well, guess what? 95% of your life is ran by that. So people pleasers find themselves subconsciously in a game where they're trying to please everybody. Can I please you? Can I please you? Can I please you? And then you don't know what reciprocal relationships are because You like to please people. There's a payoff you get for pleasing people. You get to ease the tension. You get to create codependency because everyone needs you. You say, I'm a good person, Aaron. No, it's 'cause I'm a good person. You might be good to everyone else, but you are abandoning yourself. You are a bad person. And you say, no, I'm not, Aaron. Don't call me bad. I don't wanna be bad. You experienced a bad authority figure growing up probably, And that's why you are so resistant to someone that's bad. You don't wanna be bad 'cause you don't wanna be like them. Well, guess what? What you perceive of as bad, some of, not all of it is bad, let's be honest. You now think it's bad to set boundaries. You now think it's bad to let someone sit with their own emotions. You now think it's bad to let someone process their own stuff. You think it's your responsibility 'cause you're good. Ooh, we're lost in concepts. Doesn't it feel so good to be lost in concepts? Good, I am worthy, I am not worthy. These are just concepts. You are both worthy and not worthy at the same time. It's a concept. Everything just exists. God energy flows through you. The plant is not more worthy. I mean, the only reason we think a rose is more worthy than a weed is because of the meaning we give it. Imagine a reality where weeds are celebrated, more poetic in some way. It's a concept that makes one more worthy than the other. So then you say, well, I feel not worthy, I wanna feel worthy. So I'm worthy, I'm worthy, I am worthy. No, I say instead of trying to feel worthy, realize it's all a game that you don't have to play. You don't have to prove yourself to other people. You are not more worthy than anyone else or less worthy than anyone else. You're connected to God. The ego is what's trying to do this, by the way. I am worthy, I'm not worthy. Then what happens is something in spiritual community especially where you say, well, I'm gonna become very high vibration. I'm gonna become extra worthy. I'm gonna do all the personal development growth. I'm gonna feel super, super worthy, be super, super worthy and super, super awesome, make super, super money so that everyone thinks I'm super, super, super awesome. And you can do all of that stuff. It's all the ego's desire to control. But then you also create something called grandiosity. I am better than everyone else because I've accomplished these things. And it creates this dissonance. It's also, you call that pride. There's shame and then there's pride. Pride is connected to the ego that's trying to control. What if you just gave up the game of worthiness? Huh? Give it up. Who are you trying to prove yourself to? I could say the sun exists, the plants and the bees and the trees all exist, and because they exist, they are worthy, and because that means you're worthy too. Just a concept. I'm just trying to break you free from the concept. Why are you trying to prove that you're worthy? Who you proving it to? Yourself? Mom and Dad? The bad authority figure as a kid that made you decide to be a people pleaser? Ain't I saying Why you do that? Why you do that? Trying to prove your worthiness. Why you do that? I feel not worthy. I am worthy. I am so worthy. I do affirmations in the mirror and I go, I am worthy. I am worthy. I am awesome. And I feel pride and really good about myself because my ego needs to control reality. And if I can believe I'm worthy, then I'm finally going to be worthy of the perfect job. You don't have to prove yourself. You're just playing the game. You are literally playing the game because you're choosing to play the game. Just like a people pleaser plays the game of trying to please other people because they've chosen to play the game. They decided when it was a kid to survive, it's, I gotta play this game. There's tension and chaos in the family. How can I please and make it go away? And now you're an adult still playing the same game. I'm just trying to break you free. Maybe it's time to stop playing that game. The game of trying to prove yourself. The game of trying to control reality. The game of believing that you can grow a plant. You think you grow plants. It's cute. It's so cute. You take a plant outside, you bring it in your house, you put it in a pot. You water it, you put it in the sun, just the right amount, close enough to the window that it gets enough but not too much sun because then it'll die. And you're like, I grew the plant, I did this, how do I have a green thumb and keep growing plants? And you've confused growing the plant with setting the conditions up for the plant. Your job is not to grow the plant, that's God's job, which happens naturally too. There's an intelligence of its own. But you think you got to do it. You're playing the game of watering the plants. You watch the movie The Secret, and when I watch the movie The Secret, I realize I get to think about it and experience it and feel it and then experience it in reality. You're just playing the 5% ego game. 5% of your conscious mind controls 95% of your life. So imagine that if you knew when you saw the movie The Secret or you listened to like all this, like imagine all of these things around manifestation, which is 5% of the conscious mind that wants to control reality 'cause it wants to control and not go in the scary unknown. And imagine it's like you're gonna watch the movie The Secret and you're gonna watch and listen to this teacher, but only 5% of everything, the most control you're gonna have is 5%. You are going to influence your life, but only the 5%. You'd be like, oh, that doesn't sound very tricky. I wanna control more than 5%. I want to be in more control than just 5%, Aaron. Okay, well guess what? 95% of your life is ran by your subconscious. And what I'm saying is instead of avoiding the emotion that's coming up and avoiding the fear, the anger, the shame, the guilt, I'm saying welcome it in. Let it be there. Become aware of the game you're playing. What game are you playing? What game are you playing? Are you playing the people pleaser game? The fix it game? I'm gonna fix other people. What game are you playing? You might not even be aware you're playing the game. So become aware of what the game is. That's part of it 'cause that's the subconscious coming to the conscious. Most people pleasers say, "I am a good person. I fix other people. I please other people. I am good." That's the conscious mind that's stuck in a pattern. That's a pattern. You're being ran by a pattern. That's not even you, that's a pattern. You're living in a pattern. You're living in a pattern, let's be honest. And that pattern is running your life because 95% of yourself, you're not aware. Part of influencing your subconscious mind is becoming aware of subconscious patterns. There may be a subconscious pattern where you're trying to please other people, running around, easing tension in your friend group, running around, easing tension, and believing it's your job to ease other people's tension. And all that is is from a kid, you started playing that game, you learned that game, and it was a way of surviving from the ego's perspective, so you'd used it. It worked somewhat. It was draining. You take on other people's emotions, but it got the job done. Now as an adult, pleasing other people, pleasing other people, pleasing other people. And then you say, this is just who I am. I am this way. You started playing that game when you were young. You took on that game and you just decided it's who you were. That's what happened. That's not who you are. You are an eternal spiritual being connected to God, but you're playing this little part like, I need people to please me. You're not a people pleaser. I'm just a good per— It's not good and noble to abandon yourself for other people. I'm just trying to wake you up because that subconscious pattern will keep you blind to who you really are. You see? So part of reprogramming your subconscious mind is becoming aware of the subconscious pattern, becoming aware that why do you people please? Why do you try to fix other people? You think it's good because as a kid, it was good to abandon yourself and it was good to ease tension in the family because then you felt safe. And the breakthrough is when you realize that you get something out of it. You get to stay in familiar energy, you get to feel like you're a good person. This is where you can break free. And maybe there's emotion you're avoiding feeling. A lot of times people pleasers have a lot of stored up That's why they say passive, they become passive aggressive. There's aggression there. There's anger on the inside subconsciously there. Okay, you're going to manifest 5% of your life is ran with your subconscious. 5% of your life is ran from your conscious mind. So just suppress and repress the aggression and anger you feel and just manage everyone else's emotions and attract anger in people that you have to manage because you won't manage it within yourself. Let's be honest, you're afraid of your own emotion and energy, and that's why you distract yourself with pleasing everybody else. I know it's not easy to look at, but that's why you attract those kind of people, 'cause you take it on the job and it's energy that's gonna come out in your life somehow. And until you own that power, find every people pleaser or nice person is an incredible amount of power that they're afraid of. They're afraid of the anger that's underneath the surface. Anger is also a boundary. This is okay, this is not okay. But you're afraid of it 'cause you don't want other people to feel tension because their tension is your tension because as a kid, that was the game you played. And what I'm saying is part of transforming your life is becoming aware of the 95% that runs your life, the subconscious patterns and energies. When you start bringing those subconscious patterns and energy into the conscious, you have ability to do something about it. And when I say do something about it, I mean feel the emotion that you've been avoiding feeling. The only reason you are avoiding and you are going into people pleasing everybody else, part of it is that you get to avoid working on yourself and feeling the emotion that comes up. Become a project. Fixers, same thing. You can fix other people. You can feel really, really good about yourself. What are you afraid of? Exactly. That's the question you want to ask. So accept that emotion. So what are the kind of the summaries of everything we've been talking about today? It's a lot, right? What's the biggest takeaway from today's live so far? So Part of this is realizing that the subconscious mind is running 95% of your life. You can watch the movie The Secret and you can learn how you can think about what you want, you can feel what you want, and then you can experience what you want in the outside. This is all a mechanism you use to control so that you can stay in familiar energies. It's a way of siphoning out the unknown in your life, which is where all magic happens. And it's a way of controlling reality. But remember, you're only controlling from the 5% of the conscious mind. What I'm saying is also use the subconscious. Become aware of these subconscious patterns that are running your life. People pleasing, trying to fix other people, control dynamics, attachment. These are all subconscious patterns. Do inner child work. Talk and communicate with your inner child. Is your inner child real? Is it real? Who cares? Who cares? It's an aspect of your subconscious. Just like Carl Jung would talk about archetypes. Are archetypes real? They're symbols in our reality. Remember, the 95% of your subconscious mind is ran using symbols. That's why dreams are so powerful. Most people don't study their dreams. They don't even try to remember their dreams. Your dreams have an incredible amount of gold in them. There are ways your subconscious mind is integrating reality. They're the lessons you're learning. So the subconscious mind, the subconscious, working with your subconscious, allowing yourself to receive and accept the emotions that come up. What are you avoiding by people pleasing? What are you avoiding by trying to manifest? By believing that you grow a plant. You don't grow a plant. God grows the plant. Your job is to set the conditions up for the plant or to set the conditions up for yourself. You set the conditions up for you by doing your best every day, by following your purpose, by living in integrity, by choosing vulnerability and authenticity over validation. These are ways in which you make your life work and you start taking responsibility for your life. You can keep giving up responsibility and waiting for the universe to give you things and manifest it and blah, blah, blah. What I'm saying is focus more on who you are being. I'm not saying that intention doesn't have an effect on reality. I'm not saying that. I'm saying that people give so much power over to the mental construct of manifestation and it's a control mechanism that 5% of the conscious mind uses. There's 95% of your life is ran from the subconscious. Interact with that shadow work, feeling the emotion as it comes up, accepting the parts of yourselves that are trying to control the 5%. So these are powerful energies to tap into. Vulnerability, authenticity, integrity, looking at yourself, attachment, letting go. These are all things that will change your life more than anything. Your next breakthrough might not be more personal development and thinking about goals and all that. So some of you, it might be, but for many of you, it might be accepting the part of yourself that's running from certain emotions that you're afraid to feel and getting lost in distractions and trying to fix other people, etc. So anyways, this live took on a whole life of its own, didn't it? When I start these lives, there's always like 5 minutes, 10 minutes before I get into a flow state, which is hard 'cause on Instagram it's like that's the agenda attachment to the outcome because then I'm like, I want this live to reach people, but if I start with an agenda of a hook, it feels kind of cringey. But then it's also like at the same time, once I get into a flow state, it takes on a life of its own. Can you guys feel that? 'Cause then I know when lives are resonating with people 'cause people are like, can you please repost this live? Please don't, please make sure you post this live. It's also gonna be going on the YouTube. This is one way I create content now. I got a mic, I do it on YouTube, I just go with the flow. Then it takes on a life of its own, but it also takes on a life of its own 'cause you're here. You are an important component of it. You are special. So what's going on right now? A couple things. London live event, September 26th, 27th, 28th. If you're in Europe, fly. I don't know when I'm gonna do another event in London. We do hot seat coaching, meditations, et cetera. It could be cool. It's also, all these links are in my bio as well. That, I think you just type in London. Other than that, yep. That's, yeah, Amsterdam. I'm gonna go to Amsterdam. I'm gonna go to some places. I don't know if I'm gonna run live events there. It's a lot of energy to run live events. So that's why I'm doing a 3-day in London. So if you want, if you're in Amsterdam, fly to London. It's only an hour away. I'm flying 10 and a half hours to you. You fly 1 hour to me. How about that? How about that? Catch me in London. How about that? Catch me in London, huh? Okay. I think that's it for today. One of the most powerful videos to watch next is a live that I did in Costa Rica on whether a plants can grow or not, whether you actually do it. It's a full explanation of how to allow the divine to flow through, how to shift the inner energy and beliefs around your role in reality that I think will completely transform your life. So watch this video next right here.