why toxic people are attracted to high vibrational people

The more you raise your vibration, the more you will repel people that no longer resonates with the energy you are embodying. Now, the more authentic you become, the more you will repel people that used to resonate with the inauthentic parts of you that you may have used to embody. So what happens is is as you elevate your frequency, there is an effect where you both attract to you people that resonate with that frequency and that new version of you, and you also repel away from you the people that no longer resonate with that new version of you. Now the challenge becomes with, are you attached to the old toxic dynamics that may have felt familiar since childhood. The only time there is challenge with this is when we try to control the process, when we try to hold on to what may no longer be serving us, not realizing that maybe what we're holding on to is not just the person themselves, but maybe the energy they represent to us. Maybe they represent an energy that we feel responsible for. Maybe in childhood it felt very familiar to have someone that you had to mitigate their emotions, that you had to ease tension around, that you had to be a certain way so that they could feel safe, they could feel fixed or good enough. And then you are left feeling drained. You are left feeling like your energy is depleted and maybe there is a familiar energy around that toxic dynamic. Now, as you elevate your vibration, you will be confronted with the necessary component of letting go of what no longer is serving you. And in this video, I wanna show you how to move through that process how to make it easy to detach from old familiar dynamics and things that will allow you to elevate your vibration to a completely new level that will completely change the people you attract into your life, the synchronicities you attract into your life, the abundance, the money, the love, everything. Now, on my journey back in 2012 when I went through my my awakening process, there was a moment where I realized that a lot of the people around me— and not even the people, but a lot of these circumstances around me— were replayed dynamics. There were people in my life that I could see represented a certain archetypal energy that had been familiar since childhood. But when maybe some of these were familiar because they were just similar stories that I had about the way reality worked. And that's why getting to the core of your beliefs about reality could be so powerful in this process. So in 2012, I realized that there was a belief that I had that I had to fight for freedom. There was a belief that I had that women were controlling because as a kid from 7 to 17, The most dominant woman archetype in my reality was a controlling person who was manipulative, controlling, and narcissistic. I felt like I had to fight for freedom. Well, isn't it interesting that then after she left my life when I was 17, there was a certain part of that familiar energy that had been normalized. So there was constantly some person I had to fight for freedom against. If it wasn't an ex-girlfriend who was jealous and I had to, in a way, mitigate their emotions, soothe them in their jealous escapades, kind of tiptoe around the controlling dynamic. Funny enough, broke up with her after 4 years Many, 2 or 3 years longer than need be. But you wanna know what was modeled and familiar as a kid was a dad that stayed in a relationship with a narcissistic, my ex-stepmom, narcissistic person for like 5, 6 years too long. So there wasn't an understanding of that boundary and a cutting off of that energy. If we weren't taught growing up how to cut off or how to distance from energy that is toxic, we will normalize and stay within the field of it. So broke up with her, then get transferred to a better shoe department where the manager is the same personality dynamic as my ex-stepmom. And a lot of the same familiar patterns were intact. When I was a kid, things weren't fair. We had to earn going to school. At the job that I had, Things weren't fair. I had to like earn the schedule that I wanted. Interesting. Not only that, if we were to tell anyone about what was happening in the household when we were a teen, when I was like 10 to 17 years old, I would've gotten more punished. If at that 9 to 5 job selling women's shoes, we went to HR, guess what would've happened? That did happen and we all got more punished. Wow. Similar, familiar childhood dynamics being replayed over and over again. Now, this is an interesting concept that I wanna share that I have not shared before. What if on one hand, it's a familiar pattern that we're attracting, on another hand, what if it's like when two people get into relationship, there is also a projection of subconscious energy from a person that may bring out even more qualities of someone else that was the familiar energy, almost like at a subconscious level. Now, this is gonna sound kind of esoteric. I've shared this a few times, but this is an interesting thing that I always remember and it always stood out to me. You know how there's certain things from childhood, you're like, why don't I remember that? But then you could see that maybe there was a reason Or like there's some thread there, it must have been important. When I had an ex-girlfriend that wasn't narcissistic or anything, after I healed and I basically forgave my ex-stepmom and completely shifted out of that old pattern, which is a huge part of the process, learning to forgive and to in a way let go of the resentment towards the parent that you're trying to earn their love, you're trying to earn their approval, It's interesting when it comes to why are some people attracted to emotionally unavailable people? Well, what if it's because being attracted to emotionally unavailable people is like fighting for your love? It's like fighting for the love and attention of the parent that didn't give it to you. So then you pick people that are in the same pattern. That's why being aware of this pattern is so powerful because then you stop doing that. You stop associating the drama and the highs and lows of, it felt so amazing when that one parent finally gave you the approval and validation. So you keep searching for that, but you end up searching for it in people that can't really give it to you because ultimately it's replaying the familiar dynamic that mom or dad couldn't give it to you. So a big part of that is healing and going to that inner child and part of you and nurturing and soothing that part of you. Now that, okay, there's an ex-girlfriend that wasn't narcissistic or anything. She's actually awesome, really good person, just didn't work out. And one thing that I remember was very interesting is one time we got into like this little argument or whatever you call it where it was, well, it wasn't even an argument, but we were going out to restaurants and eating And there were times we'd go out to a restaurant and I would pay for dinner. And then there were a few times where I was like, if you want to tip, I was like, I got it. But if you want to tip, you can tip. And what was interesting is I never really ever said that in the past. Like, I'll pay and you can tip, which doesn't seem like a big deal. We both made about the same amount of money. We were selling women's shoes and she worked in a sales job as well. But what was interesting is what she told me is what came up for her was that she had an ex who used to do that and it would trigger her because it's like, if you're gonna pay for dinner, just pay for dinner. Don't say you're gonna tip. And that's what her ex would do, is always like, would say, I'll pay, you tip. And then when I said, I'll pay, you tip, I'd never done that before, but it was almost like there was a knowing on the inside that part of it was, there was this resistance to that happening. And it was almost like my energy was able to pick up on it and then do it. Not that I'm blaming it, 'cause it's not even really that, it's not that big of a deal, right? Like, it wasn't a huge deal, but I always remembered that there was like this part of my, I'm like, why did I even say that? I've never said that before. In all the years I've been dating or had, you know, a girlfriend, I've never said like, I'll pay you tip. But there was this like desire to do so when I was with this one person. And also this one person had this trigger around not wanting someone to do that because an ex did that and used to trigger her. I always thought that was interesting. So in a certain dynamic, if you're an empath that sometimes has, you can feel other people's energies and at times you have trouble setting boundaries with people, could it be that not only do you attract narcissistic people, which is very common, because narcissists are always testing your boundaries. But could it be that even if people aren't narcissists, you almost bring out subconsciously certain energy that affects you to where then you need to set boundaries or you feel guilty not setting boundaries? It's like we attract people into our life to teach us certain lessons because we're trying to close the loop. And sometimes that loop to be closed is saying no to a toxic energy. It's setting boundaries with a toxic energy. Because interestingly enough, as I have come into my own power around this and been in my own energy and not tuned to other people, it's like not only did certain people fall out of my life, but then as I stood in my own power, I brought out, there were different versions of the people in my life I was surrounded by. It's almost like I brought a different version of them out. Now, I know this can sound like some egotistical thing, but if you like, like I am affecting the way people, I mean, it's not really. The energy you embody, people are responding to energetically. If you play this person, it's like, what do people think about me? Oh, I feel guilty setting boundaries. They're gonna be able to, in a way, feel that weird energy and they may respond with like, why are you setting boundaries with me? Because they can see that in a way weakness. Or that vulnerability, or maybe they're compassionate about it and you're surrounded by people that are just kind of manipulating the energy anyways. But understand that when you are the star of your own movie, which means you are not a cameo in everyone else's movie trying to mitigate their emotion, you start to come from a certain level of power. And I remember that as I've embodied this energy within myself, as I set boundaries, as I went through this big transformation about, 3 years ago now, where I realized there were things I hadn't said to certain people in my life. So I literally one day got up and started having a whole bunch of phone calls with people. And there were certain people that fell outta my life, and there were some people that I reestablished a new connection with. There was like more equal respect there. It was a very empowering time. But I realized ultimately that if they felt tension when I was expressing how I felt, it wasn't my thing to manage. Whereas as a kid, it felt like my responsibility to manage other people's emotions. And sometimes the best gift you can give someone else is to let them sit with their emotion. Being the old eldest child in a family of like 6 kids, one thing I've had to learn how to do is how not to try to fix everyone. Because of my success on YouTube and my success in life, I'm successful and able to help people and family members, especially when they need it, if they're not good at money and like having certain things in their life figured out. There's been a tendency in the past to try to fix it for them, to try to help them, and then you end up helping, helping, helping, helping, and they are not learning, learning, learning, learning. And it can be easy to rationalize certain things. Well, I'm the eldest, I am successful, I do have this money, I do have the ability and the resources to help. But one thing I've had to realize is, and I would rationalize it too because certain family members, maybe they didn't have exactly what I had. Maybe they have like different dad or different mom or something and therefore, 'cause like my parents are divorced. So if I have like a brother and sister and they have a different dad than my dad, and I had a dad that was present in the way that he could be and also in general, a good dad. And if they didn't have that, there'd be like a rationalization, like I need to help them, I feel responsible. And then it would be like a rationalized thing where it's like, well, I'm gonna give them this, I'm gonna help them do this, I'm gonna help them do this. But the thing is, is if that's not received or if that's not something, it becomes a level of energy of enabling. And that's what I've had to learn. I've had to learn how to not overgive and not become the dad figure within a family dynamic. And maybe you watching this video, maybe if you're the eldest or if you're the person that's the most spiritually aware in your family, Maybe you're the peacemaker, you're like the middle child or the youngest child that's really sensitive. Whatever it is, you may find yourself taking responsibility for other people's emotions and then feel drained. Well, no wonder. You feel responsible for other people's emotions. That's what guilt is. Guilt is an energy of control. Guilt is used to either control ourselves and to control other people. Think about it. If you feel guilt when you set boundaries with a friend because you don't wanna go to some party or do something for them, guilt is like a way of controlling. Oh, I feel guilty, I'm gonna do something I don't wanna do. But that guilt may have run in your family line for a very long time. There's certain cultures that feel a certain guilt. I remember hearing about certain cultures where, this was interesting, I remember hearing that In Israel, for example, because in Israel there's this long tradition of, you know, where a lot of times certain, you know, in Israel, people may stay in the family for a very long time and stay in the family dynamic of Israel. One thing I thought was very interesting is that if people leave Israel, there's even more of a demand or a guilt around you must be with another Jewish person. And in the Jewish religion anyways, it seems like it's a thing that like, you know, there's like a high demand for that, I guess that moral like connection between having people that have like those same moral values, which is understandable. However, one thing I found interesting is I was told by someone that if you leave Israel, there's even more of a demand to be with someone else that's Jewish because of that guilt. But if you live in Israel, It's somewhat common for people in Israel to be with people that aren't Jewish, but it's okay because you're still in Israel. You never left the homeland. Isn't that interesting? I thought that was interesting. So it's almost like to compensate for the fact that you physically don't live in this place, you must, you know, there's more of a desire to do this thing, maybe so that you don't bring shame to the family, maybe so, you know, there's, there's There's probably layers of the social conditioning in it. It's definitely social conditioning though. And something that is very often used to control someone's behavior within the family dynamic, maybe even the family constellation. But how many times may we do that in our own way? What if you feel, this is called hidden loyalties in family dynamics. What if, for example, your parents weren't successful, and now you feel guilty because you wanna make money or you're starting to become abundant. So instead, there's this sabotaging effect to where you like let go of the money or you make bad investments, not knowing that part of you feels safer if you don't feel like you make your family feel small. Isn't that interesting that we may have these subconscious desires to not shine too brightly? To not make other people feel uncomfortable. This is something that happens when we're trying to create homeostasis in familiar childhood dynamics. And maybe it felt familiar to not have enough. Maybe it felt familiar to not shine, to not have the light on you too much because attention was bad as a kid. You see, as you heal and as you become aware of these energies inside of yourself, you'll break free and then your lesson may be to let go of the energy that has been controlling you to become free, to be who you came here to be, to stop living in the illusion of what everyone else wants you to be when you know in your heart that something isn't right for you. You can feel it. And when it comes to this energy of elevating your vibration, Part of the, you attract yourself around people that will test your boundaries, that you will have to stand up to. Toxic people will dislike you when you start healing that toxic energy inside of yourself and the normalization of that energy towards yourself. You stop rationalizing it as your responsibility. And guess what? It's not a bad thing if certain people dislike you. As a spiritual person, it can be very common that your energy triggers other people. There's a spiritual energy that you may be bringing more into your life, and that may trigger the people around you. But understand, it might not be you that is triggering them. It may be what you represent. Now, I know that the important part of this is the key of this entire video, is that there's nothing wrong with you, that your, the belief that there's something wrong with you, which is called shame, it's like an internalization of it. Understanding that maybe what you represent that triggers other people. When it comes to spirituality, for me, it's like I know that when I see someone that leaves a positive comment, I'm very slow, I guess you could say, to, when I see positive comments, I don't even really internalize those completely because I know that the videos I put out and the information I put out is a reflection for people of something they could learn about themselves. It's not me as some guru Aaron Doughty person talking in third person. But at the same time, the reason that helps me, 'cause I see it more as energies coming through me, and I see as that everyone has the ability to do this, and it's more of like a symbol for people. If they resonate with the content, get the reflection they need and they like that. So it's not necessarily like I'm finally good enough because I made some content that people may resonate with. But at the same time, that means when there's a negative comment and someone's like, screw this guy with long hair, thinks he's Jesus, which is a complete projection because I do not think I'm Jesus, even though I have long hair. And the long hair may trigger people, but that's, I don't know. Do you see what I mean? It's like people project, but I'm not like, oh, am I trying to be Jesus because I have long hair? Oh my God. No, I don't. Like, whatever, that's someone else's belief. Or someone that's like, oh, this is New Age stuff, it's against— well, you know, they have these like weird— not weird, but beliefs that like anything that has to do with spirituality is the worst thing ever is, you know, devil stuff. If that's their belief, that's their belief. It's not like I question myself. What am I doing? So I don't identify with it. It's like if somebody tells you— if somebody were to come up to me and go, Aaron, your purple shirt and your purple hair is so ugly. I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. It triggers me. And I'm like, okay. Well, I'm not wearing a purple shirt, so this must be your stuff because I don't agree with the reality where I'm wearing a purple shirt, so I don't internalize it. And even if someone's like, I hate your black shirt, oh my God, you're black, you're ugly, I don't like it, it triggers me because somebody, a bully in high school, wore a black shirt and I— whatever, even if they're not aware of that, guess what? That's their stuff. I know that I don't have to internalize it. But being able to hold the energy of not being absorbent of that energy is a very powerful part of this process of evolution. You don't wanna attract everybody. You don't want, you want to repel certain people from your life by you holding your frame, setting boundaries, knowing that a natural part of the process is you will repel people that no longer resonate with you. You will make space for people that can resonate with the real you, don't try to control the process. Just let it be, baby. Just let it be. You don't have to control it. It happens naturally. The universe, God, whatever name you wanna give this magnificent force in our reality, it's doing all the work. It's bringing to you the people that resonate with the deeper you, and it's repelling away from you the people that no longer resonate with you. You don't have to control this process. The more you let go of trying to control it, the quicker, the easier, and the more effortless it will be. There may be still parts that are hard, but that's the letting go of the familiar childhood dynamics. It may not be the person, it may be the energy they represent. And until you learn the lesson, you will continue to attract them. Now, if you want to learn, step by step how to elevate your vibration to another level, I have inside High Vibe School that of a course called High Vibe 101. It's an entire $1,000 course that you can check out inside of High Vibe School, and it will show you step by step how to elevate your vibration, how to set boundaries, how to feel safe inside of your body, how to go through it, a vibrational detox, how to become aware of the dominant stories that are controlling your life. It's a complete, processes to completely transform your life to a higher level in an easy way that is very inside-out transformation so that you attract your dream life and magnetize to you what is meant for you. So if you wanna check that out, you can check it out in High Vibe School. I'll go ahead and link that below. Other than that, if you want a video as well that will show you more on this dynamic from a recent live event, if you can feel other people's energy, you wanna understand the narcissist and empath dynamic, how to transform from the inside out, it's one of my most popular videos from a live event that I did. You can check it out right here. So empaths, people that can feel other people's energy. This is both a superpower and sometimes a curse on the—