Stay in Your Lane | Date Your Wife | Ep 023

Communication. And hello, my friends. It's your boy Garrett Jay White, the founder of wake up Warrior and your co host here in the date your wife podcast. I'm here with the queen, my beautiful wife, who is my co host and the founder of DKW styling and creator of natural beaded bros. And also, well, our lead trainer in our most recent event that just finished. Big money stylist. Big money convention two.

Big money stylist.

350 artists, number two convention number 250 stylists. 350 stylists.

350. What are we doing?

All right, so here's my question for you, Loopy.

Like, it was such a long work week. We just.

It was. And then I. I roll straight into another, like, seven days of.

And then it's date night, and we're like, why would we not shoot a podcast for you guys?

Why would we not obviously shoot a podcast for you guys?

Yep.

So here's how it's gonna work. Tonight, you're gonna say something, and then I'm gonna repeat it in a dramatic fashion. So let's practice this.

We don't know if anything's actually gonna happen on this show.

Yeah, we don't know. Okay, so say something, and let me see if I can say it in a dramatic fashion. Say anything, but say something a little more random.

We are going to have sushi.

We are going to have sushi. All right. How'd you feel about that? Super dramatic.

No.

Okay. So welcome to the podcast. If you are here new at the date your wife podcast. Well, welcome again. I am Gary J. White, founder, wake up warrior, and also author of the book warrior book and be the man. The book. If you're here new to the show, this show itself is driven to teach the warrior's way as a couple, which is the habit of lifestyle across body being balanced in business. Specifically here in this show, we talk about parenting, we talk about sex, we talk about communication, we talk about money, and we do this in the context of a couple. Now, we actually had. Danielle, I had a comment about you from the most recent big money stylist convention.

That was weird. That was weird. I know what comment you're talking about. So we just. I'll just tell you guys.

All right, tell them a little bit about what happened.

Okay. So I created a hair extension system called natural beauty rose, and I own a salon called DKW styling, and we do a program for stylists teaching them the system of natural beauty rose, but we call it big money status. Anyways, we do a few of those events a year. It's one of our larger classes. There was over 350 stylists there. And it's three days and it's long days. It's like nine to nine. So it's 12 hour days. 12 hour days. And it's just like we're at the end of the three day, 12 hour days. And I'm just like, oh, it's fatiguing to be on stage and teaching and entertaining and running the room, but I'm not doing it alone. But still, it's a lot of energy. So that's what we just got done doing, and that's kind of. It was fun.

And there was a comment that came in from an associate of ours.

He's a newer one, about you.

He's not new to the north way, but he was sitting in the room and he sent me a message today, and he said, you know, Danielle is like a gremlin.

Thank you.

And it continued. He's like, cuddly, nice, sweet, fun. And then you pour a little water on it, and out comes the beast.

Oh, my God.

And he said, watching Danielle speak in truth, like, she. I've never seen her in the activated gremlin. If you're unfamiliar with the gremlin thing, Google it and look it up on YouTube. You'll see what happens is these cute little guys are like.

And they put water, like, I will eat your face off.

Yeah. Next thing you know, they're climbing out of toilets. So, like, let's talk about this, though, because you. You talked about one thing at convention, which was your alter ego.

Yes. Everybody wears many hats. Everybody has their character, which is very much them. And a true professional knows when to use each character.

All right, so if you are using a character, are you being inauthentic?

No, I. It's. I think it's totally you. When I was first trying to communicate a message and market in my own marketing, I first started on YouTube and I was actually teaching the girls this at our recent class.

Okay.

And I was like, okay, you guys, I know you, like, don't. We do hair. And we like to be behind the scenes, and we don't necessarily want to be in front of the scenes. I mean, most. A lot of artists are actually more introverted versus extroverted. And so anyways, that's just kind of how the nature is. And I was like, I. I'm a confident person, but I didn't really want to get on camera and be that person. And I remember I was Communicating to them. What I said is when I first started doing videos, I would re watch them and I felt like I'm a fun person. Like, like you are. People would meet me and they'd be like, oh, I thought you'd be quiet. And I am kind of reserved and observant. But then when I'm hanging out with people, I'm actually, I'm fairly social. So people are always surprised by that, that they're like, oh, you're a fun person. I'm like, yeah. And then so I started doing my first videos just on YouTube. And people always make the mistake of trying to. It's almost like not be them. They try to be too professional. So they'll get on video and they'll be like, I was like trying to promote a shampoo or something. I'm like, this shampoo is awesome. I love it. You should definitely buy it.

This shampoo is awesome. You should buy it.

Yes. I think I was so nervous and I just thought, oh my God, where's this video gonn? And so anyways, I was just telling everybody, like, you just have to be you if you screw up. But not only that, like, you have to almost be like a more animated version of you because it's interesting when you're talking into a camera, you have to envision another person on the other side of that camera because if you don't, you don't put out that energy. And I always tell people, I'm like, when you're speaking in front of a camera, act like you want to actually connect with people. And if you do that, you're just going to be your on camera version of you. So. So the other thing I would do too is I would try to be more smiley and I'd be more animated, which I feel like that's how I am in person. So it's not like it's not me, but it's like you have to learn how to turn it on a little bit. You know what I mean?

I do know what you mean.

I know what you mean.

When you started doing this, I actually thought you were being inauthentic. Yeah, but I didn't know. I didn't know. I'm saying that's what I originally thought. I'm saying is what I currently think. Inside of that though, I've realized that we as human beings have lots of characters. We can also label these characters as roles and we play different roles and each role has a character. Right. So if you look at this from an acting perspective, you know, an Actor that comes on may have a specific role and they may be an overweight guy who's a serial killer. And then they take on another movie role and they're super ripped, shredded Fight club guy. And then they take on another role and they're a middle aged manager at a large company and married and live in the suburbs. Like, actors take on these different characters inside of these roles, but inside of marriage, there are a lot of roles that we play. And so there are actually characters, characters required to be created and mastered inside of the relationship of being married. Would you agree with this?

Yeah. I always say you have like, you have many hats and you have to know when to like, put the work hat on. You have to know when to put the mom hat on. You have to know how to put the wife hat on. You have to know how to put the lover hat on. Like, you have to be able to wear all these hats and have these characters and be able to kind of go from one box to the next box or one hat to the next hat.

Yeah, it's like you go from, you know, business owner to lover to mom to lover to wife to lover, to just kind of love her pretty much every other time, right? No, you're not feeling that one.

I wasn't even paying attention. Then I realized I'm like, was he saying lover Every other one?

Okay, so we're going to take this idea of character zone. We're going to spin it off into the following idea, which is like, inside a relationship, everybody's got a lot of different roles and they've got a lot of different characters. But here's the crazy part. Life itself is about growth, which means individuals. And we face this. I had individuals come up to us at our graduation last night and said, listen, I was planning on getting divorced when I left this convention. I was going to go home and file divorce with my husband. And because of watching you and Danielle, I've decided not to file divorce with my husband. And I'm going to commit to the next year at least in working on our relationship and seeing if we can make it work. There's this issue that comes up in a relationship, particularly in being able to communicate, which is our topic today, which is communication, as the roles and the characters inside of an individual begin to change. Now we run programs where we empower people, and particularly artists and in my world, male business owners, how to find themselves in a deeper way and then how to apply that to getting paid more. So, Danielle, here's a question. What is like, what, what has been your experience with this. As you and I continue to grow and we grow at different speeds at different times, this changes our roles. But it also makes communication more difficult when one person's changing and the other one is not. Would you agree with this?

Right.

Okay.

If you're not at the same pace, you like, you almost like for us it was like, if you're not at the same pace, you kind of divide and then you're like, who are you? And you lose that connection, chemistry, attraction. Like you have to really kind of be able to grow at the same pace. And I think that's hard when you have two people that are both maybe working. But now that we kind of work together and have been able to grow together that way, it seems like our communication has gotten a lot better.

You were sharing that during the convention though. You were using example and you were talking about drifting. I can't remember exactly what it was you were speaking to. There was one of the women who asked about half a question during our Q and A session, one of our artists about this and about how do I stay in a situation with my marriage when I'm growing but my husband is not? Do you remember this question? Okay, so I'm gonna have you address this and then I'm addressing from the male perspective.

But I kind of gave her like, I just kind of gave her my story and my experience. Because, for example, like when you come to just our hair class, it's not your average hair cost. It's really dealing with a lot of like, mindset relationships. Like, you can't produce in life if you have like a shitty mindset. So we try to like break the stylus out of like old patterns, behaviors and things like that. But anyways, you come to these events and you feel. We always joke around. We're like, you're like in a time warp. You leave and you feel like you're on fire and you're like addicted to girls growth and you want like, more, more, more, more, more. And you're on this like high and then you go home and you feel like your significant other is just like a bump on the log. You're just like, come on, like. And you want to be excited and like share all this, but at the same time they're like, they're not moving. And so then you become like unattracted to them because you're like, God, I'm so excited and you're doing nothing. And we always say like, if you're stagnant, you're actually like Moving backwards. Once you catch the bug of, like, wanting to grow and learn, if you're stagnant, you just. I get like, panicky. I'm like, oh, my God, I feel like I'm going backwards. And you kind of do. Do you kind of like, get in your head a little bit and you literally revert back a little bit. And this doesn't matter how successful you are in life or how much money you have. That's just the game of life is to grow and learn. So anyways, this particular stylist was just like, I swear she was looking at me like she wanted me to give her permission. Like, yeah, go home, get divorced, girl. You got this like a lady boss. Let's do this. And I'm not really about that. I'm very much about, like, it takes two people to get in a certain situation. And I'm not going to give you permission to go home and divorce your husband. I'm not going to do that. So I share based on my experience and my stories. And I just told her, I said, you know, I get where you're coming from. And I said, but sometimes you just have to stay in your own lane. And what I mean by that is when Garrett, we kind of lost everything and he was trying to discover himself and really work on himself and his business and all that. And I was always literally like, oh, my God, like, just figure it out. And I was like, so genuinely, like, annoyed with him. I'm like, just figure it out. And as he was trying to figure it out, he was going to, like, business retreats and self help things and all this stuff, and he would want to share with me. And I was like, you're being fucking weird, you know, And I just was like, what? Just figure shit out. Like, just get it done. And so it got to this place where I. He would want to share, but I was like, no. And then he felt like I wasn't growing. And I was like, what are you talking about? I don't have to go to these classes to grow. I can grow on my own, my own pace, my own way. And I was like, I don't need to go to these seminars, Garrett. It is what it is. And then I kind of got to this place where I'm like, okay, I need to. Maybe I need to work on me. I don't necessarily have to go to these seminars that he's going on, but obviously he wants to connect and he feels like I'm not growing and what could I do to kind of get to that place. And I think for me, it was business. I was like, all right, well, I'm going to just jump into business and see what I can do there. And that really pushed me out of my comfort zone, and I started to grow from that. And I just. I told this woman at the event, I said, you know, I just decided I wasn't going to worry about what Garrett was doing, and I was just going to work on me and kind of stay in my own lane. And to this day, I believe that if you do that, other people will catch your excitement and your bug. And, like, I have women all the time who come to my salon, and they're like, I honestly have been following you for years. And I came because, like, your energy, and I've been following you, and it's, like, infectious. And, like, you're positive and moving forward. And they didn't come for the hair. They came literally because they'd seen a little bit of my journey. And so people want that. When you radiate that kind of energy and that success, they want that in their lives. And so I just told her, I said, if you continue to, like, just have this love and passion for life, he will notice that you have to live life by leading by example. And I said, he will notice this. He will be like, oh, my God, like, this is infectious. I want to know. Like, eventually he'll be like, well, what is she doing? And he might cross the table and he might ask, and when he gets to that place, you know, share with him, bring him along the journey and encourage him to have his own journey. And that's kind of how I just left it. And she seemed like it was like, that was a good. Obviously, she's not getting divorced, so that's always good. Or she said she's at least gonna go home and work on it. So, well.

And this. This situation of change is a difficult one. And as you say, stay in your own lane, the challenge becomes is, like, literally staying in your own lane. Which the way I language this and look at this in relationship, is when you're trying to communicate and you're both in two totally different places, it can be very difficult. And one of the things I noticed had happened, for me at least, was I would attempt to get Danielle to just align with me immediately, as if somehow I couldn't move forward unless Danielle moved forward with me. That was the story I was stuck in. And so then I would come home with these ideas, or I would get these insights or breakthroughs into my life, and what I wanted and where I wanted to go. But I. For some reason, the first 10 years we were married and everything about me, when I wanted to do something, I felt like I had to have Danielle on board to go do it. Like, everything. Even on Saturdays, if I was going to go do something, I felt like I had to have Danielle come with me. And then I got to this point where I realized that my power, my path was going to be about choosing me and choosing a path that I wanted and inviting Danielle along the way. And that was really difficult for me to communicate in the beginning. For some reason, I was very, very much. I don't know, I felt guilty about it. I felt shameful about it. Being able to say, hey, listen, this is where I'm gonna go. I'm going to go this place. I would like you to come with me. If you don't want to come with me, that's okay. I'm still gonna go. And I remember, even on a Saturday, Danielle used to do something that was, like, super irritating. Like, I would create stuff on Saturdays and say, we're gonna go do this. And you'd be like. And you'd be like, no, we're not doing that. And then I would be stuck in this weird place going like, oh, God. And then I would name something else. Well, let's go do this. No, I hate bullying or whatever it was like, no, I'm not doing it. And there would be these things and my. Who would get jacked? Because I was waiting on Danielle to make a decision about what she wanted to do and everything. I said, she was shooting it down. Then one Saturday had this inside. I was like, you know what I'm gonna do? Like, I'm gonna go either way. And I remember I'm sitting there having a conversation with Danielle. I said, I'm gonna go do this thing. And she's like, well, no, you're not gonna leave me for a little day with the kids. I said, great, I'll take the kids with me. And she's like, well, you're not gonna leave me here all by myself. I said, great, and you could come with us. And she's like, well, I don't want to go. I said, like, I told you just literally 30 seconds ago, I'm going to go here and do this thing. Well, are you going to take the kids? Yes, I'm going to take the kids. Well, are you going to leave me all day here? If you don't come with us, you will be left here all day long. Yes. Well, I don't even. I don't even. You know, And I would sit there and I was laughing because here I was, my whole relationship with Danielle, trying to get her to get on board with things, not recognizing the fast way to get somebody on board is just to go. And then they see that you're not kidding around. They're like, oh, they're not fucking around. They're literally going. And then it forces a decision in the mind of the person to get on the board or not. You acknowledging this Saturday FOMO moment.

Yeah, I suffer from fomo. For those of you who don't know what that is, it's fear of missing out.

That was, like, intense. Like, to the point that she will taste everything that I ever order, food wise.

Yeah, it's cannot stop yourself.

It's a medical condition.

It's like, add somebody. I don't even like Disneyland. I don't even like Disneyland. He could be like, I'm going to Disneyland. I'll be like, oh, oh, maybe I want to go. Maybe I like Disneyland. And, yeah, I don't. So.

But you don't. And you've actually gotten better.

I've gotten better because I'm. I'll just be like, I'll be bugged. And then I'm like, all right, I'll go do my own thing. So I'm just like, whatever. But I do like, how you feeling?

Like, you know what I'm talking about. Like, it used to be kind of a bit of a shit show for us.

You know what, though? You don't. You would have a hard time with Saturdays. Just like, I like to have, like, something planned, but I don't have to have, like a giant plan. I don't have to go to Disneyland and bowling and water parks and this. I'm like, why don't we just get out of the house and go to lunch and chill and go to the beach and see where it takes us? Like, I don't like an action packed weekend. I kind of like to just hang out. And so I felt like I was like, I want to do something, but I don't want to go do that. And so I think you've gotten better at just, like, getting up and doing your own routine in the morning. And then it's like we've gotten in this place where, like, you'll get up, surf, do your thing, then I'll get up, work out, do my thing. And then we're just like, all right, should we just get the kids out of the house? And it's not like, let's have the Saturday so planned out, you know, so.

The summary on this, what this particular point here on communication is this like when you're communicating change inside of your relationship, this demands that you actually are committed to going somewhere. And then it's not so much about trying to enroll the other person to going with you as it is inviting them to go to the place that you're committed to going irregardless of what they say or do. Notice the difference. I'm going to take a journey inside my relationship and it's going to be driven based upon the acceptance of my partner to 100% in alignment to go to the place that I want to go. But the hostage situation falls in play with if you're the one that's growing in the relationship and the other person is the one who is not committed to growing and you're constantly submitting to the one who doesn't want to grow, then you're never as a couple or individually going to rise out. And from that place you get and gain resentment and the resentment begins to fester and destroy the relationship faster than just about anything else. And so you have this choice as a man or as a woman, get clear about what you want and from that place commit to go and then invite the partner that you are with to enter into that picture with you. Say, I'd love you to come. And I said I would say that to Danielle. I was like, hey, I'm going to go here. I'd love for you to come. If you don't want to come, that's okay. If you do want to come, we'd love to have you. But if you don't want to come, you don't have to come. This is an invitation, it's not an obligation. But I'm going to go here and if you want to be with us today, then I'm going to be over here. And the more I took that stand, the more our relationship got actually better inside of our form of communication.

Because then it was me having to choose and not feeling like you were forcing or dragging me or doing that. You're like, this is where I'm going.

You're.

Yeah, like you're invited, but you don't have to be there. And for me, that actually works better. Like I don't like to feel like obligated. Like nobody wants to feel like, no. If you go to an event that's like all about self help or self awareness or whatever it may be, you don't want to come home to your Spouse and be like, by the way, you're broken and you should probably come with me and get fixed. Like, that's kind of how it comes across, I think, in the beginning when you'd be like, well, you should go to this. It was almost like, you have to go to this, or I'm not going to stay married to you. And I was like, fuck you.

Well, that's kind of how I felt.

Yeah. Well. And that's not a good way to approach it.

I agree.

A lot of people, they gain this resentment for their significant other or whatnot, because they're not growing. And so it's almost like something that we'd probably even do with our kids. There's probably such a bigger lesson here. Think about with kids, it kind of has to be their idea, and we just have to sway and guide them the right direction. And the same applies even as an adult with your husband or wife. You can't be like, you will do this. Like, it. It doesn't work that way. They're gonna go grudgingly. They're not gonna get anything out of it. You just have to lead by example. But leave the door open, like, you're invited. And. And when you're growing and learning, and you're like, the door was always open for you, I would love for you to be there. So. And it may take. Honestly, for Garrett, I think it took like, a year or so before I finally was like, all right, well, I don't want to go to these. But I knew in my heart, like, I'm like, I gotta work on me. I gotta work. I gotta figure myself out. I think I'd gotten to this place and I shared this story at our events, and I kept waiting for Garrett to, like, wake up and figure things out. I was just like, be the fucking man and pay the bills. Like, just wake up and get it done. And I remember one day, I was, like, sitting there feeling so frustrated, and this voice came to me, and it was like, it's not him, it's you. And I was like, shit. And it was like, it's not him, it's you. And I took it as like, okay, well, maybe I'm supposed to do something. Maybe I am actually supposed to be the producer for our family. Maybe it's me. And that's such a scary place to be in, because when you put the mirror up and you put that blame on you, all of a sudden you're like, I'm accountable for where I'm at right now, and I'm accountable for where I'm going, Right. And so it's. It's crazy. Like, Garrett was trying to get me to go on his path, and I was super resistant. And then all of a sudden, I, like, hit this place where I'm like, okay, I want to surrender, but I didn't know how to surrender because I didn't want to go to the same. I had no interest in the events and things, but I knew I wanted to work on something. And that's when that moment happened for me. I'm like, all right, well. And it was scary because I also, in the moment, I was like, I don't even know if I want to be married anymore. And that's why I chose business to really help me rise and. And go that direction, because I was like, shit, I can't expect any money from him. He's. There's nothing. We're not making any. So I'm. Obviously, Whether we stay married or we don't, I've got to figure this out for myself, because I'm not going to be dependent on somebody else, and I want to have control with where I'm going in life, so.

Well, there you go.

That's where I was at.

That's beautiful. All right, we're going to shift this conversation to another topic inside of communication.

We got five minutes.

Yeah, I know. For five minutes. Our final five minutes. All right, here we go. Okay. So communication. You have two people who are changing, and you have an individual who's choosing, like we're saying, to move forward, driven on the ideal of, here's where I'm going. I'm going to invite you into that picture with me. If you want to come, great. If you don't, I'm still going to go there with or without you. But I would like you to be with me. You're my choice. So once that begins to happen, now we enter into this other stage of communication, which is dealing with the conflict that inevitably rises when this goes down. Now, it's not if conflict is going to rise, but it is that guaranteed, the conflict is going to rise. Now, fortunately, Danielle and I never have any more disagreements.

We just had one two days ago.

I'm totally shitting you, and I would be a complete fucking liar to say that. We never have arguments. So we have conflict, and we have arguments at times. And let's talk a little bit about how control, which I believe ultimately is what caused our fight here two days ago during the event at nighttime, was a control issue, which is a sense of control that you and I have with situations, we both want to feel in control and feel like we own the situation. And that becomes difficult to submit to the other person when they are also someone who wants control. So in your world, how have you figured out for yourself when to let go and when to fight for control?

It's interesting because there's a lot of times where I'll feel like I'm fighting for it, and then I'm like, we're on the same team. But then there's also times where I feel like we'll get into an argument over something, and I just needed my voice to be heard. And I think that it impacts you, and you end up shifting a few things in business or whatnot. So I don't really know. I don't know. I think it's hard because sometimes I feel like I'm not really trying to get control, but I'm trying to bring up, like, points that I'm concerned about. And then it triggers you, and I'm like, I didn't really want it to go there. And then it becomes into this, like. Then it becomes into this power struggle. And it's not that I even intended it going there. It's like, I literally bring something up that I'm like, shit's gotta change inside of, like, one of our businesses or whatnot.

And.

And then you get triggered because I think, you know, it needs a change, right? And then. But like I said, like, it kind of just got to this point where we think we were both kind of being dickheads. And then we ended up just going to bed, and then I text you the next morning, and you're like, hey. And I was like, love you. And you're like, love you. And it was. We were good. But I just think. I think we both recognize that in the morning that we were like, okay. Because we had a conversation later where we were like, all right, well, obviously a few things need to be switched or changed or whatnot. And we kind of came to the same realization, but it wasn't like both of us were fighting for the throne and the conversation, if that makes sense.

So the control factor is something that is always going to exist inside a relationship, and it's always going to exist inside of marriage, fighting back and forth for control. And actually, it adds a bunch of the attraction factor to it, because when you're in that space of fighting for control, you're ultimately learning how to go to battle and spar with your partner about what matters to you. And the worst thing that I'm going to have, you consider could ever exist inside a relationship is having a relationship in which there is no collision and communication. The minute there's no collision in communication, you can be sure that somebody inside of that relationship has gone to sleep. They're sedated, they have no opinion anymore, and they're just somebody who's along for the ride, hoping that the thing or the individual man or woman they're connected with is going to take them home to the finish line. So collision must happen inside of that control must be submitted at times in order to ultimately win, to get what you want.

Well, and even to get what you want. Like, sometimes it's like I always say, like, choose your battles. And there's times where I'm like, I feel like I need to bring stuff up. And then there's times I'm like, as a girl and just being stubborn like, I am, I need to let it go. And I think the ultimately that goes for probably you as well. Like, we get to this place where we're fighting over something, that we realize that we're both on the same team, and sometimes we just have to, like, let it go in that moment and then kind of, like, calm it down and then revisit that conversation. I think it's interesting. We've talked about this in some of our other podcasts where everybody has this, and we actually. I heard this term from a therapist that we went to, and she was like, saying, everybody has, like, a lid, and they get to this boiling point where they flip their lid. And some people's lids or pots or whatever you want to call it, are shorter. Like, Garrett might flip his lid quicker than I do, but everybody's got that point where you flip your lid. And when you argue in that place, when you've gone outside of the. The jar, let's say, then that's where it's like, you are literally not even in your, like, right mind. You're like, it's. You can't. At least in my experience, I feel like when we're arguing in that space, it's dangerous because we're saying shit that you can't erase that doesn't serve you. And so I feel like when you get to that place where you have that much respect for your partner, when I feel the going there, I'm like, I just kind of. I'm like, nope. And I have to not talk and just be like, nope, okay, whatever, whatever, whatever, whatever. And it's ultimately always Garrett who flips his lid sooner. Like, I very rarely flip mine sooner. So I go to this place where I don't want to because he'll keep coming, like, kind of like, no, let's like talk about this. And I. It takes so much in me to be like, it's not gonna fucking serve you, Danielle. And I literally am like, no, no. And he'll keep coming at me and I'm like, no, I'm not gonna talk about this. And he'll keep coming, like we were at dinner and I'm like, I'm not gonna talk about this. And I did want to talk about it, and I did want to address these important things, but he had already flipped his lid. And so I was like, I'm not gonna talk about it. And I wanted to be like, fuck you. And like, hold my ground. And I was like, this won't serve me. So I just kind of like surrendered in that moment that I'm done with this conversation. And then we revisited it the next day, so.

Well, there you go. There you go. We added two nice little tidbits today. Our little growing Game of Thrones.

We gotta go. We got dinner reservations. So we're gonna wrap it up and we're gonna say your two key points for this show is learn how to communicate with your partner in that safe zone. And then what's your point?

And the other one was, is learning inside of this. When you're growing and your partner may not be growing at the same speed, you gotta stay committed to what you want, move forward, invite them into the picture.

Done.

Done. Thank you so much for being for the show. We are actually going to go to dinner on our date night in between a huge event series that we are running right now between BMS Warrior Wealth Summit.

I'm so excited to have dinner and do nothing.

CT Summit. I know, I'm just gonna sit and do nothing. All right, thank you so much for being here. We will see you guys here next week on the Date youe Wife podcast. Again, if you are wanting show notes, tips, tricks and action guides here for this show, you can head over to dateyourwifenow.com also, if you are a man down this journey and looking for more guidance on this topic of the Warriors Way, you can head over to warriorbook.com or thekingskit.com learn more about a 30 day program and the book Warrior Book and be the man that we'd love to ship to. You find that out over there@thekingskit.com and or warriorbook.com for all of you. If you are artists or stylists in the game. Check out bigmoneystylist. Com and if you're an individual who is looking to get your hair done, beautiful like my wife inside of the extension world, you can always do that@haerextensionsecret.com today my friends. All I got for you. We'll see you here next week on the date your wife podcast.