How Staying a Virgin Helped Me Build My Dream Life

I never lost my virginity and now I'm living my dream life. Look, a few years ago when I was chatting with my old friends that I used to hang out with a lot, I was often the guy that was the only one that never partake in intercourse, never did anything sexual. right? And also, fun fact, I never even kissed a woman, right? And I also would— I was known to a certain extent by certain people to be the guy that would never be able to attract any woman, right? I still remember to this day, I was hanging out with two of my best friends, literally best friends at that time, and We were just talking. It was at their house. We were having a fun time playing video games, whatever. And they essentially were showing women, like they were on Instagram, they were doing all of those things. They were showing women to each other, right, that they knew. And then they said, oh, look, that woman, she's ugly. Maybe Samir Gardner, right? Essentially saying that I essentially I'm ugly as well, if that makes sense, right? And that wasn't the only time that something similar happened to me, right? Throughout, I mean, for years, right? Ever since I was very young, I genuinely believed that I just could never even attract a woman, right? I was trying to be the cool kid back in school. That would hang out with the popular kids so that I could attract women, but no woman really noticed me. No woman even wanted to talk to me besides obviously when you're in school, there's like, sometimes you gotta do homework with them, whatever. So maybe I talked to 2 in general, just as casual interactions. And that was just very hard for me. I was seeing the other guys in my school just bragging about how they are able to attract this woman. One guy's in another relationship, one guy is sleeping with that woman. And at that time, obviously, I was also godless, right? I didn't have any form of faith. I mean, I was lost, right? Obviously, I had this PMO problem, this porn masturbation problem at that time, I would play video games 12 to 16 hours a day just to escape life, right? But coming back to the topic of the video, at that time being a virgin was essentially you being a loser at life and you being a— being someone that could sleep around essentially the highest form of winning for those people, right? Or for society nowadays. And so I'm not gonna lie, for, for years, right, that was also a big desire of mine. And thank God, and I'm so grateful actually, right, today, till this day, I mean, that I never had the chance to really go in any of these I mean, to partake in premarital sex, in casual sex. I never ever did, right? And I feel so lucky, obviously, right? But essentially what happened is now I'm living my dream life. Right now I'm in Thailand. I've been traveling for the past 2 months. I've done over 13 countries, and I'm not done yet. Over 13 countries, almost 15, just this year alone. I've traveled to the States a few times also, into Canada, and I was able to write a book. I was able to coach people right now full-time, right? I helped hundreds of guys really quit for good. I've been able to be able model a leader for a lot of people. And I was essentially just realizing, right, today that you don't have to believe this message that being a virgin means you're a loser, that you don't have any form of value, right, if that makes sense. Look, I do understand how it feels, right, when you're the only one that is not like that But for me, for example, I'll tell you my story, right? After being with these guys, obviously when I was in school and everything, I decided to make a huge change. I decided to completely let go, completely detach from my old environment, right? From these people that would bring this, you know, first, I mean, this idea that I didn't want to fit in with this party culture. I never ever did that. right, of drinking alcohol, of sleeping with other women, of just doing the same thing over and over again, and then going to a shitty job. I didn't want to do that, right? I really wanted to run away as far as possible from that, right? That's immoral to even partake in any of those things. So I literally cut off all of my friends, right? And for 2 years, I had zero friends, literally zero, not even a single one, right? You might think I'm exaggerating, it's actually the truth. But it was also the darkest period of my life where I was alone doing my same routine every single day in my parents' house, just working on, you know, trying to make YouTube videos and reading books. And I didn't even have a job. And then I did get a job and the job made me more depressed because I was with negative people that would only talk about, again, casual sex and things of that nature. Degeneracy, essentially, right? But I never gave up, right? And thankfully, I also found God, you know, about a few years down the line. And whilst everyone was distracted, and this, I hope this doesn't come off as bragging in any shape or form, right? Essentially me saying that I'm a virgin back to, I mean, just a few years ago would have been like me saying that I was a failure. And it's crazy, but when I hang out with, for example, people of faith, right? I know that they value virginity for both men and women, right? So it's just a crazy switch. But essentially, whilst everyone was distracted, this was my thing, right? For a few years, I was like, 'Look, people can be distracted with those things. I don't even want to do those things anyways, right? Partying, alcohol, sleeping around, smoking, whatever, right? Watching porn, right?' They would brag about it, right? And they would have fun doing it. And of course, they have free will. They can do whatever they want. It's immoral, it's immoral, but that's what they want to do, right? And so Whilst they were doing that, essentially, and again, I don't want to make this sound like I'm just prideful and boasting, right? My intention is actually to show you how, you know, not sleeping around and not doing all of those things is actually way better for you objectively, like if you follow an objective source of morality, God, right? But also just logic, okay? Whilst they were essentially doing all of these immoral things, I was just working on myself, getting closer to God, and just being consistent with everything I was doing. Now, of course, I don't want to take, you know, my achievements and just say, oh, this is just because I work hard, whatever. No, I believe that God essentially really helped me achieve all of those things because God essentially is at the center of everything. But just realize that you don't need to follow the crowd. You don't need to follow what society says, right? That's what I've done for the past few years. I've said, you know what, if society says to do this and this and it goes against my morals, my values, then I'll just go and do the opposite. Obviously opposite meaning like not doing it, if that makes sense. So I just went on, and I still remember, for example, when I first found out about this thing called NoFap, I was being told that I was weird. They were like, why are you not watching porn? That's weird. How's that even possible? Whatever. And so I just worked on myself, you know, endlessly for the past few years. Even though, you know, of course, for example, being married is something important. I'm still relatively young and this is something which I plan on doing soon. But the problem we have nowadays is people live in an endless cycle of degeneracy, of trying to look good for someone else, for their social media, for their friend group and say, oh, you know what? I've been able to sleep with that woman. Oh, you know what? I can attract these women. Oh, you know what? I can talk to these women. Oh, you know what? I can date these women. And we only focus on that to put our value, right? To say, you know what? This is what I can do, right? The same way someone that builds a business is like, well, yeah, I built a business to $1 million, right? It's like something to brag about. And people nowadays, they wanna brag about this. About women, about, oh yeah, I was able to have intercourse in this specific situation with these specific people. And I see it till this day, right? And what's crazy is people then, and I see it with my own two eyes, people end up regretting the decision, not just in a sense of like, oh, they committed a sin, because most people that do this, like, usually are not men of faith, right? Except if they repent. But they end up regretting, as I see, right? And I see the same people that used to be with same exact age, same exact background, but that went into this path of degeneracy, of, oh, I lost my virginity, let me tell this other guy that slept with this woman. And me and other people that basically said, you know what, I don't need to go and sleep with someone in order to prove that I'm not a virgin, in order to prove that I am a man. And that's the thing, you can be cool, you can be masculine, you can be confident, you can be all of those things while still being a virgin. You gotta understand that if you're still a virgin, obviously maybe you need to work on your confidence. Maybe you need to work on your social skills. Maybe you need to work on your fitness, right? Maybe you don't look attractive, right? And look, maybe you need to work on those things so that when you want to be married, it's going to be easier for you. But don't make lust, don't make your sexual activity or your sexual capabilities something important to you, right? There's so many other things in your life that if you were to tackle, okay, if you were to tackle, for example, if you were to have purpose, if you were, for example, to maybe talk about that to other people, right, really share God with other people, for example, if you were to create a certain mission, a certain project that you want to, you know, put out in this world that gives you meaning, purpose. Maybe it's helping your family, maybe doing anything, right? That in and of itself is way more valuable in the eyes of other people than being able to sleep with someone else, if what you're trying to do is to impress other people, right? Which is not something which you should strive for anyways. But understand this, you don't need to lose your virginity in order to finally be a man, right? That's just— we just live in an oversexualized, you know, society. It's crazy nowadays. I don't even— I don't listen to music, right? And when I'm in a car and I hear rap songs talking about how they're having sex with this specific woman, and you're listening to this music with like someone from your family, a woman from your family, and they're talking and they're saying those things, to me it doesn't make sense, right? You see, we just normalize lust. We just think it's no big deal to just go and sleep around with women. It's actually something good, right? I remember like, I think it was a year ago when I was, obviously I've been recording videos like these for a long time, there was someone that said to someone else that then said to me that, oh, this guy Samir Gardner Gardner, he creates videos on quitting porn, but he probably can't get any woman. Like, if I can get women or not, you know, I don't care. That's not my morals, my values. I've been working on my fitness. I'm in the best shape of my life. Business, right? I've been in the best, you know, I've been literally traveling the world. I've been able to help so many people on my mission, right? I've been coaching more and more people. I've been really reaching more people and been able to be able model and leader, been writing a book that already helps some people. And doing all of those things, to me is way more cool if you want to follow what's cool than just being a virgin, right? I mean, than just, you know, being able to sleep with women. So please, if you are a man of faith, right? If you, for example, also run a business, focus on those things. Don't focus on, I need to be able— because I still remember, for example, I was coaching this one guy that was a man of faith then, and obviously didn't want to partake in intercourse before marriage. He didn't want to have sex before marriage. And he would try to though have the attention from women. He would try to, for example, be the type of guy that doesn't sleep around with women but could sleep around with that woman, if that makes sense. right? And I can relate to that because for a long time, that was also something which I was like, I had the desire, right? Like just like any other man essentially though, right? Where it's like you wanna prove to yourself that you can sleep with women but not sleep with them, right? Just so that you can feel confident and feel worthy. But essentially what I want you to realize, my brother, is You don't need that. You think you do. You've been told that it's very important. You've been told that in order to do all of these other things in life, you need to, you know, be able to sleep with women, to really do all of those things with women. But why not just then pursue marriage, right? Why does it have to be about sex? What does it have to be about lust? And you can feel more masculine, you can be more strong, you can feel more confident, more worthy, more all of those things, and yet not partake in that intercourse. Okay, so I hope you can really use this message to your advantage and don't fall for whatever society tells you.