Why you should stop being good.

For many people growing up, it may have been bad to choose yourself. It may have been bad to express your emotions. It may have been bad to actually even have needs at all. And because of that, there is this association as adult that it is bad to do these things. What is good is abandoning the self. What is good is easing the tension. And there is such a desire to be good that it is blocking you from authenticity. It is blocking you from connection. It is blocking you from love. It is blocking you from more abundance. And in this video, I'm gonna show you step by step how to go about taking your power back, embracing what you think of as your dark side, and realizing it's not bad. It is actually good. Good. We're gonna be rewiring what good and bad is, and you're gonna learn step by step how this can transform your life in such a powerful way. Now, this video that you're about to see is a live from Instagram that I did where we went deep on this whole entire idea of understanding what you can actually do to transform from the inside out. We talk about why people throw their negative energy at you and what's really happening there. We talk about why whatever you're not changing, you're choosing. We talk about how to reframe negative energy, not shy away from it, not to just think better thoughts. We go deep inside this whole entire Instagram Live. So I highly recommend you watch the entire thing through and see what nuggets are there for you. Good, I wanna be good. And when I'm good, I get patted on the head. I get safety of everyone around me. Everyone, there's no tension because everyone's tension's my tension. But do you see that is keeping you trapped? How much longer are you gonna stay trapped living up to other people's expectations? How much longer are you gonna stay trying to ease the tension? In other people's lives so you can be the good person, so you can be the one that did it, that fixed other people, so that then you fix them, they will never, ever, ever leave you. Because really, when you talk about detaching as an empath, what you're saying is how do you heal the dependent nature on other people living behind this guise of being good. And a lot of times when you start to embrace the shadow side of yourself, what you could call the dark side, what you think of as dark is expressing yourself. What you think of as dark is being in your sense of self. What you think of as dark is living in your own values. But I'm here sharing with you You think it's dark, you think it's bad, it's not. You wanna know what good is? Good, expressing yourself. Good, setting boundaries. Good, these are good things, but they'll appear bad if you're an empath that can feel other people's energies and your job is to mitigate the tension of everyone around you. But guess what else you end up doing as an empath? Feeling pressure. As an empath, you say, I don't like tension, I don't like pressure, but you do. You love it. You love it so deeply, you will carry it with you everywhere you go. You will live under the constant pressure to ease tension around you all the time. You love pressure. You're a pressure maniac. It's just that you've been putting pressure on yourself to be perfect, pressure on yourself to mitigate everyone else's tension. And that pressure, you just get off on pressure. You're like, yes, yes, I will abandon myself even more. Yes, put me up on a cross, right? So what I'm saying All I'm saying is that abandoning yourself, you think is good as a kid because that was what you had to do to get your needs met. What I'm saying is now flip around good and bad. Good is being in your sense of self. Good is expressing yourself. Good is setting boundaries. Good is living by your own values. Bad is abandoning yourself. Bad is putting other people's needs before you because you wanna be good. You wanna look good. You wanna be the good person. I think a lot of times empaths, people that could feel other people's energies, what they do is when they were a kid, they had someone in their life that was controlling or aggressive or there was some form of anger there. So they said, I'm never gonna be like that. I will never be like that because that caused pain. So I will be good. I will be good. I will ease tension. I will be perfect. I will give, give, give, give, give. And if I give, give, give, give, give, I will be worthy, worthy, worthy, worthy, worthy. So my giving is completely in proportion to how much worthy I am. Give, give, give, give, give, give. But then they have trouble receiving, receiving, receiving, receiving, receiving, receiving. What does it mean to receive? What if you could receive from other people because you realize there was give and take there? I realize that sometimes I have a pattern of this with my content. Why? Give, give, give, give, give. 2,000 YouTube videos. I'm give. Don't you guys see I'm a good person 'cause I give so much? Ha. You get to live behind the guise of, look how good I am. I give, give, give, give. And then sometimes, What I do is I, what I'm learning to do is, yeah, it's around charging what things are worth. Sometimes things are devalued when you're like, I'm just gonna give, give, give, give, give, give. And you have all these videos that sometimes people don't apply because they just, I'm gonna watch the next video, I'm gonna watch the next video. No, don't watch the next video. Instead, apply whatever you learn. Create your own videos, I don't know. So how do you detach when you're empath? When you realize it's not your responsibility to ease other people's tension at all. You just thought it was. You've been living under that, you've been living in that pattern. You can let go and realize, embrace being bad, but it's not bad. It's just, you think it's bad. Let's see. Does that help? Does that resonate? Does being more positive stop negative cycles? Well, here's the interesting thing about negative and positive. When you accept the negative, that's a positive experience. Isn't that kind of crazy? Accepting a negative emotion is a positive experience. Rejecting a positive emotion's a negative experience. So what's interesting is being more positive, you can focus on positive, but does it stop negative cycles? Not if you're resisting negative cycles. You're resisting negative cycles, you're keeping them active in your field. So not being afraid of it, leaning into the tension you're avoiding, that's powerful. So does being more positive stop negative cycles? Not necessarily. It can because for a temporary focus, you're like focused on the positive. But what I say is embrace the negative, let it be there. And ironically enough, when you let negative be there, it can then integrate. You see, here's the challenge. People have negative and positive emotions inside of their body. There's a negative part of themselves that they say, no, you are not allowed to express yourself. You're not okay. So that negative says, okay, I'm just gonna stay suppressed inside the body. And then you look at the positive and you're looking at the positive, you're saying, you're good, I like you, you're good. So what happens is you're favoriting the positive, rejecting the negative and saying, does that stop the negative cycles? And that negative part wants to be integrated. And if you accept the negative part instead of reject it, it will then integrate. That's why acceptance can be such a powerful transformation. Make sense? Does it make sense? Does it make sense? Let's see. So yeah. What are you offering for the Vortex event? We're gonna be doing live Q&A, meditations, and it's gonna be focused, it's gonna be more flow dynamic, honestly, but the focus is gonna be on being in your own frame, surrendering, letting go of control, dynamics inside of your body, feeling and shifting your inner self-image. Those are gonna be things we're focused on. So if those of you that just getting in haven't heard, The LA live event is happening on December 7th and 8th, I believe, Saturday, Sunday, and it's in LA, Santa Monica, and there are virtual tickets livestreamed from anywhere in the world and you can join. It's a 2-day live event, or you come in person. There's still some tickets left. It's like 80 or 90% booked up. We just got more rooms, otherwise it would be completely booked up, but not more rooms, we got more, I found out exactly how many people could be there. If you reply Vortex, V-O-R-T-E-X, or you go to the link in my, or I don't know if the link's in bio yet, but it will be. I'm gonna put it in there by the end of this, or not by the end of this, but after this. But Vortex, respond Vortex, I'll send it to you. Let's see. Yeah, so the big thing with empaths is getting in your sense of self. Literally, it felt bad to be in your sense of self. It felt bad to choose yourself. Good is abandon self, make everyone else happy. You flip those and you embrace it, and you will find that you resonate with people in a different way. You will find you show up in a different way. You will find that you are more in your own power. Does that make sense? Does that make sense? I don't know why I'm saying that that way, but I am. Why do people throw negativity upon us? People throw negativity upon us. So people, it's a perspective that people are throwing negativity upon you. Now you could say, well, no, it's actually what they're doing. But what you're doing is That's an unconscious pattern. Now, the way that I started this live is saying anything you're not changing, you're choosing. So what happens is you are absorbing, like there's a subconscious part of you that may have normalized people throwing negative on you. You may feel like it's your responsibility to manage their negative emotion. You may feel like it's what you're worthy of. So subconsciously you're saying, just give it to me, throw it on me, give me the negative energy, I deserve it. I will mitigate it for you. This is what I'm worthy of. And you say, why do people keep doing this? But subconsciously you're like, just give it to me. Do you see the difference there? So how do you stop? Well, first off, realizing subconsciously you may be choosing it. You may be choosing it. It's a pattern that you may feel is in alignment with what you believe you deserve. If you don't deserve it or it's not equal to what you believe you deserve, You will just set boundaries with it and walk away. Does that make sense? Like it won't be part of your reality. You won't allow it. You'll have boundaries with people. You won't allow them into your reality or you'll go away from it. And for a while you might have a certain reflection mirror of that, but you'll eventually shift. So people are not throwing their negativity on you It's more so you're absorbing it. Well, it's like, that's the difference. It's do you, to be disempowered is to be in the story that they're doing it to me. They're throwing negativity upon me. So what happens? They're doing it to me. They're doing it to me. There's a story there. This is unfair. They're doing it to me. You don't have any power, but you have power when you realize you're subconsciously choosing it. You're subconsciously allowing it. Where do I actually wanna put my, energy. You see the difference there? And what I'm intending to do is to help you take your power back. Let go of the story. Let go of believing it's what you're worthy of. Makes sense. Do you agree it's getting stuck in the victim mode? Yeah, somewhat. It's like you're not a leaf in the wind. You can go somewhere else and you could change your story, you could change your belief, you could change the pattern, you could set boundaries, but you have to take your part in it. If you believe people are throwing negativity on you, there's a part of you that has allowed it, and that's what you can change. Otherwise, you're just going around trying to change everyone. Like, please don't throw that at me, please don't throw that at me, please don't throw it at me. That's a big burden. Yeah, so anyways, like I said, yeah, I'm gonna— people are asking, it's not my bio yet. I'm gonna go put it in my bio here in a moment. The LA live event, you can join virtually or in person. Now is the best time to join. And yeah, there's still some in-person tickets left. You can fly. 40% of the people that come to live events normally fly in. So don't feel like, oh, I'm not there. Sometimes people will also say, I'm in San Diego, come to San Diego. Come, if you're in San Diego, we have people that will fly in from Florida and New York to come to LA. And you're like, I'm in San Diego, come to San Diego. No, come up to LA. You're pretty close. Just an hour and a half drive or whatever it is. But I'm not, when I go to different cities to do live events, I'm not gonna be going like to Miami and then go to like Fort Lauderdale. So when people post and they go, hey, come to Fort Lauderdale, no, you're close. I'm not gonna do an event like, you see what I mean? The next live events are gonna be in, so what I'm saying is basically if you wanna come to a live event and you're around the area, it's even easier for you. But most people fly in anyways. Not most people, like 40%. In LA, it might be a little different 'cause there's a lot of people that live in LA, and this one booked up super fast, which tells me there's probably a lot of people in LA that are coming. What was I gonna say? Yeah, the next ones, I'm basically gonna go places I already wanna travel and go to, and then I'll probably just do live events there. So I'll probably eventually do, my next one will probably be in either Sedona, it'll be in LA, 7th and 8th, Comment vortex if you want me to send you the link. There's also a virtual live streaming option. I'll record in HD all the meditations and everything, and you get a replay if you can't make it live. And then Miami, Sedona, probably New York, maybe Tulum or Cancun or something like that. We'll see. Those are the next ones coming up. Anyways, thank you all for being here. I'll be doing more of these lives when I feel like it, of course. And I think that's it. Other than that, I'll talk to you guys later. Peace, much love. No, see Tampa? No, probably not. Tampa is, I'll probably do it in Florida, in Miami, and then it'll be a while before I go to Tampa or something like that. But that's what I'm saying is most people, a lot of people were traveling. So it's, you're closer than a lot of people that may travel, but I'll probably strategically like go different parts of the US, you know? Anyways, that's it for now. Peace, much love, and namaste.