Escaping the shackles of religion and ditching the check list

And you're sitting there in the thing, and you open the door, and I look at you, and I was. I remember having my. I had to keep my shit together. Cause I. My breath was my. Like, my breath was taken away from me because you're this tiny, little, cute. You're wearing these, like, low, low ride sweats. Hips are barely hanging out, the thong on the back is popping. You got this tiny T shirt on. You've got this little cool, cute, little. I'm getting. I'm getting a little blood flow just talking about it right now. I'm not lying to.

Yeah.

Welcome to this week's date you wiped podcast. Here's the Frank truth. You ready? We went downstairs, changed our clothes, and came back and did episode number two. But that's just for the reels. And we're not going to put this part in the real, so it doesn't matter. But as a listener, just know we are on fire from our last show that we talked about with open relationships and all kinds of weird conversations around sex and the fact that you won't have a real conversation with your spouse. But today we're not going to talk about that because same day, we're moved to a new show.

Yeah. And, you know, it's funny is we both went. We were both wearing all black, and we went and changed, and we both put on the same outfit. We put on a white shirt and blue jeans and sneakers and high tops. I was like, why? Why you got to copy my outfit?

When did you know I was.

We do that a lot.

When did you know I was the one?

When we showed up. Okay, so tell them when you knew.

I was the one. Of all the moments.

We met in college when I was 18. Yep.

You robbed the cradle young.

And he asked me out to a football game, and my family's like, big University of Utah people, and you were going to byu. So I was like, I want to wear my red sweater to a BYU game. That seems appropriate. And weirdly enough, you showed up in, like, the same outfit. Yeah, I was like, what guy wears a red turtleneck to a BYU game?

Like, I don't know. I was trying to show my style. I remember that turtleneck to this day.

I literally, like, answered the door, and I was like, well, this is awkward because we're wearing the same thing. But you know what? We do that a lot. Like, we'll be going on date night, and I'll be like, like, you're wearing your green blazer. I'm wearing my green dress. Like, people think we coordinate.

And I'm like, we're just in the vibration.

We're in the same pocket. Yeah.

So listen, I. I don't think many people know I graduated from Brigham Young University.

You look at you.

Did.

Did you ever get the paper?

No, no, because I didn't pay the fine. See, I never walked.

You never actually got the paper?

I never got the piece of paper. So maybe technically I've never actually graduated. Maybe you have to pay the fee.

Your records, they're like that. Garrett's a liar. He's not a coach. He's not.

I went to Rick's College. I went to Boise State University. And then after my divorce, I finished my degree at Brigham Young University. And I didn't care. I gotten divorced and I moved into my parents, into their basement for a few months in northern Utah in a place called Brigham City. That's our sink going crazy right now in the background.

There we go.

Decided to drain itself. So I had a. I. I went and showed up my parents house and lived there for a few months. And my mom wanted me to go to BYU because she wanted me to find a good Mormon.

Didn't your mom. That's fun. Did your mom call and get you into byu? Like, didn't you apply and you didn't get in? Your mom was like, oh, hell no.

I applied, got rejected. And then I applied again, or rejected. And I was like, that's not in the cards. I'm gonna go to the University of Utah or I'm gonna go to Utah State and play football. And like, I had, like I had one more year of eligibility. Cause I hadn't played pro yet. I ended up playing arena ball like the next year, and then my eligibility's over. But anyways, my mom was like hell bent on me going to byu, which was great. Cause I met you down there. You weren't at byu, but you were down there.

I tried to get into the U and I didn't get accepted.

Really?

No. So that was also my second. That was my second choice. I went to uvu.

If you had gone to the University of Utah, I'd never met you.

I know I got rejected, but think.

About this for a second. Had my mom not fought for me to go to byu, I would have never end up in Utah County. Had my cousin and his friends not lived in Orem at the Pinnacle Apartments, I would have never.

See, that's what I'm convinced that.

Had you been accepted by the University of Utah. Had I been rejected by BYU and ended up at Utah State or somewhere different, moved out, Arizona, State, somewhere else? Had any of the. Had anything the day we went. Had you decided not to go to the church conference so many Sunday that.

We could have not ever met?

Had I not yelled out at a group of girls?

I think we maybe would have met at another time though, because we lived in the same apartment complex.

I don't know.

I don't know. I mean, I feel like I knew all the guy groups that lived. I feel like eventually we might have met because we literally in the same complex.

That's true.

But I do, I am convinced. Like the, the like, if some like say, for example, like your, your son, he breaks up from a relationship in his girlfriend, I'm like, you'll never get back into a relationship because you're not in a space where you're completely letting her go. Do you know what I mean? So I'm convinced that life and meeting people is based on timing. It's like, are you just getting over. Is it a rebound? Is it. You're. It's not a rebound. Is it like we kind of are. Our paths collided when our vibration was the same and that's how we were able to connect. I remember it's so funny because both of us were. This is a funny story, but I moved to UVU and I was like, the guys out here are so nerdy. Like I had just gone off a bender of partying all summer and like dating a really not so great guy. And so I remember feeling like. And which is weird cause I didn't party at all through high school. I was actually a pretty good kid. And then I graduated and was like, ah, like went off the rails for a minute. But I remember moving to Orem and I remember thinking like, all the guys were so weird. So when I met you, like, you seemed a little bit wild. Like you were kind of. You were coming out of a party phase. You had your tribal tattoo. Like you had spiky bleached out hair. And so I was attracted to you kind of because you seem like this wild guy in the midst of a bunch of like returned Mormon missionaries. You were the wild one. I was like, okay. And I was. I think I was attracted to that kind of bad boy, wild version of you. And I still think there's a piece of me that is still attracted to you. And you're. The funny thing is like, even when I got to know you, I was like, oh, this guy's like a kind of a teddy bear. Like he's actually like really like pretty like, down to earth. And like, we just. We. Do you remember? We connected. Like, we were both, like, kind of in the same spot in life. Even though I was 18 and you were 25, like, I felt like our energy was very in sync.

Yeah. We were basically the same age. I was still trying to figure myself out. I just remember you. I remember the very first time I saw you was when we came to your apartment. We'd gotten your number to your apartment from your roommates, but you were hiding in the band of your roommates. I couldn't see you. I just saw Shelly and Courtney, and I didn't see you. You were so. Her two friends were loud and wild.

I was. Guys, get in the car. Hurry.

Like me. And they were just wild and loud and so, like, I met them and got their number, and they gave me your apartment. And then we went over, my cousin and I, to see you the next. To see Shelly and Courtney, because we didn't even know you existed. Do you know that? I know I didn't even know you existed. I didn't even see you.

I prefer to keep it that way.

But you had seen me. And then we showed up, and you answered the door, and you were the only one there, because at that time, everybody always was dancing and nobody's ever home. And you're sitting there in the thing, and you open the door and I look at you, and I was. I remember having my. I had to keep my shit together because I. My breath was My. Like, my breath was taken away from me because you're this tiny little, cute. You're wearing these, like, low ride sweats. The hips are barely hanging out, the thong on the back is popping. You got this tiny T shirt on. You've got this little cool, cute little. I'm getting a little blood flow just talking about it right now. I'm not lying to you. Your hair's, like, kind of bob cut like that. You had the shorts and you got the fucking eyes. And the eyes, just this little, tiny Bambi with these, like, I am the universe's soul. Come to me, like, sucked me down.

Don't look directly in my eyes. I'll get you.

You did. And I was like. And I remember my cousin had called dibs on you.

You can't do that.

I know, back in the day. Dibs. But I didn't know he said this because I just called. I remember one of your other friends, because I didn't even know you.

No offense to your cousin, but I was like, this guy's, like, in his 20s and he's going bald. I couldn't do it.

He was a nice guy. We, you know. You know, I haven't talked to him since Gilbert, Arizona, because he was talking so much on my social media.

Oh, yeah, it's like when you started.

Yeah, when I left the Mormon church.

That's when people feel really uncomfortable. That's what they do. They start to talk because you're questioning the box that they're in. They don't like that. They don't like that you don't like their box that they're in anymore.

He's, he's a good guy. I should call him.

But.

No, but, like, it just literally been like 15 years.

Yeah, it doesn't matter.

So anyways, I see you and I just like, I am completely head over heels for you. Like, I'm like, you are so hot and so like, you had this whole element. We didn't. People don't even know this. We didn't have sex, we didn't kiss, we didn't nothing for two months.

We connected.

We just connect, literally. We didn't have any physical sexual inter exchange.

No. We kissed on like the third date.

No, we did not.

Yes, we did.

Two months.

No, it was like three weeks tops. I remember, I was like, this guy has not tried to kiss me.

I was not physically touching you that way. I was like, I'm not. No ass, no vagina, no tits, no making out, no nothing. I was like, I want this one to last.

I think that's a good.

That's what I wanted. Every other relationship I'd been in, we hook up quick, things go down.

That's probably a good strategy over.

And I was like, I, I love this one. I don't want to this up.

That should be a good strategy that you give your divorce. Guys, you're like, hey, when you're at that point where you're ready to find the one, don't, don't sleep with her right out of the gate. Like, maybe see if there's other connection besides good sex.

Do you know what be. Do you know what couples like, older couples now, guys like that are dating and single girls I know that are dating or divorced, they think that it's like, you know, they've been really, you know, they're really holding their moral ground if they didn't fuck until date three.

Oh, yeah, that's.

But I can see how that happens when you're older because you just, I think that your fucks to give kind of go down kind of like an old grandma Is just like, I don't give a fuck.

Well, you're just in a situation. Like, I mean, I was. Talked to some of my single friends, and I'm like, it's just like, when you're, like, older, you're like, there's chemistry. We had a good time. We had a good dinner. We both want to have sex. Why not? Like, so it's not. Yeah, it's not. But. But those are not. They're not looking at this person like, this is my soulmate.

Yeah.

I mean, it could turn into that.

But just a physical thing. Let's have some fun.

Yeah. They're like, hey, you're attractive. I'm attractive. The problem that I would. That I. My few single friends that I have, the problem is they end up sleeping with this guy, both in the moment, and then she wants a relationship, and he's like, whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm dating, like, five other girls. You were just literally, like, I just couldn't believe it took me three days to get you in bed kind of thing. Like. And so then it's like, I feel bad for my friends. I'm like, oh, yeah, he doesn't actually. He just want to sleep with you.

Do you know that went the other way? I hooked up some of the guys I know with girls thinking I was hooking them up with a sweetheart.

Wait, what?

Thinking I was hooking them up with sweethearts? No. These women were just as aggressive sexually and wanting money and just time and take me on trips and. Yeah. If you'll just take care of me.

Yeah.

It's wild, though. Like, I. I mean, I get it. We've not been single for 22 years, so this is like a.

But that's. Maybe that maybe that's fulfilling. Like somebody we know that we're very close to you. It's like, I have a hard time believing that you guys have sex on a regular basis or even good sex.

Like, they for sure don't.

I. But. So. But then I'm like, but I know you like being taken care of. And I'm not saying you're unhapp. You just have, like, both. This is your tolerance in your relationship. He wants a trophy wife, and she wants the money and the. The clout and whatever else, and that's the standard they put on themselves.

There's absolutely zero chemistry between them.

Well, I mean, yeah, but. But what I'm saying, I used to be like, how are you happy? And now I'm like, they're. Well, at some level, I'm sure they're happy. Why they wouldn't stay together. And neither of them are cheating that I.

She's gonna cheat.

What?

She's gonna.

I don't think she. I don't think she will.

She does.

No, I think she. I don't think she's.

She.

No, I know.

I don't think she knows. She's gonna cheat. No, she was gonna cheat. She's not even gonna know it. She's gonna cheat.

No, I don't think she will. She would. I don't think she'd even put herself in that situation.

I think she will.

I think she has too much guilt.

I think she's.

I tried to get her to take a shot one time and she like, touched her lips and she was like, oh. And she threw the shot at me and I was like, what the hell?

I believe this.

Like, and it wasn't about the shot. It was the guilt that she would feel for taking the shot. Like, I don't. I don't think it's gonna happen.

Listen, there's a whole bunch of people from our culture. The Mormon culture is a culture to come from because we have a lot. So now that we're going back into. Well, I'm going back into. I don't know where you're at. I am going back into Christianity, but in a different. It's just a different way.

It's not working anymore.

Like, but like, but what I'm noticing that is so wild. And it's an interesting perspective had because I was so devout Mormon for so long. I wasn't like kind of Mormon.

You have like a little bit of that self righteous chip.

I for sure do have a bit of that self righteous chip. And I was like, like, I was so committed to this is the way. Like, I wasn't kind of like, I was temple five days a week, Mormon style. I went on a Mormon mission. I taught Mormon missionaries. I'd worked in the Mormon Temple. I was at church every single week. I read all the scriptures. I read the Bible, I read the Book of Mormon. I did all these things. I was like in to win.

When did you question? Because people.

When we lost all our money, people.

Ask me all the time.

And then our marriage started falling apart and I was like, what the. Nothing I've done has worked.

Yeah.

I've done everything right for so long and this is the fruit that I get. So I just started asking questions.

Yeah. I was gonna say it's more about finding your path. Right. It's not to say, like, I don't even like There's a lot of people that are Mormon. Some of our friends that you're like, hey, that path seems to be working out great for you.

That I have Mormon friends of mine and they're like, what do you think I should do? I said, you should stay Mormon. You're happy. Look at you.

Yeah. If you love it, if it's working for you, then do you.

Don't leave. Yeah, like, well, I don't know if I should leave, Coach. I was like, I'm not telling you to leave.

Yeah, yeah, exactly.

Do you enjoy it? Yes. Do you believe it? Yes. Does it work for you? Yes. Do you love it? Yeah. Then stay.

See, for me, like, when I started, the more I started to question stuff, I'm like, that doesn't make sense. I was just falling in line because I was told to. I was raised in the culture where that's what you did. And the minute I started to question stuff, I was like, oh, yeah, that doesn't make sense to me. It doesn't resonate to me. And when I got that, like, kind of clear voice saying, like, this is not your path and you'll help more people if you figure out your path. And I was like, whoa. It was like one of those moments. I was like, okay, right. So I believe in this, in this world, that our goal is impact.

Yeah, it is.

It's reach and it's impact. And so you have to find your path and your calling that's going to give you the most impact and the most reach. Not because that's your culture, that's how you were raised, or that's what you're supposed to do, or hitting the checkbox. You're not going to have, you're not going to have any reach. If you do that, you're just going to be self fulfilled for yourself. And I think that we're all meant to impact everybody. And so it's like finding that path to where you can become this, this version of you that's going to impact on others.

Human beings have a hard time. Me too. I'm a human being.

Everybody's human.

But we have a hard time with like, letting go and this. The craziest part is like, so, like going into non denominational Christianity. Ocean's Church pastor Mark Francie, I meet with him every week. We meet again tomorrow. Been going to church every week, studying the Bible every day. Feeling, interestingly enough, a relationship with Christ that I never felt as a Mormon. I feel like when I look back, I feel like what I had was a relationship With a blueprint, which is wow, that. I'm not saying that's the case for all Mormons. I'm saying that was the case for me. I was raised in a way that I had a checklist to heaven and hit the fucking checklist, be a doer, smash a checklist, live forever in eternity with God. And raised also with the frame, which is an interesting frame about being Mormon, is you're kind of raised with, we have the truth, the only truth. And the fact of this, we have the truth and we're blessed because we are born into the truth. Which means we're better than you.

Yeah.

Which is kind of like American sometimes. We're like, I'm American and I'm better than you. And I look at them, I'm like, you're 120 pounds overweight, live in a fucking trailer and have done nothing with your life your entire life. Just because you have a passport that stamps United States, American citizen does not mean you are worth it. You do not represent me. That was happening during Black Lives Matter. People like, oh yeah, check these people out. I was like, bro, you think those are my people just because they're white?

Yeah, yeah.

And then I would send them like videos from like black people being crazy. I was like, oh, are these your people? And they're like, just because those are black people, do you think they're not my people? I was like, exactly. Stop sending me stupid white trash trailer park white people. I was like, I'll just keep sending you hood black dudes. Like, what are you talking about? It's like you're represent. Like we're different. Well, same thing inside. Like Mormonism. It was weird. Like I just had this place where I was like, I felt like I needed to leave. And then when I left, now I'm going into this other path, which is very interesting for me too. And it's. I'm noticing that 85% of the patterns in non denominational church are very similar. It's just like Mormons and Catholics and Jehovah's Witnesses and born again Christians. They don't see it though. They don't even know because they've never. That's what's different is I was hardcore religion come over here to listen to people talk to me about how against religion they are. Yet 85% of the shit they do is as religiously zealous as Mormons are.

Right.

Or Jehovah's Witness or Seventh Day Adventist or Muslims that are very devout or orthodox Jews. It's just like still, it's like. But they think they're not.

I think you don't see it. And I think that it's just. It's easier to like, say, feel less guilty if you feel like you're hitting the checklist. Even if you're like, it doesn't resonate with you. You're like, well, I'll be saved by grace, because I did. But that's not the intention of being on this, on this world. Like, it's. It's not. And I think, sadly, very few people will not figure it out.

I think it's like the thing for me recently, it's a very. I don't know, I'm really enjoying it. I'm enjoying it. I'm enjoying this stage. I could have never imagined be baptizing people in the ocean in front of our house. I didn't plan on that. Garrett the Baptist, John the Baptist guys are saying, like, garrett the Baptist. I was like, you got me, bro. I didn't expect that to happen. Had no idea that would happen. I'm enjoying though, like, I feel like, good about it. I feel like, I feel like a deep strength and a deep unity with Christ. And I feel like. But like, as a real thing.

Well, some people just get baptized to get baptized. Because they're like, I'm. I'm like, that's how it was in the Mormon Church. You're baptized at 8. Like, that doesn't really mean a lot to an 8 year old. Even people inside of Ocean Church, it's like, they sign up to get baptized. I'm like, do you know why you're being baptized? Or you just kind of like, think it's a fun culture and you're like, yeah, I'm ready to be saved or whatever. Like, it's so. It's interesting because you could get baptized and not even know why you're doing it. And then you could get baptized and have this like, sense of freedom. Of like, of just sense of freedom.

Sunday.

What?

Sunday we're at church and I come to kiss your hand and you think I'm trying to raise your hand except Jesus, oh my gosh.

I was like, why? I'm like, I got it.

You got angry at me. You, like, were like, what are you doing? And I was like, I'm just gonna kiss your hand.

You did it so weirdly. Like, he's like, asking people to raise their hand to accept Christ. And like, you, you grab my hand. Like, what a weird time to randomly kiss my hand. Like, how often do you kiss my Hand.

I don't know. I was just feeling like. I was feeling the moment.

I was like, is he gonna raise my hand?

No, I was feeling. I can see how. Well, after I thought about. I was like, I can see how she literally, you've.

I don't remember one time you've ever kissed my hand. Ever.

No, I haven't done it much.

No. So there was something. I was like, what is he doing?

I was definitely feeling it.

So I don't know.

Where are you at?

I feel like I do have a very good relationship with God. I believe that you. I can be in prayer at all times. Like, I really am very. I think of myself as very connected. That doesn't mean I'm not human. Like, I still follow in the same guilt traps, the depression, the anxiety, the everything. I'm still human. But I also think that people get so sucked into these traps that they don't allow themselves to feel God, Christ, whatever you want to call it. They don't. They block this connection that they've always had and can tap into it anytime they want to.

Yeah.

And so it's like, oh, you need to pray. I'm like, what? Who's to say I'm not in prayer all the time? You don't know me. So I feel like I have a. I feel like I. Maybe because I was raised Mormon, but I wasn't as into the, like the scriptures and the doctrine as you. So it was easy for me to. Not easy, but it was easier for me to question. Right. I hadn't gone down this path of like saying this is the how it is and this is the only way I am. I'm a very open minded person. I always have been. So for me, it's. It's interesting because I enjoy it. I, I like, I think Pastor Mark is really good at what he does. He's a phenomenal speaker. He is definitely tapped in. I love watching speakers that can channel and tap in because it's not even. What about what they say, it's literally like an energy that feels the whole congregation. So I really like that aspect. You do that as well. I see you get in. It's kind of like this pastoral state where it's. You're just channeling and it's a vibration that people hear, whether it's through a feeling or words. But they. You have this ability to. God literally is speaking through you. And I believe that everybody has that ability that we are a tool for God to utilize, whether we choose to accept that or not. It's Kind of like, hey, God, I'm yours. What do you want me to do today? Who do you want me to impact? I thought it was interesting at church how he goes, you know, he's like, if. If my car breaks down, he's like, hey, God, your car broke down. Because I tell people all the time, I go, garrett and I, this house that we got, I'm like, it was a gift from God. I was like, there, where we were at financially when we got this house, we were doing good. But together, the way this fell on our laps, I was like, this was ridiculous. I was like, this is not my.

It was a divine domino.

I'm like, this is not. It's not like we came and dropped, you know, 20 million cash. We don't have that kind of cash. So you tell me how like, that lines up and then say you don't believe. So I feel like if you live in this lane where you can let God channel through you, he will reward you. He will. Things start. Things start clicking when you actually tune into what you're supposed to be doing.

Think that was really good.

Thanks.

I think it's interesting. People, like, don't know what to do, even inside that. Because, like, I would say that I. I mean, people for. For the first time, I'm like, people like, are you Christian? I'm like, yes. And they're like, okay, well, what does that mean? I was like, well, it means that I believe. I don't believe. I know Christ is who Christ said he was. Zero hesitation in that. I also know that there is a new relationship. I'm looking forward with Christ as Lord, which is new for me, which is what Pastor Mark's working on with me. And then a bunch of my friends, I'm going out to this conference called the Sacred Church Conference. And I meet with a whole bunch of different really smart pastors who are very, very good at what they do. And I challenge everybody. Like, I just reverse a frame on everyone. And it really. With the pastors I work with, in a good way.

Yeah.

But all because it forces it. I'm not going to fall in line with their answers because I'm not some rookie. And people were like, oh, you're new to the faith. I'm like, okay. That's like saying that a guy who is a five time NCAA champion wrestler who then went on to win three Olympic gold medals in wrestling and judo started jiu jitsu. And they're like, always new to jiu jitsu. You're like, bro, this guy will eat your Face off with the basics of Jiu jitsu. Because he's already a savage at wrestling. Well, that was me with God. I was already a savage with God. I was just new to this idea of Christ in the frame that I was in, where Christ was preeminent, not Joseph Smith, not a blueprint, not a restored church, that Christ was the focus. And so I'm this, like, savage elite. Four time NCAA champion, three time gold medalist. And now I'm entering into this conversation people like, oh, you're new to Jiu jitsu. I was like, I am, but I'm gonna fucking murder your face right now. Watch this. And I'm not saying.

Probably catches him off guard.

It does, because, like, these people will quote shit to me. And I'm sitting there, I'm like, yeah, but do you read the rest of the verse that you just read to me? Look at it from here. And they're like. And I was like, my favorite is when I sat with a bunch of guys that run a megachurch. I was. Met him. And I was out in. I was in Florida, and they were at a hotel and they were there for a conference. And they sent something in me, I guess, and asked me to come sit with them. So I did. And I was sitting down with them. A couple were planting a couple more football players used to play at Auburn that were planting a church in Atlanta, Georgia. And we were talking, they were quoting Psalms. And then I said something interesting. I said, you know what's interesting to me about Psalms? And I like. I said, here is a book written by a guy who's a king who murdered a dude to fuck a girl. In the beginning, he was a hero. He killed Goliath. He became king. He was considered one of the greatest kings of all time. And then he just. He had. He had a thousand wives. He had 700 wives and 300 concubines.

When I hear that, I mean.

And he fucks the one girl he's not supposed to fuck. Bathsheba in the middle of the courtyard. And then. I love what you told me about that same story. You're like, we stopped giving this any, like, credit or a hall pass here. You know for sure she was out there hanging her ass out on purpose. Like the girl lifetime fitness with the leotard on. But. But they were sitting there looking at me, and I'm like. And they're the. The lead pastor with them is like, me. I mean, he's not wrong. It's not exactly how I would say it, but, you know, that's true. And so I'm bringing this new perspective in that I enjoy because I just won't accept the box.

Exactly. But a lot of times that's the thing is people, they're doing the checklist, they're studying their scriptures religiously. I'm not saying they're not smart and they have some valid points, but they've never actually considered a different path. So they come in and they give you these, like, these holier than thou scripture quotes. And I'm like, you're not smarter than me. Do not.

Well, they sound just like Mormons.

But, but that's what I'm saying. When somebody quotes a scripture at me, I'm like, you're not better than me. What is the point of sharing the scripture? Keep it to yourself. It's irrelevant to the conversation that I'm even in. So I, I get that people are so passionate about scriptures. But then, and, and I like when I watch Pastor Mark, I'm like, this guy knows the scriptures. He's super passionate about it. That's great. This is a tool that works real well for him. And I love that he's so passionate about it. When somebody's passionate about something and they share their passion about it, you, you, it's, it's, it's authentic. It really is something that works for them. Right? But then there's the checklist where it's like, well, I'm reading the scriptures and I'm doing all the things. And it's like, but are you happy? And is that working for you? And if it's not, then how can you create your own happiness? How can you create your path? How can you have reach? How can you have impact?

Listen, I am all about more than anything across the board. Amber's little girl came upstairs with Heather. Go play with Charlie or Isla. So I'm not against. The fun part is I'm getting to this place. I'm not against any of these churches at any level. Non denominational church, Seventh Day Adventists, Born again Christians, Evangelicals, Pentecostals, Southern Baptists, Catholics, Mormons, I don't care. At the core of all this is this truth, which is God. And at the core of all of this is Christ as savior. And everybody else is just fucking arguing. And I'm like, what if we lived in a place where you weren't measured by the scriptures you memorized or the church that you attended or the being right in your path and interpretation of scripture, but we only could measure you by one thing, by your fruit. And you had to be justified as a Christian, as a member of whatever church that you couldn't just take the label on. We actually could unbox your world. And we could take a look at the truth of your body, your addictions, your patterns, your behaviors, and what you look like butt ass naked in front of the mirror. And we could take your being, your relationship with God and your deep communion and truth and that lace, and we could take that into reality, check and measure it. And then we took your relationship with your spouse and we look at your sex, your intimacy, your communication. You had to put it publicly on display. We had to see what the truth was. And we looked at your kids and your conversations, connections, how much they lean into you, how much they trust you. And that was put on the table to be weighed and measured. And then we looked at your bank accounts, your ability to make money, keep money, grow money. And we looked at your game of business. And you had to be held accountable to that fruit. And instead of us holding people accountable to, I go to this church, I go to that church. I have the right way, I have the wrong way. I've spent my whole life masturbating over scripture. And we said, great, wipe it all to the side, strip your fucking clothes off and let's look at your fruit. Show me your fruit in your dominion across the four domains of life, body, being, balance, and business. And instead of measuring you by how smart you are, we measure you by results. We measure you by fruit because God was really clear. By their fruit, ye shall know them, not by the number of scriptures they memorized, not by the church that they went to, not the person they called prophet or their pastor, not by the number of Bible studies they attended, the number of church conferences they went to and how much worship music they listened to, nor how much tithing they paid by their fruit. And if you're currently living in a world in which your fruit sucks ass but you will memorize in scripture, I'd encourage you to take another look at it. Take a look at maybe a new way to do life. And this is what Danielle and I have been doing. It's what this podcast has been about. We've never been trying to pretend like we got all the answers. What we do have is a commitment to progress. I love this woman. I've loved her from the time I met her, the very first time we've been to heaven and held back 500,000 times, not that many times since we first met. And we're in a new season, new episode of life. We still are coordinating wearing the same damn clothes even when we don't try.

Here's what I'll say. We are committed to growing something that's outside of just being human. But we are human. So at that level you kind of have to allow yourself some grace and moments that we are figuring out. But we're, I feel like we're very conscious human beings and feel at some level called to shift the game a little bit. So that's why we're here and that's why we're, we're sharing just two crazy two crazies with five kids, a dog and 20 million dollar house on the.

Beach and inviting you to take on the same journey. Don't want you to get rid of your Bible. Hell, I don't even want you to get rid of your Book of Mormon. If you're a Mormon. You got your Book of Mormon. Keep it. Do your thing, man. But what I would encourage you to do is check us out. Wakeupwarrior.com Go learn more about the wakeup warrior tools Wake up warrior system, the gamification what we've built here. It may be exactly what you're needing, not as a takeaway from what you currently have or a replacement of, but an accelerator too. Look at it like a performance enhancing drug just happens to be for producing the drug of big results in your life across body being balanced in business. On top of that, we have a date your wife experience call that happens every single week with couples from all over the world that participate in this. Would love to give you free access to that for 30 days. Also give it a test run. See if it's a health benefit for you and your marriage. Check it all out. Head to wakeupware.com and that brings us to a conclusion here for this episode of date your wife. It's time for us to go to therapy.

Okay. Thanks for tuning in and share with your friends.

Listen.

What? What are you doing?

It's my Bible app. I will never walk alone. I have Jesus. That's what it just said to me. No, it's a good way to end it with a little song. We're done. We're out. Have a great week. We'll talk to you next week.

Wait.

Bye.