The Power of Therapy: Healing and Growth in Relationships

Why are you a critical bitch? I'm like, huh? Huh?

And I've told you that. I've even set it publicly on record for the last four or five years. I've said, I used to have a narrative about my wife. She was a critical bitch. You've learned in therapy, you hide your emotions, you hide your feelings. You don't share them with the world, and you don't share them with me. So what I've gotten is your anxiety mixed with your five enneagram hidden behind closed walls of the castle. And then you shoot your little missiles out. You. Your little criticisms. Criticize, criticize, criticize. And you're like, I'm not being critical. I'm just pointing out what is. And I'm like, no, you're being a bitch. And, yes. And so you. Your bipolar is a shield. Yeah. Your version of bipolar is shield. And what that gets interpreted as is critical bitch. I am bipolar, and I have all kinds of psychosis going on with my personalities. And I have built a system called the warriors wave that lets me focus all of them, which is why I'm superhuman.

Yeah.

Well, welcome to this week's podcast for date your wife. Oh, do you want to do it again? Go for it.

No, I was about ready to talk. I was like. And then you went. And I was like. I guess he's. He's on it.

I didn't know why you're opening your mouth. I thought you were just showing me your teeth.

No, no, I. I like to talk with my mouth open versus closed.

That's. It's more effective that way.

For sure it is.

Okay, so here we are. We had another great therapy session today, and I. The therapist asked me how I was, and I said I was fucking pissed.

You're always fucking pissed.

Not always fucking.

I think you almost. If you don't get mad when the therapist is there, it's like you feel like you didn't get your time's worth for sure. You're like, I gotta discover some shit and get riled up. I'm like, okay, well.

And every time I do, I'm a better man for it.

Are you?

I am.

But is your wife a better woman from getting yelled at?

Are you a better woman? I don't know. Are you a better man? You know, somebody told me there's a big. There's a big conspiracy thing going around that Barack Obama's wife Michelle is a dude.

Is that real?

They don't have any pregnant pictures of her anywhere.

That doesn't mean she's a Dick.

They showed some bulges on her pants.

That might mean she's a style, might be dick style.

And they are coming from the far left, which means everything's all about being different. So maybe the change he was talking about in his presidential campaign was, we're gonna change what relationships look like around here. I don't know if it's. I. It's probably not real, but.

No comment.

Well, I have comments on it.

I have comments on everything.

Well, that's why I get so angry in therapy. I'm like, so much bullshit going on.

Yeah.

What's the point of therapy, though?

You can have conversations without getting angry for sure.

But the point of therapy is to release.

Is it for you?

Yeah, for you, too. You've yelled in therapy. You've cried in therapy.

You've screamed in therapy to talk through things. I feel like it's a space and time to. Because we are so busy, it's almost like, hey, let's talk about topics that we might not talk about on date night or we might not talk about in a financial planning meeting or. It's like. It's like when you're kind of like, little things are bugging you about another person. You're like, where's there a safe environment where I can bring this up? Ah, therapy. I thought you had a sticker on your shirt right there.

That's not a sticker. Oh, you're talking about my tattoo or the sticker on the corner.

No sticker on the corner.

Yeah, that's a. That's a sticker from my plant medicine.

I know, but it, like, threw me off. I felt like there was a third eye looking at me.

That's the point of. Is a third eye looking at you from my shoulder? So therapy is something that we have done over and over, like, on again and off again, but we don't really start therapy the first time until, like, 2016. We had never been to therapy before that. Not one time.

I'll ask you a serious question.

Why? Why my hair product is the way it is?

No.

Okay.

I realized that. What? Well, today's session was, like, about kids and how to parent together, and there was something interesting towards the end. And I'm asking this as, like, a genuine question. You, I felt like, were triggered because I told Bailey she was bipolar, and she said, just like your dad. But both you and Bailey say you're bipolar. But if I say you're bipolar, it's not okay. I was just thinking that. I was like, you've even joked around. You're like, I'm 9 polar. And I wasn't saying it in an angry state. I wasn't drunk at that time. I was literally driving. And do you want to know why? She had a meltdown. I didn't finish this story. So we're in Hawaii. We're getting ready. I'm like, hey, we're gonna go down to Waikiki and go shopping. And she was just having one of her teenage manic moments. She was like, everybody hates me. And I even was like, what's going on? Like, she's like, I don't know. I just feel like shit. And I was like, okay. So me and Ruby are all excited. We're getting ready. I go, I'm like, hey, if we don't go now, we're gonna hit traffic. And she's still like, I just hate everything in life. And I was like, Ruby's like, I don't know. So I go, hey, okay, if you guys can be ready in the next 30 minutes, I'll give you guys both 200 bucks to go shopping. Ruby's like, sweet. Ruby's ready in, like, 10 minutes. Bailey does her typical thing where she's like, I'm ready. I'm ready. And then, like, I'm in the car, and I'm like, bailey. She's like, I'm almost ready. I'm like, why am I waiting? And at that point, I'm like, we're going to get stuck in traffic. And she comes downstairs and she goes, get out. I'm driving. I go, no, I'm driving. I rented this cute little Jeep convertible. I go, I'm driving. I want to drive. Just literally, I'm not going F word. I was like, holy shit. And that's when I was like, why are you so bipolar like your dad? Or said something like that. It wasn't even, like, I don't even. I wasn't even, like, angry. I was just, like, frustrated. And I was like, I've been literally waiting so long. And, like. And so then she uses that against me. I'm like, but you were the one that got diagnosed and told me you were bipolar. But if I say you're bipolar, it's not okay.

It's a great question.

Just.

I think I'm just offended. You don't call me nine puller, okay? Don't shortchange me. Seven poles. Ers. Nine puller.

Are you gonna answer? Really?

I. I don't know. You know, I. I don't know. I think it's probably a situation of, like, why do I think because, like, you know, when you say it, it's not like you're saying it like a compliment.

No, but I'm.

Hey, you're bipolar. Thanks for building me this castle and this wonderfully wealthy life.

I'm almost saying bipolar. I'm almost. No, no. When I say it, it's almost. When I felt like for this situation, I was like, whoa. She's, like, out of her mind. Like, throwing a tantrum in the parking lot of the Four Seasons. Like, I don't. I'm almost like. It's almost like I'm reminding myself, oh, it's because she's having, like, a bipolar moment. But I can't say that. And if I do, I'm in trouble. And I'm like, okay. And then you come back and say, well, how about thank you for, like, why do you feel attacked by it? I feel like, to me, I'm almost like, stating, like, this is why we're having this extreme high and low right now is because he's nine, polar.

I think that the offset to it is there is lack of appreciation at times. I feel for the fact that my bipolar has been channeled and built our life with you, which means it's like this. So, like, I was sitting there one time in high school, and I was upset about having acne on my face. I was like, I fucking hate all these zits. I don't like them. They're disgusting. I'm not excited about them. My dad and one of the five brilliant things he said to me in my entire life growing up, this is one of them. Five. That's it. Five. This is the fifth one, maybe third one. I don't know, somewhere in the mix. And he said, well, would you trade your acne for your football skills? I was like, what do you mean? He's like, would you trade him for your football skills? Like, if we could get rid of your acne and with those hormones, get rid of your athletic talent, would you be willing to trade your athletic talent for clean skin? I was like, no. He said, yep, that's how it works. He's like, your power comes with a blessing and a curse. You're starting as a 15 year old on the varsity football team at a school where this has never happened before. And you're on your track to get in a college scholarship, which I did. Dubois State University play football, and that comes with hormones. Those hormones make you play good, and those hormones give you acne. So guess what? My bipolar created our kingdom. And my bipolar tries to destroy occasionally.

And that's fine. But my question for you that you.

Still didn't answer, why do I get triggered?

No. Is why can't I not say it? But you can. I didn't say why you're triggered.

I just said, well, you can't say it.

I'm not allowed to say, hey, you're bipolar. You can't say without you being like you. I'm not. I'm like, okay. Unless you're like, my bipolar made us all this.

Okay, well, can you acknowledge my bipolar made us all this?

Sure. Just like my.

Say it. Say the words. Say, you're bipolar made us all this. Why am I being weird? The point I'm getting to, the reason I get triggered is because you're very selective in how you choose to say things. For example, you will look at my.

Bipolar and say, why would I say this? Castle's amazing. It's because you're bipolar.

It is because I'm bipolar.

No, it's because you work hard. And.

And I learned how to channel my bipolar into the warrior's way system which built it. My psychosis is my brilliance. Take anybody that's fucking built anything amazing. You think normal dudes do this, right? So normal dudes don't do what I do.

My question. So I can't say it, though, at all without you associate it as negative. So if I just said, well, what's.

The context in which you're saying it? Give me the context in which you're saying, I'm bipolar. Hey, babe, you're bipolar. I just would like to blow you. It's not coming like that. It's not like, hey, I'd like to blow you twice. One for both sides. No, it's like, you're negative about it. So I'm receiving a negative.

But you're not saying, house. I would never say, babe. It would be weird if I was like, babe, this is such an amazing house. It's because you're bipolar.

You could. The superpower comes from my bipolar. It does too.

That's fine. But just see how silly this sounds like. Sit in it for a minute.

Okay.

It's because you act like I don't say, I appreciate you and I love you and everything you've done, but I would never be like, God, our house is beautiful, you bipolar son of a bitch. That's really gonna do it for me tonight. Oh, it's not gonna ever. It's not gonna.

Yeah, but when do you say that?

So when I say the context, it's almost like, for me, I'm like, oh, he's having a bipolar moment.

Okay.

Like, if, like, you're going like this, it's almost like, hey, don't take it so personal. Like, with Bailey, when she's getting in the car and goes, get out. I'm driving. I was like, whoa, what the going on right now? I'm like, case, you need to stop being bipolar right now.

Well, she can't be. She'd bipolar.

Okay? But I feel like I need to. It's like people who say, well, I. They like you. They say, well, you could use it both ways. My blessing is my curse. But then you have. People are like, well, Bailey does this all the time. Well, it's because of my anxiety. I'm like, I, too, have anxiety, so you cannot use that card on me. How are you going to show up different to manage your anxiety? How are you going to show up different to manage this bipolar attitude when it's hurting somebody you love that. All I said was, I'll give you $200. Let's hit up the mall and go shopping.

Mm.

So I'm like. I get it. Like, I'm almost trying to remind myself, like, she's having this moment. He's having this moment. And in that experience, when I'm noticing that it's not in a positive experience, if it was in a positive experience, I would never notice it. I know. I would never verbiage it. Thank you so much for being bipolar.

But you only identify it when it's negative. So you won't identify my bipolar with the greatness, only with the negative.

It seems silly to give you a compliment on. Thank you for this.

But it doesn't seem silly to talk about. About it.

If I. If you're having a manic moment and I say, oh, you're acting bipolar.

Okay. And when my bipolar is channeled and producing massive levels and burning 30,000 people.

In a stadium to the ground, understand there's elements where you're not controlling. You're not managing it. It's like me saying, like, well, I. You know, my anxiety is why I'm. I'm so productive throughout the day. I just have all this nervous energy. It's never come across that way to you. It's always like, why are you a critical bitch? I'm like, huh, huh?

And I've told you that. I've even set it publicly on record for the last four or five years. I've said, I used to have a narrative about my wife. She was a critical bitch. You've learned in therapy you hide your emotions you hide your feelings. You don't share them with the world, and you don't share them with me. So what I've gotten is your anxiety mixed with your five Enneagram hidden behind closed walls of the castle. And then you shoot your little missiles out. Your little criticisms. Criticize, criticize, criticize. You're like, I'm not being critical. I'm just pointing out what is. And I'm like, no, you're being a bitch.

I know.

Yes. And so you. Your bipolar is a shield. Yeah. Your version of bipolar is shield. And what that gets interpreted as is critical bitch. I am bipolar, and I have all kinds of psychosis going on with my personalities. And I have built a system called the Warriors Wave that lets me focus all of them, which is why I'm superhuman. If I was a normal motherfucker, I'd go to the library, take you to a fucking chick fil a for dinner, and you'd be happy. No, no, no. You married a psychopath.

There's no question I can ask you without you getting, like, personally, like, offended. I feel like I was just simply stating, like, you could.

Why do you. Why do you receive my intensity as offense?

No, because I just was pointing out that you can say. You can say things like. And I'm just using that as an example.

There's critical polar.

I'm nine, polar. And then I'm like, oh, it's because you're bipolar.

Okay? So if I came at you and I said, oh, my God, it's because you're anxiety.

Anxiety. I'd be like, oh, you're right. Yeah.

No, not in the heat of. Not in the heat of the moment. You wouldn't.

It depends on the context.

Well, exactly. That's why I was asking.

You never come to me calmly and said, oh, babe, is your anxiety flaring up ever? I've never once heard from you, hey, is your anxiety flaring up? Maybe it's always, well, you got the shields up, and you're a critical bitch. It's not like, oh, maybe she's ha. Maybe she's in pain right now, or maybe her anxiety is flaring up. I've never once heard that from you.

I've never once heard you come to me and say, man, you must be having a manic or depressed moment right now. How are you doing? Are you okay?

I know.

Yeah. Don't be a hypocrite.

That's what I'm saying.

It goes, seriously, look at this. You're asking me all these questions about keeping yourself shielded up behind Your wall.

You act like it goes one way and it doesn't.

It doesn't. That's why I'm bringing it back across the court. And you won't respond.

You just said you're a critical bitch. I was like, oh, I know.

And I'm a bipolar asshole.

I've never once had you even acknowledge my.

That you're a critical bitch?

No. That you have never even had.

That is not true. I have. The last four or five years, I've had huge empathy, and I've talked all about it. I talk about use a stack to transform a story about my wife being a critical bitch to my wife being caring and concerned about the progress of our family. I have told this on stage. I've shared this at events. I've talked to you about this, so you can't go there.

I haven't heard it, so maybe I need to hear it more.

We should get you some ear cleaners. Hey, runner, show up here. We're keeping that in the show. Okay. So here's the thing, though. This is a definite challenge for couples because particularly two powerful people. And the piece that I've always had. This is why I love therapy, because it allows you to be reflected back and it allows me to be reflected back, too. But one of the biggest concerns I've had, and anytime we have a conversation is you always want to make the conversation about me. And then you'll jab me and say, why are we always talking about you? Because your natural defense is to keep your shields up and then make it about me. I'm an easy target. I'm like a fat fucker who smokes. I'm a fat fucker who smokes. You know what happens to the fat fucker who smokes? It's easy to see his problems. He's a fat fucker and he smokes.

I think it's because you talk a lot. It's just hard to get a word in. And it's like. It's just. There's lots of talking.

Last show. You talk 40 minutes.

Last show. Which show was it?

The one we just recorded.

You just throw a random numbers.

Do you want to go time it?

You can. I think that's super childish, but if you want to, like, go through it.

You don't like that?

No, I think you like to throw out things like where it sounds like, well, we can record it. We can time stamp it. I'm like, you throw out the most random numbers. Like, don't. It's. I'm. It just sounds silly.

So we need to verify is what you're saying.

No, I think it's a silly thing to be like, I can timestamp this and verify you talked for 40 minutes. I'm like, this is. Anyways, let's keep.

We just said, I always talk, and you never get to talk.

You do the majority of time in therapy and in podcasts. You talk more.

I talk more. Always.

I know.

You sit quietly most of the time.

Yes. That's how you're saying so there's a lot of talking going on.

What would you like me to do? Sit here behind a wall and stare at you? No. I fire off some critical bitch comments. What do you want me to say?

Sure.

What do you want me to do? What do you expect? Remember, you started this topic. I didn't. I wasn't going this direction. You brought this up.

I was more thinking of, like. I, like, literally was like, why was he so angry last night? And I was like, oh, Bailey said something that triggered him, that she used it against me, and now it's firing back on me. I was like, oh, I bet she does that a lot. Like, paints a situation in her favor if she doesn't get what she wants.

But do you. Do you consider in a heated moment like that when you say something like that, like, you're bipolar, your dad's bipolar, and I can't handle both of you when you say something like that, do you know that comes with consequences? You don't get to just fire shit off and then not have a consequence for it.

That's the problem is you weren't there. Okay, so let me finish. You weren't there in Hawaii. You just assumed I said it out of a drunken stupor, which I did not. You didn't hear the context?

Well, you said, it's sober. That's even worse.

I don't know if it is, because what I had gone through the last couple hours with her and just trying to get her out of her manic depressive, very supportive, like, and to the point where then she was kind of rude to me and was like, get out of the way. I'm driving. I'm like, no, you're not. And then having, like, a complete meltdown, I was like, oh, my God. Like, I've been so patient for the last two hours. Like, I'm. I'm like, I don't know what else you want. So it's. She then uses that when she doesn't get what she wants with you, and she'll say something to try to get it to Almost position me as the bad guy. It's like, I'm competing with my daughter, but my daughter's not married to you. And so then I'm like, why? I'm like, what in the world? So then you're mad at me off of listening to her story and favoring her and what she said, and you didn't hear the. The whole context behind the story.

Right.

So then I can tell. I'm like, why is he. Like, last night when you come to bed and you're, like, trying to pick a fight with me, I'm like, hey, I was just trying to go for a peaceful walk with you and the babies and, like, hang out. And, like, I understand you're heated in a conversation with Bailey. And I even said that. I'm like, I'm not fighting right now. I don't know what you and Bailey talked about. I didn't think it seemed appropriate to keep our two young kids and our niece in that environment, so I took them on a golf cart ride. So you came in at me heated, ready to battle, but I didn't even hear what you and Bailey had talked about. Similar to how you didn't see the situation with Bailey and I in Hawaii, but somehow felt like you needed to come confront me. So I'm just, what are you.

What are you trying to uncover with all this?

I just realized that. I just realized, like, sometimes you take Bailey's side.

I do.

Like, and. And you're mad at me for something I said to Bailey in Hawaii? I thought that was interesting. I was like, huh?

You thought it was interesting?

I did think it was interesting.

Like, that was your first thought that was interesting.

I thought that's interesting.

You thought that's interesting now or yesterday?

Doesn't matter. I still think it's interesting.

I think it's interesting that you can fire off comments and not be responsible for them.

I hear that a lot from you, too. And I would say the exact same thing goes for you and behaviors. I've seen you fire out a Bailey when she was younger. Things I can't unsee.

I got it.

So. And there's. You always say you can say things without being responsible. I don't agree with that at all. And when you don't see the context behind how it was said, then Bailey's not responsible how she acts.

I didn't say Bailey's not responsible. But you're responsible, too, as an adult.

That's fine.

So you're responsible for what you say.

My question was, how come you can say you're bipolar, but if I do, I'm in trouble. I wasn't heated.

I wasn't saying you were in trouble at all.

Right. So that's what I found interesting.

But here's the thing. It's crazy. So you're bringing this point up, but then I'm trying to have a conversation with you about it, and I'm trying to create a game of equality, which is like, okay, cool. So I can. You can say that. And I'm saying it's the context in which you're saying it. I know I'm bipolar. I get that. I understand. That's the game that I live with, and that's the game I play with. I understand you're an anxiety crazy person. And so your anxiety has you up 15 times a night, has you checking doors, thinks our kids are kidnapped, and been sex trafficked when they're in a different room in the house, all based on your anxiety. And I get to live with that. Right? So. And if I came to you in fighting situations like that, and I said, oh, my God, babe, your fucking anxiety is ridiculous, or I'm like, I can't handle having so many people with anxiety in my life right now. There's too many people with anxiety. I don't suffer from anxiety. I don't have it like you do. I don't have crippling anxiety that makes me fall to the floor. I don't have this. I have bipolar. I have my own issue. You have your own issue. But, see, we spend all this time talking about my issues because you always reflected back to me. When are we talking about your issues? You're not guilous in this. We love to talk about Garrett's issues. It's like the joke I see constantly, which is like, we're constantly working on improving my husband.

You're still doing. I'm gonna circle right back around to the exact same question. Yeah, you were angry at me based off of me telling Bailey that her and her dad have. Are bipolar. But you didn't. You weren't in Hawaii, and you didn't see her behavior. Okay, I'm not. And I even said this in therapy. I'm like, I don't know if this is any better. I actually was sober when I said this, but based on, like, what had been going on for the last couple hours, I was just like, holy, I can only be so patient for so long. So I had already taken accountability in. Even later with Bailey, I was like, hey, I'm sorry. Like, I'm just irritated. We went out Went shopping, had dinner, had a great time. Even in therapy, I'm like, I don't know if it was much better. But what I didn't like is that Bailey kind of used it to almost, like, get you to side with her. And I was like, I'm work. I'm rather me and you be on a team, and I don't want to have you come get mad at me in this specific situation. Situation. For some reason, you keep turning this whole conversation. Well, let's talk about you and your anxiety and your accountability. I was just Where. How we left today in therapy was very jarring for me.

Okay.

And I was like, okay, how can we bring closure to this specific conversation? Because you were clearly angry that I said that you and Bailey are bipolar, and I can't handle this from two of you.

Well, I'm less than.

But you weren't there in that situation, so there's no reason to be angry at me for a situation that you weren't in.

Well, it's not just that. It's like, 20 years of being married. So we've been dealing with this reality, which is there's always this narrative that seems to show up. Not always. Most of the time, Garrett is doing something wrong. Garrett needs to change. Very rarely are we ever in. Danielle's fucking wrong, and Danielle needs to change. And by the time we get to that conversation, it's now your idea. So how many years did I have to come at you about sex? How many years? 12. 12 fucking years I had to come at you about sex before you decided to change.

I still didn't get closure on the question. You keep changing the subject.

What I'm saying is that we. You. We continue to loop these subjects on me. The subjects come back on me because I'm an easy target. I'm a fat fuck with a cigarette. Your stuff's guarded, hidden secret. You're. You're perfect pictures on the Internet. I'm not. I put my whole world on display.

Everybody. Everybody. That's your brand. That's you.

Okay, so I'm. I know. So I'm an easy target. So he's saying, why am I triggered? Because the context in which you say it, it's not like you were saying in a positive way. When I say I'm bipolar, I'm like. It is what it is. I'm speaking as a fact.

This full story with you.

You released your rage at Bailey and me in your frustration with how she was showing up. I hear you.

Okay. But now that I've shared the Context.

Was it justified?

No, I'm not even asking if it's justified. Are you still angry about it? You seemed angry, and I was like. And that's why I said, why can you call yourself nine polar? But then you hear a story from Bailey and you literally. You were angry at me last night, and I was like, I was taking the babies for a walk.

I was dealing with a situation with my daughter that I constantly. I don't see you in the middle of these arguments. I'm the one that's constantly dealing with the disciplined side of Bailey and trying to build structure and infrastructure was doing things. You default that to me every time. So what I was frustrated about had nothing to do with what was happening in Hawaii. What I was frustrated with had nothing to do with what was going on in the past, had to do with the fact that I just spent an hour dealing with my daughter over bullshit. And so I came inside, ask you one simple question. Did you say this? That's all I said. Did you say, you and your dad are bipolar and I can't handle being with both of you? That's all you and I were fighting when you were in Hawaii. We were battling through text for two straight days, which led to therapy, led to a whole bunch of breakthroughs. And you said some things. I was just asking you, did you say them? And then you got upset at me and said, I'm not talking about this with you right now.

I said, yes, I did say that. And then you did the thing where you, like, kind of kept talking and talking. I was like, I'm not going to win right now. Because I knew you were in a bad space because you had just.

And you were in a bad space when you said it to Bailey.

Okay. But that's why I ended the conversation. I was just like, hey, I'm not going to argue tonight. I'm going to go put Isla to bed. Like, I'll see you later. Like, we're not going to have a clear conversation. I thought I knew we were having therapy. I'm like, I can share the backstory with him, but I could just. I could just tell. You were like, in therapy, you were like, I am fucking upset. And I was like, it's something when you're that mad, and I always know it's like a past trigger. So I'm always trying to, like, kind of figure out what that is, but it's hard to get through to you because it always comes back like, well, Garrett's the up. What's wrong with you? And I'm like, I'm not even trying to say that right now. I'm just trying to figure out why in that I've been talking about this whole podcast. Why? Again, same question. How come I cannot call you bipolar but you can call yourself that? And then it's like spirals into like. You need to take accountability for your anxiety. I'm like, simple.

Do you want the answer?

I've worked hard on myself and my anxiety.

You want the answer?

No, because I feel like you're a little bit condescending right now, and your energy is kind of weird, so I'm not sure.

So you just asked me a question. I spent 30 minutes on our show coming back and looping the same talk. But now you don't want the answer.

It was like, do you want the answer? Like, I'm not sure, to be honest.

If I'm being very honest, do you want the answer?

Sure.

It's really simple when I say it, I'm not saying it from a negative place. I'm bipolar. I can own that. My bipolar is my superpower. It's a positive thing for me. Most bipolar people like me can't fucking do shit. I created a system called the Warrior's Way, which was personally given to me by God, uncovered and revealed to me to help me focus my psychosis every morning. You finally came to terms with that and realize I need to stack. I have to hit my core. 4. I've got to do my shit in the morning, because if I do, then I line up all my craziness into one centralized. And with it, I destroy shit, build shit, can take stuff from zero to millions of dollars in a month. I can create big shit with my superpower. Now, when I reference my bipolar, I never reference it from a place of like, oh, my God, my bipolar. I wished it would go away. I fucking love my bipolar. I have no problem with it. When you reference my bipolar, it's not coming from a positive frame. It's coming from a negative frame. So the reason I get triggered is because I'm not calling myself bipolar, as if I'm putting myself down. I'm calling myself bipolar. Like, I'm like, you wish you were bipolar, motherfucker. You can't do the shit I do. Cause you're fucking normal. I'm not normal. I'm crazy. I have multiple voices going on in my head. Every time Bailey's like, I got intrusive thoughts. I was like, I had fucking intrusive thoughts from the day I was born. I have intrusive thoughts all goddamn day. Why do you think I spent 14 years learning how to meditate every single day, 20 to 40 minutes? The pressure I deal with, the game that I deal with yesterday. You're like, okay, what's the context? I'd already worked 10 hours that day. 10 hours. And I came home to that chaos with the fight, I think. And before that, I'd worked 10 hours a day before. So if you were looking. If we're talking about context. My context was I was at the end of a work day, and my daughter came in asking for one more thing after violating rules from the morning, and it turned into a conversation. Now, what would have been the easier thing that you would have typically done? You just swept under the rug and said, find, whatever, and you moved on.

I think I could sense that you were a little bit tired. Tired. And that's why I kept saying, like, I made us dinner. And I was like, I didn't really care if we had any, like, deep conversations. I just was like, let's get out of the house and go for a walk. And you're like, no, I'm good. And I was like, no, I think we need to get out of the house, because I could sense that about you. And so, literally, as we're getting ready to go, I got the dog to the double stroller.

You did great.

I'm, like, got my. I'm chipper. I'm happy. Like, when you're tired, I'm like, me, too. Let's just keep it light and. And talk and walk and whatever. So I think. And I expressed this today in therapy is I was like, oh, I was a little bit sad that, like, that situation with Bailey happened. I can understand why when you gave me the context of the story and the drinking and with her friends that weren't supposed to, I was like, oh, I can see how that, like, triggered you. You're already at the end of a long day. It triggered this conversation. So, like, I totally understand that. And I just. I woke up feeling like you were kind of mad at me. And I was like, I felt like last night, I sensed that you were tired and that I was trying to connect and make it lighter because it. You were tired.

Okay.

And I was tired, too. We had been out on the 4th and had family and lots of fun and shenanigans, and I was kind of tired, too. So I was like, oh, Like, I don't know how. Sometimes I'm like, I don't know how to help Bailey because sometimes she's very illogical. With, like, her comments. And if I me or you are tired, I don't know if our response to her is the best, because it's. Then she derails and is like. Starts saying stupid shit that's, like, irrelevant. So I almost feel like with Bailey, specifically, our teenage daughter, who we know has both bipolar and anxiety, she's the perfect mix of both of us. I feel like we need to be very strategic with timing with conversations with her.

Okay.

That was, like, the only solution I could think of is, like, okay, do I agree with anything Bailey did? No. If she would have came to me and said, can I stay out till midnight? I would said no. And she would ask me 75 more times. And typically, when she asked me 75 more times, I say, if you ask me one more time, not only can you not stay out later, but you've lost one of your weekend days to stay out later. And I take. Would physically take her car keys. So for me, it's kind of like. Like, if I know I'm tired, I try to consciously not open myself up to those conversations. Even with you last night, like, I knew you were irritated, but I was like, I'm kind of on the edge too, and if I entertain this anymore, I'm gonna flip my lid. And so that's why I walked away. And I was like, I'm not gonna argue right now. I'm gonna go put eyelid.

Good job.

But I'm just saying, like, I wanted to have a little bit of closure in the. In the situation that happened last night.

So what kind of closure do you.

Need to turn into us, like, attacking one another?

Okay, so what kind of closure do you need?

I think my closure is just with. With kids, like, and adults. Like, it has to be. And I like the idea that we came to today of, like, hey, let's have, like, a family meeting every day where we can figure out where we're at with all the kids, business travels, trips, and things like that. So if we're like, hey, we really need to talk to Bailey about curfew and what's acceptable and what's not and what's the consequence? And then. Then it's like when we have these heated conversations where she's like, can I hang out till 12? You're like, no, Bailey, and guess you can't, and tomorrow we'll discuss why or whatever it is.

Okay?

So I just think we're both way too busy to let this. Let a. Let this kind of big but small derail the work that we've done individually and together.

Did it derail it?

Sometimes I feel like we backpedal a little bit where I'm like, why are we bringing up shit that we've already worked through? Like, why? And it's almost like we're just mad at each other or just mad in general. So we'll bring up. Well, both of us will bring up past situations, and it's. And I'm like, we've already, like, kind of worked through that. So instead of spending too much time in the weeds or where I feel like we're backpedaling, I'm like, okay, that's great. Like, how can we. Let's. Let's figure out what we need to do so that a situation like this doesn't cost us a half an afternoon in a podcast.

I got it. Well, we're here processing that. So what good came out of it?

Everyone gets to listen. That we're real married people trying to parent teenage.

Okay, so what's your conclusion then? Like, what did last night's event lead to that's positive for you?

I think what it led to for me is that we do need it. We're so busy, and the idea of having, like, we do our weekly date nights. We do our weekly, like, numbers with Jeff. We do our weekly podcasts. So I like the idea when you were like, we need to have a. A weekly meeting. At first, I resisted it because I was like, we can't talk about Bailey every week. That's just a lot. But if we use it as a time to, like, go over, like I said, schedules or trips or conflicts or things with the kids, then I feel like there's less opportunity for. For things to get heated and blow up to a level that's not effective.

Agreed.

All right. There you go.

Are you feeling complete?

Sure.

Are you sure?

I'm. Did I talk for 40 minutes?

Almost.

Okay.

You're doing good. I guarantee you, if we go back and listen to the audios, the last, like, three shows, four shows, you've done majority, over 50% of the talking. Okay, that's good. We were practicing that. So each one of these things lead to good things. Listen, we used to be on date night, and I would yell and throw shit. So we've come a long way. We first started with, if you look at what's happened to us, like, the fact that we're still married is a fucking miracle. Yeah. Because of the fact that we've hit so many crossroads where people would just fall apart. You know why? Because I'm bipolar. So I can pull through. Normal guy wouldn't pull that off. You knew what you were getting into when you married me. You just met peaceful Zen side of me. Then business guy came out and you were like, what the fuck is this? I want a peaceful Zen hi Guy you catfished. You got reality checked with, like, catfished a little bit. Well, listen, I met her the same way. I thought you were like, super sweet and nice all the time, and then you weren't. I was like, God, she's like Barbie with a fucking Edward Scissorhands. She's like Daniel Scissorhands at times. So listen, like, here's. We have to admit, I'm an. You're a. That's it. Like, there's a piece of you. It's a total. She's selfish, doesn't listen. She's not nice. She's not emotionally expressive. She's not empathetic. And then there's me.

I don't get on these podcasts and be like, my husband's an asshole in a warrior castle. I don't know.

I'm an. I'm an asshole for sure. You're. That's what you're even bringing all this up for? You're not bringing this up because it's like, oh, God, my husband's soul is so beautiful. Let us talk about his soul now. You're like, you were an asshole last night. You're just not saying it because that's.

Not your real married issues that probably most people don't talk about. Of course, value and give you a three step program.

Here we go. This week. Welcome. We're going to be in the book, the book of Psalms, chapter 9, verse 3. And we're going to read from the book about the guy that killed a guy to fuck a girl in order to inspire you about marriage. Such bullshit. Most couple podcasts are such bullshit, particularly the ones with like, therapists that are trying to be fucking smart. And I always love it when you have like the ball punching, like, therapist who's married to the handbag husband who's like, that guy for sure rides fucking shotgun. That guy. That guy for sure is hearing. That guy for sure is hearing this from his wife. Blow me.

For a second I was like. She's like, for a second I was like, blow me.

And you're like, what the fuck did you just say? Like, you heard me. Get over here. Blow me. And he's like, okay, all right.

Shotgun. Maybe that's why Obama. Maybe he's into that. We don't know.

Welcome to the real White House.

Yeah, you. You were pitching that hard on your social media.

You're like, yeah, you want to hear it? It's awesome. Let's play it.

I woke up to it. Some mornings I wake up and you're.

Like, how can I be inspired? Listen to my bipolar husband.

I know I must like all your stuff. I'm a big fan, because every morning I. When I turn on my Instagram, yours is the first post that shows up.

And.

And sometimes it's like. I'm like, oh, it's.

So here's a great. Here's a great one. You ready? Here it goes. No president's going to save you, bro. No president's going to save you, sweetheart. You are the real White House. We are the real White House. The government, the politician. Fuck them all. We the people. Black, white, Asian, Latino, male, female, don't give a. We the people, the American citizens. The United States of America. We the people, the government. What they're saying, what the media is saying, what the church is saying. It is time for us to unify and rise. No more riots. No more. No more separation. No more disconnection. No more dysfunction. Unified. One unit, one strength, one purpose, one mission. Survive and thrive in the darkness that is coming, and you have a chance to lead in it.

Did I get a lot of hits?

Just your. Like, it's all I needed. Just your heart. That's why I posted it, for your heart. Actually, I have a couple that went off about sex and a whole bunch of other ones that went off from a few episodes ago.

Oh, man. Do you know what? Somebody commented on mine, and this was right when you came in, and I was kind of triggered. I was reading and somebody goes, can you. She goes, I've been following you for your hair, not this nonsense. I was like. And it was just on one of our podcasts. I'm like. She goes, I love your hair tips, but I am not following for this nonsense. That's what she said.

And I guess what you say, bitch.

No, I off. No, I did not say.

Let me say, are you a buyer? No, bitch, you're a follower. Get the fuck out.

No, I said. I just said, oh, the good news is you could unfollow.

That's what you said.

Yeah.

You said, oh, the good news is you could unfollow.

I just said, money and follow.

You said, why don't you unfollow?

Yeah, I can't remember.

Just punch a sometimes.

I just said, why are you. I just basically said, okay, go ahead and. Oh, no, this is what I said. I said, I'm gonn be me all of the time. And if you don't like it, unfollow.

Not a girl. That's like three different versions, all of them.

I was like, I can't remember what I said, but I was so annoyed. I was like, oh, I'm sorry.

Why don't you just punch him?

I was like, you just wanted to see the pretty hair.

Yeah, why don't you punch her?

And then I'm like, oh. I'm like, I was thinking about Instagram. I'm like, so wait, if I like pretty fashion and hair? Like, I can't like other things. Like, you can only follow somebody for one thing. Yeah, people, sorry, we only want to see your shoes and your hair. I'm like, okay.

People say that under myself. And then they get a big go yourself. And then they get a go yourself from people who follow me too. So if anyone tries to jump on the bandwagon now, they just get a giant horde of go.

Yeah, it's. You always get other comments, like, right after, immediately, they're like, I love everything you post. Like, thanks, guys. But I was just like, I think I was triggered by the fact that she's like, can you not post this nonsense? I'm like, nonsense?

Were you triggered by it?

Yeah, I was like, nonsense.

Like, triggered by bipolar? No, you get triggered.

I don't get triggered a lot, but.

Just by random bitches online.

It's always the random troll. Because here's what I don't love that women do. And they'll be like, we support all women, and you have to support women.

What about women with dicks?

You're not listening.

All right?

Women act like they have to support all businesses, but then you have women that are like, what's this nonsense? And you're like, oh, wait, I. I thought you were a big woman promoter supporter. But if you're bugged by my nonsense now, you're not a supporter and just drives me nuts.

I'm like, let's face it, women are far more savagely brutal with each other.

I feel like.

Which is why I can't figure out why women would allow dudes with dicks to call themselves chicks. I can't believe you're letting him in the club. How are you letting dudes take over the chick club?

I thought you were done with this conversation.

I'm obviously not. Here I am. It's just coming out. I can't stop it. It's my bipolar.

I seriously, I'm a little More open minded with that.

You're open minded that a guy, dude with a dick could call himself a chick? Do you know what I do now? I go into the restrooms and I check stalls in the women's restrooms before I send my girls in. No, I do it now.

That would be weird. I'd be against that.

No, that's what I'm doing. I took our girls to go to the restaurant at the clubhouse. I took them over to. Over to the point. We went to different places. I'm now walking in the bathroom and making sure there's no dudes with dicks in the bathroom. This is where we're at.

That is a little weird. I feel like if you do actually have a dick, you should use the men's. I don't care if you want to identify as a woman, but like, I don't want to walk in and see a man peeing in the girls bathroom. And if I bring little kids in, I would be.

This is why I'm like, I'm telling you right now, dude with a dick walks into the restroom with my daughters. I will fucking kill this guy.

That's aggressive.

I'll put his lipstick all over my fucking fist. I'll bloody him right there outside the bathroom.

If he walks into the bathroom.

If he walks into the bathroom, I'll fuck him up.

I don't know if that's something you should say out loud.

I will him up publicly. So if you happen to be some psycho who happens to be watching the show, well, now you know, you better walk in a different bathroom.

I haven't experienced that.

Well, here's the deal. You're a mom, right? So you have different defense mechanisms. As a father of four daughters, I have totally different defense mechanisms. Why? Our kids don't need two moms. They need a dad and a mom. They need a penis and a vagina to lead them. Not two vaginas, not two penises.

I kind of disagree with that too, but.

Oh, you do? Tell me more.

I don't think that you can't have a gay couple or lesbian couple lead a child. I don't believe that.

I know they can lead a child, but what can they lead them to?

I just don't agree with you on that one.

I know you're in the hair industry. You can't so often.

No, it's not because I'm in the hair industry. I think it's a little judgmental. I'm like, you can't say they can't have a good upbringing. You're assuming that everybody with a wiener and a vagina is the perfect role model for their versus, like a great gay couple or something. I'm like, sorry, disagree on that one.

I get it. I get your.

Your genital doesn't make you a good parent or a bad parent.

I agree. I totally agree with you 100%.

Sounded like you didn't. So I was like, well, well, I know this.

I know this. Two guys cannot make children. I know that. We know that.

There's men and women that can't make children.

There are. And their women have to borrow sperm to have a baby. So biologically speaking, you need a dude and a woman to make a baby. Or at least you need something that comes out of the penis of a man that enters something that was created in a woman to create life. So two dicks cannot create a baby. Cannot.

It doesn't mean they can't care for one.

I didn't say they can't. They can't care. They can't care deeply. They just can't make babies.

Well, obviously that's.

They can raise babies. Listen, there's a bunch of shithead parents who have penis and vaginas. Yeah, that's why I was saying are shitty parents. They probably fucking have.

One of the facts of things. But I also get the. I also get that. Just. It doesn't mean you're not a good human. You associate. That's like saying somebody that's like, you're overweight, you're a bad human. I'm like, I don't.

I'm not saying anything about gays or lesbians being bad humans.

No, but you, you are very against somebody.

I'm against dudes with dicks who call themselves chicks who walk in the bathroom by durals. I'm gonna fuck em up.

Okay.

I didn't say anything against gay couples.

No, I know, but you, you kind of went that direction. I was like, no, I'm not gonna agree with you on that one.

All right, well, it's a spicy topic.

Clearly.

Clearly. And it's a topic that's being bombarded all over our children. Here's my bottom line. People say, where are you at with gays? I was like, I have no problem with gays. None. Why? Because you got two dudes who know they're dudes and they want to be together. Awesome. It's great. I know of several gay couples. They're amazing. They're great guys. I like them. They're great that they play the roles. It's fantastic. It's Very clear. I'm a man. I like men. Go. Then you got women, lesbians. You're like, cool, I'm a woman. I like. I like women. Clear. You're both women. Go. Then you got a third group which is like, hey, I kind of like both. I like men, I like women. I'm bisexual. Okay? You're still identifying as a woman or a man, but you like both.

So you just don't like when somebody.

I don't like dudes with dicks who call themselves chicks who want to go in the bathroom with my kids because I'm a fuck them up.

Do you want to hear something that's not funny but sad? Sure, some. I can't remember who was saying this. There was, like, a school teacher where the kids were in the background saying they didn't have to participate, or they were barking or making weird noises, and they're like, I identify as a dog so I don't have to follow the curriculum. I was like, that's. That's getting weird.

Like, oh, that's the slippery slope.

Yeah.

I was like, so here's the thing. Here's the thing I want you to consider, right? So here's the deal. Yes. People biblically are gonna be like, gays should not. And I'm like, eh, I don't really give that. I'm not following you. Right? People are like, gays going to hell. I was like, eh, I don't buy that. Cause I get exactly where you come from, right? They're good people. Some of the. You know, the first couple I ever saw that was truly, truly in love was a lesbian couple. I was running an event in Utah, and this young couple, the young girls came in and sat down. You and I were not doing so good at the time. And I was running this event, and this young lesbian couple came in, which was, like, defied all the rules. We were raised under Mormonism. And they're sitting there and there's just love between these two girls. They're engaged to be married. They're, like, totally loving on each other. Not sexual, like intimate, like loving, caring people for each other. And I was like, my brain didn't know what to do with this. Cause my brain was like. My brain was like, wrong, wrong, wrong. Go to hell. Go to hell. But my soul was like, wow, that's like, real. That's real love. And I don't see that from almost any heterosexual couple that I know. So for me, when I look at the space of creation the fastest, if I look at it from the Reason I get so passionate about it is because I've been passionate about the desensitization and the demasculation of men for the past 13 years because I watched it happen to me. You go all the way back to the industrial revolution, where we now get guys to leave the agrarian age and they start moving into the cities, and men start working full time outside their homes. So men are now separated from their kids. Phase two. Men are then sent into the world wars. And these men are taught not to feel. You can't feel if you're gonna go murder another dude. These guys weren't on the battlefield fighting chicks, and there definitely weren't any dudes with dicks wearing skirts out on the battlefield in Normandy. Like, these people were charging. These were dudes charging dudes while women were home. And women at the same time are having to build and run the companies. They're having to go to work, and they're having to raise the kids. So the women are starting to have men and women at home. Guys are gone to battle. They come home. We get the baby boomer generation, which is a whole generation comes back from war and starts fucking like crazy. And they all make babies, right? So that's my parents born baby boomers coming in. My dad comes into the game. He comes into a system where men are taught, you don't need to be at home. Go work. Your money is your importance. You don't have feelings. Because we had a whole generation of fathers who don't talk about shit because they were all war people, all children of war, all men of war. The society of war, a country of war, World War II, World War against the Nazis. Like, this was massive. So an emotional game comes in. Then you bring into the 70s, 60s, 70s into early 80s, and you have a sexual revolution. And inside the sexual revolution, you have feminism born. And feminism now says women should have all these rights, which is beautiful. And I totally agree. Having daughters and a beautiful wife and around by so many amazing women. And at the same time, the message becomes, guys don't matter. I'm a girl. I can do it all myself. Like, a guy makes more money, he thinks, man, I could provide more for my family. A woman makes more money, she says, I could do this by myself. Like, this attitude of feminism started perpetuating, and that feminism is what started calling men toxic. So men are told, you don't need to be at home. Go work. You don't have any feelings. If you do, you're a pussy, by the way, we don't need you because we're powerful women. So go fuck yourself. And now we bring on the information age onslaught of pornography. All this distraction, et cetera. Men are faded all over the place. Now we insert in the information age, male toxicity now becomes a narrative from the feminist side. Toxic males. Toxic males. Toxic. I'm a toxic male. I'm a bipolar toxic male who will still fuck up a dude with a dick outside the bathroom who tries to go in the bathroom and do anything to my children. I'll fucking you up, bro. And that's toxic right there. Very toxic on me to say that according to this thing now, let me finish. Toxic masculinity then gets backended by the ultimate fucking deal, which is dudes are now no longer dudes. We've gone from farming masculine powerhouse men clear to a gamut of dudes wearing high heels, putting lipstick on and calling themselves women who can get hard ons in a miniskirt with tuck and wrap panties. This is the gamut. Now, why do I give a fuck about this? If you destroy men, you destroy marriages. If you destroy marriages, you destroy families. If you destroy families, you turn a nation into slaves. And this is exactly where we're going. So people are like, why are you taking a stand on this when you don't give a shit about gays, lesbians, and bisexuals? Because that's not gender. Oh, there's a fuck ton unconscious men. I've been dealing with them for 10 years.

I think this is where the whole feminist movement came is. It's like women were just, like, treated like a piece of meat for sure. Like, you submit to your husband, you shut your mouth. You're not worth anything. You're not valued food. Don't like, don't even try to go work. You'll never make what a man makes. And so women were taught this. It was like, yeah, go ahead and try, sweetheart. And so then women were like, no, that's not acceptable. I don't want to be relying on a man. Especially think about women who maybe are in an abusive relationship, whether it's physically or mentally. And they're told, like, you're just a piece of meat, right? Then you have these women that are like, you. I'm not a piece of meat. And that's where the rise comes.

I get it.

Because unconscious piece of shit men, right? And so I'm just saying, so you can be like, no, the feminists are so mad and like, at the men. I'm like, well, men were act treating women like pieces of meat. Not all men. Not all of them, but there was.

Not even half the men.

We don't know. We don't have statistics.

It's just like this, looking at feminism.

But you didn't let me finish. So I'm just saying I can. I empathize with the man, but I also empathize with the women. Like it's not a problem to want to work and go provide for yourself and, and in my experience of being in this place where I am successful, I love doing that. I am in a relationship out of. Because I want to connect and be with you and not because I feel like I have to be with you. And still to this day and age, women, women are like, they, they just go after guys that are, they have money and the guys are like, I don't want you anymore. I'll toss you away for the next one. And this still happens. What we're losing is connection. So as much as you're talking about ruining the family, there's also a higher consciousness of connection that has to happen where a male and female are in a relationship because they're choosing it. And that they can and will be equal partners and equals up to it. Doesn't mean like she has to make money and he has to make money. And it's not equal. Doesn't necessarily look like that. But I believe a relationship, it's submission on both ends. So it's not just like, my wife stays home, I make the money, I'm the hunter. And it, that's that old school way of how you're talking about, doesn't exist anymore.

It exists heavily.

I think it's okay for women to want to produce and what it does for the guys is it's waking the guys up to be like, well, I can't just be the hunter anymore. I can't just be unconscious anymore. I can't just pay the bills anymore. Like, the men have to rise and the women have to rise.

You know, there's a lot of men that don't want that at all. Most men don't want that kind of work.

I was just bringing it up because I know, but most men, working, successful woman. And like I'm like in a relationship where I love working, but I love, love being a mom and I want to be with you.

I love it. I love it. And most men don't want that.

I.

Most men don't. You know what?

Most men don't want a woman who wants to be with them.

No, they want a woman that wants to be with them. They don't want a Power producing woman outside the house. Most men do not. I have pulled so many men over this, even for them, multi, multi, multi. These guys are like making tens of.

Millions of dollars that purpose. Do they not want them to have something?

Purpose and having a producing life are two different things.

That fine. I, I love that I have money and I have purpose doing it. And I think that guys, let's take money out of the equation. If they're with a woman who has no drive and no purpose, regardless of the money, they probably think that's safer because there's no competition there. But they require that she has a purpose. So men, they're like, I want you to have purpose, but I don't want you to make money because if you make money, it's going to threaten my masculinity. How is that okay?

A lot of women are absolutely okay with that.

A lot of women are absolutely okay with that.

They're absolutely okay with their purpose being husband and family.

I have realized for the first time for me, I'm like, holy shit. Actually being a producing woman, if this didn't work out with us, might be a threat to guys. They might be like, I don't want to deal with that.

It for sure would be, I'd just.

Rather marry this hot girl who's got purpose, she's easy, she's going to second place. She's gonna do the things like. So I'm like, man, I didn't realize, like, being, having purpose and producing was actually a threat to guys. But I'm not gonna. It's too late. I already love what I do. And I figured out how to make money.

You know, most super producing women over 40 are single.

Well, yeah, because the guys are like, I'll just go for the hottie that's got purpose.

Yeah. And they're gonna stay single for decades.

And guess what? Those women probably don't care because they, they do care.

They sit in masterminds. I'm in. And cry about it. Yeah. These women make tens of millions of dollars a year and they're single and alone and they're for this, the challenge.

But that's insane. It takes a level of submission for a powerful woman. Because you're like, okay, I. Because I've even.

You have to submit back to the one thing that guys actually want.

Yeah, well, it's like connection. Like, I look at it as, I'm like, okay, well, I can be. I got to this place years ago in our relationship. I was like, I was very masculine, started to produce. Maybe not producing at your level. But I was producing and doing great. And I. Part of me was like, I want this connection. I want to be flirty, I want to be doty. I want to do all these things. So I was like, I'm going to go back to channeling this other feminine version of me, which at the time I was like, oh, I'm submitting. And then I was like, no, I really. That was me. I actually channeled this other masculine version of me and kind of brought it back and figured out how to utilize both. And that's why I'm like, I can resonate with the feminist woman, I can resonate with the producing men.

But.

But I do believe to have a good relationship, you have to be able to access both the feminine and the masculine. And same with guys as well.

The challenge you have is that at the core, men want to care for a woman. So if a woman is constantly fighting to care for herself and doesn't submit to being cared for by her man.

Yes.

Then the man ends up losing interest in this woman.

I agree.

Because inherent. It's not training from society. It's primal. Primal. It's in DNA. It's like getting a hard on. It's not like you have to be like, wow, I wonder why I get a hard on. Cause God built me that way. That's why. That's it. And I'm also wired from thousands of years of training as a man to want to provide and protect. This is why the idea of a man walking into the restroom with our children has me want to fucking kill him on the set. That's primal. I don't have to try to make that feeling happen. I'm not sitting here going, oh, God, what would I do? I should probably think about that now. I'm gonna fucking kill you. That's it. Like, there's no ifs, ands, or buts about it. You're fucking done. This is primal. I don't have to try to make this happen. Just like the same game of, I want two other things. As a man, naturally. Naturally. I want to be wanted by a woman. Wanted. I don't wanna compete with her. I want to be wanted. And the second piece is there's a piece of me as a man that wants to be the center of the universe that I have built. All men want this. All men. You can't speak for men. I can speak for men. This is what I do.

I was gonna say I agree with you. Even for me, like, I kind of. I think that's why I Dialed back on business. I was like, so full throttle that I was like, you started making money and doing good. And I'm like, why am I. Why am I pushing this so hard? I actually kind of want to do the mom thing. I want to cook dinner every night. I still want purpose, and I still want to make money. But my business right now, I'm like, it's much more purpose driven for me right now than it is on, like, scaling. I believe I could scale a lot bigger.

You could. I'm sure you could.

And I'm kind of like, you know what? I'm. Right now, I'm in a season where, like, it's making money. I can be with our kids, I can be with you. And a piece of me feels like I'm submitting my career because it's not going to serve me in other. In other areas. And I'm okay with that because you're producing, and I think that's hot. And our kids get more time for me, and that's what I want. And so ultimately, like, I had to kind of even, like, dial in my ego a little bit of, like, I am a producing woman. But what do I want do I want to do I want to be with my kids and my husband and have this chemistry? I do. And I feel like we. We have gotten there over the years, and it's been. Because both of us have chosen it. And so I get irritated when we get in these little, like, debacles where I feel like we want both the same thing.

We do. We always want the same thing. We're just, like, being idiots trying to get there. So I have a therapist. That's why we go on date night twice a week. That's why we meet with our CFO for a week and an hour and a half every week. And that's why we have a new meeting and we have another. Check out the week schedule out and we're gonna wrap this show because I got clients here and we gotta go meet. Here is. Here's our week. We have two date nights a week. We have a short dinner date, typically, and then we have a later go out and have a good time. So. So we have two date nights a week. We have therapy for two hours a week. One time. We have a meeting with our CFO for an hour and a half every week to go over both businesses, both brands, as well as our personal finance. And now we've just added a fifth meeting, which is super sex Tuesdays. So we're putting that on the calendar. Super Sex Tuesdays. That's like as much sex as we can have in an hour.

That's not.

And then we're gonna add a sixth meeting. I'm just kidding. I was like, the fifth meeting is our family planning meeting with you and I talking about each of the kids schedules. Week coming, week just happened. Debriefing the week. And we're making that a calendar year.

We are the real White House, and that's what we do.

Check this out, though. Look what we have going on. Can you believe this? A couple. And then we're wrapping this. We have therapy for two hours every week. We have an hour and a half finance meeting every single week to go over the money. We have an hour meeting to go over our kids every week. We have one date night short to spend time and connect. And then we have one party date night to go out and have a good time till late.

Those are all important.

Five days a week, five times a week. We have strategic planning. This is how you want to know the glue to keeping together. Two individuals who the universe continually perpetuates their own expansion and extraction from each other's global universes. You glue it right down the middle two galaxies. You're glued.

Yeah. You treat your marriage like any business. You treat your household like any successful business. You want a successful marriage and successful household, then if you're a good businessman or woman, you could probably do that at home, too. But it's going to take. It's going to take time and commitment.

And we got that.

I was just making a comment the other day. I'm like, hey, you want to know the secret to being together for over 22 years and. And five kids in multiple businesses? I'm like, go watch the podcast.

It's true. This is it. Hey, this is a good show. I appreciate your passion on it. And yeah, I'm bipolar. And yeah, I get triggered when you say it from a negative context. So there's your answer.

Can I say it like this? I'm gonna say like this. And I need a serious answer. If I say, babe, everything you built, the cars we drive, it's that sexy bipolar in you.

Tell me more. It gives me a hard on. I just got a little blood flow right now. Do you want to go fuck?

If I say it with that tone.

I will just want to take you right now.

What are you going to say about my anxiety? I want a sexy tone.

Go, babe. I love your anxiety. Makes your nipples hard. Those are hot.

Me. It doesn't do anything for me. Again, it's about you. Once again, welcome to the date your wife podcast. Our star host, Garrett J. White coming to you with real content.

My J is my second personality. Garrett White is my first.

That's good.

I will talk to you guys next week. Here's the deal. Listen, we're throwing it down every single week here. We got the real White House TV shows coming up. Excited to have you guys participate in that. Check it out. Therealwhitehouse.com on top of that, also. Wakeupwarrior.com this is our training environment that is training tens of thousands of men and women around the world on using the special tools of the code, the core, the stack, the door, and the game. To check that out, go to wakeupwarrior.com, the Wakeup Warrior challenge is a perfect start for a man or woman to get to know these tools because I will tell you right now, you're listening to real Time Fire. This is how we do life. And guess what? I guarantee you, you have not had the courage to go this deep privately, let alone to put it public and put on the Internet. And I'm not saying y' all have to go public. What I am saying is we want you to win. Like we've begun to win. Right now. We're competing in elite of elite of elite with ourselves. We're not competing with anybody else. Our life, our business, our complete world has been created by design. We'd love to show you how to do that, too, with you and yours. So check it out. Wakeupwarrior.com and get ready for the new show coming, the real White House. And for all of you, hair ladies want to get your hair did and get an amazing extension game going on.

Natural beaded rose extensions and find an.

Artist somewhere near you. We're out. You're gorgeous. Thanks for bringing up the topic. Did you get closure?

Yeah. Got a little spicy, but I feel.

Feeling good now.

89% 89.

Nothing an orgasm can't help tonight.

For you or me?

Both.

All right.

Let's not be greedy. Both of us.

See where this goes.