We Had It All—and Still Felt Empty | The Date Your Wife Experience - LIVE

Well, welcome here to our inaugural experience here at the Date Your Wife Experience.

All right.

I'm here with my wife. How long has this been in the making?

This experience or dating your wife?

Well, dating your wife. I've been doing for a while. How about this experience?

I feel like we've been talking about it for a couple of years, but I feel like it's finally like we're here already. Well, we started something a while ago. Like it was kind of a couple's experience. And then I decided to have another baby.

Yeah, it was about 5 and a half years ago.

Yeah, we did a couple's thing. It was like a weekly call, but a lot has happened.

A lot has happened. Well, welcome. We've got, we've got many of you here that are active participants in Warrior People from the Past. Our excitement tonight is the fact that we are— this is not a plus one experience. So we're not just saying, hey, bring your wife. Or vice versa, bring your husband. This is a really a move for us to be able to unify couples. We have seen here at Wake Up Warrior for the past 15 years— I've led over 91,000 men here myself personally through large group experiences, small group experiences, one-on-one. I've worked with many of you that are here with us tonight in some form or capacity or another. And one of the, the common things that we have seen along this is the inability for men to translate some of the things that they're experiencing here in their truth, in learning the Warrior's Way, and be able to translate it at home. I often told my guys over the years that, listen, the best indicator of the success of what we do here, it doesn't come down to what you say, it comes down to what your wife tells me. And that would be no less true for me and Danielle. So I brought Danielle into the picture with us for the first time on stage at Warrior events in 2017. And over the years she's been involved. We launched the Date Your Wife podcast in 2018. We have run that show on and off again. I don't know, we probably have around 400 or 500 episodes now.

Yeah.

So we kind of paused a little bit with some kids. We decided to have 2 more children and we're here for tonight. So I want you to understand coming into tonight, this is not a coaching experience. We're not here to coach you. Our podcast has never been an intention to try to pretend that we have all the answers. Well, our intention was with the podcast was really simple. Danielle and I were driving down the road one day years ago, and we were having such an intense, open, authentic conversation with each other. I thought, you know, what if we just shared how we talk with each other and how we work through things? We just started sharing it publicly. How many of you have listened to or heard at least one of the episodes of the Date Your Wife podcast? Hand to the camera if you've done this. Okay, cool. So some of you haven't. I'd encourage you to. You know, we kind of use our podcast as therapy. Which is we put our, we put our, our stuff out there and let people see it. We've heard from hundreds of couples that it sparks opportunity for them to have a conversation. So this is going to be different than the podcast, is the experience. Um, we're going to do this in kind of a two-part series here this week and next week at the same time. But I want you to understand it's not a coaching experience tonight. This is not a therapy experience tonight. We're not here to fix a broken marriage. That's not the intention. I want you to consider that there's an awakening that can happen for you tonight. Awakening that we've seen happen in our marriage year over year for the past 23 years that we've been married. We have hit some of the hardest pieces of considerations of divorce many times in those 23 years with the pressure of 5 kids, a grandchild, 2 rising companies over the past 25 years as entrepreneurs. So there's been a lot of challenges, uh, along the way. But tonight then really is an opportunity to ask better questions. And I want you to consider as we get started tonight that the biggest challenge that I've seen for men and women and married couples inside of the networks of Wake Up Warrior have been getting women and men on the same page to play the same game. So there's the game that Danielle plays, there's the game that I play, there's the world that she sees, the world that I see, and then there's the world that we see together. So as we get into this tonight, it's gonna be different. I'm not gonna teach you a ton tonight, but you are gonna have an experience tonight. And we're going to start those off with a little bit different frame, which is over the last couple years, Christ became a very central part of my life, and God became an incredible part of both of our lives. And really, we can attribute the success in our marriage in the last 2 to 3 years has become an inner transformation that could not have happened without God. And so tonight you come for different reasons, you come to participate and experience for different purposes. Some of you are in marriages that are absolutely skyrocketing in a beautiful way, some of your relationships that are struggling and trying to find your way. And we're going to look at a couple different frames with that tonight. But I want to ask you a question as we get started. I'm going to do this like we do in a lot of our trainings here at Warrior, which is we're going to start with a prayer and then we're going to have a moment of silence. And during that silence, we're just going to ground ourselves. I'm going to do a little bit of breathwork with you before the prayer just to kind of bring you here into the experience over the next 75 to 90 minutes together that tonight you can leave with something special. You can leave with something real. And then from that silence, we're going to get a chance to go into breakouts after you have a chance to think and write, and we're going to talk. So you'll be with your spouse. If you're here by yourself, that's fine. If you're here by yourself without your husband or here without your, without your wife, that's fantastic. We had a ton of couples or individuals reach out and said, my spouse can't make it tonight, or can I come check this out and, and possibly bring them next week? I said, absolutely. So as we get started, understand that God is the only way that this game can transform for you. There's not 3 simple steps to success. There's not 19 processes you can follow. And social media offers you a mountain of how to fix your marriage solutions. And I want you to consider that there's one place that it can be repaired and it can be accelerated, and that comes through the power of God and through the blood of Christ and through the ultimate transformation of you as a man, you as a woman, and you as a couple. So go ahead and close your eyes with me, all of you. And if you're sitting with your spouse right next to them, do me a favor and just reach over and hold their hand. Shoulder hand is just sit beside each other. If you're by yourself, that's fine. Just close your eyes for a minute. I'm going to take 3 deep breaths, and as we take these deep breaths, we're going to take them in through our nose and we're going to release our mouth. And let's take our first deep breath in. And release. There's a lot that's gone on today. Been juggling kids, you've been juggling work, you've been juggling conversations with each other. All that's going to be here in about 75 minutes. You can pick it all back up. And here we go, second deep breath in. And release. Just let yourself settle in. Life is ever stressful, being married, having kids, running companies, managing money, it's a lot. Just let yourself be here. On this third breath in, we're gonna hold our breath at the top, and when we do, I want you to bring your attention to your heart. And I want you to recognize that the breath of God beats inside your chest. That no matter what you're going through as a couple or what you're going through individually, that you're not broken, you're not dead, you're very much alive. And your marriage might be buried in some ways, and tonight we're gonna start undigging a bit of that burial. And here we go, deep breath in. And hold. And release. Just sit with me, eyes closed. Father, we're beginning something new tonight, something that has been years and years and years in the making. And Father, probably we see inside society today as divorce begins to run rampant and marriages begin to fall apart and even the a semblance of the unified one flesh concept that you spoke about in Genesis begins to become a non-possibility for most people. Father, tonight we ask for your spirit to be here with us, that you would enter every one of these homes, that you would enter the minds and the hearts of each couple that's here, each individual that's here with us, and that tonight as we share, as we work on our own, as we work with our spouse, as we work in breakouts, That, Father, answers to the questions that are on the hearts and minds of these couples and these individuals, that it would be answered. And even the questions that they don't know they should ask, the questions that need to be asked, that those questions would be found and courage tonight. And that tonight would become simply a springboard to something bigger and to something better, to something deeper and something where your presence becomes a working force inside of all of our marriages and that we can become beacons not only for our children, but for our families and for those other couples around us that are struggling every single day just to survive and continue to move forward. And Father, as we ask a simple question, why did we choose to come tonight? And as they sit in this moment of silence, Father, I ask you to give each one of them their answer. None of them had to be here tonight, but choosing to be. And so work with them and through the spirit, work with them over the next 90 seconds As we end this prayer and we begin this moment of silence to guide them to the truth, what is the reason that they came? What is the pulling force that brings them into this conversation tonight with us? And Father, we seal this prayer with this simple question and enter this moment of silence to begin this experience tonight in the sacred and holy name of Jesus the Christ.

Amen.

Mm.

And eyes closed and deep breath in. And release. With your eyes still closed, I want you to sit here for 90 seconds. There's nowhere to go. But there is one question that I want you to sit with. Why did you personally decide to come tonight? Why did you choose to put your energy, your presence, and yourself here? And just sit with that question as we all sit in silence for 90 seconds and allow God to speak truth to you. And we begin this silent experience in 3, 2, 1, and off we go. And deep breath in and release. With your eyes still closed, here in a moment I'm going to turn on some music. We're going to open our eyes, and I want you to take out a cell phone. A journal, and you're just gonna write each individual, regardless if you're here with your spouse, what is the reason you personally chose to be here tonight? And 3, 2, 1, go ahead and open your eyes. And we're gonna answer a simple question. What brings you here tonight? And we're gonna listen to music for 2 minutes while you answer that question, and then we're gonna get a chance to introduce ourselves and talk through that answer. Okay, we're going in 3, 2, 1, off we go. Okay, so we're gonna add a second question, so I'm going to give you one more minute. I want you to think about your marriage and what is the greatest hope you have or desire you have for your marriage over the next year. Like, we move forward to a year from now into the summer of 2027, like, what might be true or what might be possible, what might be present for you and for your partner 12 months from now? Just what is the aspiration? Look at maybe 1 or 2 things that you're hoping to show up. If you're clear about the question, give me a thumbs up to the camera. OK, perfect.

Let's go.

We've got 1 minute. We're going in 3. We're going in 2. We're going in 1. Time to write. OK, so we're going to go into some breakouts. So one of the processes we use here at Warrior that is very effective is we talk about an idea, you get a chance to write write or work by yourself, and then you get a chance to talk. So there's going to be a couple times tonight where we're going to have you talk with your spouse, and we won't go to breakout, um, so those conversations can be a little more intimate, personal with you two. And those are going to be some times we're going to get into breakouts with several other couples. Again, we may have some individuals who are here not with their partner tonight. That's okay, it's fantastic. You're invited every week, um, and then we'll go into breakout. So we're going to do that here right now. When we go into this breakout, I want you to introduce yourself. You can introduce yourself as a couple. Here's who we are, here's Here's how long we've been married. And then you can share what you're seeing as far as your intention for being part of this tonight and what you're hoping to discover and anything else you'd like to share with yourself. So this breakout will be about 10 minutes as we got some couples. We don't have— everyone's not in a couple tonight, but we got enough that it'll give us enough time for everybody to share. So there's not a representative, although I'm doing a lot of talking. You're going to hear from Danielle quite a bit tonight too. I'm not both— one person is not representing the couple. Have both people share, both the man and woman, as we go into this breakout. Okay, so this breakout's going for about 10 minutes, a chance to introduce yourself, uh, where you're from, how long you've been married, and why you chose—

look at me—

for tonight. If you're clear about this, give me a thumbs up at the camera so I know you're clear. Okay, here we go. We are rolling. We're sharing and going to breakouts in 3, in 2, 1.

You guys hear us?

We got, we got the Tinas in the house. We've got Wes Mowbray representing himself with his beard. He looks fantastic tonight. And who else we got? McKenzie. And who, who else? Who is this with you, McKenzie?

Jake.

Jake, what's up? Okay, well, why don't you have you guys start? Jake, why don't you start yourself?

Yeah, sure. Um, let's see, we're here because we've been associated with you guys and Warrior since like what, 2017, and off and on capacities. Um, and, uh, we listen to your podcast and I guess For why did I show up? Because we're searching for something to help us hit the next level. You know, we work together a lot, but it's been a long time since we've done any sort of experience or coaching together. And I think it's time for us to come back together and do that to hit the next level in our life.

I love it.

How long you guys been married?

13, 13 years. Yeah, 13 this month, July, in July.

Yep.

I love it. I love that you were, you were questioning that. You look right to your wife for the answer. Good work.

Yeah, I was gonna say 13. 13. We're not at 13 yet. We got like 20, 21 days or something.

Perfect. How old are you, brother?

Uh, 37.

37. Okay, you guys got married young and got kids?

Yeah, 20, 24, and 25 for their age, and then yeah, 5-year-old and a 1.5-year-old.

Okay, you are in the thick of it. Let's go.

We are.

Yes, yes.

Okay.

Don't worry, Dave and Angie have decided they're going to have 2 more toddlers. They've decided to throw that in the mix. And they're going to have 5 horses. They've got 5 horses. Mackenzie, go ahead and share with us.

Um, yeah, I think kind of like Jake said, looking for just— we've been on fire in all aspects of life for a stint of time, and it felt amazing. But it's been a tough couple of months with work. It's just we've kind of fallen off being on fire in like all 4 areas of life. So looking to have something to challenge us as a couple and I guess more of that growth aspect together. We have been big believers in counseling. We've done that most of our marriage, but I feel like we just talk about issues and problems in counseling. We don't really talk about future growth. So That is what— that is what I'm looking for mainly.

I love it.

I love it. I'm gonna ask you a question. What's the number one reason you chose this man to hook up to and be with?

When I met Jake, I honestly was like, he's too good to be true. There's no way.

He—

he's just always wanting to serve the people around him, his team, his family. And I mean, even from when he came up, came home from Warrior Week, I remember thinking, because he went, because I was kind of like, hey, it's an ultimatum, like, go, or this is, it's not looking good. When he came home, I noticed change, but he hates the saying time will tell, but I was kind of like, yeah, time will tell. And the no expectations thing has been I feel like he leads life with no expectations from others, and it's just the core of who he is, and it's admirable.

Beautiful. Jake, why did you choose her?

Um, I see, like, the— I see what everyone else doesn't in her. Um, some people start to know her, but they don't— they don't always see the loyalty, the intense authenticity and how hard she loves. And I feel like people have been missing that her whole life, and I saw it instantly.

Yep.

Danielle, you relate to that?

Yeah, I always say like Garrett knows like the real version of me, you know, especially if like he's a little more extroverted and I'm like the more introverted one. It's like, same, same. They'll like judge the character based off of one person, you know. So yes.

Yeah.

Yeah, we have been down the road where people have known us for 10, 15 years, but they haven't spent a lot of time with Danielle. And then we'll go out and they're like, oh my God, your wife talks and she's so funny. I'm like, I never knew. I was like, she's just so cute and she— I didn't know she talked. I was like, yeah, she knows how to communicate. It's really good.

And she does.

Yes, she's very funny.

Similar feedback. Yes, 100%.

Okay, perfect. Well, let's come to our iconic couple. Of the moment, our favorite equestrian guides and real estate luxury experts. All right, Dave, why don't you take it away and go ahead and introduce yourself.

Um, Dave, Tina, it's my wife Angie. We've been married almost 16 years in November. Um, yeah, we have 3 daughters, 14, 13, and 5. So we're on a very similar path as you guys, although we didn't re-up twice.

Don't do it.

Not happening.

No way.

We've worked together in the real estate world. That's how we met in 2009. We joke that we spend so much time together that we can't believe that we still like each other, but we do.

Most of the time.

Most of the time.

Yeah.

All right, man.

Go there.

It's going to be like that. And, uh, yeah, that's, uh, now we're embarking on this, this next part of the journey, which has been an identity shift and a whole new part of our relationship. And, you know, redefining our roles in this with the horses. And, you know, if you would have told me 3 years ago this would be my life today, I would have laughed in your face. But here we are.

Beautiful, beautiful. Coming tonight, Dave, what's, what's the intention? I mean, you and I work one-on-one. Are we going to work with both you and Angie together? You guys already do a lot. What are your thoughts for tonight?

You know, I'm always, you know me, I'm always open to learning. Obviously modeling, you know, I remember you gave me the advice to do a podcast and it'd be the best thing for your marriage that you ever, and we did 36 episodes and then stopped, not realizing that we missed that like time together, which was just a moment to be honest with ourselves as we're speaking to the whole world. Like, so it was like a better form of therapy. And in what we're doing, we're not only are we working together, but we're going to also, um, bring couples into the arena with the horse. So, uh, you know, I'm always learning from you guys, the two of you and your relationship. So we're here to learn.

Perfect.

Angie, how about you?

Um, same.

I honestly didn't think I was going to get on camera, so you look beautiful still.

Just got out of the shower and I got to leave in 3 minutes to get our daughter, but, um, But no, he mentioned that you guys were doing this. I saw it on our Signal and I was like, we gotta at least jump in and see what this is all about. You guys have been an example for us for fucking what, a decade? Yeah. Um, and so, you know, I really honor you and Dave's relationship through all these years. We learned so much from you. And so we're like, what can we learn? And, you know, we're still trying to figure out our roles and this new dynamic and this new world that we're creating. And so It's a lot of like giving. Even right now, like before this, we were working on all the stuff that we're putting together, and you know, we're still dealing with the balance of it all. And so there's always something to learn, especially in marriage, I feel like. And it's just, um, there's— you're never fully— or you've never fully arrived, I think.

So, well said.

Yeah, so here we are.

Well done. And you look fantastic right out of the shower before you pick up G. Well done. You gotta— why you gotta get all that horse off you.

Yeah, it was a must.

Okay, Danielle, your turn. Why are you here tonight?

Um, I mean, same as you guys. I'm looking to grow as an individual and as a couple. And I think it's kind of scary when you feel called to lead, because even though we've been together for, you know, 25 years, there's still this element where you're like, we're not perfect, and it's scary. But then you have this like nudge and this calling that it's like You're qualified. And if we have gone through some of the shit that we've gone through, it's— I feel like it's selfish not to share because number one, it gives other couples permission. And number two, it opens up dialog. And number three, it's— you allow yourself some grace inside of your relationship. And unfortunately, I think a lot of relationships end because they think they're wrong or broken or nobody's like them, or maybe they shouldn't be together. And Garrett and I are like very polar opposites. And I'm like, if we can figure it out, like, we can definitely help a lot of couples. And we've always been asked to do something on the couple side, or it was always like Wake Up Warrior and Warrior Women. And I was like, you know, I don't— the Wake Up Warrior Women thing's not my passion, but I would love to do something with my husband. If anything, I feel like if you do something and you get something out of it as yourself, then other people will learn and grow too. So that's kind of why I'm here. Not to say I've figured it all out, but I'm looking to learn and grow just like you guys.

Beautiful.

All right, well, we got another couple joining us too. Jason. Good to see you, Amazing Savage. I know you guys are kind of driving right now. You want to have your wife answer this one for you? You want to take it while you're driving? She trust you on this one?

Yeah, just, I jumped in a little bit late to the question. Good to see you again. How's everything? What are we covering? What we're gonna look, what we're looking to get out of it?

Yeah, just why come while you're driving? You two are amazing. Talk to me. Why be part of this?

Yeah, no. No, absolutely love it. So we're actually driving out to date night right now, so this came on a perfect night, um, for us. Just looking back to reconnect, we've gone through, um, a lot of health issues over the last couple years, a lot of financial stress as we go through a transition in kind of a work— just looking to get back on the same page, rebuild kind of the imposter game together, just get us kind of dialed in again and just get focused into the just reconnection of, of where we were beforehand and just create something bigger.

Beautiful.

Is your wife, wife open to sharing tonight?

I think, uh, Warrior— yeah, so Warrior was a big thing for him. Where, like, I kind of knew everything that was going on because he did, like, fill me in. So, like, I've known the court for and all of that. And Garrett, you know, but for everybody else, Warrior is why we are together. It's why we're married together. We had some issues, and the only reason that everything turned around and we ended up getting married is because because of Warrior. So, what better place is there to take our relationship to the next level than where it all started?

I love it. And we loved having you, loved having Jason part of the team for a bit. Excited to have you guys part of this journey. Love that you're on date night with us. Uh, and appreciate you both chiming in, Jake and Mackenzie, Dave, Angie. All right, we're gonna go back to our, our main group with everybody else. So, Silva, go ahead and cue it up and take us back now. Great share, guys.

I didn't realize there was a camera there.

Yeah, so look here when you're talking. If we're looking both straight here, then we look there, and then I'll look at that one. Okay, well, welcome back. We had a chance to share on this. Our cameras won't work on this a little bit far away, but it's okay.

We're in the jungle.

Come here.

I was like, I can't—

I'm just looking at him like, it looks like we're down at deep, deep dark woods. Tunnel down the middle.

We're in the middle of the jungle.

We're dialing this in. We turned the studio new. Okay, cool. And it's different because our TVs are up here to see you guys and our cameras down here. Normally our camera's up here, so we're changing it up. It's like, we'll get it dialed in, we'll get it figured out. So listen, regardless of why you came, I want you to consider there's an opportunity here. Like, regardless of how much Warriors touch you, the thing I'm most interested in touching you is Christ. And what I'm most interested in you is bringing God into the conversation with you two as a couple. Like, there have been a lot of things we've done to create in our marriage, and Danielle are going to share a little bit about our path. Um, that's what you— path of the past, but the path that we've been on the last 2 years. Um, one of the things I came to terms with was the fact that we had done an amazing job as a couple in creating a very high-performance life. And I will come to Danielle to share her thoughts. On this high-performance life that we created?

I think it's, as entrepreneurs, it's a slippery slope. I mean, well, I mean, performance is, it's not just like financially, it's like performance for your spouse. And you have to be careful 'cause I think there's an element of performance because, you know, his needs are different than mine. And so you might have to perform But there's this piece where you can also get lost in this character or this performance. And I would say for Garrett and I, I mean, we've done a lot. When you look back at the last 15 years, you're like, "That was a whirlwind." And I think that oftentimes people wonder the same thing. They're like, "How did you guys hold it all together?" And we didn't all the time. But I think because we were inside of Warrior, of being— when you put yourself on a pedestal, you're constantly not in performance mode, but you like, you have a standard that you're holding for yourself and other people. And but, but like I said, it's a slippery slope. If you're just in performance, it's like you went so far past that, like you're not— you're too much in that character. And I don't think it's necessarily a problem. I think it's just important to kind of keep yourself in check. I don't know if you want me to share more like Specifics, or—

I appreciate you guys. We had gotten to a point where, like, I lived in a narrative, and the narrative was more was better. I didn't know I was doing this. Like, 15 years I've been leading Wake Up Warrior, and the entire premise of our narrative was wake up and have it all, right? It wasn't until 2022 where the idea that taking knee to God even entered the equation. And the idea of being free had not even entered the equation until 2022. So we had gone 10 years here at Wake Up Warrior teaching a premise which we all believed. Wake up, stop lying, pursue having it all across body, being, balance, and business. And we went through some stages we noticed with the men here, myself included, where we accessed deep levels of power. And then we linked that up to production. And we got fit. And we meditated. And we took our wives on dates. And we increased sexuality and communication and intimacy. And then we kept leading our kids and making more money. And it worked. And we had hundreds of us that arrived at this place of having it all. The houses, the sports cars, the life, the fitness, we had it all. And yet all of us had come to this interesting truth, which was none of us actually felt free. Took 10 years to get there. And it took enough of us arriving at this place of having the wealth and having fitness and having the relationship and the dates and all the things, doing all the right things. And then we made a decision to move to Miami. And I would say Miami was the collapse of our performance. By the summer of last year?

Well, I feel like for me, I started to feel like after I had Charlie, which she's 4 years old, it seemed like things were like, they just kind of snowballed. And it was just, there was like so much chaos and life was moving really, really fast to where I was like, I don't know if this is the direction I want to go. Like, I would give up the cars, the houses. Like this, I have like more anxiety and stress with like with this performance that we're growing— it's not even growing, just moving so fast. And in pursuit of getting a little bit lost inside of the performance, I felt like I was losing that connection with you. And I— this is part— people are like, why did you guys move to Miami? Like, I remember seeing Garrett and I felt like his soul was dying. And I was like, okay, this is not— this is not good. Like, I don't want— this is not worth it to me. And I just one night, we were having an intimate conversation and I just thought, we need to slow down. We need to pump the brakes. We need to pump the brakes. And that's why we kind of chose to move to Miami is we needed a change of pace. We needed to pump the brakes. We needed to recalibrate because the direction that we were going, and I think this happens a lot in business and in relationships, it's almost like you can feel yourself spiraling, but you're like, I got this, I got this. So no, we're good. No, we've been through so much. We're good, we're good. But you're always gonna have times inside of your relationship where you can spiral and you have to kind of bring it back in and get back on track. And so for us, it felt a little bit reckless, it felt a little bit dangerous, and it was just this point of like, hey, let's pump the brakes in our relationship and ground ourself to see where we're at and reconnect in a lot of ways. 'Cause I feel like there was amazing years, and I'm sure a lot of you have experienced, you get another year or two in and you're like, what the fuck happened? You're like, we were doing good and then Now I feel like I'm in a funk again. And I think that's just a part of marriage and relationships is to always kind of like get back on track. Like you're not, it's not happily ever after XYZ. And that's probably why a lot of you guys are here on this call. 'Cause you're like, okay, like I'm in a funk or I wanna be better or whatever it is. And so we got to this place where we arrived at Miami and it is a different beast here. And I think a piece of us, we're still going like 100 miles an hour. And then we moved to Miami and we get invited to every yacht and every party and every this. And I'm just like, the end of last year, I'm like, I need like to slam on the brakes right now. Like, it was just, it was just a lot. And I think that sometimes the noise can be a distraction.

So I'll give it to you like real, real, real. We came to Miami and the intention, Daniel Sow had kind of reached into our world and said the game we had been creating was actually creating disconnection. So our world had moved so fast and become so big with $20 million house, supercars in the garage, like the lifestyle we were living, the push we were making was so intense just in the energy to move that quick. So getting to Miami, her intention was to slow down, but I agree, hooked up with Grant Cardone, love the Cardones absolutely. And of course everything became 10x. And truly I came here with the intention to slow down and I put it 100 miles an hour faster. So anything I was doing in California, I just doubled down. And we got to a point by last summer where between the arena events and moving and traveling and events and this and all the network and everything we were doing, Danielle was collapsing. Like, for the first time, things stopped being fun for us. The house wasn't fun. We would go on vacations, stay in these 5-star hotels, and nothing had savor anymore. Like, we couldn't go to one more party. There wasn't one more networking event. I didn't care about speaking at one more event. And we kept— we looked at each other in the summer of last year and we're like, What the fuck is happening? Like, we should be happy, and we were and have been happy many, many, many, many, many moments along the way. But we arrived at this place where we had to get very honest with ourselves. Somehow, amidst this drive to produce a bigger life for us together that worked for so long, wasn't working anymore. And it's been an incredibly intense 12 months. Not because of money, not because of business, because the thing that we missed was deep, profound soul connection. And so for the last 12 months, we have been at war individually and as a couple to restore, strip away, purify, cut away, get rid of, disconnect from, disassociate from a life that had served us for a very long time. And at the core of this was God, and God was calling us back to a new place. And it was confusing, frustrating, and I'm very open, very honest with my guys. I'm very open, honest with everybody. For me, it was very hard because the image and the idea I'd created of who I was and who Danielle had been, we were buried under these man and woman we had created. And so for the past 12 months, we had been undigging. And we got to a place of purity in our own conversation, our connection that just led us to a place of deeper freedom individually and as a couple. Than we've ever had. And it doesn't mean any of the process we had been on before was wrong, but there's an opening that opens up in every single one of you where there is a drive to go find something different. How many of you can understand what I'm talking about? Hands to camera. And it's different for everybody. It's not about the money. It's not about those things. There's just a moment where God starts calling you and saying, hey, the path that you were on, it worked and it was where I wanted you for a while. But there's a path that I'm calling you on. And that path is going to be radically different. And there is going to be a purifying process that you're going to have to go through individually and as a couple to let go of what was that got you here and move towards something new. Any last thoughts you have on that?

I would just say it's— there's your ideal checklist of what success looks like. And then your box is kind of shattered when you're like, wait, I thought I did everything and I should be happy. And I think a lot of us kind of like live in the land of should. And we tell ourselves we can be, we're grateful, we should, and you should be grateful. But at the same time, you can't live in that space. If you feel like your soul is calling you to go to the next level, it's kind of, for me, it's been like almost an excuse to grow. And so I have to say like, I am grateful. We do have a beautiful house, kids, cars, and all this. But I feel this sense to go. And it was really actually hard for me as a wife to tell Garrett, like, because I didn't want him to feel like I wasn't grateful, that I didn't like all the success that we had. But the success isn't anything if you lose yourself and your partner in the process. Legacy to me isn't about just money. Legacy is about your children, your family, how you teach them, how you interact with your community. Like, that's impact and that's legacy. And sure, you can make great money doing it, but to me, if you have success and you don't have that peace, that's not— that's truly not success. And so there's a piece of me where I'm like, fine, take it all back. It was never mine anyways. This isn't my house, this is God's house, you know? Like, let's— let's— we, we need to strip away some of the noise so that we can recalibrate who we are as individuals and couples. And I think that is so scary, especially as you get older, because you think, I'm in my 40s, I'm in my 50s. Like, I— like, it's scary to admit to yourself that you're like, wow, this isn't where I thought I would be, or wow, I still have a lot more work to do. And you're like, I want to slow down, but I feel like I got more work to do. So I think that's like part of the reason where we wanted to even do this experience is because it's like, even with what you guys see on social media, the podcast, whatever it is, like, we're still in the thick of it. A lot of times. And we have moments of greatness, but just like you, we have moments where we're like, this is really hard. This is really hard. But through that, it comes greatness. And so I have to tell myself when things are really hard, yeah, you might have to make some changes. You have to commit to make those changes. And it's hard, but if you can get out of it, like the person you are on the other side, you're like, wow, I'm so glad that I went through that pain to reveal this new version of myself. And us in a relationship.

So we've identified that there are really 4, at least 4 that we can see stages in this. And we are entering what I would consider to be number 4. And the first one is survival. And Danielle and I, when we first started our relationship— and some of you may be there right now— you're just trying to survive, trying to survive the game. We have 2 toddlers. Well, they're not even toddlers anymore. One turns 7 tomorrow, and the other one turns 5 in December. Like blowing by. But yes, we have been in the toddler game for the past 5 or 6 years. It was intense, and sometimes it feels like survival. So there's survival mode, and then there's a step into success, which is you start to get momentum. And Living the Warrior's Way and doing things— we watch this happen. You start to feel it. And me and Danielle went through that process of higher levels of production across our lives, and we started feeling success again. We had built everything, imploded in 2009, walked the pit till 2012, rose and kept rising from 2012 clear to 2026. But somewhere around 2021, 2020, somewhere in that place, high performance kicked in. We went from just success to performance. We didn't know we were doing it because the world was giving us trophies. We were doing the date nights, we were doing the trips, we were spending time together, we were doing all of the checklist things, and it worked, and it— we felt it. And then we entered this place where the performance couldn't satisfy anymore. And performance was a higher level than success, and it was way beyond survival, but a different level of survival kicked in. And this is where I believe we're stepping into now, which is covenant. Which is an ability to connect with each other at a level that we had connected when we first met, but somewhere amidst 5 children, the build of a kingdom and a collapse of it, the rise of 2 brands, and the chaos and stress, lawsuits and pressure and social media pressure and life and teenagers losing their minds and toddlers trying to stay up all night, DVDs and high-risk pregnancies and preeclampsia and just all of this going on while managing and leading thousands of men, leading thousands of families. This was a lot. And what we saw was we weren't being punished. There was just a question that came into us, which is, is there a powerful place beyond this idea of performance? Could there be a place called presence? Which is when the idea of covenant first began for us. So I want you to ask yourself a question, and I'm gonna give you 90 seconds to sit, and I want you to write in it. When you look at your current relationship, where are you? Like, are you currently in survival? And it's hard because you may look at some areas of marriage and life may be survival. Some of you may be in struggle with money, and so you're like, yeah, I feel like I'm in survival. I want you just to come up above your marriage and look just at your marriage. Are you currently in survival? Are you getting momentum with success? Have you entered high performance? Or are you in this sacred place of covenant? Has there something— is there something brewing inside you now? And typically, I have only seen men who have been able— men and women who've been able to hit the gamut. They're not in survival. Success comes. They got the skills for success. They've hit high performance, like a man in business who no longer is building a company to provide for his family. That was me. It was way— it wasn't about providing anymore. It wasn't about protecting anymore. It was about something bigger. It was about something in me, what I had built, which I didn't know. And God was very clear with me in last year: you built a monument unto yourself. And we have hundreds of men in our networks and Warrior who have done real estate and software and construction and built these massive companies And now we're hitting about 45 to 50 to 52, and they're asking themselves questions they've never asked before, which is like, what am I doing?

Hmm.

I just turned 50 2 weeks ago, and I'm like, not in my 30s anymore. I'm not in my 40s anymore. I'm now 50. What am I doing? So I'm going to give you 90 seconds. I want you to look at this for yourself and any other thoughts you have around it. So we're going to put some music on. I just want you to write. You don't have to share it with your spouse yet. We're going to have a share here in just a second. But where would you consider yourself to be right now? Okay, question goes. We're going in 3, in 2, in 1, off we go. Okay, so I'm gonna actually call on Lori and Steven. So let's go and unmute them and have them come on in. I have watched you two rise as a couple in the last 18 months in a significant way. Talk about— and I want to hear from both of you— what— and Lori, let's start with you. Just share from your experience what has opened up for you two as a couple in the last 12 months. It's really been about 18 months, but the acceleration in the last 12.

Freedom, safety, peace, trust.

His face—

like, I just feel pure freedom in my marriage. I, I— because he was such a jerk that I was afraid to be me, and so now I'm just experiencing being, being me with him He's my new and improved husband. Yesterday was our 7-year anniversary, and we're doing good. But yeah, it's— it just feels so safe. If there's anything wrong, I can go to him with zero fear now.

Can I— can I say, like, for women, safety is such a big thing, and men are so reactive. So when you say he's a jerk, like, I know exactly what you're talking about. And like, the minute they just kind of like ease up on that reactivity, we're like, we just kind of like melt. We're like, oh my God, like I can, I can like talk to you. This is, this is kind of nice.

It is. He has a new thing that he says to me and it's working. If all you guys want to pay attention, what's that thing you said yesterday on Warriors for Christ?

Trust first, last.

You said, you said—

that said a lot.

That you agree, you're right.

Oh yeah, no matter what, you always and you never. You just want to be logical and tell her always and never is impossible. She don't want to hear that. She's used to— I know, right? I never do that.

So if I have something that's wrong, he's like, you're right. And, and so then I— my guard is down and I can spill my heart, and, and then he just loves me up. And then I feel like I, I got it out and now I can be a better me for me and him.

He's not trying to solve the problem. He's like, you're right. And you're like, oh, thank you.

It's huge. Try it, I dare you guys.

He's always been right and never been wrong. See what I did there?

Always and never.

Happy wife, happy life.

Stephen, talk about the shit that's happening to you. You've had about 12 months. I've watched you too. You know, you guys ushered in here, Warrior, the idea of Eden Sex. We had talked about it. We got Christmas ornaments. We got the Christmas tree behind you. Talk to me. Yeah, so about what, uh, what is it? What shifted in you as a man last 12 months?

Uh, you and I had this unusual fascination with the Old Testament, especially Genesis, especially in the beginning. And, and they were naked and unashamed, so don't take much of imagination to figure out what was going on. And, uh, and then we made it weird. So this idea of Eden sex, that sex could be more than just a physical thing, that it would be spiritually and it would be healing. And I created an environment where we could both heal from previous failed marriages and all the baggage. And that we were damaged goods, and rightfully so. So when I would pick on fixing her, guess what that made her want to do? Double down on how she was and focus on how jacked up I was, which was true. So I just left her alone and lived the Warrior's Way and started to rapidly become the best version of myself and created a gap and invited her to join me in that gap. Next thing you know, she was on the app and stacking and I've told anybody that'll fog a mirror that stacking saved our lives, saved our marriage, because, um, if I was a jerk and she told me I was a jerk, I would prove her right by doubling down and being reactive and attacking her. She would retreat and go stack it and send it to me. I could still have that emotional reaction but alone and not damage her, and then have a mature response and approach her lovingly and once again tell her, you know, you're right, I was a jerk. And then I stopped showing up as a jerk because it kept being put in a mirror in my face. And we would share stacks with one another, and that was a safe place to be able to dump our truth on the altar and not have to get a jerk reaction from the other one.

See, it was a thing like though, the stack— you trusted the stack more than you trusted me. So since I stacked and I did 700 of them when I would stack and share it with Stephen, he accepted it more because it was the stack. It wasn't me. But then he didn't like, and sometimes he would come away from the stack going, ah, to me. And then he stopped doing that and came to me and he's like, I'm so sorry. I get it. I get it now.

Yeah.

So stacking, stacking's the trick. I think it's both of you.

I think it's hard as a couple because like, we say things that aren't real thought out. And even times we're like, I don't know why I said that or I'm feeling that. So a way to like process it, you're like, oh, I have a better understanding of myself. Let me send him this stack because we say— I do this to Garrett all the time. I did it yesterday. I like said something like, I don't— this isn't what I really want to say, you know? And I think the hardest thing inside of a relationship is communication. And we're all human. So it's just trying to get on the same page without triggering one another.

So next week, next week on, uh, next Thursday, next Thursday night, we're going to introduce sacking. So those who are not aware of what this is, we're going to talk about this tool. We have seen this tool from the man's side and the female side. We've also got some protocols in place for couples to be able to use it. I mean, Danielle communicated with me in it, uh, 2 days ago on a concept that we have, a topic that we have been moving around about resentment from, and her lack of trust because of things that happened 15, 20 years ago. 10 years ago, 5 years ago, and even this year, just things that have built up. And there was no way for her— her and I could not communicate these things to each other in a way that would bring it to resolution. And after using the tools for herself and being able to communicate it to me in a different way, I could see it, which led to our walk and talk this morning for an hour that had us uncover even more. So we're going to talk and experience that tool next week. Beautiful job, Stephen Laurie. Thank you so much for sharing. So I'm going to give you 3 questions. I'm going to actually put these questions in the chat that I want you to think about. Here's a question number 1, and each of us are going to work on our own on these questions for a few moments, um, and give you a few minutes with some music on to answer them for yourself. You're not going to be sharing with your spouse yet. Uh, where have we been lying to ourselves about the actual state of our connection? Right. Danielle and I, without knowing it, had been lying to ourselves for a couple years about the state of our connection. We were connected, but there was a deeper level of connection neither one of us either had the words to speak to, or our life was moving so fast there was no space between toddlers, teenagers, and rising companies, and moves, and all the rest of things we were doing, and travel. There was so much going on that we couldn't see it. So there's question number 1: where have we been lying to ourselves about the actual state of our connection? And we'll type up and put these questions in the chat too. Question number 2: What is the one thing that you appreciate about your spouse that you don't say enough? What's the thing you appreciate the most about your spouse that you haven't said enough? This is a challenge that had existed for Danielle and I. A lot of her resentment made it difficult for her to appreciate things that I was doing right. There was resentment in her that was so deep because of things from 20 years ago, 10 years ago, 5 years ago, things I had said, things I had done. So in depreciation was tough to get out. So I didn't hear it very often in certain categories in life. And so not hearing it had me feel a certain kind of way, which had me distance, had her distance, and us constantly being in this tug of war. So question number 2, what is the one thing you appreciate most about your spouse that you haven't said enough? And question number 3, if God transformed our marriage over the next year, What would that look like? So if God transformed your marriage over the next year, what would that look like? We're living in a reality right now that was impossible for us a year ago. The way we talk, how we have conversations, the depth of those conversations that we can sit in for hours at a time and neither one of us blows up, I don't get reactive, there's no reframing, there's an opportunity to actually discuss. That was impossible 12 months ago. We could do it, but we had to have a therapist there, or we had to do it in a different way, or we had to send stacks to each other. So like, being able to sit with each other in that conversation seemed impossible a year ago. So 3 questions again: where have I been lying, or where have we been lying to ourselves about the actual state of our connection? Number 2, what is the one thing, uh, about you, about your spouse, that you haven't said enough that you appreciate? And number 3, if God transformed our marriage over the next year, what would What would that look like? Okay, so we're gonna sit with these questions for a second. And my team's typed them up and put them in the chat there for you. So if you forgot those or didn't get them written down, they're in the Zoom chat for you. And we're gonna sit with this for a few minutes. This is not a time to talk about it yet. You're gonna get a chance to talk about it, but we're gonna write about it for a few minutes. So we're gonna take 3 minutes. I just want you to look at those 3 questions, take down some brief notes. For those that are here with their partner, you're gonna get a chance to share some of your answers directly with your partner. For those that are here without your partner, your partner. We're going to give you an assignment to do that while they're going through the share. Okay, so we've got 3 minutes to answer these questions. If you're clear about the questions, give me a thumbs up. Okay, here we go. Let's answer them up. We got 3 minutes. We're going in 3, we're going in 2, we're going in 1. Off we go. Okay, so we got some chance to write on it on our own. Uh, Danielle and I are going to demo because here in a moment you're going to get a chance to share and answer these questions with each other. If you're here by yourself, I'll give you an assignment here in a second on what to do while the couples are sharing. So we're going to start with question number 1. Where have we been lying to ourselves about the actual state of our connection? Danielle and I have talked about this one quite a bit. Your thoughts and feelings on this question?

Um, I mean, there's a certain point where the checklist helps you create consistency, and I'm a very consistent person. But then there's a point to where you're like, this checklist is no longer like serving me. And like I said, Garrett and I, we would do the date nights, we would do the trips, but with the chaos of our businesses growing individually and then having toddlers and teenagers, like, we would get to this point where vacations were just like, fucking drink all day. And then there was like no connection because you're under the influence, you're numb at some level. And it got to— that's why like a lot of our vacations, I was like, I need a vacation for my vacation. But life had gotten so traumatic to instead of like look at the lie or not look at the lie, but like instead of have a tough conversation, we were both kind of like in the beginning it was fun, but it got to a point where, like I said, it was too much. It was like, all right, we're on vacation, hit up mimosas, grab a margarita, backflips off the boat. All right, let's end the night with some shots. And I like, I would just get to the point where I'm like, I was with you. I saw you all weekend and I don't feel like I was with you. I don't really feel like I connected with you. And so, like I said, it was fun for a season and the trips and everything were fun, but when something is no longer serving your relationship, you have to redefine, okay, what is a trip going to look like for us? What is a date night? Do we need to go out every— is date nights always going out and having cocktails? Is it going out with friends and having cocktails? And is that actually— is date night having the intention that that it once did in the beginning when we made this vow to each other. And it didn't. It didn't have the same intention. So for me, that was where we were like lying inside of our relationship, is like doing the checklist without having the correct intentions.

And we were smashing the checklist. I'm talking like 3 date nights a week, sometimes 4, overnight staycations every month, week-long trips every quarter. We have been doing this for years. And it worked in the beginning. But Danielle's right, between the pressure and stress of kids and the business and life, it—

we—

vacation turned into this—

this numbness.

It was wild. And in the last, like, probably year and a half, we started noticing it, and then we really started noticing it last summer. And we were looking at each other like— we would go to these amazing, amazing 5-star exotic resorts in Europe and different places. We'd be on the plane coming home going, how are you?

I like you.

It was like this recovery game for us. It was just like, I don't know what we did, but I think we took some pictures of it.

I don't feel bad. It just got to the point, I'm sure every successful entrepreneur, like, it's like you wake up with your head in the sand and you're like, I don't want to do this anymore. What am I doing? Like, we didn't go like that hard in the paint, but we like went hard enough in the paint where I was like, this isn't fun anymore.

Yeah.

You know?

Second question, what is one thing I appreciate, appreciate about you that I haven't said enough? And I'll go on that one. Your consistency. Like amidst all of the ups and downs, me waking up, falling asleep, waking up, falling asleep, high performance, pushing, growing, constantly intense, intense, intense. Like you've just stayed consistent, consistent with— you're just steady in our house. You are steady. You're steady for my wild teenagers. You're steady for our wild toddlers. You're steady for everything that we've been about. You just keep staying. And I know I don't say that enough. If you were even remotely as close as wild as I am, this would be a problem. So question number 3, if God transformed our marriage over the next year, what would that look like to you?

Garrett and I have built so much individually with our companies, and sometimes it feels like we're great volleyball parents, high-fiving on the way out, doing the checklist, physically fit, like doing everything, and I, told him part of the reason I want to do this program is I was like, I want to do something together that lights our souls on fire, that we're learning and growing together. I want to be in this partnership because for me, that, that a partnership is safety and security. Like, that's all I've always wanted, nothing more than to build something with you. And we've had an immense amount of success together, and it was really hard to work with you because you were stepping into my world with hair and I was stepping into your world. It was like our own thing that we built. So we were almost protective of like, no, don't tell me how to do this shit. This is my thing I built. And so now I wanted this partnership where we were kind of navigating and building it together. So what was the question? In 12 months, like, I just— I want to feel this partnership that I feel like is a little bit lacking in our relationship?

I would say that we have been fantastic strategic partners, which means we just are. We're great strategic partners at running our household, running with our kids, both running our world and intertwining our worlds like this. And this is a new season for us to move into a place where everything we build and do is together, which we haven't done before. She builds, I build, we come together, we cross a little bit, and then we keep going. So we're giving an example of the conversation we're having with it. We're going to give you a chance to have a conversation with your spouse about it. We're going to take 5 minutes on this and just let you talk. So if you're with your spouse, this is the time for you two to talk. If you're here by yourself, this is a chance for you to go deeper. And what I'm going to encourage you to do is to look at answering these questions and then being prepared to share them with your spouse in one of three ways. One, send them 1, send them a video. 2, send them an audio. Or 3, save it for a conversation that you're committed to taking with them in the next 24 hours. So being able to answer these 3 questions, so go deeper on them. So if you're by yourself, you're not with your spouse, start prepping what that is. And either you're gonna shoot a video during this time, you're gonna shoot an audio, or you're gonna prepare the text for just kind of a frame for you to be able to have the conversation. If you're here with your spouse, the next 5 minutes is gonna be sharing time with you two. So just keep yourself muted. Turn to your spouse, and we get to answer these questions. These are not going to be shared with the group. They're just going to be shared with you and your partner. If you're clear about what we're doing here for the next 5 minutes, give me a thumbs up. Okay, beautiful. It's time to share. Let's go in 3, let's go in 2, let's go in 1. Time to talk to the one you love. All right, beautifully done. So if you, if you have more conversation, we'll continue. Danielle and I, when we get on subjects like— I mean, I'm telling you right now, we'll go days and days. Between conversation and 4-hour texts back and forth throughout the day. This has happened many times where we're trying to express ourselves. How many of you have done the—

The battle text?

—delonged overtime text game with each other? Hands to the camera.

And then you're like, gah, half my day. This is me. This was me literally yesterday. I'm pretty sure we were arguing about this call. And then I was like, he doesn't trust me. And then I was like— trying to get shit done, and I was like, I need to go like stack this and like not like, like I need to get my shit out right now.

And it worked. It worked. So here's that. We're going to go to two scriptures. I want you to pull up your Bibles. We're going to go to Genesis 2:24. And where are they? The Barefoots, if you two will be ready, we're going to have you two share here in just a second. So we're going to go to Genesis 2:24. Dave, I'm going to have you read for us and we're going to go to Amos 3:3, but first we'll stop in Genesis 2:24. As Stephen said, I became— when I really took on the Christ conversation 4 years ago, like I couldn't get out of the book of Genesis for 6 to 9 months, maybe almost a year. And I was fascinated with the entire genesis of life. I was like, what was the original purpose of this game? And part of it was the conversation of unity and marriage, the creation of Adam and Eve. And that entire dynamic. So we're going to read this verse, Genesis 2:24, and let's go ahead and bring in the Barefoots. And I'm going to have to go ahead and bring David. There you go, you amazing human. David, you don't have your glasses on. Let your wife push the unmute button. That's right. Just let her be a helpmeet. Let her be a help me, Dave. All right, we got this. Unmute, maybe.

Just tried me.

There we go. Okay, so go ahead and read us Genesis 2:24.

For this reason, a man shall leave his father and his mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked, but they were not ashamed.

Read it one more time for us.

For this reason, a man shall leave his father and his mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked, but they were not ashamed. What does that—

what does that mean to you? What do you see there for you?

Uncleave from all the stuff you've known from your childhood, basically. And all the rules and regulations that you were under in their household, and go and be present with the Lord and allow him to show you the way and create your own family. And be, be willing to be naked to each other, trust each other, be intimate, be open, be present.

Tell them the moment in bed.

Okay, so this is going back like 15 years ago. And, um, we had been fighting, whatever, and we ended up going to bed. We had sex, and it dawned on me after we had sex, I'm like, oh my God, our parents are in bed with us. We still think the way they think. We still— it was so gross to me. And I'm like, honey, we've been married for whatever, umpteen years, and we're still not cleaved to each other. And it was so bizarre that this scripture that you had us read was the thing that jumped out to us years ago. And from there, we were able to just start chipping away at that. And when I, when I say like rules and regulations, just all the things that you think of from childhood, you know, from simple things to complex things. And it's been a journey the last 13, 14 years in that space, not doing— not thinking that we had to do those things and be that way anymore with each other and be ruled by those old ways.

So now, Tom, what you appreciated in me— because I'll come back to the scripture.

Okay, so let me read it. So the one thing that I have not said enough lately about David is his commitment to always getting better and learning, um, and growing and having a deeper connection with God, but also with himself. And I told him, I said, you know, I really just appreciate that, that the connection with God has been there for a long time, but through the stacking process over the last several years, 3, 4 years, whatever it's been has allowed him to have this deeper connection with himself. And what's unraveled from that place is his ability to be present with himself in a— just a new way. And he likes himself, and he thinks he's cool, and he's comfortable with himself. He's naked with himself. And for the first time— I'm gonna cry— our marriage, it feels like he's not trying to change himself, but he is opening— it's like he's open arms to himself, and he really loves himself. And I told him, in that place of presence with yourself, that's where you're gonna go from like this 3D David to this 5D, and you're not going to have to work so hard anymore at body being balanced business. Things are just going to start. I feel like quantum physics, like things are just going to start collapsing. And, um, and we've seen some of that, but it— yes. So, well, thank you.

And so when, when it says, those who leave his father's mother and be joined, they'll become one flesh, leaving my father and my mother, it's not literal. It's that I wasn't willing to let go and honor myself. So I couldn't give all myself to her. I couldn't— the limitation of leading from here instead of here. So, um, yeah, scripture is powerful, and so is this journey. Thank you, Garrett and Danielle.

And Danielle, amazing to watch you too and to experience it. And I get to be with your husband, you know, many days throughout the week, and to watch David, your growth, my growth, Stephen's growth, the team's growth here at Warrior, just as Christ has come in a serious way and ripped us apart. And I agree with you, this is the same thing that's been occurring for me, is a return to an understanding of love for me and who God is in me and who I am as a sovereign son, knowing that most of us have operated as orphans, which was wild 'cause Dave and I have known each other for 3, 4 years now, 3 years. And I go back, I sent him a picture this morning from 2 years ago at the training facility in Dana Point And I told him, I said, bro, can you even understand how different we are as men from what we were 24 months ago? So beautiful share, both of you, um, inside of that. David, you go to another scripture for me. Go to Amos 3:3, and we're going to check this out. If you guys want to follow along with it, what you're going to find here with, uh, I, I shared a little bit of this on social media this morning, like the Bible has completely devoured me, like in a way that I was not expecting at all. And it's become a core piece to everything we do too. I'm here at Wake Up Warrior. Yes, go ahead and take it, uh, take that on for us.

Amos 3:3: Do two people walk together unless they have agreed to meet?

Super simple. Read it again.

Do two people walk together unless they have agreed to meet?

Great question.

Wow. What do you see there, David?

So I see, um, so many years where I claimed I agreed to walk together, but I wasn't even available to meet. So I might have said I was available to meet. And so when I look at what Stephen and, and Laura shared, the that piece of Stephen being able to just hold space. There's an agreement that's necessary so I could stay quiet and just wish her to be happy so I could be happy. And that happy wife, happy life statement that came up earlier, the plague of modern man being told, just as long as she's happy. And so for the conflict-avoiding, people-pleasing little bitches in the audience, um, that I was strong in my silence, but really I was weak. And I wasn't in agreement to be together. I wasn't able to make that agreement until I was able to receive love and love myself at a capacity that now I can agree to meet. And so our meetings have become better in oneness together here and every place else— body, soul, and spirit. So That's what I get. Can I—

I just want to— I just want to say something if I can. I'm sorry. So, um, just about the whole stacking process. So I want to say maybe 5 years ago, before he started coming out to Dana Point, he had been watching, you know, Warrior and stuff on whatever you were— I don't know if it was live or whatever. And it was just— I'm just being honest— it was just one more thing that he was delving into And I kept saying, you know, as I was walking by the computer and he was listening to you, I'm like, really, honey? I'm like, one more guy, one more thing. I'm like, this guy is tatted from head to toe. He sounds so angry. I'm like, what are you doing? I'm like, really? And I was like, okay, what the fuck ever, just be happy. And it was one of those things where I was like disconnecting, but I just wanted him to be happy. And maybe fast forwarding about a year and a half from that point, when he started stacking, I would say with it consistently, because I don't think you've ever not stacked consistently, maybe a month or two in the beginning, but, um, probably 6 to 12 months, 6 to 8 months later, like, I started just seeing some changes. And I'm not saying that stacking like saved his life, but I really truly believe in my heart of hearts that stacking for him was the actual tool that allowed him not just to get his feelings out, it allowed him to connect with who he truly is from a place that I had never seen, that he had never experienced from my understanding with communicating with him. And, um, he's, he's— it's, it's not an addiction. It's like this beautiful commitment. I'll walk by him in the morning, he's stacking. If he didn't finish one of his 2 or 3 stacks for the day, you know, after dinner, he's sitting there stacking. He loves to do it. It's like become this beautiful— it's like a, another appendage. It's like a part of who he is. And I really do believe that it's given him this safe place where he has given himself the self-love to learn and grow and find out more about not only who he is, but who God is trying to communicate to him, who he truly is. So thank you for the Stacking Process, because it's changed his life and ours.

Thank you for sharing. We, we watch it. Watch Happen to David. I mean, it's same thing. My, my girls know. They come around the hall every morning at 5:30. Danielle knows exactly where I will be at 4:00 AM every morning, Monday through Sunday. My 5— my 5 or 4 and 7-year-old will run down the hallway. They know if they come down— he's happy if he stacks. She, she— there's been some days, not a lot, but there's a handful of days every year where it doesn't happen, and she'll— by 8:00 in the morning, she's like, I need you to go stack because I can't deal with this.

Like, not a 2-hour stack, not a 2-hour stack, but like, go get in a I think that like for people it's like, like communication is one of the hardest things and like getting all that out like first thing in the morning, you're like, oh, okay. You're probably like, well, at least my experience with him, he's just like a happier person.

So we're going to— great introduction to what stacking is. Next week we're going to be going through that. I'm going to drop a link down in the chat. This is a $1 trial to the Warrior app. I would encourage everyone who's here with us because we're going to actively get into some stacking specific for marriage next week. We're going to show you some specific tools. My ultimate goal here in what we're creating here, this is our very first time, first time doing this in years and also doing it this way. We have so many powerful men and women who are part of our networks here at Warrior who love Christ, who also found so much power, and we've watched their marriages rise. So you're going to get an inflow even in the next week. A ton more couples are going to be here. We're going to have a little bit different experience next week, but I would encourage you to get the app Like, this is not a pitch, it's an opportunity for this, truly, because I have seen what this tool can do. And with the improvements we've made to it with our AI features, Warrior AI, it's simpler now than it's ever been. Our ultimate goal is to get men and women stacking and to be able to have you through Bible stacking, prayer stacking, connection, to be able to find a bridge like Danielle and I have had, and like some of the couples you've already heard from tonight, a place to be able to communicate so that we can create and ultimately create a group of couples who love God, who are committed to having it all, and free men and women who live in a place of presence and truth with each other. And so all of this though is aligning under one idea, which is winning the impossible married game. Like, how do we create games to where we are all together, that as a couple we create together? And Danielle and I have created together, but we have spent a lot of our creation individually. So there's her visions and my visions, and we're bringing this together and dancing in a way in the last 12 months that is different than ever how we danced before. And it ultimately required us to let go of the trophies that the world was giving us for how we had created for 20-plus years together. And with that letting go came a new birth of connection and opportunity. And so We're going to spend time here in these calls. They're meant to have a challenge. I have a challenge for you that we're going to take on. We've dropped the link in there for you guys to check out if you want to get a trial to it. It's a dollar. You can try the app out here for the next month with us and get a feel for it, particularly coming into next week. We have a training on it this week if you want to jump on that. We'll show you how to do it. And then we have one simple challenge for tonight. Okay. And this challenge is going to be sometime this week with your spouse. We're going to return a report on it next week. This is going to be simpler than a date night. Like I told you, Danielle and I became masters of the checklist, and it worked until it didn't work. And then we came back to simplicity again, which is how God works with all of us. We get a little complex, brings us back to simple. So we're going to spend 1 hour, no phones. You don't have to go anywhere, but you could. 1 hour. And during that conversation with your spouse. No phones, no kids, no friends, no TV, no distraction. Just you two sitting either on a couch, at the beach, in your car, wherever you're sitting. And in that conversation, you're going to be discovering, using the energy of curiosity, who are you today? Like, this is the question: who are you today? Danielle and I have talked about this. The reason why divorce is self is so appealing to so many people, and why divorce came up as an option for us so many times over the last 23 years was because there's a piece of the mind that wants to be known, and a soul that wants to be known for who you are now, not the scars of 25 years together. Which is why the idea, and why so many couples that I'm meeting are getting divorced right now, because the weight of trying to meet that person with who they are today in contrast to who they've been is very difficult. And if I didn't have a wife who was committed to her own growth and committed to her own relationship with God, and myself included, it would be impossible for us to forge this now. Which is why I understand, and I am not— essentially, I'm not against divorce in the way that people think. I get it, some couples, they're just not going to work out because one or both are unwilling to do the work and allow God into their life, to let go of what this narrative has been and meet that person who they are today. It's why we have affairs that have happened with guys in our programs with the wives that cheated, the men have cheated, because for the first time this person in maybe years at a gym, at work, gets seen for who they are today with no baggage, no past. I get— and I get it, it's an illusion, but nonetheless it shows us a principle that's happening more and more and more. And Christian or otherwise, it's happening just as much with as many Christian couples as people who do not call themselves Christian. Because the power of being seen and met with who you are now is so intense that women will throw away their entire 20-year marriages, men will throw away 20 years of marriage in order to feel that feeling to be seen in the brilliance of who you are now, not the mistakes of 10 years ago or the financial collapse of a decade ago or the stupid decisions or things you said last week. You get to be met for who you are now. Not saying that that's a foundation for life, but it's a desire that all of us have inside. So you're going to spend 1 hour and it's a simple question. Who are you today? And the energy is curiosity. And when you're having this conversation with your spouse, you're gonna take turns asking the question and answering. But here's the caveat. You can pick a time on your clock. The other person does not get, once you ask the question, you do not get to interject. We're going to practice this week giving space for your partner to talk. Danielle and I had gotten into patterns for years where she would start talking and then I would be thinking already what I was going to say. And then she would say something, I'd, "That's not accurate." I don't want to hear it. And then we would be in this tug of war. And over the last couple of years, we've been able to hold space for each other in a different way. So two piece with this, we're going to do a 1-hour conversation, no phones, no television, no kids, no friends, nobody, just you two. And we're coming in with a simple question, who are you today? And you can use any version of questions around that with curiosity. You're going to give your partner a opportunity to talk for a couple of minutes. You're going to set your clock for 1 hour. And this is the challenge for the week. OK, going forward, we're going to ultimately have a network. Where we'll be able to participate in this together, be able to meet even through the week and— —these exercises. Every week we're going to have an exercise. Every month we're going to have a challenge. We'll talk a little bit more about what that's going to look like next week. But if you're clear about what the assignment is for this week and what the challenge is for this week, give me a thumbs up to the camera so I know. All right, perfect. Because we want you guys to be able to connect. Ultimately, we want you to be able to find other couples that you can connect with, become friends with, and bond with. Through the process. So that's our assignment. We'll be sending out— everybody that registered too, we'll send out the assignment to you so you guys got it in email. Danielle, final thoughts as we wrap up, say a prayer, and we're done for tonight.

I would say don't be scared of conversations. I think a lot of times, you know, women or whatever, we want to avoid conflict, and so we don't open up conversations, and that's what builds up resentment. And so even in this challenge this week of an hour, if it goes south, like, that's okay. Come back to the call. Let's course correct. Let's get back on track. Garrett and I spent years arguing.

Every date night for about 10 years.

We'd go on date nights, and I'm like, why are we doing this? It just turns into an argument. But without communication, you can't get past that. So even within this challenge, allow yourself some grace if it gets a little bit heated, because that's part of the process. OK.

That brings us to the last one. Conclusion today. We're going to add some more tools in next week with the stack. We're also going to introduce the network next week so that you guys can participate, communicate. We can do things on a daily basis, couples together. Um, this was our first run. How many of you got some value, at least some insight, in being here with us tonight? Give me a thumbs to the camera. Love the energy. Let's go ahead and close up with a prayer. Go ahead and close your eyes. Let's wrap it up with God. Go ahead and take a deep breath in. And release. Just be here for a second. There's a moment every night you lay down together and it's just you two. And there's moments where you're sitting on the couch together and it's just you two. And sometimes the most powerful thing that you can experience is just being there with each other. No words, no talking, just sitting. Father, as we wrap up this experience tonight, there have been openings that have occurred, a unification of a number of couples and individuals who are now committed to a new charge. Father, this week as these amazing humans dive deep into the word with you, they go into prayer together, they have these conversations and take on the challenge of the week. We ask that your spirit would be over their home and in their lives, that they would not only do the things required to get themselves into a place to hear your voice, but Father, that your voice would be here active in this experience every week with us. And that throughout the week we can begin to see the rising unification of one flesh become a reality. That we as couples could find a new power in you, that is found in us, and that in us we could see it in our partners this week. Father, use this moment and use every other moment in between the time we come back a week from now to guide us in a way that you plan, in a way that is best for us, purifying what needs to be purified and elevating what needs to be elevated and eradicating what needs to be done with. We're grateful for the opportunity to be here, to live in a country where we can do these types of experiences freely. And Father, as we wrap tonight, we ask for an anointing upon each one of the couples that feel the deep commitment to take their marriage to another place. That the guilt and shame, anger, frustration, disappointment, resentment, and any of the feelings that keep us separated, that Father, you begin to work into their lives through the blood of Christ and begin to move these things, these blocks to connection. And as those blocks begin to move, they would feel an increased power in the kingdom within them from you. You, and that that kingdom power could be transferred to their spouse and a unification could move one step further this week is our prayer as we wrap this amazing experience in the sacred and holy name of Jesus the Christ. Amen. Amen. And deep breath in and release. Go ahead and open your eyes. Great job tonight. For those that came by yourselves, thank you for being here. Bring your spouse next week if you want. We'll send this replay out to you if you want to give them a chance to see it if they're feeling a little nervous. Nobody has to be here, but if they want to be here, we'd love to have them. Have a wonderful night. My wife is ready to eat dinner because she likes to never eat until it's too late, and then she's starving.

It's late for us here. It's like 7:30. I eat like a grandma.

I need to eat and go to bed in like 45 minutes. Just kidding. Have a great night. This is Garrett J White and Danielle K White signing off, saying love and light. Good morning, good afternoon, and