In this monologue, the speaker uses the 2004 Indonesian tsunami as a powerful analogy to illustrate human resilience and challenge the victim‑mentalities common in first‑world societies. He recounts how survivors, despite massive loss of life, infrastructure, and trauma, rebuilt their communities, saw PTSD rates drop dramatically, and eventually experienced post‑traumatic growth (PTG), interpreting the disaster as a purpose‑giving event. The speaker argues that the same capacity for recovery exists in individuals struggling with pornography, masturbation, and other addictions (PMO). He critiques cultural narratives that label such struggles as signs of weak will, and instead promotes an "ownership" mindset: taking decisive, effortless action rather than waiting for a mindset shift. He emphasizes that people in comfortable living conditions can quit PMO with minimal effort if they choose to act. The talk concludes with a call to join his paid community and coaching program for further guidance, and mentions a forthcoming book draft that expands on these ideas.
Chapters
Yesterday I did a group coaching call in my community, and I explained a very, very important concept, and I gave a few examples which I'm about to talk right here in this video, which is going to really change your perspective drastically, not only when it comes to quitting porn and masturbation and anything in that regards, but also how you really perceive life in that sense. right? So that you can see life through a different lens. So then you can have your mental, your mind, using your cognitive abilities, your cognitive functions to your advantage rather than to your disadvantage. Okay, I want to first off talk about the concept, or more so the story, of the tsunami that happened in 2004, which was one of the biggest natural disasters in recorded history. It mainly hit the country of Indonesia. And so in 2004, the tsunami happened and it killed over 200,000 people. I think in Indonesia alone, there were over 500,000 people displaced. Now just imagine that was to happen in the Western world, right? In America or in Europe, we would just be all over the place. But how did these people react will really just show us how us as humans can move on from literally anything, anything, okay? So let me explain. I was writing my book yesterday, just writing the second draft, and basically I explained how that tsunami happened happened. And based on research, there were over 200,000 deaths, and many were left with PTSD, anxiety, depression, things of that nature, especially the, the children and those that lost some family members, right? Because think about it, it happened in this region called Aceh, and Aceh basically is like in the northwest of Indonesia and right next to Malaysia. And it completely destroyed like a lot. Imagine you have like a whole city and like all of the buildings are destroyed. There's pretty much nothing left. Obviously they sent out a lot of help to help than Indonesians. But what's surprising is, for example, they sent psychologists, and psychologists were there to just help them like mentally recover. But because there was like this stigma, because they didn't really see the purpose of having a psychologist, and instead they chose to just rely on praying and just overall relying on God, they just believed that having a psychologist was unnecessary, right? They just didn't see how it would even help them in the first place. But what I found like really striking, as I write here in my book, is that how quickly survivors Survivors found ways to move forward despite the devastation. People started rebuilding homes, fishing, farming, trading again within weeks to months. 2 years after that disaster happened, they found that PTSD prevalence— they did like a large study in that region. They said that in 2005, the PTSD rates were at 30% and they dropped to 14% in 2007, 2 years later. And at that time, they had also returned back to school as they rebuilt schools, homes, businesses, and they were starting to get back into their normal routine just 2 years later. I imagine the buildings are destroyed. They didn't just like lose their family members, they lost the infrastructures too. 5 years later, there were mental health studies that showed that even though there was a minority that still struggled with grief, anxiety, trauma, the majority of people no longer met the criteria for PTSD. They rebuilt their businesses, they remarried again, and they were raising children again. And what is even more fascinating is that they interpreted interpreted such horrible event as a new purpose. After the tsunami, they interpreted such event as that was done because of God's will. And so they saw this as an opportunity to get closer to God, to have stronger family ties, and have involvement in community life. And then 10 years later, okay, the researchers noted that the trauma did not necessarily turn into PTSD anymore, but to PTG, which is post-traumatic growth, the complete opposite of PTSD. And so such events like helps us realize that us living in First World nations, we often give up when we feel just a bit overwhelmed, right? We think our mental will not be able to take it on. We think that our mental health is being attacked or that we're getting weaker. We even have a legal system that promotes this victim mentality where if you act a certain way and you have a quote-unquote valid excuse because let's say you're too depressed or you have some form of trauma, which is probably nothing compared to what these people experience, we then get told, you know what, you rest. You can just, you know, sit on the sideline. And they essentially treat us as if we were made out of glass. So what happens is whenever we just face 1% or even 0.1% of what these people experienced in that tsunami, we get to just cope out of life and say, life is so hard, this is too much of a struggle. And then we see these people that are also human beings just like us that didn't get brought up in a victim mentality culture or didn't get told, oh no, you might have mental health problems if you face difficulties in life, or you might struggle deal with things that might overpower you, like trauma, and nowadays it's addiction. And then when we link everything back to PMO, we realize, look, we as humans can do so much more. If we were to compare the struggle that we have with PMO compared to what these guys experienced— and it's still something that happens to this day, right? Not just in 2004, people still struggle to that extent. People still go through harsh and harsh conditions, yet we only experience 0.001% of what they experience, and we give up and we say, No, but PMO is going to overpower me. And so I'm here to challenge this notion that you're weak-willed, that no, you can't say no to PMO. You can't quit PMO, then adapt to a life without PMO. All of this is just you believing in this narrative that was pushed around by, yes, the recovery ideology, the mainstream media, but you don't have to believe in that anymore. You can start taking what we call ownership, and that's only going to be used to your advantage. You probably live in somewhat very good living conditions, and so that means you can not only remove those vices from your life pretty easily and effortlessly. And it's not me saying that you're not struggling. It's just me saying that you can quit these and it doesn't have to be effortful. It can be, as the book says, effortless, but just don't make yourself weaker. I always tell people the same way you probably won't ever take drugs, or at least for the majority of people I talk to, is the same way you can say no to PMO. You can put PMO in that section of hard no and just completely leave it behind. Sometimes you don't need to wait for the next mindset shift. You You don't need to constantly try to change your perspective on something in order to quit something, because sometimes the best mindset shift and the best change of perceptions is going to occur the moment you choose to really execute and take action. And that is simply moving on in your life and pursuing whatever you wanted to pursue, pursuing that vision, that dream life. It can really just be that simple and effortless. If you want to learn more, go in the first link in my description. We have a community that you can join right now and get coached by me one-on-one as well as in group settings. And you and get more videos just like these that will tackle specific topics that I don't necessarily cover on YouTube. So I'll see you there.
