YOUR NEXT 6 Steps To COMPLETELY CHANGE Your Life For 2023

This episode, I'm gonna show you the 6 steps that you can use to completely transform your life in 2022. I'm sure you've noticed 2021 has been a massive year of shadow work, a massive year of letting go. And the challenge is that if we remain holding on to attachment, holding on to certain desires, holding on to certain patterns, we will continue to stay within a bubble reality. We'll continue to stay and experience blocks, We'll continue to be frustrated. We'll continue to stay stuck in the same limiting beliefs and the same reality moving forward. So right now on the planet, it is very important that we make new choices about who we are, that we make the change within ourselves so that we end up on the timeline we want. And in this episode, I'm gonna share those 6 steps that you can take for 2022 that will completely transform your life. I'm gonna share with you what I'm doing in my own life to how I'm gonna transform into 2022 to give you in a way an example so that you can see how you can apply this in your own life. So let's get into that right meow. Welcome back to another episode. Now in this one, we're gonna be talking about the 6 steps to completely change your life. Now, first off, I'm looking at my own life for 2021 and everything that I've been through. And this year was a year of massive shadow work. It was a year of letting go of the people pleaser, nice guy mentality, something that I like kind of took on growing up. It's funny, my dad's here right now. My dad is not in the house at this moment, but my dad is in Austin right now and he's been here for the last couple of days. He had a friend over last night that is one of his like best friends from high school. And he was telling his friend Joe, he was like, Aaron just keeps getting on me talking about this whole like, 'Cause I always ask my dad, I say, Dad, why are you so damn nice? Why are you so damn nice all the time? You know, and my dad goes into this whole spiel about how it's good to be nice and blah, blah, blah, blah. But little does he know, I had to shed the nice guy mentality pretty much all this year because the nice guy mentality is something that is bred out of a lot of times feeling when we're kids, feeling abandoned. What happens is we have a feeling of emotional, physical abandonment. From somebody growing up and then we don't want, we don't feel that validation or that sense of safety so we create it by trying to tune to other people to get other people to then give us validation, support and a lot of times that means that we also are being very nice because if we're nice, they're gonna be nice to us back and that's kind of when I asked my dad about this, I was like, why are you so nice? He's like, well, I just believe that you should treat people the way you wanna be treated but In a way as well, it's like, I believe that if I'm nice, people are gonna be nice back to me and there's gonna be no tension, there's gonna be no negative like energy and that's kind of the purpose behind it. Now the challenge is that being nice a lot of times also creates a lack of polarity because it's not actually authentic in a way, like parts of it. So it's interesting. Anyways, that's a whole longer story but I was asking my dad about this. I had to shed that this whole entire year and what I did to do that is I had to become aware of my own values. I had to become aware of why I was being that way, what I was, you know, 'cause like for my example, my dad, he felt abandoned growing up because my dad's dad was an alcoholic. So my dad's dad didn't show up as much for him and because of that, and also my dad's dad was a very nice guy is what my dad said. Anyways, I think a lot of times this stuff follows in like family patterns and family lines and what I got to do is I got to shed that pattern so that one day when I have kids, it's like they don't have to go through that same type of thing and learn from that, you know what I mean? And even with my dad, it's not a problem or anything, but it's like something I kind of poke at my dad for every now and then because I kind of see that like inside of him, if you were to shed that, it'd be totally different, you know? 'Cause he'd have more boundaries, it wouldn't be as hard to like, it'd be much easier to say no, just stuff like that. But in general, For this year, that was something I let go of. I had to let go of like, that was also connected to, I think, like a needy codependent pattern that I had with like past relationships and stuff like that I've had to let go of. And I've really come into my own center this year. I think that I've embodied more masculine energy now than ever in my life because I'm more in my own frame and I'm leading and it's just completely different. But there's 6 steps that I've completely, I actually put a lot of thought into this And this is also very in alignment with like what I call the shift, you experiencing the shift in consciousness, the shift in reality. This is what I did to completely shift my life. And I'm also gonna share that of the different aspects of my life of different times of what I mean these shifts. So first off, the first step to completely transform your life in 2022 is the first step to transformation in general. That's to become aware of your agreements and have awareness of what these patterns are. It's becoming aware of the meaning that you've been giving things. So when we look at our life, we are living in direct alignment with our meanings and with our agreements. If we work a 9-to-5 job we hate, it's because we've agreed that working this 9-to-5 job that we hate is something that we, We have to work. There's a belief there. There's a story there. Everything in our life is a reflection of the stories we tell ourselves about who we are and what we believe we're worthy of. So the thing with this though is what you wanna do in this step is you wanna be completely honest with where you are and you wanna be honest with what your agreements are and you wanna take ownership and responsibility for them. Because we can work 9 to 5 jobs we hate and we could say, oh, I'm working this job I hate, but I'm only working it because society, society's telling me that I have to work here because I have to pay my bills because my dad and my mom told me this is what I would be best at, you know? And what we could do is be aware that even if somebody gave it to us, we agreed to it. These agreements, this awareness is key to everything. As I always say, 90% of all transformation is awareness. And when you become aware of limiting beliefs, aware of the patterns, aware of attachment, that's when you start the process of transformation. And in this 6-step process I'm sharing with you, this is 6 steps to complete transformation. You will be a different person and you will be embodying different energy by the end of this episode as you keep listening because you will see how these different levels will change different aspects of your life. Now, first off, what the question you wanna ask is, where are you now? You wanna ask yourself, what's not working in my life? What's not working? Now, you also wanna say, how do I feel? What are my predominant emotions? And I'll share with you where I'm at in my life right now and what I'm working through. So right now I'm in a, I'm being honest with myself, right? I've actually created a lot of abundance in my life. I'm grateful because I get to do what I love for a living. I get to travel the world. And one thing I'm noticing right now about my life is that I wanna scale and get to like this next level, which I know sounds like, what is the next level? But I've been making YouTube videos for 3, 4 years now online. I do something called online marketing where I have like, I have digital courses and like programs I do. I have like 21-day challenges that I do and stuff like that. And these challenges are like, 21-day live events practically, and this is how I bring in abundance. I've been doing this for years, and to be honest with you, I'm getting a little bit tired and a little bit bored with just doing online stuff. I wanna do stuff that's more in person. Now, one thing that I'm going to be doing is live events. Moving into next year, I'm actually teaming up with my buddy Victor. We're gonna be doing live events throughout the year. We're gonna be doing our plant medicine retreats that happen in March and November. And then we have, we're gonna be doing events in Austin. And these events actually are gonna be kind of bringing people through this kind of process too, funny enough. But this, I wanna work more with people in person. I feel like I'm almost getting bored because I've just been doing this for so long, but I also feel like this is something that has been safe for me. It's been safe for me just to make videos online, just to like work behind this camera and stuff like that. And also it's not as dynamic as I'd like it to be. I wanna talk to people. I wanna challenge myself to like talk to different types of people, even on stage. Coaching people like live on stage in front of other people. This is something that actually excites me, but what I'm realizing is I'm feeling frustrated with certain aspects of my life and even certain aspects of my business. Because the thing is, is right now I'm getting ready to scale and be scaling, I'm like developing new systems and you know, I'm lucky because I have a team around me. I have people that I've hired that do different aspects of the business so that I can have more time to do what I enjoy doing, which is like make these videos. So I have customer service people, I have editors, I have social media people on my team, I have a project manager, I have an assistant, we have an event manager, event coordinator, like these are all people in my life that are very necessary. But what I'm realizing is I'm having these things that I'm bumping up against in this creating the system because I'm not leading as much as I should be. I'm kind of like wanting everyone to figure shit out but I'm not leading and painting a clear vision and picture for the future. So it's like people don't have, the people on my team don't necessarily have that of the thing to move towards. It's more so everyone's doing these little tasks right now. But what I'm realizing is it trickles down. So as frustrated as I might get that certain things maybe aren't getting done the exact way I want, or there's like communication errors and stuff like that, I'm realizing that I'm not, I have to take responsibility for it. I think that sometimes also I have this tendency to blame people. I blame people for things that happen and I think it honestly, I looked at my childhood dynamics and because of the whole ex-stepmom situation that was in my life from 7 to 15 years old where my brother and I had pretty much didn't have much of a childhood, we were outside working all day, weren't allowed to have friends, had to earn going to school activities, stuff like that. It was like always like my ex-stepmom was to blame for all of that, for not having a childhood and all this stuff. And also like anytime we got in trouble, you know, my brother and I would get in trouble, we would have to blame each other or something like that to get out of trouble or we'd get like debate taken away or band camp we weren't allowed to go to. So it was interesting how that works and I can see in my own life how I deflect a lot of like my frustration because I blame other people for things. I'm like, well, this is supposed to be done but I wasn't clear about certain things or I'm maybe allowing certain things to like keep falling apart without, going into the tension of like having a vulnerable talk with somebody, you know, I can see how this is like, starts with me, you know, as much as I want to, it's easy for me to blame other people in my life for things. It's like, no, this comes down to me and my own sense of leadership, my own boundaries, my own standard in a way that I either hold other people to or I hold myself to. And as I become aware of this stuff, it's making it easier for me to see what I need to do to change. But first step is become aware of your agreements. Become aware of your agreements that you've made. And as you become aware of them, that's one of the keys because then you see it for what it is. You see it for a story. Let's take me back to like 2017 to give you another example. So that's kind of what I'm doing in my life right now. 2017 was the biggest shift in my life. I became aware of, and I took ownership too, that I was working a 9 to 5 job I hated selling women's shoes and I started making daily videos on YouTube and then my life transformed within 6 months. And it was just a download that I got, an idea that I had, and I committed to those daily videos and my life transformed. But I was having certain agreements. I had to get very honest with myself. I had to realize that my story right now is that I work a 9 to 5 job I don't enjoy, that this is what I'm worthy of. I also had to be aware that like maybe there's an aspect of myself that likes being told what to do. There's an aspect of myself that hated being told what to do, but there was an aspect of myself that liked the weekly checks, I got paid weekly at Barney's New York. I liked the weekly checks. So I was kind of interested, huh, why do I like this so much? You know, not just the weekly checks but the consistency even though I'm being told what to do. There's, I was talking to my dad and his friend Joe last night and they were talking about my lifestyle and how I live and my dad was talking about how, you know, I was going full-time on YouTube and he, even today he's like, I'm so proud of you but I still don't understand it. He still doesn't get YouTube and I didn't have to. He was telling me like last night how proud he was of me, which I think was a real cool thing because I think every kid wants to hear their dad or mom say like, hey, I'm proud of you, you know? And he said that, he's like, I don't get what you do, I don't understand it, but I'm very proud of you. And he was also expressing to me with his friend Joe here, he was like, you know, I like security. So when you were going for it, when I was starting to go full-time on YouTube, it's like, He's like, you can always fall back on your 9 to 5 job. But my dad's a fire investigator. He was a firefighter for years. He's got a pension when he retires. He's still kind of retired, but now he works and does something else. But that's kind of similar to what he did. But he gets a pension like every year the rest of his life. He likes that security. He has agreed to that. And I told him, I said, I would feel completely trapped if I knew that the most I'd be making per year was like a certain pension or a certain amount. I just think a little bit, I just think differently. I like the risk, I like the uncertainty. And I was also like showing my dad like, you value certainty, you value that security, you find security in certainty. So knowing that you make this much per year and that you have all these bonuses and 401k and like all this stuff, you get, you like that. But me, I feel like I'm in a box. And in 2017, I became aware of that box. So my question to you is, are you living in a box that maybe you like, maybe it makes you feel safe, like it did for my dad. There's nothing wrong with the box, but you have to be honest with yourself because I realized that living in my 9 to 5 little box of selling women's shoes was not my passion. And I had to get honest with that aspect of my life and be very honest with where I'm at and that I don't wanna have a 9 to 5 job and what are the payoffs? Anything we do is there's some type of payoff there, even if the payoff is negative, but the payoff is I got security by being told what to do every week and getting my paycheck. You see what I'm saying? And then also another agreement that I used to agree to that kept me in a box was I wasn't aware of this at the time, but my ex-stepmom from 7 to 15 years old was in my life. My dad divorced when I was 15. I started dating women and was like, you know, I had a girlfriend for 4 years who was very controlling. And then after that, I dated other, I realized that I was dating and there was always a woman in my life that reflected my ex-stepmom that was almost the same energy personality. So I had a belief and a story that women are trying to control me. Not only this, but what's the payoff of it? This is the trippy shit. You guys ready? Not only was there a woman in my life trying to control me, but I liked it. There was a part of me that felt safe with someone else giving me my own frame. This is the trippy stuff. When you become aware of this stuff, you start to break out of the box. So I felt safe with someone else trying to control me, even though I had to resist and I had to put up a fight. That was a familiar energy dynamic and pattern that I had growing up because I always had to fight for my own freedom. I always had to prove myself. I always had someone I was walking on eggshells with. Isn't that interesting? But you become aware of that, that's the key. I became aware of that in 2012. And I realized that my manager was just like my ex-stepmom and then I forgave, this is what happened, I forgave my ex-stepmom and I became aware of that belief. That was it. Within 2 weeks, that manager that we tried getting fired for like literally 2 years finally got fired for something stupid because she left my life because she no longer was in vibrant like energy resonance because I worked through that pattern. I let go of the belief that all women are trying to control me and that I'm, attached to it because it feels familiar. And I started to find my own safety within myself. I started to redefine what safety was for me and I started to realize my own boundaries. Like I don't wanna put up with this. And at the very, there was like one time that manager that I'm talking about, she was being herself to certain people that we worked with and she would literally make people cry. She would talk down to people so much that she'd make people cry. This one guy that worked in my department, She was talking down to this guy and he worked at Nordstrom's for a while. He literally looks at her and was like, why are you talking to me like this? You don't talk to people like that. And he quit and walked out. Interesting. If we get to agree to go to work and our boss is a narcissist that is treating us like shit, we are agreeing to it. There is the option of walking out. Some people would say, oh, I don't wanna walk out because I'm getting paid so well. I'm getting paid 10% commission. Mission to sell these shoes and I'm making $300 to $400 a day, but there's other places you could go work where maybe that's not a narcissist boss. You see, isn't that crazy? So that was just an interesting thing. The other belief that I developed after my spiritual awakening is I had this agreement, this belief that people do not understand me. I had this belief that I'm alone, that nobody understands the spiritual journey 'cause I became spiritual and went through my awakening and I immediately started like, telling everyone about awakening. It was like ascension, awakening, we're eternal spiritual beings living temporary human experiences, we're connected to different star systems, like all this like esoteric stuff that people thought were nuts. And I realized how ungrounded I became, but also I realized I developed a belief that like my family, my friends don't get me. There's no one out there that understands me. And as long as that was an active vibration within me, guess what? I was in this box of self-fulfilling prophecy. That's all we get in reality, by the way, is we get a reflection of these self-fulfilling prophecies of what we believe to be true. And the stories we tell ourselves the most often are the realities we're getting. So I told myself a story that people don't understand me, and therefore what I got in reality was many people that didn't get me, that thought I was weird. I felt blocked when I was dating because people just didn't, you know, I was resonating at a frequency of like meditation and mantras and all this sun gazing and stuff. And I look back now and I can clearly see that I had that, I was so attached to that belief. So that's why the first step is awareness. 90% of all transformation is awareness, 90%. And when you become aware of these things, your life begins to transform in a very powerful way. Now that's part of the thing, but the next 5 steps are exact, are also imperative to go through in order to experience that transformation. Now, on one hand, We have that of everything that we're becoming aware of. So what I'd like for you to do right now is to be honest with yourself. What are the agreements that you've made that maybe aren't serving you? What's working in your life, but also what's not working in your life? Just be honest with yourself. If you want evidence of what that is, you might say, oh, it's the subconscious mind, I don't know what it is. You do, just look around. If you work a 9 to 5 job you don't like, then you have agreed that working a 9 to 5 job you don't like is something that you're worth, it's what you deserve or it's what you're worthy of or it's normal. If you are getting paid $1 million a year, then your agreement is that you deserve $1 million a year. If you don't have a job, then maybe there's a worthiness thing where it's like, I believe that I'm not worthy to have a job or I just don't have the motivation to do it or whatever it is. Just be honest with yourself and realize that if you're in a relationship that someone's maybe treating you bad, then maybe it's like, okay, I must believe that I deserve to be treated this way. If you're in a relationship, that's great. Then it's like, okay, I have a belief that I should be in a happy relationship. You see what I mean? Just look to your external reality because it is very easily reflecting to you what the subconscious is and what your subconscious belief is and what you're allowing. And that's what you wanna first off do. Now, second step, all right, make the choice to let go of the old agreement. So the first step is become aware of the agreement. The first step is to be aware, aware, it's awareness. The second step is to let go of the agreement and to make the choice. Now, letting go is only hard because we believe letting go is hard. Letting go is easy, letting go is a choice. It's just that the payoff that we get from not making the choice is so great that we don't wanna let go. For example, a lot of times people say, oh, I can't let go of a person. I can't let go of like, yeah, like maybe a past relationship or something. And they say it's so hard. Well, there's a part of them, it's the choice to let go, but the reason it's hard is because the meaning, meaning is what is hard to let go of. And we're afraid that if we let go of an old meaning, then we're meaningless and we have nothing. And really, the key, especially with going through a breakup, is you're letting go of an old meaning knowing that you're gonna recreate it in your own life. Not necessarily just another person, but within yourself. That's why a lot of times I think like when people are going through a breakup or something, it's like find meaning in other things, find meaning in your passion, find meaning in a new hobby, find meaning in hanging out with your friends. It's a loss of meaning really is what that is. And that when you become aware, it's like, okay, you all, sometimes people are also afraid like this was the one chance I had at love and I let it go, therefore, I'm never gonna find it now. And if I let go of it, if I let go of this attachment, then it's gone forever, you know? So it's being aware of this meaning and making the choice to let it go by being aware of the payoff. What is the payoff? What is the payoff you get from working that job you don't like? What is that payoff you get maybe from being in an abusive relationship? Isn't that crazy that there's a payoff from being in an abusive relationship? The payoff will be a negative thing, obviously, if it's a, if it's like an abusive relationship, but the thing people become addicted to is they're addicted to familiar childhood patterns. Maybe that feels normal for what you experienced growing up. So even though it's very negative and not a good feeling, it's like, this feels familiar, you see? So it's like, become aware of the payoff. Even though it's comfortable and familiar, I was attracted to women that wanted to control me. I shed that pattern when I became aware of it and I let it go back in 2012, but it was a pattern that I was in a way addicted to because it felt so familiar to me. And as I've become aware of these things and made the choice to let it go, it's like I didn't become so free. You let go of so much energy that's there. And another thing that the reason it's hard to let go of old agreements sometimes is not only is it the payoff, but it's also one of the payoffs and the strongest payoffs is the necessity to be right. We wanna be right. We wanna be right at the expense of happiness. So it's like all men are like pigs, abusive and narcissistic. If we believe that, it might be really hard to let go of a past relationship because there's so much emotional energy that you get from being right about the past. It justifies past relationship. It justifies parental dynamics. It justifies things. So to let it go is to let go of being right being right and that we get a payoff for being right because we feel alive, we feel angry, or we feel that energy. And I told this story before, but I've had experiences before where I may have been right about things, fighting for being right, but it ends up letting go of my own happiness. And the example I always use is coming back from Hawaii on a plane with an ex-girlfriend of mine. We were going from Hawaii to LA, and on that flight that we were getting ready to book, at this place called Maui Kombucha in Maui. We were booking our flights and what happened was we booked at the same exact time. As she pushed the button first, my flight price then went up like $200 or something like that and then I was like, wait, I shouldn't have to pay more money just because she pushed the button first. So I called Expedia, I'm all angry about it and then an hour later after they told me there's nothing they could do about it, I had to pay more, I realized that I just wanted to be right. I shouldn't have had to pay more because of this and that and once I let that go, I felt so free, I felt so light. But I could feel I was fighting to be right, you know? So make the choice to let go of the old agreement by becoming aware of the payoff and letting it go and realize that there's so much more lightness you're gonna feel by letting it go. So that's the second step. So we got the first step is awareness, being brutally honest with your agreements. Second step is making the choice and letting go of the old payoffs and the necessity to be right. Now the third step is to heal and to feel what comes up. Feel it to heal it. Now the body must release what comes up because a lot of times we have stored emotion inside of us that we haven't let go in the past. Now before we go there, actually, I'm sorry, I wanna go back just for a second to 2 'cause I wanna share in my own life, what am I letting go of the payoff of? So for me, the payoff I get of being online, of doing the freedom to just make videos like this where I don't have to like challenge myself to be to be in front of a lot of people. You know, this is my comfort zone. This is easy for me to make videos like this. I though don't feel, this is something that I was talking to my shadow work coach about, Doug. We were talking about how videos that do well are the videos that I'm feeling the most dopamine. So when I'm making a video I'm very passionate about, I'm releasing a lot of dopamine 'cause I'm doing what I love. Dopamine's not always bad. But then what happens is people feel what you feel. So you on the other end will feel the dopamine that I'm feeling and it's like contagious and then you're able to connect certain ideas together but what I'm realizing is I don't feel as much dopamine as I used to because I'm doing the same thing over and over again in the same type of way. So when I start doing things and I get out of my comfort zone, I start coaching people, I start doing live events, I'm gonna feel more alive and in that passion frequency, other people will feel that off of me but I have to let go of the familiar pattern. Of me being in this comfort zone. Even like the payoff with not leaving my team as much, the payoff is I don't have to go into those tension conversations. The other payoff is I don't have to find more people to hire that are gonna help me build this vision. It's a lot of energy to find good people to like, you know, at least that's my belief. You guys see what I'm saying? Like even as I'm talking right now, you can see the beliefs that I have, I just said it. I believe that, you know, it's hard to find good people that want to work for some vision No, is it hard? That's a belief, it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. So as we become aware of this, I can then see what is the payoff that I get from that? Well, the payoff is it either stops me from taking action, it keeps me safe in the system that I already have. So the key to this is that awareness, making the choice to let go of the payoff, and that's what I'm doing in my own life right now. So that's the second step. Now the third step, as I said, is heal and feel what comes up. Now, this has been key and this is like the thing that always triggers me about my shadow work integration coach whose name is Doug. He's always asking me to like feel inside my body. How does that feel inside of your body? And he'll like, I'll be thinking, he's like, okay, when you think of this person, what comes up? When you think of this person, what comes up? When you think of this event, what comes up? When you think like, and not just that, not what comes up, but what do you feel in your body? And I'm like, I gotta like really tune into my body 'cause it's not a mental thing, but our body doesn't lie. I have a friend right now who is kind of in a trauma bonding type relationship that she's moving out of. And an interesting thing that she says is like in this trauma bonded relationship, she feels so uncomfortable in this relationship. Her body is literally telling her this relationship relationship is not for you. This relationship is something you're not feeling safe in. And she feels very ungrounded, she feels very unsafe. And what she's becoming aware of is that this dynamic that she has, that she's feeling unsafe and not comfortable, she's becoming aware of how she feels in her body, which is a huge step. And she's feeling what she feels. And she's also realizing that she has kind of an abandonment wound. She realizes that she, you know, the same thing that a lot of us go through is we have maybe an emotionally abandoned parent growing up. And she's realizing that she felt emotionally abandoned from her dad growing up. And it was like very challenging for her. And she has this belief that she's too much. She believes that she's just too much. She's maybe, maybe her dad told her when she was young, like, you're too much. It's just, I can't deal with this right now. You're too much. And then she's always felt that. So she has these emotions and she has these things that comes up in her relationship. And what happens is the men she attracts in her life, don't wanna deal with her because they think she's too much. And in actuality, she's not too much. It's just that she's attracting people into her life where she is too much because of that self-fulfilling prophecy. But what she's also doing is that belief is there and it's like they can't handle the energy because maybe that's what she's attracting them to begin with. But she also is bottling up this shame and this like energy inside of herself because she can't express it because if she does, someone's gonna leave her. Someone's gonna abandon her. They're not gonna be there for her. You see how these agreements work? So the thing that I've been talking to her about is like, feel what comes up, feel inside of your body. Well, her talking to me, she was talking to me and another friend of mine and we're two masculine people that were like holding energy for her and we're like showing her like there's masculine, like there's masculine energy that can hold this for you. You're not too much. There's nothing wrong with you. It's not your fault. Your dad's emotional unavailability growing up is not your fault. The people in your life that even maybe can't hold that energy for you, it's not your fault and you're not too much. Shame will keep us living in a bubble and keep us feeling like we're too much when you're not too much. Your emotions aren't too much. Vulnerability is the key. And that was a huge breakthrough for her too because she's had vulnerable conversations with people in her life recently that's completely transformed her life because vulnerability is the cure to shame. We feel like we're broken, we're afraid to show aspects of ourselves, we keep ourselves in this little bubble. I know that kind of feels like a tangent to this whole thing, but you must feel it to heal it and feel inside of your body. And as you feel inside of your body, you begin to heal, you complete old processes. I had to feel like even when I was going through my past breakup, one of the most challenging things I ever have been through was going through my past breakup because it showed me so much of my own codependent patterns and how much I identified with someone else One thing I had to do is I had to feel that inside of myself and what I realized is a lot of the abandonment that I felt was, it was because I felt abandoned when I was a kid. It was just, we're replaying childhood dynamics over and over again and that's our trauma, that's us being able to heal our trauma bond and our trauma just in life in general and the thing that I've had to do is go into that energy and feel it and let it be there and accept it. And in the feeling, it all comes up. One of the most powerful things we do at our retreats and at our live events and what we're gonna be doing at the live events that we do in Austin and even at the plant medicine ones we do is we do breathwork. 'Cause when you're breathing in a certain pattern, you are in a way activating certain trauma responses in your body to then release stored energy. And when I've been in breathwork, I've had some extraordinarily powerful experiences. Feel it to heal it. One time I did breathwork and I did it with Victor and Patty, who leads our breathwork when we do our retreats and stuff. And she was singing a song and in the song it was like, she was singing this like kind of an angry song where that was the intention of the song, just like bringing up anger inside the body. And I'm breathing so deep and like into this kind of pattern and this energy's flowing through my body and I was literally dialoguing with my ex-stepmom and through Patty singing and I could feel she was banging on this drum really loud and I could feel chills through my body even as I was going through, even now and I could just, I could feel myself dialoguing to her back and forth and I started screaming because there were so many times I was growing up where I didn't express how I really felt. I didn't tell someone no. I didn't— I wasn't allowed to have boundaries. And I could just feel that there was so much pent-up anger inside my throat chakra, inside my body that I'd never expressed before. And as I expressed it, guess what? I was healing it. You feel it to heal it. And healing that and allowing myself to express that and being vulnerable— a huge part of my life transformation over this last year is being vulnerable, having hard conversations with with people. Even my dad who's here right now, we've had some very interesting conversations over the last couple of days about childhood and stuff like that, vulnerable, challenging conversations to have, but guess what? Through it comes healing. So that's to completely transform your life in 2022, it's time to go in and feel it to heal it, feel it to heal it. Do breathwork, go in and I'm gonna be doing this by doing my own breathwork. I'm gonna be doing this by feel what comes up even at, 'cause it might, lesson for going into 2022 for me is stepping into my own power. And I think it's probably that for you if you're listening to this episode. Empowerment is the year of 2022 and getting into the tension, stepping into the unknown. And that's what I'm being aware of in my own life is this process for me is like going into tension, having hard conversations. I've had very vulnerable conversations that were kind of hard to have. I've had to draw boundaries with people that priorly kind of thought they could walk on me. And by having these harder conversations, I become more empowered and realize that I'm worthy and I'm able to have this kind of like dynamic and this kind of like request, you know, for people to respect my own energy. So feeling the tension, acceptance of it, this is all key for it. Now, the fourth step to this process is to identify what you want and to identify what it is to be the most authentic version of you is. So it's kind of like as well, when you look at these three steps, we have the first one 2 or 3 are letting go, becoming aware and letting go. And then the last 3 have to go with wiring in. And in order to wire something in, you first off, you have to become aware of what that is. So what I did in 2017 is I became aware of the version of me that was a full-time YouTuber. Now, what is the identity of that ideal version of you? How do you think? How do you feel? How do you act? What are your belief systems? What do you believe about yourself? And for me, that was working that 9 to 5 job selling women's shoes. I could imagine the version of me that was making daily videos, that woke up every day excited to make a video, that was studying different topic ideas that I could make each day. I would write them down on a piece of paper and I actually had a whiteboard with all this long list of things of like different, you know, things I would wanna make videos on, different topics. And I would make a video every single day no matter what. And I noticed that that's the rule that that version of me had. Even when I was going to work and I was working 40 hours a week, I would realize I have to make a video every day and that was my mentality and I realized that that version of me acted, thought and felt different. So I became aware of that and then I, and that was the step, just become aware of what that is and you don't have to know exactly what it is, it can change as you go but become aware of what that is and what that looks like for you. So I'm gonna ask you now, What does that version of you think, feel, and act like? How does that version of you body language? What is that like? What are the belief systems? What are the stories about that version of you's life that they have? And even now, so now I look at my own life, the next level of me, I'm more in a leadership position. I'm leading in a way, I'm leading like a new shift in consciousness on the planet with this movement. And I'm doing that with other people, not just by myself, but I'm able to lead it and to cast a vision. And with my team, I'm able to let that energy trickle down and I carry myself with a better posture. I've noticed that if I imagine that version of me, I have better posture. Sometimes I hunch over and I close my heart. I have better posture. I can tell that when I carry, the way I carry myself, the way I speak is just kind of assertive but also compassionate. I can tell that that version of me has different values. I value authenticity, I value vulnerability, I value integrity, I value going into tension conversations if I have to, having those hard conversations now because I realize how important it is to like have a certain flow, how you do one thing's how you do everything. So the other thing I want you to become aware of is what are the values of the version of you that is that version of you? The version of me that was a 9-to-5 job goer valued being told what to do, valued security of a consistent paycheck. The value of the version of me that was a full-time YouTuber valued the unknown of like putting out content and valued like my own sense of entitlement to like make videos and I was like self-motivated. Like it was just a different value system. So become aware of those values, become aware of your body language, become aware of how you carry yourself. Become aware of your authenticity. Are you having fun? This next 2022 for me, I'm gonna be having more fun. I'm gonna start asking questions more so of what excites me the most instead of what makes the most money, what excites me the most because the money comes the more excited I am anyways. I'm realizing that even at the end of, you know, I'm doing a 21-day abundance challenge in the first 21 days of 2021 when I first made this course, like I'll just be completely honest with you guys. When I first made this, I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna give it my all and I'm excited to do it now, but I've had to change the way I look at this because I could tell, I originally did a 21-day Magnetic Love Challenge and this 21-day Magnetic Love Challenge had 4,000 customers that came through. We had over 800 people a day live for 21 days in a row. It was magical, I was so passionate about it, I was so excited to do it, it was so connected to my heart and then it did so well And then in 2021 or 2022, I guess 2022 is what I meant if I said 2021, but for the first 21 days of 2022, we're doing this abundance challenge and I realized that one of the reasons I was kind of doing it was because I just knew that it would, it was like gonna do well, it was gonna be successful, it was bringing a lot of money and I'm gonna help people rewire the money beliefs but I'm not as passionate talking about like the abundance and money thing as I am love. Love and the dynamics there. And maybe I started, maybe I do get extremely passionate about it, but it's just interesting because when it comes to abundance and money too, you wanna follow the passion. And I could tell that when I decided to do it, I wasn't being in complete integrity with myself because I wasn't as passionate about it as even doing another Magnetic Love Challenge. So I've had to be very honest with myself. You know, it takes brutally, you know, these subconscious things rather than just doing something 'cause it makes money or it's gonna do well and I haven't done it yet. I've known for also for 3 months of this year, I didn't do anything. I wasn't selling anything. I was just sitting, I was just like going inwards. So I knew that at the end of 2021, I had to launch a couple of things and do like a couple of live events and stuff like virtual Zoom events that we're doing, you know, for 2021. So I was kind of banking on this time of the year, I guess, like start the end of the year out strong financially with that. 'Cause I have a big, I have a team, I have people on salary and stuff like that. Like it's not a lot of, what I make goes towards creating a vision and a system and stuff like that. So anyways, but step 4 is identify what you want and what is the most authentic version of you. And I can tell that this new version of me has more fun, is very in integrity and following based and connected to my heart, is very humble and is very much stepping into the unknown. It's like excited to get in the unknown, values uncertainty more than just certainty. And that's what I'm realizing. Now the next step, the 5th step, is what you wanna do is you wanna make the choice to be it consistently. Make the choice to be it consistently. Now, the biggest change I ever did is I learned to make videos every single day on YouTube. That changed my life more than anything. There's a certain level of taking, this is like the truth about this stuff and about, I don't care what people tell you when it comes on like thinking better thoughts and all this other stuff, it can work for some people, but one of the best things and the best ways to transform your life in physical reality reality is to take massive action. The thing is, is we associate taking massive action with pain. It's not pleasurable, it's not enjoyable, but what you wanna do is become aware that taking massive action when you're doing what you love is easy. I made videos every single day on YouTube for literally 2 years, like 700 videos. I never missed a day. It was crazy, but I was also very passionate about it. And then it kind of changed. Now I make videos like 3, 4 times a week, but The difference is what you wanna do and what you wanna become aware of with yourself is what can you do every single day that compounds over time, that wires in a new you, that wires in that identity? And for me, the videos changed my identity. The next thing is doing live events. The version of Aaron that is the most leadership version of me is instead of like always having to sell via like online courses and shit like that, it's like I'm just gonna do 6, 6 events a year or something and lead and be and feel excited about it and like take, move into the unknown and do things I've never done before and travel. Like this is the new version of me and I'm gonna be doing that. Like of course every single day, maybe I can't do that every day because I'm not gonna do a live event every day, but like there's a version of that that I'm gonna be growing. I'm gonna be putting intention in my team, putting intention into like growing this vision with Victor and like we're doing these things together. So it's really cool. So this is something that you become aware of and you start to value also getting into the unknown. One thing we're gonna be doing at these live events that we do is a stretch. It's called a stretch experience. You go out into the world, you do something your old identity would have never done, and as you do it, you push through the fear. You literally redefine your sense of identity. It shifts your sense of self. So this is something that I've done that before, by the way. I've gone into public and done some crazy weird things. I've had to convince 2 people that I, I had to convince 2 people in like in this grocery store in Sedona called Natural Grocers. I think I had to find 2 people and convince them that can they help me find my purple ferret because I lost my purple ferret and I sold it and I had them help me for 5 minutes look through under the aisles for my purple ferret. And it was just a dumb thing, but it was just fun to do and it was like, you get out of your comfort zone. I had to pose for an artichoke in the middle of Whole Foods and give it a whole speech and ask for people to applaud. There's a lot of other things that we did, but little embarrassing things like that. You feel so alive when you do these things, it's so crazy, but at these events that we do, we're gonna have little challenges where we go out into the world and we do stuff like that. It's gonna be fun, but anyways, Be it consistently, what you do every single day compounds over time. As I changed my identity, and here's the thing, as you do something consistently, it begins to change your sense of identity. You go to the gym every day for 2 weeks, you become a gym goer. You go to the gym every day for a week of Bikram, you become like a Bikram yoga person. You know, as I made daily videos, it became easy to make daily videos because it was part of my daily routine. I got up every day and it was the first thing I did. So for you, what is the one thing you could do every single day and then take the identity with you? If you paint every day, it's not like once you paint 1,000 paintings, then you're a painter, an artist. You're an artist the moment you start and you paint because it's who you are, not because of what it will get you. And as you do this, as you take massive action with this and you commit to a new version of yourself, the new version of yourself that is taking massive action, it changes everything. Now with that being said, the most, one of the most powerful things you wanna do is actually, there's something I'm reading right now that's called I think it's called "The Gap and the Gain." It's a book. You wanna measure, the 6th step is you wanna measure the gain and feel it meow. I wrote meow. You wanna measure the gain instead of the gap. The gap is, the gap is when you notice the gap, it's like when you're climbing up the mountain and you're looking up the mountain and you're like, man, I still have so much further to go. And then you feel disempowered. The pursuit of happiness, you're pursuing happiness. Which is like, there's no happiness here, I'm pursuing it. I want to be abundant, I want it, it's not here now, I lack it. Now we must measure the gain, which means measure how far you've come. So you're not measuring looking at the top of the mountain, you're measuring and you're looking back like, whoa, I've come so far, I'm so grateful for where I am. For me, I'm like measuring, I'm not like, oh, I wanna be doing live events and I want this like epic team where we're all just in unison and like all these things. Things happening, measure how far you've come. And I'm like being grateful for where I'm at. I'm grateful that there's this huge, amazing YouTube family, that we're all connected and that we're, we're all able to like shift the collective consciousness of the planet together. I'm grateful that I'm able to live in abundance, live in the house that I love and have friends and family and amazing girlfriend, like all these things. I'm grateful for all this stuff. And as I become aware and grateful for the emotions, it's like you experience more opportunity in your life. Think about that too. The things that you wanna bring into your life, you want them because of the emotion it gives you and then you can give yourself permission to feel that emotion right now. If you want more money in your life, what does money mean to you? Probably means security or freedom. If you could look at things in your life that already give you freedom, the ability to eat what you want, the ability to go for a walk with your dog, whatever, you then start to realize the abundance is already here. And you want to measure that. And as you're feeling grateful in the moment right now, and as you're also having fun, have fun along the process, you will notice that things happen easier than ever. Now for 2022, the other thing that I think will completely transform your life that will build on everything you just learned is learning what is called the law of vibration. The law of vibration is more powerful than the law of attraction. It will help you shift into the new identity easier than ever. So if you haven't checked this video out yet, click it. Here, it's one of the most powerful videos I've ever made. If you're finding that maybe there's blocks coming up when it comes to attracting the reality you want, maybe you watched the movie "The Secret," maybe you've been having a visualization of what you want, but you find that it's not coming into being,